Angry!

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Yes, fine, so I have been doing bits and pieces.  What I have been failing to do is complete purchases, and processes, so that I can complete anything clearly or cleanly.  Buying the drywall repair goods, but missing this and that.  Buying peppers and spices for the sauce, but not all of them or everything.  On and on the list went.  Tonight, when I realized how much I still needed I decided to go right back into town and finish three projects, new and old, and buy a tool or two that had been on the immediate use list anyway. 

I stopped at the hardware store first.  Those plants in hangers I bought?  Yeah, well, though I have wall/ceiling anchors, I don't have a single hook with the length needed to go through the drywall and into wood!  Now I do, and fairly substantial ones.  I also, finally, bought a non-contact voltage tester, along with a tester for outlets (plug-in).  I bought, essentially, bailing wire as well, to put aluminum pie tins under the hanging plants.  Pie tins I would buy at my next stop.  So, okay for those sets of projects.  Next to the grocery store.  I have, after searching four stores, not found Thai peppers.  I will use a thin-skinned form of jalapeno as a replacement.  It'll be a bit milder, from store bought habanero to the jalapeno instead of Thai pepper.  It should, however, be enough to try out.  Further, I kept forgetting what the other spice the recipe called for was, and whether I had it.  I nailed that down before I left.  Oregano was the spice, and no, I couldn't find any on hand.  Now I have it.  As well, dried habanero.  Could that possibly be locally available?  After tearing through some number of stores and not finding it, I finally found it tonight at my regular store.  Go figure.  Dried, 1/2 oz. packages, of the hot stuff.  The recipe seems to call for 5 oz. of that.  Really?  They come in .5 oz packages, each $1.50 or so.  But, okay, just in case, I got 10 packs of those.  Really?  I'll check in a bit.

Not one more project will go underfunded, unsupplied, or such.  When I finally get everything together to go do, I need it ready and there.  I never know when the notion or function will be in place again.  Further, having those plants hanging, having the light up and function, testing the various parts of my home electric which I can do now to a degree, that all adds up to both momentum and morale.  If I have to get a little angry, and dig a little deeper, and track a little harder, then so be it.  No more stop and go, that just kills me, my sense of things.  Sometimes there will be nothing to do for it, as problems arise.  What I can foresee, though, I absolutely have to tend, hard, immediately.  I don't think these docs know how on the tip of my tippy toes I have to be to reach the heights I seem to reach.  They don't understand what I have to do.  I am walking a highwire with a crosswind and the dang thing is greased in places.  They truly do not understand, or that I do it... quite well, given the circumstances.  Most can't, wouldn't even try it, know better.  I just... was never "learned properly".  Bah!

No, I am done otherwise though tonight.  I might try to find ceiling braces, and might further drill pilot holes to install the hooks, then do that.  I might even get the plants out of the bathroom, figure out the water basins (aka pie tins) and 'bailing wire', and have those up for the morning (in safe keeping after I noticed the girls already tentatively digging and ripping off branches... BRATS!).  I will eat something or other.  HUNGRY.  More?  Not so much.  I should sleep well, and maybe a bit earlier, perhaps.  If I can come down from the rage needed to go to town a second time that is.

Later.