.
.
Several, actually. Did I hear you grumble, too, Desert Cat? No, not calling you an interloper, it just seemed that one of the allowed had a bit of a fit. Might have been foam though. Or no one, you know how these notions work.
Whatever the case, I felt some one else, an interloper, about eat their tongue yelling at me for putting up something so horrible on Christmas. To which I reminded them a)it was Christmas eve and b)that they had broken into my mindspace on the eve of one of the most holy of my days. There is no cause for that, no matter if they think they are doing God's bidding, tending my health, protecting the nation, or whatever lame excuse they might provide. I don't know if they received my thoughtblast, but it was sent without any regrets. I won't back down from that now. Okay... later I felt something, but not sure if if was from the interloper... I suspect, but there are several sources that it could have come from. Actually, someone was tickling my feet. Yes, I am crazy. But, that doesn't mean it's not true. Not being sure if it was an attack, I sent "hungry, very hungry" back at them. Got tickled again, in several parts of my foot, and on my arm. Truly, a tickle, giggled did I! So sent "extra, extremely, hungry"... and as an extra, "horny", back at them. Tickling stopped. Might just be nerve damage from diabetes, but I've never felt anything like that without someone physically tickling my feet. Wasn't the cats, either.
Gah! I hope it wasn't my mom tickling my feet! How do I even think such things. Soap, toothbrush, eyeballs. *scrub, scrub, moan, scrub*
Oh, never mind. I just.... it's a diary, not necessarily the truth. Perceptions, thoughts, wonders, worries. Choose to believe as you wish. Even when I am sure about something, like being tickled of mind, I'm probably more in agreement that it isn't possible. A bastard in every way, neither this nor that, if actually possibly both, in truth. :p Tic-tac-toe. We win! And lose.
Crazy, baby. :) Later.
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Something foam wrote, in a comment, made me realize to write something. "I'm really too short to ride this ride. But, I stand on tippy toes and cheat and sometimes close my eyes." I did write something in a response comment. I decided to expand on that.
I know it seems terrible, here, at times. Darkness can crowd in, confusion can make things messy, and there I sit. And yet it isn't what it seems. No one was quite made for this ride. The difference is, if it gets too much, you get to close your eyes, duck out for a breath of fresh air, tinker or play or work. This ride is my life. I don't have a way out, closing my eyes does no good, and I can't pray all day and even into my dreams. Just, while you see some hard things here, know that I am probably cutting it, and you can take it or leave it. Just... don't judge.
It's not me, or what I wish, always, just bits of what I see. I enjoy the company, when it is to be had. I understand when company splits as well. It really isn't for entertainment purposes, if it isn't necessarily fact, only, again, what I see, hear, feel, taste, touch, think... perhaps imagine. So, as long as we understand, should be good.
Christmas Eve, about 5:30 AZ time, in candlelight service, you came to mind and I sent some of the Gold of heaven your way with a prayer.
ReplyDeleteRather odd that it affected you so negatively...
...
...
>:(
NUTS to that, man!
ReplyDelete*I* was not thinking about you at all up until the *second* the Lord Himself opened that 100 megawatt channel. You been listening to the shadowed cobwebs of your "uncles" a bit much lately? I'd very much imagine THEY would be the ones discombobulated and wroth by the likes of what The Annointed One chose to send your way that evening, mm? Perhaps they absorbed the brunt and didn't let a peep of what it actually was through to you...
You rather listen to their bullshit murmurings? I'll close up all channels. You just let me know.
pissed...
And no, none of whatever you allegedly sent back, reached me. Forget not in Whom I abide.
ReplyDeleteI did not appreciate the little eye-trap you set with your "uncle's" help in one of the previous posts, however.
About 6:30 EST I was at a candlelight service. It was absolutely beautiful. My mind often wanders during a church service, but not this one...that I was aware of anyway. I hope you had some peace today?
ReplyDeleteFor stat purposes.. I was here early this morning, 6 am or so. This is my 2nd visit today. I was to tired to comment this morning. Am almost to tired now.
G'night, Doomster.
Desert Cat,
ReplyDeleteOne of us wrote or read completely wrong. If anything, your heaven send kept me from hitting a bottom note. Trust me, while there were problems, there was good mojo too. A winter wonderland.
Trust me, the bad was not from you. I was, however, just curious if someone had a slight yowl from that post. Not to be conflated with anger at me.
foam,
I had much peace today, foam. And, actually, for most of Christmas. Just some nosy uninvited (not looking at you or Desert Cat), and a touch of the celebration blues, but nothing too serious.
That warning seems terrible, but for those who shouldn't be here, it really was just a notification that... what I say here, for those who don't abide God, will... be rough.
Oh, and Desert Cat? This was much later in the evening. Remember, the time printed on my posts is two hours off, at the least. And... gets even odder at times. I've tried to change it, fix it, but I think google is keeping a two hour window, so that it can pull everything if the government decides some news should not be broadcast and wants to erase a couple of hours.
ReplyDelete