.
Between one and two? Half after two? Some time in there. Down at 18:xx, I think. I didn't make it to 19:00. Perhaps the middling in there. Sleep was good, warm. That's always a good thing. Cold sleep is terrible. I wake up sore most days, but often get beyond it to some small degree. Or not. Sometimes I am sore for days or weeks at a time.
The only thing currently continuing to cause problems is the big toe. But that is improving. Still can't walk on it well, not fully, directly. But I can limp a bit better. All good. This morning I put warm things on immediately, from the base layer to socks, shoes, and other warm things. Hoping to take another shower today, but until I am in doing that, I'll... dress warmly. I don't want to freeze while hoping to take a shower, which never gets taken. And, this time, I'll dry off much more thoroughly, so as to dry fully and dress again much more quickly.
Wearing shoes helps with walking, both directly and indirectly. So I'll continue that. As well, it helps me stay warmer. I don't like wearing shoes in the house, but... it's how it goes.
I hate it when I don't dress, hoping to take a shower, then end up freezing all day. Same with drying off. Even if I turn the furnace to 77, I'm cold without enough clothes these days. Elevation, and... other factors. Dry as a bone here, but... that doesn't seem to matter. Could only imagine what it would be like in a very humid elevated region, but I'd guess it would be frigid most of the time. Even when it is, by thermometer, warm to hot. Something about the thinnes of the air means the temp just isn't the same as flatlanders know it.
Though, honestly, wherever I might end up going, longer term, I would rather be at a higher altitude... between five and ten k feet elevation. Something about it is good for me. In spite if it supposed to be a cause for problems with people with my conditions? Yeah. But I'm just not standard equipment, or they don't know what they are talking about.
I've been thinking about the wound clinic. I won't go back. Since I rejected their offer of a woman, one of theirs that is single, and solidly rejected, I started getting a secondary wound on my leg. The nurses/techs were causing the wound. It has completely cleared up since I stopped going.
Just like, with the swimming pool I had joined. When I rejected that woman, they started stealing my gas. Why can't they just accept that a woman, of a certain age, simply isn't interesting to men... of any age. We would rather go it alone than to bother with a woman who has all of the problems, but can't have children, of any other woman? No, not interested. Hurt your feelings? How many men's feeling have you hurt in your youthful rampage, trying to find the richest, fittest, most easy to manipulate man you could pown?
Now I'm good enough? No, it doesn't work that way. Have to laugh. But, will definitely be canceling that appointment. Look, if you hit thirty? If you haven't hit the wall? You are about to. If you are still fertile? Best figure it out and get busy. And that means taking what is on offer, and abiding him. If you are infertile or older? Best look for a man much older. Consider it sort of inverted dog or cat years. Men stop aging, or it slows for us greatly. Not so much for women. Of course, a man would have be able to afford you, and be willing to do so. But... that is how it works. The hard, cold, dark, mean truth of life. You had your chance. I hope you enjoyed picking your favorites from the boxes of chocolates. But it's over. Now it's men's time to be picky. Very, very, intensely, scrutinizingly, picky. Meh.
But, we, it seems, have to avoid women. Professional, medical, or any such. If we reject their offers, they will attempt to damage, poison, infect, damage us. So be it. Yes, I'll call later today. Get that canceled.
Later.
Stayed up way later than I should, sun was down, slept (couple quick wakeups) until 08:07. 0900 appointment for the dealership to pick up my truck for a recall(and oil change as long as they have it) 10:00 rolls by, "excuses" 11:00 they're gone... Customer non-service... Just tell me the truth, I'm not a child, don't lie to me.
ReplyDeleteI haven't been paying attention to the "women" until you mentioned it months ago. I lost enough weight that my wedding ring slips off on its own, so I don't wear it. I'm "unbranded". Maybe it's confirmation bias, but, I'm picking up on the little "Tells" lingering eye contact, "that look", glance to my left hand, friendly almost forced smile, that look of fear, hope, longing, and sometimes pleading look. "take me away from this" asking about my weekend plans, one even called me "young man" but unless she was well (very well) preserved, I had at least a decade on her. Commonalities: white- aging rocker chicks, tats, chemically destroyed hair, (not many face piercings thank you) raspy smokers voice. Exactly what I'd have been chasing 20-30 years ago, now, not much at all. I've moved on.
Ethnic-(hispanic/dot indian) younger friendlier but less flirtatious, still the look in the eyes, searching begging, lost. I have a daughter and I'd be heartbroken if I ever saw that "empty" look in her eyes. These are also more either no visible tats, or lots of bad quality "gang" tats.
Aside: I have no ink (Navy???, nope none) My wife ,daughter, and oldest son all are inked, youngest son, I don't know.
Back to the womenz... Sum up. I've definitely noticed the signs. Maybe It'd be fun to throw out a line with bait, just to see what happens, I could throw them back like they did to countless other men. Nah, why risk hurting anyone else, my emotions I control, others not so much. They can search elsewhere, or, be aggressive and say it out loud, the time for games and romance is over. Why did I pound all this out aboot a subject that means nothing to me. I have enough crazy women in my life, I don't need more. Peace.
Wait until you let one know you aren't interested. Even if she does nothing, her friends may well. Watch it, there. Hungry? Aye. Starving, for something, anything.
ReplyDeleteI don't hate them, I simply have no use for them. If I can find a woman, it will a foreign woman, in a foreign land. Good looking, slim, able and willing to be a housewife and mother. That doesn't exist, in America, for me. And I couldn't afford it, in America, even if I could find it. I won't settle for less.
But, I have learned to look for that smoking hatred, after rejecting a woman out of hand, and printing here about it. Just... watch your back. Some of them have gone full on feral. They simply hate men, especially if you give them no thought. That's almost worse than my rejection. Though, depends on the day? *grins*
Dealerships, stores, medical, many professions... while always somewhat dubious, have gone completely off the track. Good for nothing, or worse... a risk to employ. I have found a private service for auto work. I stay away from hospitals, dealerships, and lots of things. Unfortunately, I can't do everything myself. We'll see if Trump can turn any of it around. I didn't vote for him, he vowed to undo the one thing he actually did get done... or seemed to intend to do so. But he didn't build the wall, even when given a green light and the ability to take the funding. Lots of things he blew, and much of what he did was exec orders. So... patched in the next day of the Biden steal. Which... I almost think was like the plandemic, a part of the plan he was in on? Suspicious.
Maybe not even a bad plan, if getting back was possible. And it seems so. But elected or selected? Bah!
Anyway... we'll see. Even if he only improves things for a few years, that's as good as can be hoped with a wheeler and a dealer.