Up!

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Did a few morning chores already.  Including feeding Sassy.  Up so late, comparatively, that feeding her is... sort of right?  I try to be fair, if my schedule is crashing or exploding.  I think this one is an explosion, as my day was vastly longer, so hers was too.  Nothing much, but breakfast, as well, will be ready shortly.  Back to chia, because it is easy.  If I really want to get fried bacon and eggs back on the menu, say every other day?  Then, maybe add something else in?  Something like that.

Down, I think, in the end, a bit after 23:00.  Up at a bit after 04:00?  I can't... be sure.  I was certain it read 04:22 when coming down, but after fifteen to twenty minutes of this and that, at the very least, it is reading 04:28 currently.  Unless the clocks are really off?  But they are both radio-tied, to the nuclear clock in... what... Colorado?  I don't think I have seen either of them off by even a minute, both being digital and updating several times a day, perhaps several times an hour?  Anyway, there it is, as much as I know.

Ah, I had to laugh.  They don't seem to really believe that I know they read here.  Or... did at one time.  They seemed to have gone away for a while.  But, yea, I know they have ready much of what I have written.  I also know what they have read.  There is no... secret, about anything, from me.  Who... do they think I am.  I really do see.  I don't even need to poke around in the electronics, if they hide well in that anyway.  I have found no tracks, but I see it in their eyes.  Knew it... highly suspected it... before that though.

If you don't like what you read, you can stop reading here.  As well, If anything I have written here disqualifies me, say so.  I would, temporarily, accept such.  If, too, I would fight it.  Not... to reenter the group.  Being cast out, one does not fight to return.  Merely to clear... access... to, potentially, another crew.  I get it, I really do.  But, read another man's mind... or whatever the heck I may or may not be, and... expect some things you really don't like.  Amen.  Just... reminding.

Today?  A shower, as soon as possible.  And, yes, I think I'll try to make this a minor work day.  Dishes, set up a couple of pans of those.  Laundry, see what else I can get going, finish.  I may see about getting the last of the rabbits breeding.  I like doing that on the days between fresh feeding, feeding and watering them every other day.  Then again, as things heat up, watering may have to, again, become daily.

Out of the grave, every time I leave home.  It really is like crawling out of the grave.  To get clean, shaven if possible.  Then dressed, making sure I have my keys and wallet.  It's a lot of work.  For me.  Weather is usually against me.  Too cold, slowing everything, or too hot, making the effort oppressive.  I am almost always very tired, sore, uncomfortable.  My feet might well be swollen, or sore from having been swollen.  My eyes are often bloodshot, especially if I have had to push my days and nights around.  They have no idea.  I probably shouldn't tell them.  I think, at our relative ages, while I might be a bit of an outlier, that is as good as it is going to get, and it is only going to get more difficult.  Which... is why I am trying to push back into it.  One last attempt at grasping straws.  Curious if it will work out.  I have hope, and a plan.  It's not much, but is much better than simple wishes.

Oh, but I have fresh veggies, and salad, plus roast to warm.  And gravy.  It's... been a while.  Further, I am trying to stay spending, just enough, that I have a few dollars to transfer to savings at the end of the month.  No promises, but... that is the hope.  Actually, I... need to be more careful.  But, the last few months, I have been trying to improve my larder.  Hard times, of scarcity, are coming.  A can of food, a day, with even if carby grains or potato powder or beans... enough for six months, maybe a year?  Will ease the... difficulty.  Now, if I can get to, essentially, a meal and an half, per day, of cans... plus an equal amount of grains and such... for a year?  I'll be as golden as possible.  Though, in truth, as a single man, I wouldn't be able to keep it, possibly, in a major disruption.  And, yes, that is coming.  Or is already here but people don't realize it.  

I suppose I should forgo savings, but... I have some hope, too.  That is more hope, than anything.  For, one of the first things they may well do is start stealing money right out of accounts.  Literally burning our money, the little people's money, in order to try to save their riches.  It... won't work.  We really don't have enough to even give them another flight on their personal jet, let alone pay for the french maid service(tm) or onboard chef even.  Mock me?  At your peril.  You... may consider yourself warned.  May not come to pass, but, as suggested, is probably not only already here, but well in progress.  Being pseudo rich, with friends in high places, will not help you.

A few more months of extra stocking?  Probably from now on, if in slightly lesser amounts.  Gearing to a bit more of a balance between savings and stocking up.  Though a lot of things not available at the store were things people had pulled back from buying.  Some of it is because of other food offerings, if much of it is from a lack of means.  I am pulling teeth to get by, I can only imagine if I had even a twenty or thirty mile, or more, commute per day.  Ugh.  Gas is murder, $4.60 yesterday, here.  I... just got a few gallons.  It's what I feel I can afford.  I like to keep it above half, but... feel I don't dare.  It would just be stolen, at this point.  I'm not going to feed whoever wants to take it, or not much.  Blood from a rock, it's all I can do.  Living single, I can't secure anything.  I couldn't even save my ducks from random slaughter.  Or my rabbits from harassments.

It is 40 out there.  I would open the front door, as with the windows.  But that would make it too cool, cold even.  As is, it is 67 here in the front room, and actually in both other areas.  Hmm... the front door IS open, a crack.  I forgot.  :p  Oh well.  On to waking, then a shower, dishes, and whatever else I can try to do.  Later.