Yesterday was rough.

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I stayed up to the afternoon, late afternoon.  At least 18:00 before finishing?  19:00?  I got a shower in, put up much of what had been washed, save  a few of those containers.  I want to get spices for those, hot spices.  Store them in airtight containers, of glass.  More fragile, but more lasting.  Get the spices out of the plastics.  Always plastics, we end up eating that.

Then to town, and to the store.  A lot of meat was purchased, at least twenty five packages, at two pounds per.  As well, a few other items.  They aren't doing larger salads, and are charging a lot more for what they are providing... probably triple the cost.  May have to attempt to put my own salads together.  Though, perhaps there is no saving to be had?

While at the store.  I saw them.  Attractive women.  No, not models, or glam girls, but the type I really like.  Next door girls, women really.  I... see one, once in a while.  I look, also, for flaws.  Keeps... interest at bay.  I work very diligently at keeping from getting an erection.  I am powerful, in these ways.

But, yesterday?  There were four, or five?  Maybe six.  I... tried to shut them out.  Tried to ignore.  Rolled my eyes a few times, to... focus, resist.  And it was working, until a few of them noticed me!  I... try to hide behind being ugly, old, fat.  I put out signals that I am not worthy, or interesting.  

I am powerful, of the mind.  It usually works.  But, not today.  For... whatever reason, a few of them... saw me as I saw them.  And, were as terrified as I was.  We... ran from one another, only to keep running into each other.  If it wasn't so sad, in some ways, it was certainly deliciously comic.  Ever chased a rabbit, only to have it circle around to you?  Right.  Now, imagine two rabbits, running from each other, nearly running into each other in ever diminishing circles of "run away".  Right, right.

The look of a fine woman, no makeup, just natural beauty.  But flush with... something.  Ten, fifteen, twenty years younger.  But blooming.  Ready.  Oh my Lord, God knew what He was doing.  I kept from having an erection, if... I don't think it quite mattered.  Wherever the blood went, it wasn't in my brain any longer.

I haven't been able to cool the blood since.  Yes, I... do like them, still.  I thought I had... escaped.  No, it's just that so many women are about as interesting as cardboard, or worse.  Tats, scarification, fat, too much make-up but without any chemical... trace?  Most women are of little or no interest.  I can see where I... make a mistake, think I am done with women.  Not.  No.  Not at all.  But, I will hide.  Wow.

And, I thought I could cover my tracks, hide my existence, disable their interest.  Nope, not the right ones.  Fuggetaboutit.  What a day!  I can't say... I was disappointed, unhappy, or else.  Just... surprised.  Yea, if I find the right one, I might well hop on that train.  Thankfully, I suppose, that will never happen.  Introductions almost never work.  And, every woman I have sort of found enough interest in... approaching... lightly?  Ends up being married, even if she is interested too.  Ugh.  Still, nice to know there is still... some magic out there.

It'll take me a week to get that beautiful stank out of my system.  Damn, but they... are wondrous creatures.  Damn.