Supper was good.

.

.

But that was that.  I had thought today was supposed to start out with sunshine.  It may get there.  For now it is foggy.  Thick fog.  Perhaps 150 yard visibility.  But, if there isn't a thick layer of clouds up there, the sun often burns fog off, and usually fairly quickly.  I just don't know if there are clouds up there or not.  It is 53 out there this morning.  Last I checked.  And 73 here near the computer.

I did get the various burger put up, stored in the fridge.  I would hate to waste it.  Already lost the chicken.  I'll have more taco salad, then, in the near future, make beef, rice, and mushroom... or spaghetti... using the keto alternatives.  Those really aren't bad, I just couldn't find them right off this evening.

Well... on to bed.  Oh... another day dream.  I got shot like... fourteen times.  Hurt, the pain followed me back.  No, I... didn't die.  I just don't get to die, even in my dreams it seems.  Still, I'm good with whichever way it goes.  Pain?  Sometimes I do think it's all that I have left.  Not to endure, but all that keeps me here, and as real as I can be.  Not a note of dissatisfaction, just a realization.  I'm... good with it, really, finally.  Actually, it's sort of funny, in some odd way.  Not even a completely dark way.  When you move past yourself enough to be mostly beyond pain?  Mostly?  Things look different.  Some might call it insanity, I call that... immaturity.  Pain avoidance, is like work avoidance, or commitment avoidance.  Not that seeking pain is better, but fearing it?  Avoiding it at all cost?  Immature.  It's the price of life.

No shower, no dishes, no laundry, dragging ass, barely moving, but at least I had some better food today.  Amen.  Goodnight.