Life is a peach.

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Rotted and with a worm in it on some days, fresh ripe and ready for cream as soon as the next day as well. Today life was a fresh ripe peach... with a worm in it.

I did, barely, make it to my appointment on time. I recognized the nurse. She's a cutey pie. About my age, give or take. She had a pony tail today, I think I surprised her by noting her hair difference. It has been a year since I saw her last, or more. No, no more than genial flirtation was in mind, mind you, and even that quite of a friendly nature. She is pretty, and married.

My blood pressure was somewhere between 173/133 and 168/127. No antibiotics were offered as the lung problem, while fluid, does not also seem to be fluid of an infected nature. Why they didn't say that at the ER (more clearly) I do not know. I was led to believe, at the ER, that they simply were not sure what was wrong and that infection might still be a diagnosis. I cannot remember what was suggested as the diagnosis, but the water pill was believed to be the answer. And, since I have been taking that regularly, they are thinking of adding to that dose. The nurse I saw today will call tomorrow with results from the blood draw and I will ask for the diagnosis again, with a pen and paper ready. I am pretty sure if the heart was a problem they would have been harping on that everywhere and always trying to beat the drum to take the medicine they know I can't take. It was something like non-pulmonary edema, though that sounds vague, too vague.

I have decided to not cut off my friendship. Why? *shrug* Just as soon as I think I should do something I listen to some monk and he says... something about the gain being greater than the loss. Further, despite my warrior and animal instincts, I know him to be right. Not that I will not watch my stuff a lot more carefully, not that I just accept, but that this is the price of being more than just an animal. Why oh why do I listen to the Catholic channel (when not blasting heavy metal)? Why, because if I don't I won't hear what I need to hear. That's why. So, I will call my friend and explain that I got too late a start today to pick him up (which is also quite true). And then I will offer to take him to Ogden later this week, when his schedule is clear. No sour grapes, no relenting on my craving for justice, merely an understanding of mercy and a realization of gain that far exceeds material loss. Even if I am going to lose my reputation as a rat bastard. *sigh*

Well, on to... something. I slept as soon as I returned home. I slept well and solidly. I needed that sleep, I was choking on exhaustion up and back though I did stop for groceries on my way home. The cats are pleased. A few days without milk and papa is in the dog house! Now, to finish that stupid reloading station and get it working, do some laundry, and finish the dishes. Doh! I forgot bread!

Blessings. And, later or good night.