Yea, well?

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.

Not much.  Blood sugar was 73 last time I checked it.  I'll check it in about an hour, see if food might be needed again.  Or something.  After that reading, I had three of those... crackers.  Cream cheese and some deli meat on top.  Will find out shortly if they create an insulin spike.  I definitely don't want to go to bed with a blood sugar in the 70s.  I am not sure about the 80s, either.  Though I may risk it in the 80s.  As blood sugar often, for me, goes up in the morning.  Or whatever passes for my morning.  But the 70s are too close to trouble.

The crackers are rather good.  I tried them without anything on them.  They have a mildly sweat, if naturally sweet, flavor.  If you have had rice puffs, or such, imagine a rye puff?  Something in that neighborhood.  And these are 13 carbs per three crackers.  There are other varieties which are 11 for two, for example... and among several types.  I am hoping these work out.  Nothing fancy, but as for carriers, or even crouton replacements, perhaps even crackers in soup, these may really work well.  I may try one as a crouton on a tuna salad if blood sugar is still a bit low.

The strange thing is, I dosed rather lightly, and only once.  I had two meals and a snack of an ounce of brazil nuts.  I could say, plus a fatted coffee, but that was actually part of a meal.  Oh, and eyes are clearing up a great deal.  It's been off and on, but the last few days it has been much more on than off.  Not sure if that was the new medicine which was dropped, or blood sugar clearing up?  No, blood sugar has been controlled, while vision was blurry.  Pretty sure it was the canceled medicine.

I suppose I could feed the girls one more time.  If they beg.  I sort of wait for that, unless I know enough time has passed.  Sometimes they don't beg.  Actually, I sleep extra long at some point.  I won't get much done before sleep.  I turned up the heat, but just couldn't get warm today.  I really think that is part of it.  If, too, I don't think the cold is environmental... it's my body not keeping warm, for whatever reason.

Carbs, I know, will help keep the body warm, if it has a price.  I need to find low carb foods which help.  Tea can help, a bit, for a bit.  But whatever is wrong just doesn't even allow that to warm the body for long, or all that well.  And, I can't drink it fast enough.

My sweeteners don't help.  Monkfruit and erythritol, allulose (a new trial type), liquid stevia and sucralose (only allow two drops per day, usually, though occasionally a few extra drops for coffee or a second chia breakfast of such).  None of those offer a fast burning item, if the liquid sucralose will cause a blood sugar spike if used more than I suggest, sometimes).

Oddly, even potato doesn't help.  My body runs cold, now.  Good for the summer, not as good for the winter.  I need to figure out how to warm up!  I am wearing double layers, a long sleeve shirt, warm socks, something on the feet besides, and a winter cap.  Do I really need to wear a fleece jacket too?  Or a bathrobe around?  Meh, may have to try it.  I NEED to be warm!  Can't seem to get to work without something more than what I have.  May have to turn the furnace up a bit more, or for a bit in the "morning"?  On top of more clothes?  Maybe.

Oh... I did a blood draw a bit early.  Though that probably means more twenty minutes shy of two hours, than one as it might seem.  Still, the draw was doable at 116!  And, weekly average is running at 157.  Very good numbers.  And I can sleep with that.  I expect 'morning' numbers to be high.  But this, this is good.  That was, pretty much, a heavier, if keto, meal with no insulin.

I missed medicine again today.  I had thought I took it, but didn't.  When I went to take night meds, I realized the problem.  Too late to take both, so... again... night meds will be missed.  Won't risk doubling up this close.  If it were five hours, I might try it.  But not one or two.  Terrifyingly heavy, these meds, not to be trifled.

Yes, now I can go on to bed comfortable that I won't die, or struggle to get sugar in me.  Even thinking of that stuff... I hate loving sugar, but I really do.  The longer I am away from it, the more I want it... at least when I smell or think about it.  With tobacco, when I got away from it I was gladly away from it.  Then again, I... haven't really escaped sugar.  It is in almost everything, naturally occurring sometimes, if more often manufactured.  I wonder if even meats aren't getting sugar added somehow.  They mean to kill us.

Goodnight.  I'll put some prayers in.  For some of you ladies, that your life, music, and loves be good... from family to friends.  And that you gents are finding life interesting, and yourself able... even if just able to sleep well, think as you prefer, and perhaps enjoy a woman, or your woman.  Well, and for those who hate me?  I pray you figure out what I did ages ago... hate only hurts you.  It'll never hurt me, even, especially, if you use it to murder me.  Odd that, but true.  Goodnight, sleep well, dream as you prefer, and maybe see you on the other side.

Almost awake.

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Cool, but not cold out there.  Cool even in here.  Turned the furnace up, just a bit.  Doesn't seem to matter.  Still chilly.  The rabbits were good.  Food, of course.  But waterers were not completely down.  And, were running, not frozen.  I have sorted out the ones who drink more, and gotten them the larger waterers.  And, yes, it works well.  None go without, save perhaps for a very short time.

The girls have been fed, and I think I got their litter cleared.  I will check when I go out to make a coffee.  Just had breakfast, but feel the want of a bit more.  Perhaps coffee, fatted, might do.  Slow acting insulin was taken, along with fast acting with food.  If it drops too much, this time, I will separate the doses by at least a few hours.  Tricky, what all has to be done.  I suppose I suspect, I just became lazy tonight.

Ugh, nothing thawed.  I really need to keep up on that.  I need meat.  Perhaps not every night, but three packs, thawed, for the week.  Four, if one of them is just a couple of chops, or just a small pack of brats.  I will get something out, and thawing, tonight.  I suppose I can have a tuna salad, an ounce or two of nuts, and... something hot tea for tonight.  Well, and I do intend to try the keto crackers with cream cheese and deli meat.  With tea, again.  Gotta have something warm to hot with each meal, or it all shuts down in there, or at least I shut down.  Warmth, in winter, is as much as the protein, fats, and carbs.  Gotta have some heat.

Maybe some work tonight?  Recycling, and a few boxes?  Litter, a shower, and dishes started?  Who knows.  I do know I need to heat up!  Ugh.  Later.

Awake and roughly at it.

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Not sure when I woke.  Perhaps around... ah, I called my mother right as I woke.  That says 15:42.  An hour has passed.  I was looking around  on the internet, after the call.  Oh, and while I won't spend more, I had ordered things on the first.  Which showed up today?  They weren't scheduled to be delivered until Tuesday and Thursday.  Which is part of why I won't be shopping as much with them from now on.

Blood sugar was high, this "morning".  At 224 fasting, I just don't get it.  It was, I think, like 164 hours after my last meal, and with fast and slow acting insulin in on a timely manner last night.  Then again, I am taking the slow acting at the literal evening, not my 'morning' evening...  I mean I am taking it between 18:00 and 22:00, which is more like my morning, rather than taking it at my "night", which is around 6:00 to 8:00.  Still, that is how I try to do it.  Or I might end up overdosing, because my days and nights can get really slippery, and I can have two or three days in one day.  I need to stick it to a time, and stay with it, as close as possible.  It's a dangerous game I play, lethal or quite near it, with any of these meds, if I am not careful.  Lucky, so far.  But... just, mostly.  I think I have gotten a taste of death by jumbling meds a few times.  Ugh.

Their prices are part of it, adding taxes is part of it.  No, amazon has sort of doomed itself.  There will always be a place for amazon, for items which really can't be found locally.  But, from now on, not only will I look locally, but I will price check.  Sometimes it really is worth the wait, for a good price, on certain items.  Though I am guessing, amazon will begin losing a lot more.  Still, why the three day, given the late nature of the order, delivery?  Remember when it really was two days, not two weeks?  Or even a week?

Well, and buying less, overall, is good.  Actually, now, I need to go through much and... downsize.  Ugh.  Mostly what I bought was food items I think will work with keto.  A box of strange keto crackers, or keto-friendly.  Actually old-school stuff, with carb counts which work, and a price that seemed reasonable.  I had thought they would be tiny, but these are... sort of amazing.  I haven't tried one yet.  Should go good with everything from lox and cream cheese, to deli slices, and who knows what else.  

Can't eat a lot of them, but two to three... two Saltine sized... crackers, a few times a week, would be easily worked into my carb allotment.  Actually, that amount would only be about 11 to 13 carbs (depending on which type).  So I could use more, and more often, but the trick to keto isn't to do 20/30/50 carbs (whichever is your allowed, and works for you and ketosis), but to cut carbs out as completely as possible.  The maximum isn't actually the goal, it is merely the number you really want to stay under.  As well, variety.  Say, crackers on Tuesday and Thursday, cheese and deli on the other days?  Something like that.

Mother sounded good.  She had her guy bring in some furniture, just a stand really... to set up her Christmas decorations.  As well, she obtained wood oil, and shined that stand, her dresser, and the door to her room.  I... told you.  The woman won't go down.  While I might not die well, she just... won't quit trying to improve her lot.  I'd trade her, gladly.  But that isn't how it goes.

Chores, in a bit.  Then feeding the girls.  I may try some of those crackers as water heats for the rest of breakfast?  Nah, I'll have it with a "lunch".  I am excited to try them.  Even if they aren't the greatest, I will try to use them anyway.  I thought these were going to be tiny, AND, even in bulk, a small package.  Nope, These will take some work to even find a place to store them.  I really am pleased, especially given the carb count.

They make a "bread" like these, which I want to try next... after being amazed by these.  I don't need them to be tasty, I just want the utility.  I miss bread and crackers, or some equivalent.  And, while they say you can make them, I haven't had great success or satisfaction with what I have been able to produce.   If, true, I haven't tried everything possible.  Though, too, who wants to cook everything from scratch, keep up on it all, and... it... is overwhelming.  If I had a woman type, who could help, and wanted to cook and help with cleaning, on top of what I do, that would work.  But solo, on solo, on solo, on the house, laundry, cooking, dishes, etc?  I... simply can't do it.

Oh, best get on to setting up breakfast, then chores and the girls' food.  Later.

Nowhere, and... yet...

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Dinner, at least.  Plus the cats.  Chores earlier.  A few small things, plus trash out, and litter switched... the old going out with the trash.  Nothing fancy.  No boxes done, no dishes started, not even a shower taken.  Medicines in, for the second night in a row, rightly and all of them, including insulin... fast acting with food and slow acting... well... just sort of as a night thing, on it's time schedule.

Blood sugar is 168.  Not great.  I did dose.  But I ate a pretty carb heavy meal.  Beans and beef.  Part of it on lettuce, some of it just on a plate, with cheese and sour cream.  The thing is, I'm not sure how long ago I age.  It may have been just at, or under an hour.  Or two?  Gah, memory sucks tonight.  Even so, it's not too bad, given all the givens and possibles.  I am actually more worried about a crash, as it lowers, than having it a tad high.  For now.  That'll change as things settle.  Ugh.

The world isn't moving fast.  But it has... spun just enough to do some things.  Oh, and I remember not to spend a nickel more until bills are paid.  If I am not awake early enough today, I will get them on Monday.  But, again, no more money out until bills are paid.  It... keeps things in order.  Plus, I have to remember to keep money in the account for later bills, such as gas and electric.  

Electric did, finally, come down.  It really looks like they are two or three months behind.  Very strange, but I had stopped using ac's by late August, I think?  And even fans by shortly after that, if I only used those at night, and occasionally.  It wasn't until this last bill that the drop in electricity showed up?  Very strange.  I was worried that electricity had just jumped and wouldn't be going back to anything like what I remembered.

Of course gas will now go up?  Uhrm, maybe, a bit.  But I have it on autopay and averaged out.  It might go up a bit, as they are probably still charging more no matter demand or else.  Biden has unleashed these people to rob us.  As well as charging them more for everything government related and cutting access and else.  Weaponized.

Well... a bit more gaming, then on to bed.  Oh, I will hit litter one more time, to keep it fresh, tonight.  Maybe do waterers, and refresh the girls' water?  I can hope.  Goodnight, prayers, well wishes, and... that's about all folks.

Litter and trash.

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Not... all the trash.  All litter though, for now.  The girls will almost be happy.  Their litter and food good, now to change their water.  I should have enough, after refilling waterers, to get them a fresh pan of water.  Sam drinks so very much, that smaller amounts offered just don't work.

While boxes are a priority, trash was... there.  And looked to be an easy target.  And, if it isn't boxes, it is something, and done.  Now, whether I will get to boxes next, or the remnants of trash and recycling, I can't say.  That did wear me out a bit.  So a break.  Then... something.  Maybe something small, like waterers and the cat water next.

Still, I think I might get to a few bigger jobs tonight.  Success leads to success.  And I have been dreaming, the last few days, about getting the house cleaned up... a bit or more.  I'd like to see that dream come true.  Even if just in bits and parts over the next week.  I had been doing well, then medicine started and I haven't been able to do much since.

I am sure, if medicine can be arranged, and a few things checked, there is a possibility that I can do better for longer, do more.  I... it is almost beginning to possibly be a reality.  Not there, but it really might be closer.  I have never seen bp in this range.  Well, and I have noted that once blood pressure comes under control, diabetes is easier to manage.  It's either a twofer or neither.

Bills, tomorrow.  I won't buy or spend another nickel, until bills are paid.  I wait until the third though, to make sure they don't try to say I paid last month instead of this month, or other treachery.  Big companies hate us.  We are just money to them, like exotic dancers.  If you give them a dollar, then that is all you will ever be to them... a wallet.  And they hate you for having more in than what you offer.  Only, it's gotten worse.  This government helps them fleece us, weaponizes everything from big corp to the dollar to government involvements against us, for them, and corporations.  The big guy can't get his 10% without graft and corruption.

Oh, and inflation?  It isn't what you think.  Inflation is merely the removal of reserve currency status.  You can thank Joe.  They did it the back door way, but that is what has happened.  I'm surprised some of the 'clever bois' haven't noticed, understood.  Not paying attention, with the covid bs running so strong, I guess.  But, that is what has happened.  It can get worse, it won't get better.  Get used to it.  Thank you, Joe, and big biz.  Assholes.

Anyway... on to some gaming.  It, at least, keeps me awake. 

Crashed.

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Didn't get to breakfast, chores... anything.  Wait, I think I fed the girls.  Took medicine?  Nope, but did feed the girls.  Waking at around 18:00, a bit after.  Chores, first thing.  They were dry and hungry, but just.  A few had some water remaining.  I expect food will be gone, and it was.

Still rather warm out there, given the date.  December the third?  I don't think it froze today.  I am sure it didn't.  The few with water in them were still flowing.

A shower, and boxes... and else... in this front room today.  Anything else might be incidental or supplemental to that.  Assuming I can even get to that.  Will see.  The water is being warmed for breakfast.  Just the same old, same old, but it really does work for me.  At this point, I don't need exciting food for every meal.  Some regular, some changes, it works.  I'm actually just glad I am eating something.

How do you know your food is good?  Toilet paper tells you what a doctor should.  Well, and the ease of passing.  If it's difficult, you aren't eating correctly.  Since starting chia as a nearly daily morning ritual, life has been much easier.  It was only a problem from time to time.  Since, though, I simply haven't had a problem, no matter what else I eat.  Kefir was good too.  I need to get back to that.  I could see chia breakfast, kefir lunch, then a "meat and potato" within just about any calorie and macronutrient generally given for the day without regards to breakfast and lunch at all.  

Trust me, those things might as well be zeros the way I set them up and consume them.  Well, and a kefir with supper as well.  Just a digestive dose right before I eat.  Kefir... does something to the digestive system.  I suspect it helps pull nutrients, and push out what doesn't belong or do well in the body.

I just need to get kefir going, and get back to cooking.  If I cook rightly, I can cook just three meats a week, and have them last.  And I have a few new ways to cook veggies which won't take pots or pans.  But... I have to get kefir going again, and get the kitchen cleaned back up, and ready for cooking.  Meats... I can grill, roast, fry, or try the airfryer on eventually.  Well, and the instapot for soups.  It is soup season again.  Ugh... got to get the world back in order!

Especially since medicines might actually have started working.  If I could get it all going, at once, perhaps I could have more of a life again.  I won't ever have my life back.  That went out with the heart.  But I might be able to enjoy more of it.  Hiking, snowshoeing, camping... winter and summer.  Little things.  But... I want some of my life back.

Later.

Awake, if strangely.

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I woke, really, around 11:00~11:30.  I didn't get up until 13:00 or so.  No more awake than I was asleep between those times.  Just not doing well.  Then again, I don't hurt.  It's just that my body doesn't seem to be able to figure out whether it's awake, asleep, has to go to the bathroom or not, or what!  I'm just stuck trying to figure life out in a body which doesn't want to shut anything off or turn anything on.

In spite of oddities, blood sugar is down a bit this morning, at 184.  Up, down, left, and right, even that is really odd.  I did get both pill medication groups in yesterday, and while I wasn't dosing as I should have been, I did get some insulin in yesterday.  And it shows.  I had a few pistachios before remembering to test.  It may have been lower still, not sure how fast blood sugar begins to spike after eating?

Sam did come up and visit last night.  Not sure why.  She actually visited two different times.  I enjoy their company.  I do wonder if they get peeved about some things, and just don't visit for that reason?  Litter, keeping up on litter.  Not doing so, and, yea, they get... annoyed.  Or if food is a bit slow or lacking.  And if I don't shower often enough.  Forget to brush my teeth for a bit...  Women are... women... cat, bat, human, or else, I suspect.

Anyway...  Oh, actually, I think I'll go back in to bed for a while.  Ugh.  Later.

A bit to eat and medicine.

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Not much else.  Good enough though.  Insulin and pills.  And, about to go back on to bed.  I keep hoping to get more done.  I keep failing.  Odd.  Probably more the weather than else.  Even as warm as it is, the 30s to nearly 50 in the day.  So... quite warm, for winter.  But... cooler.

I really need to get to some work.  I keep failing.  Thursday, going on Friday.  I have been trying to remember the day... trying to remember without having to look.  Doing well, really, lately.  Yes, technically actually Friday, but that's not how it seems when you are awake, to start, on the day before.

Oh well.  On to sleep.  I will leave the door open, for the girls.  If they don't seem interested lately.  Not sure why.  Goodnight.

Good afternoon-morning.

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Up and... just up.  Cats have been fed, teeth brushed.  Pills, vitamins, and electrolytes in.  I can probably slow down on electrolytes now... say every other day?  Those have allowed me to cut my drinking to, probably, less than a gallon.  If I still drink more, for good or ill, just not much more.  Enough that one water pill will do.

I won't be cutting that anytime soon.  I had thought about it.  And, in time, may.  But only after I am on a more finalized regimen.  Then I will contemplate going to half a pill, perhaps, if that works out, even dropping that.  It is one of the medicines which causes kidney issues, for certain.  The problem is, in the summer, I may end up drinking enough to need to be on them, one... or more.

Chores, soon.  Then, maybe, more work.  One can hope.

Sleep was good.  Warm.  I did have to redo blankets, but knew that and pulled them yesterday morning.  One of the blankets had three twists, only the full length of it?  I... don't even know how that happens.  It is a thick blanket, double thick, heavy.  It is in with the other blankets.  I didn't notice it with all of them, but this one.  Very strange.  Like a gator did a barrel roll with it.  And, that was one of four, two are very heavy blankets, the others are even relatively heavy.  I wonder if I will spin half so well in my grave?  Don't doubt it.

Well... on to waking.  Good day.  God's speed.

Crap. Drats?

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Coffee.  I thought to have more.  I ate the last of the baby carrots out of the bag of veggies as well.  But... something seemed off, so I tested again.  Blood sugar is 72!  Ugh.  I have to figure something else out.  Very... peculiar.  No dosing since it started to slide.  I don't even think I dosed with the meal prior to the fatted coffee and carrots.

What to eat which won't drive the blood sugar terribly high, or leave it to fall?  I don't really have...  Well, maybe.  But that might drive it too high.  Beans and beef?  On salad?  Or, maybe I will try frozen chimichangas.  That... might do.  Or it will drive it high.  I could add cheese and sour cream.

Thinking has become difficult.  Trying to avoid candies.  Then again, that may be about what this is.  Still, I'll have a few of those, plus the adds, then go on to bed.

Goodnight.  And good morning.

Hmm, well?

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Not doing much.  Keeping the girls in food, and myself.  Feeling slightly wonky, so I did a blood sugar draw... 77 a few hours after my last meal.  Okay.  Low, but... seems stable.  Still, I really need to eat something.  Something... ketoish.  A fatted coffee might be a fast and good way?  I will try it.

I'd like to get trash, recycling, a shower, and start some dishes.  Don't know.  Let me get the coffee down, first.  It gets spooky when blood sugar is that low.  I did take "morning" pill medicines.  Actually, I have been taking the first set of medicines well, it's the "night" medicines I have been missing, for days.  I'll... fix that.

I can try.  Best get to that coffee.  I need something, something, or I will crash.  Right on the edge.  And low.  So, yeah.  I can hope to get a few things going tonight.  It's still possible.  Later.

Up and at it, a bit early?

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Yesterday it was 17:00.  This morning, it is 15:00, so, yeah.  Though I think It will be chaotic for a while.  Still, got to chores, and feeding and watering the girls first thing.  Gee, that takes longer than I thought.  Forty to fifty minutes to just do those things, and with a swing in my step.  I go as fast as I can, and yea, I can move.  Especially on a warm day.

It has been in the 50s lately, in the day.  Since I wasn't up, or out, I didn't notice.  Today, on top of being warmer, the sun is out.  It is actually hot out there.  While 48, in December, is pretty hot, at least here, when it is cloudy, 48 just feels... blahish warm.  With the sun out, it feels like beach weather!  Wow.

Getting water for tea, thinking about a shower, brushed my teeth while at things.  More may be possible today.  I slept warm last night.  Broke the bedding down this morning, so that it has to be remade tonight.  I like sleeping warm, and think there is a chance at keeping that up.  Too warm?  I can deal with that.  Feet out, for a bit.  A whole leg if that is too much.  Perhaps the cap off.  Yes, a sleeping cap really does help, if you can keep it on.  Though, I suspect, it gets tumbled off if I start warming, then rolling.  It's almost an automated regulated heater... or insulator, really.  The only heater, up there, while I sleep, is me.  Even when the girls come up, they just eat my heat.  Thankfully I am, usually, more like a pot bellied stove than not.

Hmm, reminds me...  I left the door open last night, but the girls didn't visit, meowl in the night, or anything.  Odd.  Very odd.  But, I slept great, and they had the opportunity.  No skin off my nose, at all.  

Yea, a shower, again today.  Then, hopefully, some dishes in.  Just enough to finish yet today, or early tomorrow, so as to shower again.  And trash and recycling out.  Yea.  I... think so.  If I get through the couple of dish pans, I may start another load.  And?  Boxes.  If I can get to those, that would be wonderful.  Even just a start.  And move some of the purchases out of the way of the door?  Ugh.  Bleh.  Yes.  We will see.

Oh, and the waterers.  I did get two buckets of fresh water in.  Refilling the girls' waterer, washing it out first.  Not many left to do, I have been keeping up.  I now have enough waterers for a two and a half days, of two changes, for each type.  Oddly, the rabbits have slowed their drinking.  I do have to the change the waterers in the building every day, but just once a day.  Those are the smallest waterers.  The other rabbits only need changed every other day, though I check at least once, often twice.  As to food?  They will eat all I give them.  So I have backed off feed.  Once a day, about four to six ounces (at least).  But... just once a day.

Well, on the looking around the web, gaming for a spot... on a timer.  To make sure I go get a shower, then set up dishes.  Then back to gaming, on a timer?  Something like that.  With browsing tossed in, from time to time.  It's as good as I can do, atm.  I'll keep at it.  Good morning, afternoon, and day.  I'll say a quick prayer for the world, and the fools upon or near it.  Good day indeed.

Feeling great.

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Just not doing much, or even staying on meds.  I guess... well... I'll... keep trying.

I was surprised, when I got out.  The rabbits hadn't consumed much of their water.  It was still flowing, too.  Their food, they needed and wanted that.  But not so much water?  Very strange.  I won't be checking them, again, until I wake.  The girls have been hungry as bears.  I won't feed them all the time.  I will... add in extra, when they really seem hungry.  Especially if it is both of them.

I baked the rest of the vegetables, tonight.  Having that as my actual supper.  A bit of sea salt, butter, pepper, garlic, and onion powder(s).  I should have skipped the powders.  Didn't really add anything.  But the veggies were good.  Delicious.  It's been a long time since I roasted veggies.  And, just on their own?  Broccoli, cauliflower, and carrots, along with the rest.  Rather a good meal.  A bit higher in carbs, but the type of carbs I allow.  Carrots being the one standout, unusual, add.

Oh, and I finally tried pink grapefruit perrier.  Wasn't sure that would work.  I try to taste all of the flavors, but if prices are too high, I skip.  Finally found this flavor at a price I could tolerate, so took a shot.  Wish, now, I had bought several.  Then again, these don't last long.  And, plastic is always questionable at best.  They say you can store water stored in plastic for a year, but... I have my doubts.  I wonder how long the ones, stored in foil, last?  Anyway...  It really is... good, different, solid.  Missing something, but I think in a good way.

I did get a shower, if I hadn't mentioned it.  Needed, and enjoyed.  I had trouble staying warm last night.  I had the blankets right.  Finally, though, I reset everything.  And that seemed to work, for some reason.  Well, too, I added a cap.  I hate nights when I can't get warm.  Never can sleep well.

I think I'll go on to bed shortly.  Sweet dreams, pleasant sleep, or really good nightmares, if you... enjoy them, as I do?  Oh, I do.  But I like good dreams too.  If you are just waking, good morning.  I'll put in a prayer for you all.  You know you need it.  Goodnight.

Da fuck.

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I started playing an old game I had.  Why?  There is, in a month or two, set to be released a second part.  I wasn't sure I liked the original.  Got my juices flowing, looking over the new title.  So, I... stuck my head in.  At first, just a few hours at a time.  It's all I could play, maybe twice a day.

However, as my acumen, stamina, and else, increased, I... am... lost in the game.  At least it isn't a bottle I crawled into.  Or... encased me?  Whichever.  In the bottle... game... I am, with barely a cork to pop for release.  Loving it.  And, I am not sleeping excessively.  Mostly.  Every few days, I suspect, I will crash for longer times, in order to make up for the excessively (at least for me, thought that seems to be changing) days.  Then again, I think my days are expanding.  Instead of twelve to sixteen hour days, I am hitting more like eighteen to twenty four hour days.  And, that may extend further.

Of course, medicine, food, and else, are also going back into the shitter.  I'll... try to keep up on that.  I may put something into my phone, and keep the meds out there, since I am no longer sitting this machine.  Bleh.  So weak, and yet so powerful at some times.  If I could target this, I would go back to engineering school.  If I could sustain it, I would be back in school, then doing engineering somewhere.  But, even for gaming, it will only last a while, then I will crash out and not be able to do anything for a while again.  Or die.  I just... don't die well.

So be it.  I did have that last supper.  But, even after it, and candies, as I was going to bed, without having dosed, I was crashing again?  I had to take more candies, but just two.  I... just don't get that.  Something is really off in things.  I'll... keep trying.  

On to chores, feeding the girls, litter, and gaming.  Oh, and breakfast.  Later.

A second meal, that is all.

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Started stumbling.  Into sleep.  Couldn't push much more.  Gamed, with timers, attempting to... do something.  I was done back then, just didn't know it.  Bedtime.  Goodnight.  Sleep well, and warm.  I'll pray for you... us.  

Just about crashed.

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As chicken was finishing, blood sugar took a dive.  Hard.  I couldn't wait for super.  I took some of the hard candy.  Okay, I ate six to eight pieces.  Better than what is often the case.  I tried just three.  A while later it was still bad, so I took a few more.  And, finally, I took three more just because it was all still wonky.  I wanted even more, but I am trying to control the urge to just gobble dozens, or scores.

Not sure what happened.  All I know is, it shouldn't have.

The chicken was only so-so tonight.  It took forever for it to cook, and even then wasn't quite done?  I did put the broccoli and cauliflower in with it.  I have never done that before.  That must have been it.  I wasn't happy with it at all.  I have decided to have a potato after all.  There are two pieces of chicken left.  About half way through, I am putting the chicken back in the oven, and I'll try for a better meal shortly.

I am dressed warmly, had the furnace up (to warm the waterers, but forgot it up), had a warm to hot supper, and still am chilled.  A cup of tea, it is hoped, will knock the edge off.  And supper, in a bit.  Still, it is very strange.  I do my best, but sometimes it all sort of just falls down, like a house of cards, in a sudden breeze.  I'll keep at it.

Just about to go check on the rabbits.  Just waterers, tonight.  Food in the morning.  I am hoping to get cat litter sorted, this evening.  Perhaps a shower in.  And, just maybe, trash out.  And recycling.  Then I'll go on to bed.  Hmm, if I get the rabbits done, and the litter finished, before supper... then get trash and recycling... and then a shower...  I might be able to get to bed in a few hours.  Breaks between.  I can try.  Oh, that tea is a treat.  I... think I can get to the rabbits right now.  Later.  Or goodnight.

Hmm, well?

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Finally having breakfast?  Only four hours after waking.  Ha.  Still, it works.  First, chores, then feeding the girls, blogging, and then starting it up.  A bit of gaming after that.  And, while having a problem I can't find a way around in the game, I decided to go look, and remembered breakfast.

I realized I had forgotten medicine over the weekend.  Disappointing.  As far as I could remember, I was almost certain I had been taking medicine.  Almost none of it, it seems, was taken?   I can't be sure, but pills definitely weren't taken.  I honestly am sure I remember taking it.  Odd.

However, there is something I noted.  The blurry vision?  Is gone.  It must have been one of the medicines.  Crap.  I may stop the amlodipine.  Well, how about this.  I will restart medicine.  If the blurry vision returns, I will stop the amlodipine.  If that doesn't do clear it, I will go back onto it, but back off the carvedilol.  Though, who knows, maybe it's a problem with lower blood pressure.  Perhaps my body simply isn't used to it?

Chicken, tonight, again.  Just oven roasted.  I will have a potato again.  Yea, but... few choices.  I really can eat only just so much lettuce.  And, right now, I am not quite up to... wait... I have veggies.  I could roast those right in with the chicken!  That would do.  I don't mind a potato a week or so.  Hmm... might split that, bake it and split it.  I ought to check how much a larger potato has, for carbs... 60~64 carbs?  Okay, so half, twice a week, as all my carbs for the day?  

Yes, I could do that.  Could spend my carbs better, or better go without.  But... shut up.  Further, due to size (and it being actual size, not just fat size) I do get a few more carbs than most, more like 45 to 50.  If, still, I try to do cleaner, better, carbs, and cut rather than go for the limit.  Then again, who to believe, on anything, differs.  I still am trying to stick closer to 20 to 30 maximum carbs, and trying to cut even that.  It just doesn't always work.

Yea, cauliflower, broccoli, and chicken, baked in juices...  Veggies removed at the end, while the chicken gets crisped under the broiler?  Sounds good to me.  Just water, to wash it.  All good.  Perhaps a bit of butter, on the veggies?  Yes.  Plus salt, pepper, and a touch of ground coriander?  Aye.  If I wanted to add that reddish brown, I could add paprika... or smoked paprika for the color and some smoke?  No, not this time.  I love considering what will be done.  Even if I end up not doing it, it's almost like I got to eat... two or three times if I follow the considerations to their ends, in thought.  Food is so good.  Smoked paprika next time?  Maybe.  When you can't grill, or don't want to, there are other ways which really do, or can, work.  With a little practice.

I'll check the rabbits later.  Just their waterers.  Food, from now on, will be offered out when I wake, or earlier in the day.  Water twice a day, as I am able.  I best get cat litter caught up.  I... drop the ball on that often.  Ugh.  I do my best, and it will have to do.  Later.

Uhrm, right?

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Can't be sure when I went down.  I did reset the waterers, out there, and fed them too.  They got their double feed Thanksgiving.  I woke right after 13:00, small change after.  Got right to a few things.  Chores, first.  Of the ten cages, only three were out of food.  No waterers needed changed, either.  I will check again tonight, they should be out by then.

It is 48, or so.  Didn't look exactly, just roughly.  A nice day, really.  I am working on breakfast, it is brewing as I write.  When I go out to check it, I will feed the girls.  I will refresh their water tonight, and try to catch up on waterers when I reset them tonight.

I am not sure gaming is helping, or is just a sign of slight improvements.  I really didn't do well on the other medicine, it was just too strong.  Oh, but I did reset the pillbox yesterday, so it is up to 10 mg per day of the older new pill.  I didn't pull the old medicines though, that will just happen as it happens, or, maybe, when the new new pills arrive.  We will see how that goes.  

To be honest, even the medicine I can tolerate has me right on the edge.  If I am having trouble with the next medicine, I may try a few other things.  I actually do have two other things I can cut, one of them definitely is difficult for me to take.  I have two doses of carvedilol twice a day, one is big, the other small.  But, even that small one is a difficult task, and probably only takes 5 points off bp.  That is the one I would remove, to try to tolerate the other medicine, if necessary.  Then again, it might be good to drop that right off?  I don't know.  That leaves me one more lever to pull, halving the amlodipine.  Ugh.  At least I didn't crash so badly that I lost it all and had to start over, again, again.

Well, boys and girls, it's back to life.  I have breakfast to sort, some gaming to do, then maybe on to some work.  Yeah.  Later.

No dice.

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I had hoped to do something today.  Nope.  I will get the rabbits an extra feed, plus their second water check.  And the girls are eating pretty good.  Plus, I did cook the burger, and had taco salad.  But that's it.  Mostly.  My list just won't be done.

Gaming may eventually help.  Currently, I am not able to play for long.  I am playing well enough, remembering where to go, what to do, how to create or manipulate things in game.  But I can't play for long.  I... just get lost.  Still, it is the path to something more.  Maybe.

I had meant to get to the V.A. last week.  The problem is, money is too low.  I need gas money.  I have a bit of cash, but not enough.  The tank is low.  As gas is, I can't fill the tank, and probably reload when I get back.  I wouldn't make it.  There might be enough in the account, but it would be pushing it.  I'll... do what I can, when I can.

Tired.  Exhausted.  Best get to chores before I just lose complete track and go to bed.  Getting foggy in the noggin.  Good night.

Not moving quickly.

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I did get completely caught up on waterers.  All filled and portioned.  Though I may be switching a few things soon.  During the day, the warmer parts of it, I will put out larger waterers.  But at night, I would prefer to have smaller ones out.  Smaller ones will freeze quicker, but will thaw quicker too.

I have enough for two water changes, for two days.  Which means I have to hope they thaw in time to be put back out.  Currently, it is, or was, 48 F out there.  Which means the ones I put out in the morning should be good most of the day, or all day.  Whatever I put out later in the afternoon will probably freeze quickly.  Then again... Weather is begin odd.  Very cold here, warmer there, and I'm not really able to be sure what will happen next.  I'll just do my best for them.

I am thinking frying burger, and spicing it well, added to salad, will be supper.  Though, maybe, I'll have chicken again too.  Hungry.  For good food.  And it is easy enough.  Baking chicken is okay, but a recent trick really does improve that dish.  Using the broiler, it crisps it up.  I've been experimenting how long and the temperature.  It looks like right at 400, for three minutes, on each side (for chicken drumsticks) seems to be about right.

I must have forgotten to take insulin after my meal, blood sugar is up to 261.  Or I just ate a bit ago.  I just... can't remember.  So sleepy?  Tired, more like it.  Brain fog.  All I ate was chia, with cream and spices.  It shouldn't have jumped.  Until it comes back under control, sensitivity can be peculiar.  As well, when I mess with blood pressure medicine, that has a strange affect too.  It's just the way it is.

I am getting hungry.  I'll have a fatted coffee, a dose, and start thinking about supper.  I'll try to push a few things through.  That may work or not.  So tired.  Exhausted too.  Not really sleepy, if I could sleep if I would allow it.  Later.

Awake, finally.

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No idea when I went to bed.  It is just 14:08, after waking, dressing more properly... at least to go out, and then doing chores.  I am hoping to feed the rabbits twice today, as their Thanksgiving feast.  All of their waterers were freeflowing still, only one needed changing because it was empty.  Yes, we all have one of those rabbits.  Still, I don't mind.  I may have to put a bigger jug for him.  Actually, there are two rabbits like that.  One is a boy, the other a girl.  The buck is of the big breed, the doe is of the small breed.  One is favored, the other is not.  And, yet, I will tend them as I can.

Trash, recycling, a shower, and then?  I am hoping to get to more.  I am feeling better, other than blood sugar doing weird things.  Blood sugar is 210 this morning, fasting.  Which really annoys me.  Hmm, I had milk with supper, okay.  Still.  With it dropping to 66, and just having one meal after that, and mostly keto...  Then again, raw straight milk is pretty harsh.  Right or wrong, I am still annoyed.  Why can't it just do right, regardless of me!?!  Still, I'll keep at it.  On the good side, at least I didn't need candies or such.  I handled it, if the landing was a bit rough, with just food.  Glucose tabs and candy would have driven it a bit to a lot higher.  There is that.  Then again, again, milk was... is... a form of candy.  It is.  

I am not bothering with bp because it will be high.  Oh, but I realized I was supposed to increase amlodipine to the full 10mg per day, but had forgotten to do that.  I started last night, but need to go through my pillbox and reset that.  Which I can do whilst tinkering this morning.  Bleh, always something forgotten, set aside, or figured out, causing more things to be done, in a world I can't keep up with all that well.  I'll... keep trying, until I die, I guess.

Well, a bit of water, with electrolytes.  And pill medicine as water warms for breakfast...  Then on to some other things, perhaps gaming to wake a bit, then to work... or just those should-be daily chores...  Gaming is limited.  I can't get glued to it, as I have in the past.  Just a few hours at a time, but it... activates parts of my brain which have been idle for a long time.  I can't game for very long... an hour or two at a time, then I'm... I need a break.  Excellent though.  That is perfect for segmenting my day between mental, physical, and various options among those.  Then again, and too, I can't stay busy all of the time.  Which... is what the computer often offers... like switching channels, to see what I can see, but trying not to think too much, or do more than consider what is proffered.  Most of which is... not real these days.  But oh well.

On to looking over the web, meds, and hydration, then breakfast.  Later.

A pretty good dinner.

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Just pork chops, grilled, on a salad.  Italian dressing, and the salad has cucumbers, carrot shreds (light), and tomatoes... cherry, and very tasty.  I added shredded cheddar, just a touch.  Quite good.  As well, I shared out about a quarter of the third chop with the girls.

Was feeling a bit rough.  Odd, as I have abused myself, with a potato yesterday, and fast food several days in a row.  I was dosing a bit stronger, with insulin, because beyond eating poorly... wrongly... I had forgotten insulin for a few days.  Well, yes, it didn't seem to matter.  Blood sugar was at 66 and I could tell it was dropping.  So, as much as possible, I hurried my meal.

Now I feel truly terrible.  I think I got food in, but the time it took cost me.  Like it or not, my night is finished.  Tried to game, and do some other things, to dent the fall.  No good.  I am trashed, done, for the night.  Headachy, a few other aches and pains.  Rough.  I had hoped to feed the critters more.  The girls have gotten extra feed, not so the rabbits.  I'll... they'll get their thanksgiving when they get it.  And they will, just not tonight.  Ugh.

Night meds, I already took slow acting insulin.  One of those new migraine pills and pill night medicine.  And... that should be it.  I'll have to go on to bed and try to sleep it off.  I have candies up there, in case it continues to fall.  I should take some water, to get the cloying of sweets from disturbing my sleep, just in case.

Still, all good.  I got a bit more done today.  I keep digging at it, trying to get even more done.  Falls, spills, accidents, but... so be it.  Goodnight.

It took a long time to get started.

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Then again, at least I started with gaming.  Well, actually, before that, I reset all the waterers.  Then set them to warm.  Then I started gaming.  Oh, I am sure, playing games may seem leisurely, to most.  To me it is work.  It makes me think, I have to remember things, the stresses within the game are... harsh, to me.  Gaming is as close to work as I can get.

The thing which makes gaming different from work is, I can do it at my time... when I can.  If I fail, it is only a setback for the game, but can be made up.  A boss doesn't want to deal with setbacks.  Often, they won't deal with setbacks, or not many.  And, they require a form of timed quota, with no setbacks.  Simply beyond my ability.

I played for a few hours, and the water warmed.  When I finished, I got to the rabbits.  Their waterers were thawed, out there.  But they were hungry.  I did feed them, and will feed them later.  Today is their Thanksgiving.  The girls will get three feedings today, and two snacks.  As for myself?  I technically already had mine, but will try to get another good meal.  Pork chops, grilled.  I had thought about another potato, but... no.  I will have a salad to go with it.

I seem to have lost track of insulin, both fast and slow.  Getting to town, trying to get things caught up, plus cooking, just... it was too much with the cool weather and this level of meds... at least for the moment.  I will keep at it.  So very tired, but things are being done.

Hmm, a fatted coffee, shortly.  A bit of browsing on the web.  Getting the grill going, then getting chops cooking.  I'd like to reset waterers brought in, shortly, as well.  I did bring a bucket of fresh water in for the girls, and then another one in order to reset waterers.

I would like to get trash and recycling out.  Perhaps get another shower, and set up dishes.  Probably dreaming.  Not sure all of that is possible.  Though, who knows.  Sometimes it is possible.  My mother called tonight.  She is getting things done there, with help.  Sounds healthy, and able.  Plus is getting out from time to time.  All good.

I need something, something.  Food?  Water?  Something.  I'll have some water with electrolyte added.  And meds and vitamins, if I haven't taken them?  I think I have had medicines, pills, and insulin... fast acting... with chia breakfast.  But I am thirsty, and maybe a touch hungry, in the way that really does mean food could be had.  Or... I might wait on that.

Yes.  I will have electrolyted water, and just hold off on the chops until a bit later.  

Finally, a real meal.

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I can't be sure how long it has been since I made a meal, a real meal.  Oh, chia seed breakfast is okay.  And cheese sandwiches are fine.  But they aren't a real, hot, meaty meal.  I haven't cooked in a very long time.  I have been so very hungry for a homecooked meal.

Thanksgiving was a bit late, but good.  Not keto, I had a potato too.  The rest was four chicken drumsticks.  Of which the girls got one, plus bones.  While I was cooking the meal, Sassy... went all very weird.  So I put her away.  She was yeowling in the oddest fashion.  Then Sam, while I was eating, became an absolute creep.  I almost didn't share.  Thankfully, for them, three was quite enough.

Ah... to have a hot, multi-item meal, with meat and... almost anything else would have done.  I have other foods, for soon, tomorrow probably.  Taco salad, more chicken, oh and pork chops.  Yeah, I'll eat well for a short bit.  And, with the salad, I can add tuna as well.  Not as fancy, but it is easy.  I might even add some fat to the tuna, and heat it, by frying it in butter.  As well, as I eat, I will try to aim toward keto again.

Oh, and tomorrow, the rabbits will get two meals, early and late.  Though... sort of on my schedule, which is off.  It's 04:38 and I won't be quite going to bed for just a bit.  Soon, though, soon...  as I can.  Later, or maybe goodnight if I don't happen to get back to the blog... which I probably won't.

Out?

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I went to my usual feed supply store.  None.  Not just rabbit food, they were out of half a dozen items.  I thought most other stores were twice the cost.  And they might be.  I thought the rabbit food I generally buy is in 50# bags, but maybe not?  If so, yes.  If not, then no.  Still, I found some in town, enough to last a few weeks.

I fed the critters first thing, and changed their waterers.  On to three were frozen, or near it.  One was empty.  The rest were cold but flowing, just low enough to pull and replace.  All of their feeders were empty, but that is to be expected.  Actually, I wasn't able to feed them well yesterday, so will do so probably tomorrow.  I ran out.  Thankfully they don't know which day was Thanksgiving, so a Saturday Thanksgiving will be just as good as a Thursday one.

While in, I stopped at the grocery store, after checking my account.  Low, but there was some money.  Just... some meats, the family salad pack, and more cheese for sandwiches.  Perhaps a few other odds and ends, but I kept it light.  Burger, at $6 to $7 a pound?  Which meant anything else was out of the question.  Even pork is up to about that, chops.  The more they increase, the less I buy.  I have... other things to eat.  

Worse comes to worse, an occasional fast food run.  Still pricey, but not THAT pricey.  Choices.  I suppose my Sunday dinner may become McDonalds, or chicken.  Actually, since Wendy's will do lettuce wrapped burgers, I am going that way.  When I do well, I remember my water, and just order a couple of doubles, on lettuce.  The funny thing is, all the McDonald (etc.) bitchers will be in line behind me.  Sometimes, yes, it does come down to dimes and nickels and hard but final choices.

Oh, I found a few medium and small waterers.  I look every time I am in, for what, often, the effort is worth.  Still, a few, here and there, is good.  I'd like, perhaps, six more of the smaller ones, maybe a dozen?  Then I can more easily switch out the faster to thaw ones, twice, even three times a day.  I like my critters.  I try to do good by them.  Even if they never produce.  Not the, or a, savior... or king... but the them... if captively... along those lines.  But, the truth of those notions isn't to boss or own or else, it... is to serve.  So, I serve.  Like trying to wear His sandals.  Poorly, but... it's as good as I can do.

Ugh.  I am hoping to get to bed before long.  I would like to check the waterers.  The girls have been fed twice, today, so I am good.  And I let them up today.  They only go up during the day, mostly, oddly.  While I couldn't wake well, we did have fun, from time to time.  I play wrestle, tease, itch and scratch, then fall asleep, every few hours.  Oh, they love it, taking turns.  More trying to wake me up to feed them, if they do enjoy light rough and tumbles.  I truly love the girls, and I think they love me right back.  Mostly.  Just glad I am the larger of the group, by far.  Just as with women of any type.

Well... on to... something?  Something, or nothing.  Good evening and day.  Oh, and while at it, a small prayer for yahoos and goodun's, near and far, kin, kith, enemy.  Amen.

Odd.

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To bed at 22:30.  Not as early as hoped, but sure beats 01:30, 04:30, or later.  Sleep has been very odd lately.  I am not sure when I woke, but I think it was around 12:30?  13:30?  It is nearing 15:00.  I did get a shower, and fed the girls.  Hoping to do a few other things, though who knows.

Sleep was good, but difficult to escape.  I'm not sore.  I did miss medicine last night, all of it I think.  Blood sugar was pretty high this morning.  Though it seems, the longer I go without carbs, when I eat a bit of carbs it absolute crushes blood sugar.  There isn't a middle ground, or a way back.  Double my carb allowances last night and blood sugar went nuts.  Or some carbs are even worse than others... or, some other possibilities.

The thing is, I need food.  More solid food.  Beans, meat, more solid veggies.  But I just don't have anything of the keto variety easily available.  And, to be honest, keto food isn't easy to keep on hand, with enough variety, for quick or easy meals.  Most of it requires cooking.

Anyway... on to something.  Getting dressed, now that I am dry, and... I don't know.  Later.

To bed early.

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Possibly?  Probably.  Thought I'd check blood sugar.  Reading 72 I think I should eat something.  Especially since I still need to take slow acting.  And, will be increasing that tonight.  All I can see is a can of beans and cheese.  Not keto friendly at all, but as low as it is I don't mind.  No fast acting, of course.

Just been sitting.  Though no great difficulty.  I am hoping to pull in a new bag of rabbit feed, get some in the buckets, then get fresh waterers out... and feed.  Trying to keep the critters watered and extra feed for the holiday.  Not a lot, just... a bit extra.  If I can't eat much, at least they can.  Hungry, I just... don't really have more going on and nothing thawed.  But I am satisfied with it all.

Oh, I suppose I'll get the girls another meal.  Three in a day is an extra.  And, maybe, two treats as it will end up.  As well, I need to get their litter cleared.  It's in pretty good shape.  I'd like to keep it that way.  I had the door open yesterday, but they didn't come up.  Not sure why.  Usually, after a shower, they like to come up.  Not last night.  Yeah, I know, Tuesdays and Thursdays, but I think I forgot Tuesday?  

Who knows... a bit off even now.  It may not be the medicine?  Might it just be the cool and dark?  Even when the sun is out, it goes down so early.  Meh, I'll keep trying.  I'll get a bag of rabbit feed in, first, then make myself something to eat... take a bit of a break.  Then feed the critters.  I need food in order to do much more.

Later.  And, most likely, goodnight.

Rather tired.

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I did look outside, again.  To see what temp it was... 37.  Not freezing, but close.  And, who knows.  At this altitude, given a certain barometric pressure, with any breeze or wind, it might get to freezing at that temp.  Though that can possibly be true on flatlands.  Though, honestly, I am not sure if the chill index actually affects the temp at which water freezes?  Barometric pressure, I am almost certain, will.  And I strongly suspect the wind chill will.  But... Not certain, from my own experimentation or experience.

No calls.  And I don't want to interrupt anyone's meal.  But I am fine.  So tired it is difficult to tend some things anyway.  Not much else going on.  I hope to check the waterers in a few hours, and get more food out.  I gave them a bit last night, and this morning.  The girls are getting a bit more, too.  I doubt if they will ever understand holidays, but... I can do that part for them.  They can just enjoy a bit extra, from time to time.

Someone has been around.  Something about what I wrote recently seems to have stirred someone.  Not sure if it is the last possible I had considered.  Maybe she... likes the idea, not the reality, and visits.  I may work a little up, from what was viewed, here and there.  She'd... do.  Though I am not sure she wants to just "do".  It might not be her at all.  Perhaps someone else thinks to present possibilities, hopes, thoughts.  Never can tell.

A bit to eat.  Perhaps a bit more.  Not terribly hungry.  Still, it's... not always about hunger.  It's about knowing food is needed.  Later.

A strange one.

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I don't think I dreamed.  But I sure slept deeply.  I didn't get down until very late.  I at first thought it was 01:30, then remembered.  I didn't sleep until 04:30 (give or take minutes, less than a dime).  But, then, sleep I did.  A prayer first.  Usually intended, not always able.  And, sometimes, I fall asleep in the middle of it, if I don't cut it short.  If too, usually, later, if I think I dozed in the middle, I finish it later.  I do my best, He knows it.

Awake at 11:30, give or take less than a dime in pocket change minutes.  But which way?  *filip*  Awake and actually at it.  I got right out and refreshed the rabbits' waterers.  They had all been used, but were all quite frozen.  I'll get them reset again tonight.

It is a bit tight this morning.  Is it the cold?  Could be.  Well, and still down from medicine.  It... can take a while.  The more extreme the environment, the longer it takes to acclimatize to medicine.  Even what I normally take, I am always sort of on the edge with that.  Any new medicine can be that proverbial feather that breaks the camel's back.  The first one was good, the second one not so much.  We will see about this next one.  I was afraid, and rightly.  Then again, I was afraid of the last two adjustments, and they went pretty good.  So, it's... not just psychosomatic.

Breakfast water is heating up.  Blood sugar is 238 fasting.  I forgot slow acting insulin, and fasting acting too really.  I didn't have an actual meal, but grazed on pistachios all through the evening.  And ate quite a few.  Couldn't quite get to things, to cleaning, and cooking.

Pretty tired today.  Oh, but it is Thanksgiving.  Ah.  And, yes, I am grateful.  I give thanks to God every time I pray.  Even a hard, harsh, life is worth celebrating.  It is a gift on a level very few groupings of molecules will ever know.  No boulder or comet or even sun, solar system, or universe will ever know having a will.  No matter how complex, or seemingly intelligent, they are all less than one human.  The hubris to claim the humility to be less is amazing.  Yes, that is what it is.  If you wish to be nothing, you... probably can't be.  Can go to hell, can't cease to be.  And shouldn't try to push that on others, who are humble to their nature as is.  Don't... try to square the infinite, you just look silly.

I forgot to keep my feet warm, for a few days.  Kept thinking I would get in to a shower, so didn't wear socks.  Then just... sat... in the cold.  My heels hurt, a lot, for it.  Dried up, dried out, and now they hurt.  It's as if the shelf between the flat and the whole of the foot, at the heel and around in a horseshoe shape, started separating.  Ugh.  I'll be limping for a bit.  But, okay.  I'll fix it.

Maybe another shower today?  I sure like them when I can get to them.  It is amazing how well I can clean up.  Even after an extended down time.  I am sure hoping medicines can be adjusted sooner than later, so I can get back to bathing and showering at least every other day.  It is too much, but with a bit of oil after, I seem to adjust to excessive cleanliness quite well.  And I dearly love it.  Most showers just being a quick clean, but one or twice a week a very long shower, or that and a bath.  Clean, clean, clean, clean, clean.  I really love being clean.

Well, good morning.  Good day.  God's speed.  And... get to it.  If you want to do me a favor, say a little prayer.  If you want to do yourself a greater favor, do that and for yourself, and the rest, even your enemies.  Amen.

A bit tough still.

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Things feel just a bit better.  Feelings, again, aren't translating to action.  I have been sitting here, might as well be counting flowers on the wall.  Wall paper just isn't the thing anymore, so I don't even have that.  Oh, but there is yt.  They have pretty much stripped it, so all I can do is look around, direct specifically.

With the notion of becoming an expat on my mind, I went looking with as a theme.  And, yea, I found interesting things.

Expat?

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Have thought about it.  Not sure it is possible.  Unsure if it would endanger .mil disability.  Though it almost certainly would be difficult to obtain medical abroad.  Though, maybe, at military bases?  Then again, some nations have their own programs one could enter.

Rents, in some places, are quite good.  Hiring a maid and cook is even possible, and for rather little.  Weather?  In some places, with mountains not far from beaches, you could have cool weather to live in, and a short ride to warmer weather most of the year.

Of course, politics, religion, monetary concerns... things can go south very quickly.  And a foreigner would be seen as an easy target, for one or many reasons.  Still, some places offer rent, maid services, cook (at least part time) and all for less than $600 a month.  Probably less, that was on the beach, higher up, and more for a small family.  I'd bet I could do with just $200 to $400, just smaller and more rural.

As to dangers?  I have dangers right here.  People are breaking into my house as is.  Who knows what all they take, or if or when they might try to harm me.  Perhaps they already are.  Strange blood sugar spikes, and missing and possibly rearranged medication makes me wonder.  At this point, it might be worth going elsewhere.

Just... thinking.  Saw a few videos.  Not conclusive.  Sent an email, with a few specific, noted here, queries.

Well... on to other things.  Later.

Disappointing.

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To bed at 19:16.  I was able to remember.  A good time, really.  And sleep was great.  I woke a few times.  Less than a average number of wakings, I am sure.  Even so, I wasn't able to wake until 11:00.  But why?  I didn't feel all that tired when going to bed.  I didn't feel bad, hurt, or... such.  I just couldn't wake.

Sam was letting me know it was time to get up, probably around nine.  But I heard her as if through a great distance, in a tunnel, in a dream.  I wanted to get up, to feed her.  My legs had no strength?  No, it wasn't a lack of strength.  There was simply no means by which to employ the strength they have.  Thought did not get on through to function.

Up, awake, now.  But just on that cusp.  Enough to be down, sitting, writing.  I am hoping to hit chores, if probably taking a shower first.  Chores, feeding the girls, tending their litter.  If I can get all of this done, shortly, perhaps I can do something more this afternoon and evening.  Maybe.

I'm not tired.  I am dissociated.  The lack of a link being thinking and doing seems strong.  Still, maybe.  I... might be able to get a few things going, done.  If just the small daily list, it is something.  If even more, all good.  I'll get to prayers before long.  I have been praying better, lately... more frequently and more fully.  There is that.

Oh... blood sugar.  I'm not sure it is fasting.  I got the munchies, and ate a few handful of pistachios.  It read 203, but that has been after grazing on nuts for the last fifteen minutes.  Ugh.  I hate when I do that.  I'll see, after breakfast, insulin, and a few hours.  

It always takes a while.

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Still, and not yet 22:00 if only by minutes, it's a good time to go to bed.  I will feed the girls first.  As well, I will leave the door open for them to join me, at their leisure.  I have decided, Tuesday and Thursday would be a good time to let them up.  Something for us to look forward to, a regular scheduled set of events.

I haven't been able to do anything else.  Still hungry, so I had a few more nuts.  Hopefully it will be okay.  Would rather have cooked meat, but what I have is what I ate.  I'll try to get a shower tomorrow, and get into the freezer.  At least I am keeping up with chores, got caught back up with the girls, and am eating something, anyway, and regularly.

Vision is still blurry.  I am hoping it will improve, in time.  Who knows.  I received eye drops, sans preservatives.  Not sure it will help, but seemed to.  Trying to remember to blink more often, as I think not blinking often enough is more of the problem than else.  Won't be able to know for sure until medicine becomes sane enough to go in to find out.  I'm not going as long as they are pushing shots and requiring masks.  They know better.  Then again, maybe their whole point is to shut down the medical establishments?  Especially public, government, ones.  Saving a lot of money.

Well, on to feed the girls, then on to bed.  Goodnight.

Cold out there!

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The thermometer reads 35, but the waterers were beginning to freeze.  Some were already frozen, most were just getting frozen.  Hands, and even body to a degree, got quite cold out there.  It is amazing how cold it is out there.  A bit of a heavier breeze going, and wind from time to time.

I am hungry, as in blood sugar was on the way down.  Thought about what I could eat that might not raise blood sugar.  Pistachios.  An ounce or two of those, and a bottle of water.  Should work out.  Medicine was taken.  No insulin with this meal, and I dropped the newest medicine, as that seems too strong or just not a fit otherwise.  Hopefully I have a few days to a week to sort of try to clear up a bit.

My mother called back.  She was out to her friend's house.  They are starting Thanksgiving preps.  I... didn't realize that was coming up.  Lost track.  Then again, barely staying seated and awake most days.  She sounded good but tired.  It doesn't take much to wear her out these days.  Still, at nearing eighty, with some hard falls and else, she's doing just fine.

I'll try to dig my way into the freezer, tomorrow, and see if I have a cornish game hen, or at least some chicken thighs or drumsticks.  If so, I'll get those thawing.  No stuffing, probably no veggies, but it'll do.  Just roast them, this time.  Not feeling like fiddling with the grill.  Assuming I have anything, and it gets thawed in time.

 It's almost bedtime.  I just need to... get ready to go down?  Something.  Goodnight.  Prayers for you.  Sleep well.

Not much more.

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I did reset the waterers available.  I turned up the heat to warm those a bit more before taking them out in a bit.  Cold.  Or so it seems here in the front room.  I did get a cheese and meat sandwich, plus pork rinds, for a meal.  A few hours after, blood sugar is 111.  I forgot to add a dose of slow acting insulin.  I'll do that tomorrow.  Just one cc per every three days, I was told.  Okay.  Seems a bit slow, but... there it is.

I will get to litter tonight, and feed the girls one more time.  As well, check the waterers out there.  Probably frozen.  Oh, and put a padlock on the tap out there, someone has been leaving it open, to freeze.  They are trying to break it, I guess.  They may have succeeded.  Still, I'll put a lock out there, and hope that keeps it from getting worse.  Someone seems to have a lot of time on their hands.

I am surprised they... hmm... maybe they did kill the rabbits too.  Just not all of them, or yet.

I did call my mom.  She didn't answer.  Her phone is working, at least.  And it did ring through, if to messaging.  Perhaps she is at bingo or some such.  Can't say I didn't try.

I'll give it half an hour, then check waterers out there.  If they are frozen, I'll replace.  If not... so be it.  Though I suspect they will be.  Cold out there.  Later or good night.

There are options.

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A new, new, medicine.  The last one will be dropped.  Ugh.  We will see if that works.  I will stop taking it as of tonight.  Though I go back on 10 mg of the older new medicine.  And, then, wait for the new medicine to come in.  As to the water pills?  I wasn't sure if a milder medicine was called for, or... what.

As things stand, I will wait until I get on the next new medicine.  If things go well, I will then begin trying something with the water pill.  If all goes well, and I get even to this point on the new medicine, he suggested trying half a pill.  Cool.  I don't quite want to quit the waterpill, whole hog.  But, when things are arranged on the new medicine, the possibility of cutting it in half sounds reasonable.

Three blood tests a day, he says.  I don't have enough test strips.  He tried to argue, looked it up.  He'll... add another pack.  I can't do what I don't have to do with.  Gladly do as suggested if I have it.  I did look at strips, to buy myself.  Not... too bad.  But I am sort of living on the edge, financially.  Not sure I could afford extra, not very often.  I may order an extra, if I am flush for some reason on some month, just to have a few extra in case I feel the need to test more often... which... sometimes I do.  A slush of extra.  I'll have a month or two to save aside a little for the extra.  I like to check more carefully (which means more often) if the number is sliding quickly, or some other extreme is happening.  If nothing else than to try to understand what just happened.  I am not still alive just by accident.  I try my best to sort out what is killing me, eating me, crashing me, and either prevent it or not allow it to happen again.  If I could figure my way to health, I would.  It just doesn't exist.  I am a miracle worker to a greater degree.  My miracles simply aren't complete.  That... would take Another.  Blood sugar is 138.  Time for a cheese sandwich, tea, and insulin I suppose.  I'll go with 8 cc's.

Oh, something about increasing the slow acting insulin in order to bring fasting blood sugar down to 80 to 120?  Or... something like that.  Up one unit every three days?  Okay.  Well, I can try that.  I think that was discussed before, but got lost in all else that was, or wasn't at the time, happening.  Ugh.  I'll... give it a go.  One unit tonight, to start.

I have to get in for blood work.  I'll... get to that soon.  He wants a fasting blood sugar draw.  That's... preferable, even for me.  So... all good.  A pretty good day.  Critters fed and watered, litter managed, trash getting put together to go out, and a few other things.  Plus medicine being managed and the appointment dealt with.  A shower would be good.  I'll have to do chores again this evening... just putting water out for them again.  A nap?  Not... yet, but I'd love one.  I really need to get meat out of the freezer.  I need food!

I had started tearing into things on top of the freezer.  I suppose I'll have to finish that soon.  I really need to get some meat out.  Then, maybe, I won't be eating as poorly.  A good, warm, meat meal a day is needed.  I can handle the chia seed breakfast and deli meat and cheese sandwich(es) for most of the day, with a handful of nuts as occasional sides or snacks once every few days.  But I really need a bit, warm, meat, meal a day, or even two out of three days.  A fatted coffee is coming back into it's own, as the weather cools.  Though I'd like to counter that with tea, say, every other day, give or take?

We'll see about the next medicine.  It sounds like there might be more options, after this.  With everything else so close, might be able to get there without too high of a level of other stuff.  Might be able to get this sorted, and still be somewhat functional.  Ugh.  Otherwise I just have to live with a slightly elevated bp, when I can take medicine.  So tired, on or off the medicine.  The medicine helps, right until it doesn't.  Ugh.

Later.

A few things.

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Medicine down, save insulin.  But breakfast is brewing.  Cats fed, their litter finally changed out.  Trash ready to go, recycling will also get readied and out sometime today.  Chores done.  Actually, a pretty good, and rather fast morning.  Surprising.  I'll definitely take it.  It's what I aim for every morning, just not what I get.

I must have twisted something.  My left side is a bit numb.  Not dysfunctional.  Not a stroke.  Just numb, as when you sit wrong, or too long, and the limb 'falls asleep'.  Only it's a large part of my left side.  Even my left facial cheek, if that has returned to feeling.  I don't think I've ever had that much of my body fall asleep before.  Ah!  I had a robe on the back of my chair.  It was just in the wrong place, was pushing against a part of my lower back and I think that did it.  Too asleep, initially, to realize that was poorly placed.  Odd world we live in.

Very good bp, at 107/78 pulse 75.  I took it within an hour of taking medicine this time, which seems to help a lot.  Not sure if eating raises bp too, but it might.  There is some mix between blood sugar and blood pressure.  Direct, indirect, partial, I just don't quite know for sure.  Hopefully blood sugar comes down well enough, and shortly.  Breakfast is ready to be stirred, plus a bit more water, then let to stew a bit longer.  I try to get as much expansion of the seeds as possible.

A shower, trash and recycling out, and then maybe a nap?  Oh, but I can't nap for a while.  Still, a nap is on the menu.  Unless I get past it.  Later.

Almost eight.

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So, probably awake at about 07:30?  It was brightening out there.  It helps to wake.  Still pretty cool though.  Yes, plenty cool outdoors at 22 F.  Frosted, grasses, probably trees too.  Not bad in here, for now.  Even in this cold front room.  A warm sleep, an easy wake, a few dreams and hopes of dreams, but gone with the light.

A shower, as soon as possible this morning.  And a bit more, if possible.  Chores... in an hour or so.  Hopefully letting it warm.  There isn't much warmth from the sun though, or doesn't seem it.  Who knows, maybe warmth from somewhere will blow in.  Always a bit of hope.

An appointment today, but over the phone.  If he will try again, I will try to get to the blood lab this time, sometime this week.  So tired.  At least I don't hurt.  But the sleepiness, weariness, tiredness, lack of focus... those types of things are every bit as bad, perhaps worse than, pain in keeping me down.  Days and weeks drift, without marks to remember or things to cause recall.  Actions become muted, then disappear in the fog without being started or finished.

I'll talk to him.  This is as good as it has gotten in decades, probably, blood pressure and blood sugar wise.  I have been close, but never right on.  This is it.  I have done my part, and somehow made it to this point without falling into sleep for weeks and months.  I hope he enjoys it, because this can't last.  I will have to back off, so as to function, or fall off in time.  Though, most likely, I will fall off almost no matter what, from time to time.  I can't maintain this.  Still, I guess he gets to see that medicine could work, if it could be maintained.  And that I can do it, for a while.  I'm not sure that is important, since it isn't sustainable.  A dog and pony trick, but... I have done what I can.

A shower, shortly.  Chores.  Cat litter, and feeding.  The appointment before long.  Then?  Anything else I might be able to do, or fit in somehow.  I'll... keep... trying to do things.  Blood sugar is 189 fasting, which is terrible.  Oh well.  I had two frozen burritos last night, had to have something warm, can't really cook.  Bleh.  Later.

Ah, stats.

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BP was a bit odd, at 114/86 with a pulse of 80.  Then again, I am wearing a belly band, for my pistol.  It's probably increasing it just a bit.  Still, not bad.  Blood sugar is 126.  Oddly low, given several recent readings.  But I'll take it.  Mostly doing nothing.  I can't wake, or get going well.  At all actually.

It is starting to cool off for the night.  It is cooler than usual.  It just is.  Or I think so.  Though it is steady.  So far.

I don't mind.  With the way I am doing things, I am sleeping warmly, comfortably, mostly.  There is always a night, from time to time, where I didn't reset the blankets, or I kicked and rolled more than usual... creating drafts.  Even then, with my pj's, it works well enough.

No serious pains or aches.  A bit today, but so light, mild, disperse, that I almost don't count it.  Tired, again.  Not sure why, if I think it is a combination of still getting used to medicine as well as the cold... or perhaps attempting to get used to medicine in the cool.

I will check the waterers tonight.  But I think they will still be good.  Being put out warm, at 40ish F, even if it feels chill.  Some may have been emptied though.  Some of the rabbits really eat and drink a lot.  Others have learned to conserve, just in case.

I may try to call my mother.  The problem is I have to wait until after she eats, perhaps until, what, 19:00 her time?  Something like that.  After dinner, and hopefully not when bingo or such is on.  Assuming she hasn't shut her phone off again.  If so, I won't call again until she calls me.  I just won't mess around too much.  Not grumpy about it.  It means she is fitting in, staying busy, and such.  Puff the magic dragon must always be left behind as people go about their lives, grow up, and go away.  I am used to that.

Chores... I'll do that now, so that when I feel it, I can go on to sleep.  Oh, but a bite to eat... a single cheese sandwich, an extra slice of cheese, and a fatted... something.  Goodnight, most likely.

Just getting to breakfast.

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A very slow day.  More waterers done.  Chores finished.  Cats fed a second time.  A few other very small things done.  Just can't get to it.  Not sure why breakfast got missed.  So tired, sleepy, just kept passing it by, as it sat brewing on the counter.  I refreshed it a bit, with boiling water.  It was warm, needed to be warmer to take the cold cream... at least without becoming cold.  I like a warm breakfast, it helps in the cool.

The thermometer reads 40 out there, 38 to 40.  But the water isn't thawing.  It's a very cold 40.  I wonder what the barometric pressure is?  That might be the problem.  Bitter chill cold out there, for some reason.  Still, all is good.  Oddly, the rabbits are all still good with food, mostly.  One, out in the shed, is eating way too much?  Dunno.  She has become... strange.

Ah, remembered to call the VA.  First, to make sure the appointment is by phone, tomorrow.  Not going in until they quit with genocide and the mask.  I fear them trying funny business should I arrive.  And... apparently I am far from the only one.  The woman I spoke with suggested she is bombarded with calls, making sure it is by phone.  I think they have stopped testing everyone going in, which was as sure to be wrong as to be... wrong.  But they still have the mask and are still pushing the clot-shot, even offering it to vets who aren't disabled or otherwise involved, their spouses, and some caretakers.  The VA doesn't do anything that costs them money.  So... they are being paid to give people shots.  Enough to have staff dedicated to it.

Then I called for medications.  Refills on the way, or so I was told.  All good.

I am guessing it is becoming a lonely place to work.  The only people coming in have been 'vaxxed.  And they are coming in for covid and offshoot things, from being 'vaxxed.  The unvaxxed know better than to go in.  The 'vaxxed only go in with no choice.  I would rather die at home, their treatments are more lethal than the so-called disease, and their 'vaxxes are even worse.  I have to wonder how many doctors and nurses who got the 'vaxxes actually gave each other saline... or just signed on the lines without even that.  

What bothers me, is how they can continue to give the shot, knowing how bad it really is?  Nurses can be pushed and shoved, and often cave.  But doctors?  Is there enough money it if for them to soothe their consciences?  There is ignorance.  But, at this point, not even willful ignorance can cover that gap.  They have to know.  And children?  The level of evil is impressive.  Though, no matter how tricky it seems, everyone who took it, took it completely by choice.  So far.  Australia is leading the way, probably, in the other direction.  Austria too, perhaps.

Still, now I have... most things arranged.  I have one last task, for the year, then, perhaps, I can, sort of, just crash for the winter.  One more thing, or small group of things.  Ugh.  Bleh.  Blah.  Ekh.  Oh... I could go on with those.  So tired, but not quite sleepy.  Later.

When to bed?

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I think, as it ended, a few minutes after midnight.  I had been heading to bed by 22:30, giver or take.  It just... took a while.  Now, I had two naps yesterday, I think?  I sure thought so.  Plus dozing in the chair fairly often, which I have never done before to memory.  Oh, I glide, in time, in thought.  But never have I slept sitting up.  Didn't even know I could do that.

Awake at 09:57.  A bit surprised I slept in so long, after so much sleep yesterday.  But, so be it.  Good prayers before bed, and a morning remembrance.  I still think many fear Christ because of what happened to Him, or what they feel they owe, or their fear of death which He illuminates plainly.  But it's not like that.  If a school is locked down, then becomes engulfed in fire, and the janitor opens the doors, but dies doing so, it was a gift, not a debt.  

There is hope you learn from the gift, but it isn't ever meant to be a cudgel.  It was a trick I had to... sort out myself.  It isn't even about who is deserving.  That's... just not it.  Anyway... I remembered priorities, of which I am not really one.  The world around me at least righteous obligations, duties, promises, those in my care, people in general, perhaps my maintenance and upkeep.  But I am not the one.  Just... another.  Amen.  Actually, in many ways, like the Janitor.  Only, playing my part.

I'll get food going shortly.  But get chores first thing.  When I can, in a few.  I have electrolytes going down, meds to be with it... done, actually.  I decided to take blood sugar, which is 217 fasting.  My last check was 105, at 22:45 last night.  Still not quite getting why blood sugar is so high.  It had been coming down.  I am not eating anything unusual these last few days.  Many days I am eating less than 1k calories.  I have a limit of well over 2k, at a moderate weight loss level.  Bleh.

Well, waterers were filled, as well.  I'll get to chores soon.  Then, hopefully, fill those waterers right away.  I keep trying to get ahead, so I'll have, say, three days ready.  It just hasn't been happening.  It is 34 out there, and maybe warming.  But it does look like it froze pretty hard last night.

Things are starting.  Later than hoped but on the way.  I'll try to get a few more things done.  I'll keep at it, if just in my mind.  Have a good day.

Feeling better?

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Now I can't sleep.  I feel too much better.  Blood sugar is 106.  No, I stopped dosing, couldn't eat more.  Until just recently.  I had more fatted coffee, walnuts, and pecans.  Raw, between three and four ounces total.  It's... something in.  Didn't dose though, with blood sugar so low.  I only ate because... because.  I felt I should.

Still hoping to get litter, trash, and recycling sorted.  And, maybe, a shower.  Though maybe not.  Feeling good doesn't mean being able.  Yes, I get up and head toward things.  Find myself right back here.  Must almost sleep-walk back.  Don't remember deciding to return.  

Nighttime meds, of all sorts, have been taken.  The clock reads 23:37, but it feels so much later.  I thought it would be three or four, maybe later.  Ugh.  Such a rough one, in some ways.  A very odd thing, today, with blood sugar and sleepiness.  High blood sugar doesn't usually cause sleepiness.  Something bad may have just missed.

Anyway... I'll probably head on to bed, actually, as soon as possible.  Bleh.  If you'd say a prayer that I might get to work, I'd... appreciate it.  Or, just say hello to God for me.  I do, but I like when others remember me to Him.  You'll be in my prayers, either way.  Name-dropped, specific, or general...  Be well, sleep well, amen.

Oddly better.

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I have no really good idea why.  I finally got to chores, fed and watered the rabbits, got fresh water, and will probably refill the few waterers needing it, and refresh the girls water.  There is yet hope that trash and recycling can get gathered and out.  

I had been doing everything I could, to the point of chores, to just stay awake.  There appeared, in my mind, will, a window of opportunity.  I took it as hastily as possible, also feeding the girls while at it.  Strangely, the girls have been as down as I have today.  It isn't just me, which does raise some concerns.

Cat litter, trash, recycling... if possible.  Perhaps a shower.  I keep missing that.  Then again, I am missing almost everything today, and yesterday was rough as well.  There is some hope.

I did have a fatted coffee, and a cheese sandwich.  Not two sandwiches.  Sometimes I can handle two, sometimes it just doesn't go down.  I didn't think this would go down.  Given how little I have eaten today, I would have thought two, and more, would be good.  But, at prep time, I realized that just wasn't so.

Blood sugar is slowly coming down, but not all that well.  Given that I have only eaten three tablespoons of chia, 1/2 tablespoon of flax, three pieces of cheese (at 15 calories per slice), and four pieces of deli ham (at 50 calories), something is off.  I dosed, smaller doses, each time I ate (twice).  From 277, to 240, and now to 204, blood sugar is very oddly still high.  It was 166 fasting, this morning.  Still don't know what happened.  Unless someone is adding something to my food?  Seriously, I don't know what else would do that.

Well, on to... trying to get to a bit more before bedtime.  Good evening, and maybe good night.