Oh, right.

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I didn't go down until... after I called my mother.  I meant to call yesterday.  I was in recovery, and just... it didn't happen.  I was up until 08:23, and through the call.  I did chores first.  It helps sleep with a clear conscience when the animals are tended, cats too.  They aren't animal animals, but... like me, at times, it's... what, if not who, we are?  Somewhere in there.

I woke around 13:30?  I think so.  In good shape, not too tired, exhausted, and pain seems to have passed, so I got up.  Not getting to a lot, yet, but... trending that way?  Maybe.  It is 78 outside?  I never thought I would be glad to see it that warm.  Then again, even with the machine on, and all, it is only 74 here near the machine, and probably cooler in the main of the room, definitely cooler in the rest of the house... more like 70 out that way.

A fatted coffee.  And, while I reset waterers, I didn't put them up.  I will get that done, then do dishes.  I should be able to wash and rinse those, then get them out to air dry.  As well, get trash bagged, collected, and out.  As with recycling.  I think I will, almost certainly.

I would like something to eat, but don't have anything thawed.  Could go to town, but want a shower first, and maybe a shave.  Though... I really don't want to go to town.  Tomorrow, or sometime early this week.  For shopping, and taxes.  I will have to push to get out, but being showered, shaven, and ready otherwise will help.  Clean clothes adds confidence.  It's a brutal world out there.

I am a bit worried about my mother.  She was really pushing, to get out.  But she seems... confused, tired, inactive.  They did push her, toward the end.  But that was necessary, to make sure she was, possibly, capable to being released.  I hope she understands, one more fail, fall, illness, or else, and in such a short order, they won't let her go next time.  At least, if it happens in the next year or two.  And her guy can't care for her.  It has been the other way around for a long time.  He needs care at least as much as she does.

All I can do is check in, pray, and have some hope and faith.  I don't have much say, either way.  And, while I could take her in, I can't take an invalid in.  She has to at least handle her own affairs.  I could drive her.  I can help her with things, to a degree.  But, really, I'm in probably worse shape than her friend.  What was it?  It's never sad until it ends, then everything is sad?  Well, closing shops is sad, the process.  Everyone I know is beyond our seeming end.  I don't think anyone really cares.  I get it, things to do, places to go, money to make, loves and lovers to find.  I... was there, myself, once.  I... understand.  It works until it doesn't.  Amen.

Still, I am hoping to dig in today.  Sweep the bathroom first, then begin on dishes.  Oh, and putting waterers in their packs.  It really should be easy.  I have been trying to sit to work, but may try kneepads and see if that is easier, quicker.  So much to do, but I am so ahead in the bathroom.  I have cleaned it before, but never to the quick.  This is really clean.  Grout, near the tub faucet, could use an update.  It looks ugly.  But it is clean.  The tub?  A bit ugly, but again, clean... clean as I know how to get it.  *sigh*

I will need food before long, and sardines or kippers won't do it.  Not sure what I have in there, will have to look.  Hmm, might pull meats, as suggested, to thaw.  Though that will take a while.  Bleh.  I'll get to something after a quick roust around the internet.  Good afternoon and day.

Oh, hey?  A song which comes around from time to time.  It... reminds me of what I have lost, but what I have enjoyed too.  Bittersweet?  I think that would be it.  Whether you have truly loved one, or dozens, or scores... you... if you have truly loved some or all of those?  When it is over, you know you knew something special.  Someone special.  At least, I hope so.  Even as a cad, I did my best to do my best.  

You will always miss what you had?  Sex?  A part of it, less than I once thought, if a disproportionately large part for such a small aspect?  Something.  Still, it certainly wasn't all sex.  Just being with a woman, even when you... don't like her... at a moment.  Yes.  I... miss that.  But, hey, I... have had some wonderful loves.  Bittersweet, without a doubt.

I haven't been able to listen to music, much, lately.  Just... haven't.  Try.  It just doesn't... captured me.  Lately.  Well, this one reminded me to listen, for a bit.