Time is slipping.

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There is a song with that... as the title, or main thread?  No one likes to lose time, or even spend it rashly.  The truth is, our wills have nothing to do with time. Then again, for me, while time can seem to slip, it feels more like I have been here for thousands of years, just in this one lifetime.  When you start out a thirty five year journey seeking death, but being denied, time... is wretchedly slow.

I have learned not to worry about time, only try to be ready to manage things in time, as they arrive.  I can't do much else.  At least I no longer feel the need to seek death, though most would in my shoes.  A gift, a grace, to carry my (and relatively insignificant) cross?  Okay.

Blustery, but more wet than snowing.  Mostly.  Usually.  It's like a woman on the edge of a big decision, right before she's made it.  And I'm not sure she is going to make her mind up.  Snot, and tears, and rants, not at anyone, just... a pleasure to watch from a warm, safe, comfortable distance.  I'll bet there are boobs, in the clouds, and more, if one looks with the right eye.  Certainly not the left eye.

I did call my mother, this morning, before going on to bed.  Just checking.  She is getting out today.  For some very strange reason, they are having a Christmas bazaar?  Some such.  She was just getting ready to go.  Didn't want to keep her from preps, so just spoke a bit.  Wished her well.  She sounds to be doing better.

And dairy arrived, while I was sleeping.  Prices are up, again.  But... that... wasn't completely unforeseen.  He has no choice.  These things may end up killing small businesses.  Has killed many already.  I would just stop with kefir and such, go back to drinking tea, and let that be that.  There is a price beyond my ability to pay.  Though, honestly, stores are just as expensive, mostly.  Do without rather than do with less, I guess.

I wasn't down until after 08:00?  Right.  Or I wouldn't have called.  It is an hour later there, so...  Up at 14:30ish.  I was told most of the last of the packages would be arriving today, but I don't think so.  I'll check, later.  Not sure why they do that, since they usually don't deliver on Saturdays.  No great worries, though it had looked like some hard candies were due in.  Which would be good to have on hand.

Blood sugar is good, at 137 this morning.  I won't take any fast acting until or unless I eat a bigger meal.  A fatted coffee, shortly.  Resetting kefir, but not enough to draw for a glass today.  Probably not until Monday, and then lightly.  All good, getting to things.  Did get a shower in last night, and needed it desperately.  Now to get back with else.  Sassy has been fed and her litter tended.  By keeping up daily?  Her single, preferred, pan, has lasted two months.  I clean it, often, twice a day.  Missing a day, or two, once or twice a month.  And it stays in excellent shape.  It is amazing how much Sam... was going and else.  And eating.  She was eating to live.  She is at peace.

Later.