Good bloody morning.

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No anger, just a serious bit of pain.  A small pile of anacin, right after medicines, I am hoping, will bring some peace to my shoulder, neck, and headache pains.  Oh, I like those, some days.  Not this particular day.  I'm not in the mood.  Usually those will fade with darkness as the day moves along.  Not today, I can tell, without a little help.  Even pain killers are merely going to sooth, not remedy.  I only missed, in the end, a single day of medication, if... I bundled to catch up an half day.  But I missed two days of insulin.  I'm not sure why it is this brutal.  I've missed, when on higher doses, for a week or two before hitting this kind of crescendo of pain.  This feels like that sort of pain set.  Hey, missing medicines, of both types, kills some people, I shouldn't complain.  Feels like I've been sapped with a blackjack.  Thing is, I know that won't do it.  I've been punched, blackjacked, and batoned in the back of the head by pros, to no good effect (for them), or even a headache the next day.  By the way, don't do that.  The last guy ended up in the hospital for a week, and I was going as easy on him as I could.  I knew he was just a dumb putz, tried not to put the hurt on him.  Would have killed him otherwise.

Right now, however, I feel as if a spike was driven into the base of my skull.  That may be why I am burning, too.  But that doesn't make sense, exactly.  I've been eating right, low carb, right amounts, mostly.  I just can't figure this out.  It happens.  It was, I think, in the 30's last night while out a bit.  I could not cool down.  I was burning up.  Got home, got everything in, stripped to a t and shorts, turned the thermo down to 66.  I'm still cooking this morning.  Feet and hands are a bit cool, but the rest of me is roasting.  Just a wee bit of nausea too.  If that is a new development.  Ugh.

No snow, but it is raining, I think.  I am almost sure I heard rain on the roof last night.  I don't know whether to wish for snow or not.  You never know how much will arrive, or how long the system will stay.  I do like the look of snow, so long as it doesn't arrive by the foot, or three, and then drop several times a week for a month or two.  That gets old fast.  A snowblower is still a good lot of work, it is merely less than a shovel... unless all hands are on deck.  Four shovels beat one snowblower, at least with what I need to clear.  Got to admit though, if I am ever a dad, it will be done with shovels.  A new friend showed me the light on that topic.

Hmm, today?  I am not sure.  I will attempt to not let this life gunk slow me down too much.  I don't know.  I did buy enough stuff to begin making quiche.  I also purchased an appliance cart.  I don't know if this is the cart I want, and I have some time to return it.  I want to try it on my steps, bringing the old water heater up, and see if my friend still needs some help with it.  If it passes muster, I'll keep it.  If not, I'll return it and go bigger and better, or different.  So many choices, many of which aren't worth it, or too specialized or weak.  Never easy, is it.  Which... for now... I actually like.  It's not always in success, but effort, that gratification can be found.  Those who find a way to only find gratification, to my mind, are often the most lost.  They can't handle reality.  I know from experimentation on a grand scale that there is no way to pure success.  That is an illusion only abiding evil can create.  That path leads to monsterhood.  So... a call, perhaps some baking and cooking, and a few other things... but not quite yet.  Coffee!  That might help with the headache too.  And pulling out of the slump.  Later.