Better, part try?

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I don't speak a trace of French or even other romantic languages anymore.  At least it wasn't part doe.  Never mind.

I am feeling better.  Still a bit tight, all around, weary as well, if better in all ways, again.  I will be awake until I am not.  I will read, watch music or movie vids, or even do little tasks here and there, as things work out.  I simply won't push this way or that.  I won't dig, aim, or try.  I just don't have it in me to do so.  Batteries have to recharge before I can even begin thinking about thinking about things.  Then, of course, I have to... well... think about things, formulate a plan, create order, provide direction, then wait for the window of opportunity to appear.  Even then, a window of opportunity is not a guarantee of action.

Have you ever met someone of "the faith" who... pretty much didn't believe... pretty much anything?  Ah, right, yeah... the flood?  Oh, well, just a story.  Virgin birth?  Just an allusion.  Allusion?  Something.  Sin?  Well, yeah, but not really.  Just take even literal things all as stories of morality, and then try to play nice.  They seem to laugh off much.  And, yet, when they find you do believe?  They fear YOU?  Really?  How does that work?  Don't fear God, or sin, or hell, but fear someone who believes in that?

Seems the pope is like that.  You know... that doesn't work out.  There is a dissonance there that absolutely doesn't make sense.  I can't help.  Free choice.  I am pretty sure that if they say those things are false, and fear me or priests who also believe, that they know, deep down, but are hiding from it.  For... any of a number of reasons.  But they know.  They just want to avoid knowing.  At one time I would have pursued, a bit.  Now?  I just let them go there way.  Just by being present in how I understand truth I have done all I may for them.  I'll check.  If I am no longer welcome I will find another place for that need.  It isn't a problem for me, I think it is for some.  So be it, if necessary.

Well... on to something or other.  Wow... just 22:00?  Weird.  I am really out of sorts.  Time and sleep and such just isn't... my internal clock is just not keeping up.  Later or good night, definitely good evening.