Very pleasant.

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Sleep, sometimes, is about perfect.  I might not have much control over when I sleep, these days... or since I became ill to be honest.  But there have been times when sleep did me no good.  Oh, I still wake tired.  But not blindingly exhausted.  I used to wake, gasping for air, and that never improved.  I had learned, somewhere, how to survive death.  So, was able to live through those times.  Pushed to the absolute limits, I was able to live, just... live.

Even now, I plan for a future that probably can't be.  From purchasing camping gear to buying things to fix up the house to various other things.  I buy as if, somehow, tomorrow I will get up and get going.  I can't stop trying, hoping.  Even though, with medicine on target, going down rightly, and the temp being about as perfect as I could want it, I can barely stand at any given moment, or sleep or be awake as I would will it.

I was curious about what heats the upstairs the most.  So, I have been tracking it.  Last night was the last bit of data I sought.  When I dream, that is when I heat the place the most.  I can raise the temperature, up there, between three and four degrees.  My skin has a sheen of heat, when I wake from a dream.

Nothing fancy, last night.  I had moved to an asian nation.  And found a wife, an American woman, living over there.  We lived out in the wilds, a bit.  Without electricity, a bamboo two level little thing, near a river.  Some number of children.  We spoke the language, lived like and with the natives.

Not sure that is quite my gig.  But, in the dream, the people were happy enough.  And, anyone who can have children, and those children can be fed, clean, clothed, and educated... life is going to be good.  Difficult?  Try without those things.  Soon or late, being without children will destroy you.

Oh, and before that, dreams of being kidney punched, even shivved in those areas.  I survived.  Initially it was being done by ignorants, who where being guided by one who knew.  After handling the fools, I found my way to instigator.  His nature made it so that he could not be saved.  Some of his henchmen, too, could not be spared.

I made a blood mess of those who would not yield their evil.  I wasn't the only one they were attacking.  And, they were doing it without cause.  The kidney punches should have killed me, they definitely killed others.  The shivs should have for certain.  I just wasn't in the mood to die, so didn't.

I watched those who were spared, closely.  Any return to predatory behavior would be their end.  I did wake with my kidneys sore.  That is the first time they have been sore, on waking, in a long time.  Still very lightly sore.  Blood sugar is 201.  Maybe that is it?  Dunno.  Yes, I know why.  I just... had a few mints.  Thought I needed them.  Must have been wrong.  Bleh.  Later.