It's... not going to happen today.

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Which, as it turns out, is fine.  The weekend was simply too short this time.  However, there is room, and reason, to move the goal.  I need to be to the butcher shop tomorrow to set up the hog cuts and smoking orders.  Plus, today I would have missed Mass, while tomorrow I might make it.  And swimming on Monday or Tuesday, then Friday, makes little real difference.  I just don't have anything in the boiler this morning, not enough to turn the cogs and gears.  Today will be more of a day of rest, too.  Research regarding hog butchering did not go forward, neither did figuring out what I need to get, and stock, regarding the snow blower.  Oh, one thing the neighbor did figure out is that the cord from the handle that engages the blower was not tight.  A bit of tightening on that has massively increased the capacity of the machine to shoot the snow, meaning Pam may not be needed for the snow shoot after all.

Oh, even if the rest of the week was a wash, and while that would be disappointing, I would not be greatly disturbed.  I would be more vigilant and fretful about next week, perhaps.  The thing is, I am doing a ton better, using every measure available, than I have ever done.  I would compare this to not this, but the summer before last, as being the two best periods I have had since being ill.  The difference that makes this period better?  It is right dab-smack in the middle of one of the coldest winters I have known in Utah, and it might be closing on one of the coldest all told.  This is a typical, for me, hibernation period.  I simply don't do things in winter.  Usually, closing up shop happens with or without my consent, sometimes without me even realizing it has happened... until the spring thaw.  Here I am, putting up a wall coat rack, setting up a seedling center, planning a trip to Burning Man, organizing some things in my home, taking my medications about as good or better than ever, and exercising to the point I have to figure out how to loosen up to do more at points!  My blood pressure is superior with my high points being lower than my lowest points for the last 15 years, my weight is steady as a rock, I eat better with a little help, and I am reading, and the heavy stuff.  Heck, considering just my health condition should have killed me or caused a heart attack, stroke, or other things, for decades but didn't, if longevity is your measure, I'm so far ahead of that game the rest is just insult on injury to the notion of death as punishment... or whatever.

That said, it is true that I am not living a full healthy normal(tm) life.  I literally, can't, yet, be busy my whole day.  My day consists of resting, then maybe some more resting, perhaps a nap, then 20 minutes to an hour of work, then resting, and a bit more resting to make sure, then some other task.  I still don't have much option.  I can, and have, worked in a minor way, for several hours at a time.  But that is rare and takes a toll.  Swimming, while exercise and serious exercise since I do hit it as hard as I can, takes most of my day and even week.  At this point though, it beats... more resting.  Everything, however, has to be weighed on it's own merits.  And my life up to beginning heart medication compared to my life after it is the difference between sitting and a slow jog?  Summit like that.  I'll take it, if I am looking to be doing marathons at the pace I am now doing sprints!  It could happen, it really could.

So, a day off just isn't going to plug up my pipes or cause me troubles.  And I will still be doing things, more of the contemplative than active, as St. Aquinas might put it.  The sun just broke through.  Perhaps St. Aquinas is not the only one smiling on my efforts?  Later.