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I am not well liked. I don't know what is known about me but there is plenty to not like. My Papist notions, my disregard for certain "political stances" (which are contrary to my first stance), my disregard for academia, my belief in tradition, my past life from fighting to more personal matters. I think, even saying that my heart is in the final stages of failure is considered a brag. Or that I have been dead several times, that is considered a brag. Further, I just state what is on my mind. I don't think first. And if questioned I will answer. Usually painfully truthfully. Sure, I have lied. And, sometimes I remember what I am about and refrain or redirect or suggest the topic is not appropriate.
This is part of why I preferred to stay separate for a long time. I am giving things a chance. If it doesn't work out I will return to being a solo act. Who knows where people get their information, what information they get, or how accurate it is. I just know that some things are running through the group like firewater. I will continue to do the best I can. I am not sure how much I am being set up for failure though. I've been here many times before. I have been hated often. For all I know it is deserved. If I think otherwise. Beyond, hate shouldn't be a part of men of God. It is not the way. It means there is a severe failure. I guess all a guy can do is pray and leave it in God's hands?
It is interesting to see a presidential candidate come out for the troops. Santorum is the only one so far, if that might change? In this article, the problems for returning vets is discussed. What is not discussed is that for veterans who do seek help there is a very strong chance that they will gain a negative FBI case file, precluding them from ever buying firearms, and possibly having other implications (such as losing their children should their spouse die?). When you have been filed as incompetent everything is possible toward taking away your rights. And there is no clear way to fight that. With 18 veterans taking their own lives daily, a system that will remove their rights should they seek assistance (they did that to me), and the 18 number being below the real number since only 16 states track the veteran suicide rates, I hope he can move someone to do something?
I sometimes wonder why God keeps me here. Statistically I almost can't still be alive. All He would have to do is let go. I guess He likes annoying other people. For my part, at this time... I'm sort of enjoying it. *grins* And don't go thinking just because I am old and broken that you might have a chance. Don't throw that punch, don't backbite me, don't do it. God has a way, even when it isn't me. He... likes me... in a very odd way. *snap* He has broken more of my enemies than I have. *crackle* Brag? Just the facts.
Just... some things lingering on my mind.
Ah, it's just that you're an odd duck. People don't know what to make of that, and some will attack unwarranted.
ReplyDeleteThe rest? Piss on 'em. Their opinion doesn't really matter, does it?
No, it doesn't matter. Especially since they can't just come out with it. Backstabbers. It's just that, for once in my life, it would be nice not to have to be on hardcore defense, waiting for an attack from behind of one kind or another.
ReplyDeleteThey should realize by now that I know everything they could possibly know about me, and I know they know. And, yeah, I can pick up on hatred. I'm not so near dead that I don't see it all.
A little more time. I guess we will just have to see what happens.