Taking it easy.

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Okay, two blood sugar tests so far.  One "last night" (early morning, perhaps 5:30 or so), then one this afternoon (which was... this afternoon... yeah, my sleep is off,  or was "last night").  One was after eating and drinking, the other was after ten to twelve hours of fasting, both were the same.  Yeah, I'm telling you, it's just odd.  I'll finish off the last of my treats.  Since they don't seem to be helping or hurting, and I've been without that for some very long time.  Going without treats, when the bod gets a taste of it, it sort of vetoes the intellect.  More so when the intellect doesn't seem to be able to prove it's point even in simple observational reviews.  Fasting, even starving, or eating right, or taking medicine... my numbers are either good or bad without having any relation to the others.  Which, as I suggested, probably means it's heart issues, not diabetes in actual fact.  It's just that the organs that control insulin aren't getting enough blood.  So that creates an indication of something that isn't really there, so treatments won't necessarily affect it.  Though they can help, maybe, which is why I bother.  The addictive properties of insulin though... perhaps with outside insulin coming in, my body... heart... just lets those organs hang.  So when I stop taking insulin I can really floor out quickly.  My heart doesn't notice quickly enough to get blood going back to the, what, kidneys?  Whatever.  Not until it is way too late.  Or maybe it can't pull them out of mothball status quickly enough.  Something like that.

I'll be getting to bed at a good time tonight.  From shortly to a few hours from now, I'll hit it and probably sleep well.  Ah, I also picked up my vitamins.  I try to keep about a three to six month supply of the various things I take.  That should be enough, if supply dies, to ween myself, stretching it all out to six months to a year.  I could increase the over-the-counter stuff as well.  I can't, completely, go without pharmaceuticals, but I might be able to patch with otc as I ween off even that.  Yeah, I'll survive.  I'll just suffer like having a limb chopped off every few days or weeks as I get over some things.  I just don't get to die.  If living with a bad heart is rather painful.  I might go back to the fog, of pain and confusion.  Though, knowing what I do, and that it isn't psychological, means I have something to work with, and there are otc's that, at the worst, might mitigate a bit to a lot.  I am impressed with some of the stuff.  If they cut me off of this stuff to, I'll have to go to it.  All I need to do is keep the numbers in some sort of order.

Gaming, today.  I may just boot the first of the dlc game content.  It's too much of just a pain.  That simply isn't fun, at least not at my age.  If kids want to stick their hands in blenders, let them.  It's just not my gig.  I may just go on to the second part of that game, or F.E.A.R 3.  Yeah, no, I've not played a lot of games I have shown in music videos.  Still, I knew the music and game or movie or whatever did fit, or I wouldn't have used them.  Odd how I almost magically find those things, then they lead me to the other things.  They fit the dreams, not the other way around.  It just amazes me to see some, much, of what I discuss, so well set out.  Anyway.... Later or good night.