Yes, awake and alive.

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Something is coming back, and at speed.  Is there a reason or is it just something that happens as I surface?  I don't know but it is profoundly powerful.  It is as good as I have ever been since becoming better these last few years, with room for much more.  There is almost real life, and corporeal power, just a stone's throw away.  I don't know if I will reach it this time, but I am beginning to reach for it even now.  It is something I fear.

Why fear?  Have you ever considered what we are programmed to do?  Of all the big, or little, things, our minds, hearts, and souls or spirits, that of man, nephilim, even those bearing the mark of Cain, are meant to find the tools which they use, then use them.  It is what we do.  It is a call that underwrites all of our other motives and inspirations.  My choice of tools, and call to action, is war.  If health returned, I could, as well, become an engineer, a husband and father, even a bit of a farmer on the smaller scale.  All of these would be secondary, and would become integrated into my warrior's nature, which is primary.  It is what I do, it is tools for this that I seek, and find.  A powerful body means a readiness for war.  But does readiness mean it is time?  That is what I fear.



There are other things to fear as I... get stronger.  Her. 

Later.