No sleep, not yet.

.
.
Hush, now.  I tried.  I went in and... waited.  I don't know how long.  Not exactly sure when, though I think it was around 2:00.  Sleep just can't be forced.  Actually, I think the blockage was working out later.  It takes my body, even from the light sets I am doing, a while to come down.  If I force the breaker closed, juice runs, then the machine is charged and just has to run down.  I probably shouldn't do more strenuous exercise after 15:00 or so.  I'm now in one of those... fogs.  Not asleep, not awake.  I know I won't wake and yet sleep seems so far off.  On the good side, there is sun!  On the bad side, just the bits of it that are getting in through the sun-beater curtains is a bit too much.  Still, I'll enjoy the sun as I may.

I did call my mother today.  I had meant to call my brother, just... well...  Anyway.  He lives near enough the ground zero of an area that is having problems.  They are okay, so far.  I'll keep them, and those not so fortunate, in prayers.  Though the reason I called was to see if she was still on e-cigs.  She is, has been since... February... I think she said.  I am glad for her, for a number of reasons.  It is as good as it will get.  She has had a burn stick in her hand longer than most people have been alive.  I am surprised, pleased, even impressed, that she has gotten this far.  Has to watch her food, she says.  Boy, don't we all?  Then again, I've quite tobacco before, I know that added weight to hunger.  For me, I suspect she wouldn't like regular fire sticks anymore.  So, as soon as my supply is gone, assuming the patches arrive, I'll be quitting.

The only caveat is, if my teeth start falling out, I'm going right back to tobacco.  Too many ex-chewers quit and then loose teeth and their mouth falls apart.  If my teeth give me fits, I'll go back.  I am brushing twice a day, flossing at night, and using various mouthwashes as well, plus picking clean after every meal.  Sometimes just for something else to do.  Once I quit, I may try a number of home-remedy teeth whitening schticks.  I don't want them truly white though.  That isn't natural, if you have ever seen it.  Usually on someone with a tan, too.  Should be your clue right there.  I've been cutting coffee and tea, trying to go with about six cups a day (down from two pots of twelve cups each, mind you).  But that is as far as I will get with that, pretty much.

I told her I'd be a different man when she saw me next.  I've got until mid-fall to follow through.  An uncle may be there.  The last time he saw me I weighed 350, seventy to eight more than I weigh now.  I don't seem to be losing an ounce.  I'm a bit surprised I haven't gained actually.  I can tell by belts, pants, and shirts, though, that the weight is definitely being reconfigured.  I still have a belly, just not even enough of one to make a true Santa without a pillow.  Legs and arms are getting bigger, stomach is getting smaller, hopefully I really will be a different man if I can keep it up.

Sleep blogging.  Great.  Dream-thinking-writing.  I'm going to try to crash.  Maybe read the butcher book, then crash?  Look it over as the lights dim, anyway.  Nah, won't give me nightmares.  Just food.  Might make me hungry though.  Hmm... I am already hungry.  I'll much some eggs and maybe an orange, then call it a day... or whatever you call it when you sleep shortly after the sun comes up.  I just don't know that term.  Good... day... night.