.
.
Oh, who knows. My mind is playing with things. Not so darkly though not without touching on some of that. My gardens all have areas of shadow.
The notion of the mask, the dance, the mystery, the music.
Bits of the truth behind the want of escape.
Shall we?
A hope that the mask may not be all, or even the best, of what we are. Life happens so quickly. Our passions can seem too strong, and can lead us astray. While we cannot undo the past we can choose the future, perhaps.
No idea why the notions, nor is angst what is filling these sails. Just a flirt with the fanciful portions of reality, told as a story for the eyes and ears.
Good night.
Came across your post below someplace where you are still not on your full dose of meds. ..ugh..
ReplyDeleteMeds can be a mixed blessing. I developed an allergy to a bp medicine I had been on for years. Had my first epi pen stuck in my leg on Friday. My bp that morning? 120 over 72.. Sometimes one just can't win for loosing.
Anyway, Doom.... Be well, okay?
ps: love the music..
@Foam --- I had to use epipens when my arthritis infusion treatments were in Limbo due to some insurance confusion. I kept thinking of the suicide pills handed out in "On the Beach".
ReplyDelete@Doom --- I have an appreciation for both shadows and deep waters. Sometimes the sun can reveal far too much.
Michael,
ReplyDeleteOuch! And ouch again! Now, that is a movie I haven't seen.
I should remedy that.
foam,
ReplyDeleteI just want to shout for you! To get to such a good bp, finally, only to have it all fall apart, and then have what is going to allow you to survive the failure wound? Such lovely, hardy, and yet fragile and susceptible creatures we are.
Still, I hope you can have some of the dark humor I have about it, and let it tickle your heart, even if just a bit?
Michael,
Indeed it can. Look, even God knows, no matter our intent, His face would slay us, and it is of only truth, good, and the holy. We are not yet ready for the fullness, not in life, or this one. As for depth? We are called to it. Not just by faith, but by reason, through our life spirit, in our attempts to do material good.
I understand that many can't, and almost as many won't, climb that descending ladder of ascension. It does hurt. Those are the true conservatives, the ones who would kill to keep anything from changing, knowing they are aging, the world is as well. Everything is different every nano second, even if nothing else changed, time has progressed inescapably. That they can't stop anything drives them to forms of insanity, murderous insanity more often then not.
Faith, as a very minor aspect but which could be huge for some (and at one time, even me), allows a... salve... for that particular pain.
So... dig deep, deep as you can. I think my physical pains, and the serious measure of faith gifted to me in finality, has allowed me to go where others won't, possibly can't. I suspect you understand. It is why what I write often turns people off. The truth does hurt.
Oh, and I still think it is funny what you suggested about having a loud family, so as to find writing. I am not loud. Gregarious, no doubt, verbose as well, one might even say garrulous. But I am too tied, and disinterested in being, loud. So, speaking and writing in volumes is... dear to my heart. Brothers of another mother, and father too, but... *grins*
foam,
ReplyDeleteI had hoped you would enjoy the music! You have a seriously interesting capacity to go into music where many can't or won't. You literally amaze me. I can't always go that far, with others, or even always with my past stuff. You've got some... thick skin on your soul. Not calloused I think, just... tough. Fearless, too, comes to mind.
I have an eclectic taste in music, Doom. :-)
ReplyDeleteI know you pick your music and accompanying videos to reflect something you are going through at the time.
@foam --- the original novel for "On the Beach" by Nevil Shute packs quite a wallop and, if you're in a mood to read, I'd recommend it. If, on the other hand, you want to see the film, I'd suggest the 1959 version with Gregory Peck and Ava Gardner.
ReplyDelete@Doom --- good comments. God loves us, but mortal flesh cannot openly face even the benevolence of His overwhelming radiance. Once we had embraced sin we lost that part which we possessed in the Garden.
I often comment to people that Perfection is the sole province of God. All we can do is work towards it, and it's by such effort that we achieve Grace.
Pain reduces me, makes me insignificant, and reminds me that I am diminished in the sight of God. I cannot totally conquer my pains, but I can work in spite of them.
You haven't experienced cacophony until you've been at a holiday celebration with my folks. Now it's also the nephews, nieces, grandchildren and great-grandchildren getting into the act. My little sister clearly has the edge in terms of a voice which carries over the din.
As for myself I recall the lines from the old poem: "It is the pen that gives immortality to men".
foam,
ReplyDeleteI thought I did, until I started exploring, looking for musical notes to display the inner turmoil, or joy, bedazzlement, or such. It has stretched my initial anemic tastes. But apparently that taste still doesn't compare to yours. Well, and I do have some pet peeves that would be considered profoundly politically incorrect, despite them being purely a matter of taste, or distaste. Then add on the things political and that suffering, sometimes, is better left forgotten.
Michael,
Diminished, but loved as we are, and fully. Danged Fathers. :p
My brother's home is much like you describe, though without the numbers even on holidays. We had few cousins, and little connection, growing up. We are unto ourselves. Even so, his, and more your, home... scares me! I like quiet. My cats are, likewise, quiet. Though should I find a woman, I am quite sure... that will end.
I have a way, beside writing, of... bringing... the tongue to action in others. Most especially women. A talent that makes my writing seem mild. Though it might be seen in my writing, nothing like the words with just the right twist of the head and sniffle of the nose to... light fires. :) Actually, from some of the things I have read, you don't need visuals.