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Ah, I think that would be the new day! Heh. I didn't sleep until 6:00. In spite of doing little things all day I simply couldn't tire. Gaming in the last hours probably saved me from staying up even longer. Waking at 14:00, the girls were fed first thing. Well, almost first thing as those water pills are insistent. At least they aren't waking me up several times a night, or every night, certainly not as often as the first weeks of taking them. Weight, a fasting blood sugar, bp, medicine with a potassium slurry, then breakfast. All that before I could probably rightly recall my name.
Something seemed... different this morning. Sam wanted out after scarfing, so... Snow! And it stuck. Not a lot, perhaps an inch or so ended up staying, but the grass still pokes out. I opened the curtains and received a bolt of heat. The reflected sun is a potent thing. It is a good day. I want to go to Church but I can't, today. I must rest. You have no idea how fearful locking your heart into some kind of overdrive is. I won't be doing that again soon. Rest, today. Perhaps Tuesday, since I am going in to take my friend shooting, I can be there for a noon Mass. But not today, not tomorrow. So many things to do, things I want to do, I have the energy otherwise, the tools, the means, the supplies, but... no. I am grounded. I simply won't be complicit in my own death, not on purpose.
I am still hoping that this stretch might be the beginning of expanding my world though. Once I get rested, I want to begin planning to finish some tasks and chores here at home. Then I want to get in to swimming, and if so Church, more regularly in January. I want to find my stride. I want to see how much I can expand my boundaries. Latin lessons will be starting, some time, today. If I get hooked on that I may begin calculus studies again. If that works, between sessions of that, I may add chemistry or physics courses. Just two courses at once, for the foreseeable future, and that only if the Latin lessons hold up. Can I do it? I honestly don't know. I doubt it. But then... look how far I have come. Plus, I am still alive so there is always some hope where there is life?
If I can't get going soon, in a couple of hours, I will try to jump start things with a shower. I had hoped to begin experimenting with minor calisthenics by now, but that will have to wait too. That will be my lead in to swimming, so perhaps I don't spend quite as much time, initially, just catching my breath at the shallow end of the pool, when I start swimming. But swimming... is something else. Even if it is a passive exercise to my mind the resistance is whole, complete, encompassing. Further, the inward pressure from the water, the extra effort to expand the lungs against the water pressure, and not being able to breath at all times, make it a much more intense workout than what non-swimmers might think.
I am excited. I see change, or death, coming. I am pushing every boundary. I am taking what my mother started with her visit and trying to figure how to launch myself with it. Having a homier home, a clean home, and keeping up with it, is just the beginning. I see, even at this humble pace, I have to be so careful though. Gah! Hope, faith, charity. Starts at home, you know. All things do. But too, you can't give what you don't have. There is that. I am working on the bars of my cage, perhaps I have more treasure to share if I can just get out.
Good day.
I took part of a semester of Latin way back.
ReplyDeleteDuco ducis ducit
ducimus ducibus ducut
That's about all I remember--conjugating some verb or another. I dropped the course before the mid-term.
pardon... change the last two to "ducitis, ducunt"
ReplyDeleteGaah! What useless knowledge follows me across the decades!
Without a surety of pronunciation, since it is well and truly dead, it would be difficult to find incentive to learn Latin. Even with my religious calling to it, I... We will see. What makes it worse is that I know if I get this down, then I have to move on to Hebrew.
ReplyDeleteYiddish I could probably do easily, being relatively similar to German, but Hebrew? All to re-invent the wheel by going back and reading the ancient biblical writings as they originally were presented, or more closely. Then again, so much has changed, I would still have to be guided through the material, read the historical changes and understand those, plus understand that even then, some of the ancient words have lost their meaning, or their meanings were lost, that is.
Hmm, ducimus ducitis ducunt? Sounds... naughty. Imma look that up. Of course, even if it were bad, who would I tell? Mind clutter, you say? Isn't that, though, what most of what is in the mind? Really? It's like the brain gives us 3-5% for conscious use and uses the rest for it's own purposes. Probably in their creating then playing games, just like I do.