Ah-ha!

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There is your problem right there, suggested my smart and wise consciousness. With daylight savings having been set back, Mass and my watch were simply incongruent. I have reset my clocks and watch now. That should help. I didn't find out until I called the lawyer's office. I asked if he was supposed to call me or if I was to call, when told he was not in the office. I said that he was supposed to call at 13:30, but that it was nearly 14:00, and that... The assistant stopped me right there though and told me it was only five before 13:00 "here". Hmm, I'm here I thought for a second. Jean told me, too! She warned us and I simply forgot to follow up on that. No problems, it'll all work out.

I have been thinking about past relationships with women, and crossing the sex line. I still don't have it exactly down, but I think my new take is a bit more certain. You can, and will, as a man, be feminine sometimes. I am not talking gay, I am merely saying that you WILL have feminine traits appear. And, no, women don't like that. They are just as piggish about roles and such as any man, maybe more so. If too they like to venture into the man-world more than men ever like to go into their realm. Anyway, never worry about it. You can do that, and usually scott free if you do it boldly, and heck, enjoy it. What you DON'T want to do is to be too sexy in the wrong way, or more, steal her sexual thunder. This is what she will not tolerate, what will make her hot under the collar. And if you are going to be sexy, bring her into it, make her a part of it, or don't do it. Depending on what you have going. That is more closely aligned with how I understand things.

On another topic, with dreams of war all around, I have been considering things. While it is true that I do not have a solid set of memories from the service, I am pretty sure I never saw combat, not in any official sense. However, I was a warrior my whole life. I was never a general, a grunt, special forces, or an officer in the U.S. military. As my health improves, my ability to see things more clearly comes into play. What I have done is been at war since a very young age. I was a grunt, on those front lines. I was an officer, in that I dealt with adults as such. I was a general in that, once my boots were on the ground in a new area, I began making plans for dealing with whoever might be shown to be a threat. And I was special forces in that I was always operating in enemy territory. There was no way out for me, no where to flee, no safe haven. I was and am all there is, for me. That is the truth of it. I was never at war but I was never at peace, either. That remains. I have known more war than most any soldier. The rest... it was just a means of making sense of all of my life. Putting things into words others could understand, including myself. I have only lost everything, over and over, and been sent back in to do it again. Perhaps, by buying a home and settling in, I might find rest, peace, security, safety, and begin building a life, finally. We will see.

Well, on to other things. I will do what I may today. Lots of big and little things remain. Oh, and one more clock to set. Yeah, and those dishes. I think I can get those kicked out before the call. Afterward I need to get the paperwork to the post office and send it out today. What I will do after that, I can't be sure. I might just check on my friend. Shooting, shopping, or even a meal. Getting him and myself out, again.

Good day.