Today?

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Well, I don't know.  I put the dream section separate, because... well... it's a serious downer.  It is what it is, and what will be will be.  But, for now, I am where I am, facing the direction I am going, and I'll keep this journal entry on that track.  Didn't want to taint this meat of effort and hope with the bile of those truths, understandings.

I can't say today is a great day.  I worked a bit Saturday, and Sunday was busier than it should have been.  So getting going, even today, is...  It probably won't happen to a greater extent.  As I used to stretch my sleep or wake cycles into days, I am stretching my week into weeks.  Sometimes it just happens.  Some people can do it.  I end up paying a price, a steep one.  And so it is.  Yesterday was off, today will be as well, most likely.  I'd like to hit normal weekend things though, sort of as I did yesterday.

Finishing some dishes, a meal or two, but coffee as I wake.  A fresh pot was made ready last night, and loaded this morning.  It's good that it's not a weekend.  I need to order medicine, some of it.  I ordered some Monday, through the automated system, and will try again with another medicine today.  Sometimes that seems to go through, sometimes not so much.  And, while it is, technically, a weekend, I would still like to hit the weights.  It's been a while, just so busy with the cave.  When I get on a track it is sometimes difficult to get off it.  Having ten pounders in stock is great.  I'll probably up the dumbbells and definitely the curl bar, though I'll leave the barbell alone for now.  I like to increase in parts, almost never whole, unless I hit that magic button from time to time, and can raise everything, all at once, and sometimes in groups for a while.  I'm not there yet.  I know it when I see it.

Grain mush and sprouts for breakfast, after some coffee soothes jangled nerve and tight muscle.  Yeah, it can do that.  I have been reviewing other sorts of sprouts.  Some charge way too much, others are just goofy (charging less for organic than inorganic?  Really?), so I'm looking around carefully.  Local prices are okay, but not optimal.  And selection isn't great (couldn't find mustard or radish, except in mixes I didn't really like).  Though there is a new store in town that might have more of a selection.  Daikon radishes, a Japanese thing I think, are great, that is another sort of sprout that might have some interesting flavor.  I might try the lentils I have, for sprouting.  I have a LOT of lentils.  When I ordered, I didn't realize, exactly, just how much was coming.  No loss there, in my view, as long as they last stored this way.  Cracked, or sprouted, wheat is okay too, though more a think for cooking or baking, as I see it.  Hmm... never did get a grain mill.  Money... gotta wait for that to build back up though.  Money, money, money, innit?  Or time, or effort.  When one thing isn't in the way, another is.  Oh, I could buy the machine, and easily enough.  I am just getting used to having a good little cushion (I do mean little, compared to a solid, real, saver).  But, it's what I have with where I am at.  Still, I want that cushion to be larger before buying.  Always little and big things on the list, always.

I made a small little purchase recently.  Included in the set is a book on butchering meat, game and tame.  I am sure there are limits to the book, but it will be a start before I am carving a moose, bear, beaver, goat, or caribou into dinner.  I have butchered a small deer, if I butchered the butchering.  But I did it without a book, minus help, and on my own as the first animal I have ever worked.  A blood mess.  But I did get enough good meat off to have processed into jerky and summer sausages.  Thirty pounds worth?  Something.  It was a small deer, and I missed or ruined almost as much as I got.  They probably had to toss some of the meat because of fur.  Still, it worked out.  I... just don't want to have to start at that point in the future.

Most of the drains seem to be faster.  The tub is not all that much faster though.  Or doesn't seem to be.  I'm thinking of getting a bath in today.  Lemon-lime salt soak?  Yeah.  I really like that one.  I'm out of the bigger jars, using them for salt soaks, sprouting, and losing one to droppage.  I'll be buying another stack or two of those the next time I am in town.  They hold 16 ounces, I believe, half quarts.  Is there another term for that size?  Cups and pints would be larger numeratored fractions, though there might be some old-timey term.  I don't know it.

Raining, again.  Cloudy.  Cool, but I have the thermo up.  Tired of being tired, with a sense of wet, and cold.  I can fix one of those.  I have been reading a good deal.  Not sure how many short stories I have burned through.  An half dozen?  A dozen, in the last three or four days?  It's sort of like speed dating.  Some don't get the full time.  Not interested in lesbian lifestyle, worse when they have a kid.  Poor kid.  Most of the stories are by the socially and culturally disaffected generations, but some are tolerable, some are junk, some are reasonable.  Even if I didn't come from the typical family, or other, it is the ideal.  The hope.  To be supported.  I'm surprised Vox put this in.  Most of it is good.  I guess, with a group of authors and publishing what it is, it is surprising to get a majority of even 'good-enough'.  And, like when I watched television, skipping the trash is the option.  Though, often, you can't tell if it is trash until you are into it a bit.

I have one more in this line of books, after this one is finished.  Then I don't know.  I'm not reading at the pace I had been, but I am going at a pretty good clip.  Sometimes I take a little breather between stories, sometimes I just try to shift perspective on the fly.  Either way, it slows down my reading.  I'm hoping I have a chunk of a book to hit next.  Though, when the book about butchering comes in, I am hoping to read it along with the sci-fi/fiction.  Had to do it in college, if I didn't care for it much.  As with food and working when not feeling like it, though, it really isn't about feelings.  Not real life, can't be.  That's what's wrong with my, and adjacent, generations.  Feelings, and living for those.

Later.