.
.
And it always turns out, if not always how you planned, hoped, worked... Yes, as it turns out...
While it was suggested that my other friend would not be going to the SLC area today, as his friend, who was supposed to be released today had been set to not be released until tomorrow... from another hospital... Well. It turns out that he will be being released, and at mid-day, likely at noon. Right. He called and... my phone has been forgotten in the other room. I didn't hear either call. I did get the messages. Our mutual friend, however, was called. But he was a bit out of it. When asked about me, he thought I was going to moving the hospital buildings around. And, while that may or may not be, I had not discussed this with him previously. :p
Now, after I realized I had been called, listened to the messages, and got a handle on the data, I called back. There is no way I could have gotten ready, by that point. And he had already, of course, being 10:30, taken off. I would have needed a shower and all. However, this is all actually pretty good. Being that the release was noon, there was little likelihood that we could have visited our mutual friend, and picked up his other friend. And a visit after picking up his friend would be unlikely. He, too, is in bad shape and needs to return home.
Which means there is some better chance of taking single vehicles, splitting some costs, and not needing to rush up and back. All assuming our mutual friend is able to have visitors. To know this, I will need to call the hospital and his sister, and find out what I can. I could call him, but he wouldn't be all that helpful. And probably wouldn't quite know who I am. He might not even when we visit, but that is something else. Yeah, well... Two guys with really bad hearts trying to manage visiting two ill friends. Time runs oddly, pushing isn't always possible, and it is tricky. Still... it's what we can and wish to do.
I think I'll make an omelet, have a spot of coffee, fresh if possible, let that settle, then make an attempt at figuring out contacts and trying to stay up to make it a full day. I am feeling better. But this is the latter part of the day, which is always a time to begin slowing down. Not bad though. And I think I can have things arranged before too long, and make those calls, eat some food, and maybe get another shower in. I just need something to make me work and I can then get to more than I thought, by far. Later.
Monday, November 9, 2015
As things find their place.
.
.
I can't be sure if these things are mood music, or salves for healing, or expressions of pains recently felt or soon perhaps to be known. I only know they seem to work. Enjoy, or... something... as you may.
.
I can't be sure if these things are mood music, or salves for healing, or expressions of pains recently felt or soon perhaps to be known. I only know they seem to work. Enjoy, or... something... as you may.
It sometimes amazes me.
.
.
How can I go from being in horrible shape, being confused and distraught, to hitting a stride that is as good as it gets. A few days back on meds, mostly, and I am like a new man. Yeah, medicines can help, especially as I have arranged them. Doctors can't be left to their own devices, but if they offer certain medicines, and you use due diligence, figuring what works with what they offer and your body, plus obtains the numbers they are looking for, you... well... you won't walk out of this alive, but you might just live a little longer and more meaningfully. But you have to do your part. Given, if you are ill enough, sometimes, all on your own, you won't always be able to do your part. A helping hang really would be good. No less than if you are well. A helping hand is something we all need from time to time.
I have been messing with my foot as well. No matter how good I was beginning to feel, if I couldn't put my foot in socks and a boot or shoe, it simply wouldn't matter. And, until yesterday, that wasn't possible. After another shower, and letting that soak, then spending a good deal of time figuring out what hurt, and why, I did a bit of doctoring. I found that the major problem was a cuticle spike. I was able to gently trim that so as to be able to bandage it. After that worked for a while, I added a sock. All good. It looks like I should be able to travel, as a driver or passenger. Next is to figure out when, where, and how. I might even try to locate lodging and stay a few days. You don't know what it's like to be that close to death and all alone. I do. His sister may be there, but it's nice to see other faces, especially if this is going to be his time. I don't like that, but... I think I can handle that now. He won't just become a ghost without a name and face now, either. If that's how it goes. It's the nameless and faceless ones that... are the problem.
I have also been trying to push my days and nights into correct order. Waking at midnight doesn't sound great, but it should give me an easy to noon, and a little more drawn out until 18:00~20:00. That should be enough for a trip, finding lodging, and crashing... then daily visits for a bit. So much work for such a simple seeming thing. It feels like I am running through mud, sand, and water. But it is coming together. And it isn't killing me, it's bringing me back from my own edge.
Anyway, that is how things are going. I might head out to grab a meal, then tinker on the machine to keep life going. I called the other friend, who may be traveling with me, or vice versa, or we may go down as a minor convoy. No answer. Then again, I wasn't sure there would be. Late as it is. I'll try at 6:00, then 8:00, and if need be 10:00... the latter would be pushing a trip tomorrow. So after 8:00 I may try to call my ill friend's sister for more information. Yeah... I know. Not sure, yesterday, I could have even planned this out. So, it's good enough to go, if I can find an exact address, visitation times and permission, and perhaps an inexpensive local room to let. I'd do it for any of my folk, if I knew. Later.
.
How can I go from being in horrible shape, being confused and distraught, to hitting a stride that is as good as it gets. A few days back on meds, mostly, and I am like a new man. Yeah, medicines can help, especially as I have arranged them. Doctors can't be left to their own devices, but if they offer certain medicines, and you use due diligence, figuring what works with what they offer and your body, plus obtains the numbers they are looking for, you... well... you won't walk out of this alive, but you might just live a little longer and more meaningfully. But you have to do your part. Given, if you are ill enough, sometimes, all on your own, you won't always be able to do your part. A helping hang really would be good. No less than if you are well. A helping hand is something we all need from time to time.
I have been messing with my foot as well. No matter how good I was beginning to feel, if I couldn't put my foot in socks and a boot or shoe, it simply wouldn't matter. And, until yesterday, that wasn't possible. After another shower, and letting that soak, then spending a good deal of time figuring out what hurt, and why, I did a bit of doctoring. I found that the major problem was a cuticle spike. I was able to gently trim that so as to be able to bandage it. After that worked for a while, I added a sock. All good. It looks like I should be able to travel, as a driver or passenger. Next is to figure out when, where, and how. I might even try to locate lodging and stay a few days. You don't know what it's like to be that close to death and all alone. I do. His sister may be there, but it's nice to see other faces, especially if this is going to be his time. I don't like that, but... I think I can handle that now. He won't just become a ghost without a name and face now, either. If that's how it goes. It's the nameless and faceless ones that... are the problem.
I have also been trying to push my days and nights into correct order. Waking at midnight doesn't sound great, but it should give me an easy to noon, and a little more drawn out until 18:00~20:00. That should be enough for a trip, finding lodging, and crashing... then daily visits for a bit. So much work for such a simple seeming thing. It feels like I am running through mud, sand, and water. But it is coming together. And it isn't killing me, it's bringing me back from my own edge.
Anyway, that is how things are going. I might head out to grab a meal, then tinker on the machine to keep life going. I called the other friend, who may be traveling with me, or vice versa, or we may go down as a minor convoy. No answer. Then again, I wasn't sure there would be. Late as it is. I'll try at 6:00, then 8:00, and if need be 10:00... the latter would be pushing a trip tomorrow. So after 8:00 I may try to call my ill friend's sister for more information. Yeah... I know. Not sure, yesterday, I could have even planned this out. So, it's good enough to go, if I can find an exact address, visitation times and permission, and perhaps an inexpensive local room to let. I'd do it for any of my folk, if I knew. Later.
Saturday, November 7, 2015
Some things known.
.
.
I now know where my friend is, which hospital. In SLC, of course. What is going to be done, or not done, I don't know. It is a valve in his heart. While his family said the doctor hadn't put the nub on the surgery because of smoking, it seems as if that isn't true. I have a second source that seems to confirm that side of the story. The surgeon may simply be refusing to do the surgery because my friend smokes cigarettes. I'm not, myself, convinced there is any connection, especially since the valve problem seems to be congenital/genetic, and not due to smoking. It is medicine deciding to to kill and who to try to save based on external factors. If he was overweight by forty pounds, and the doctor refused to treat him, it would be similar. And, trust me, they will come for all of you, for this or that, if they get away with this. Drink coffee or tea? Eat "health food" that the doctor doesn't approve (potentially even "organic" food)? Eat junk food? Eat meat? Are a vegetarian/vegan? Any of these could be a basis, more so as the government is adding bureaucratic layers, and depending where you live and what the local "norms" are. Just something you best be considering.
The other thing to note, is, as people live longer, there is less concern by the medical field for the elderly. Some will argue that this is practical. And, maybe, it is. Faith in God, however, isn't practical... on a purely science based world, either. Then again, neither is science, since most even it has to be taken on faith since none can know even enough to be sure about the practices in their own field, even if they are the top of their field. I would rather put more faith in life, and take the risks, and treat seniors, children, and others, than to just surrender. Unfortunately I have no access to medical ethics panels, aka death panels. They were already being put in place before Zerocare. Zerocare just gave those the Stalinist stamp of approval to murder whoever they saw fit. Damned practical. God damned, as well.
In any case, there is a chance that a visit might be figured out Monday. If they will be doing the operation, probably, that would happen Wednesday. (All according to what I have heard, which is second or third hand, perhaps more, depending on how you count things.) Still, there is some hope. I would just figure out how to drive down, but there is a good chance they wouldn't even let me visit him without family clout. Yes, there are ways to work around even that, if weekends make that much more difficult. Bleh. A bit frustrated, but at least it looks like a plan is coming together. Just that he is still alive, and in some sort of supervised care, leaves some hope about how things will turn out.
Ah, the computer has been just sitting there as my mind has been elsewhere and my body has been repairing... I haven't been walking as much. Oh... and I realized, finally, that I haven't been taking medication since I dropped that one recent time. I wrote that I would be getting back to it, but that never happened. I started medicine again two days ago, minus insulin so far, mostly. Bleh. I'll keep at it. But that does explain some things. Sometimes that hurts terribly, but being broken up and interrupted, as well as not having much and resupply lines being highly questionable, it's... it's been difficult and I was already suffering so it mostly went unnoticed. Yeah.
Later.
.
I now know where my friend is, which hospital. In SLC, of course. What is going to be done, or not done, I don't know. It is a valve in his heart. While his family said the doctor hadn't put the nub on the surgery because of smoking, it seems as if that isn't true. I have a second source that seems to confirm that side of the story. The surgeon may simply be refusing to do the surgery because my friend smokes cigarettes. I'm not, myself, convinced there is any connection, especially since the valve problem seems to be congenital/genetic, and not due to smoking. It is medicine deciding to to kill and who to try to save based on external factors. If he was overweight by forty pounds, and the doctor refused to treat him, it would be similar. And, trust me, they will come for all of you, for this or that, if they get away with this. Drink coffee or tea? Eat "health food" that the doctor doesn't approve (potentially even "organic" food)? Eat junk food? Eat meat? Are a vegetarian/vegan? Any of these could be a basis, more so as the government is adding bureaucratic layers, and depending where you live and what the local "norms" are. Just something you best be considering.
The other thing to note, is, as people live longer, there is less concern by the medical field for the elderly. Some will argue that this is practical. And, maybe, it is. Faith in God, however, isn't practical... on a purely science based world, either. Then again, neither is science, since most even it has to be taken on faith since none can know even enough to be sure about the practices in their own field, even if they are the top of their field. I would rather put more faith in life, and take the risks, and treat seniors, children, and others, than to just surrender. Unfortunately I have no access to medical ethics panels, aka death panels. They were already being put in place before Zerocare. Zerocare just gave those the Stalinist stamp of approval to murder whoever they saw fit. Damned practical. God damned, as well.
In any case, there is a chance that a visit might be figured out Monday. If they will be doing the operation, probably, that would happen Wednesday. (All according to what I have heard, which is second or third hand, perhaps more, depending on how you count things.) Still, there is some hope. I would just figure out how to drive down, but there is a good chance they wouldn't even let me visit him without family clout. Yes, there are ways to work around even that, if weekends make that much more difficult. Bleh. A bit frustrated, but at least it looks like a plan is coming together. Just that he is still alive, and in some sort of supervised care, leaves some hope about how things will turn out.
Ah, the computer has been just sitting there as my mind has been elsewhere and my body has been repairing... I haven't been walking as much. Oh... and I realized, finally, that I haven't been taking medication since I dropped that one recent time. I wrote that I would be getting back to it, but that never happened. I started medicine again two days ago, minus insulin so far, mostly. Bleh. I'll keep at it. But that does explain some things. Sometimes that hurts terribly, but being broken up and interrupted, as well as not having much and resupply lines being highly questionable, it's... it's been difficult and I was already suffering so it mostly went unnoticed. Yeah.
Later.
Friday, November 6, 2015
Attempting change.
.
.
Attempting change? Or attempting to alter the change that is happening already? The latter, I think. Have you ever been stuck. You try to go one way. If that fails, you try to go the other way. If neither works after several attempts, you may begin an attempt to rock back and forth, or push, pull, press, tighten. Anything to get out of what is becoming claustrophobic. I haven't, exactly, had great success. I will keep at it.
On top of that, I found out that my big toe has not healed. It has merely stopped throbbing pain in the form of massive bolts of electrical PAIN every few to quarter seconds. And I can walk. Swelling went down. But touching the top of it... reminds me what I escaped. My toe cuticles can become like razor blades. While kept down (short, not far off my toe), mostly, that cuticle had hardened. It's more like a three-way blade, with one of the blades coming off the toe, the other two split to either side of the vertical one, on the horizontal plain. Now, whatever else happened, some large part of that cuticle was broken loose. So touching it moves the skin, broken off the toe with the cuticle, causing some serious pain. However, the bruise/sprain part is better, so long as I don't bump it... which... after a small error, I assure you I don't. And I can walk on it without yowling. Yeah, I'm a big baby on this. Shut that. I handle many pains quite well, and can ignore many. This is one of my kryptonites. So... I'm not quite sure how to do more to treat it.
I did stay awake long enough to call the middle friend about the other friend. No one answered. I will keep trying. I'm not sure which hospital he is in. Learning that I will call to find out if he can have visitors and what times are best. I know what it's like to be in a hospital alone. I even know what it is like to die alone. I am hoping to cut some of that out for him. Hmm... might have to see if reading, or a game item, or something, might help him soak up time. Though if he is in really bad shape, there might not be much to do. Still, I can visit more often, maybe read to him if that helps. I just have to, literally and figuratively, work out how to get back on my feet, and figure out where and when. Fighting through fog of health and pain of body and some tricky things.
Later.
.
Attempting change? Or attempting to alter the change that is happening already? The latter, I think. Have you ever been stuck. You try to go one way. If that fails, you try to go the other way. If neither works after several attempts, you may begin an attempt to rock back and forth, or push, pull, press, tighten. Anything to get out of what is becoming claustrophobic. I haven't, exactly, had great success. I will keep at it.
On top of that, I found out that my big toe has not healed. It has merely stopped throbbing pain in the form of massive bolts of electrical PAIN every few to quarter seconds. And I can walk. Swelling went down. But touching the top of it... reminds me what I escaped. My toe cuticles can become like razor blades. While kept down (short, not far off my toe), mostly, that cuticle had hardened. It's more like a three-way blade, with one of the blades coming off the toe, the other two split to either side of the vertical one, on the horizontal plain. Now, whatever else happened, some large part of that cuticle was broken loose. So touching it moves the skin, broken off the toe with the cuticle, causing some serious pain. However, the bruise/sprain part is better, so long as I don't bump it... which... after a small error, I assure you I don't. And I can walk on it without yowling. Yeah, I'm a big baby on this. Shut that. I handle many pains quite well, and can ignore many. This is one of my kryptonites. So... I'm not quite sure how to do more to treat it.
I did stay awake long enough to call the middle friend about the other friend. No one answered. I will keep trying. I'm not sure which hospital he is in. Learning that I will call to find out if he can have visitors and what times are best. I know what it's like to be in a hospital alone. I even know what it is like to die alone. I am hoping to cut some of that out for him. Hmm... might have to see if reading, or a game item, or something, might help him soak up time. Though if he is in really bad shape, there might not be much to do. Still, I can visit more often, maybe read to him if that helps. I just have to, literally and figuratively, work out how to get back on my feet, and figure out where and when. Fighting through fog of health and pain of body and some tricky things.
Later.
One of those calls.
.
.
A friend called sometime today. I just checked, saw a message, and listened. My friend is in the hospital and it isn't looking good. I am going to have to figure out how to be awake at the right time to call back, figure things out, and get in to the hospital. A simple visit at least, though I will check to see if there is anything he needs while I am there. He had a minor stroke recently. I don't know if this is related to that or something else. I'm not good with these sorts of things, but I have improved. So... tomorrow? I am hoping.
To get my mind off that, since I can't do much about it, I messed with the keyboard for the new system, rechecked plugs, unplugged some things from the motherboard that aren't required yet, and am about to take the monitor I am using to type this post in and set it up for an initial post attempt. If that goes well, then I break it all down while figuring out how to install it all into the case, in the same simple configuration, hook everything back up, and attempt a post in the case... or I troubleshoot until I can get a post or figure out what is wrong and begin dealing with that.
I may take a shower or bath first though. If I can get it to post, I will head in for a bite and see about some of the items I want/need. Walmart probably won't carry what I need. And yet it is worth a shot. With my time off.. Even if I get in to town tomorrow, I don't know if I will be able to go shopping on top of it, being that it will be a very harsh change in my schedule. Hmm... I ought to see if the fellow who called wants to go along when I go in to see the friend he called about. Yeah, I'll ask when I speak with him.
Yeah, well, I'll do what I can. Later.
.
A friend called sometime today. I just checked, saw a message, and listened. My friend is in the hospital and it isn't looking good. I am going to have to figure out how to be awake at the right time to call back, figure things out, and get in to the hospital. A simple visit at least, though I will check to see if there is anything he needs while I am there. He had a minor stroke recently. I don't know if this is related to that or something else. I'm not good with these sorts of things, but I have improved. So... tomorrow? I am hoping.
To get my mind off that, since I can't do much about it, I messed with the keyboard for the new system, rechecked plugs, unplugged some things from the motherboard that aren't required yet, and am about to take the monitor I am using to type this post in and set it up for an initial post attempt. If that goes well, then I break it all down while figuring out how to install it all into the case, in the same simple configuration, hook everything back up, and attempt a post in the case... or I troubleshoot until I can get a post or figure out what is wrong and begin dealing with that.
I may take a shower or bath first though. If I can get it to post, I will head in for a bite and see about some of the items I want/need. Walmart probably won't carry what I need. And yet it is worth a shot. With my time off.. Even if I get in to town tomorrow, I don't know if I will be able to go shopping on top of it, being that it will be a very harsh change in my schedule. Hmm... I ought to see if the fellow who called wants to go along when I go in to see the friend he called about. Yeah, I'll ask when I speak with him.
Yeah, well, I'll do what I can. Later.
Thursday, November 5, 2015
Weird.
.
.
That toe I told you about? Yeah, well, it is healed. I swear it looked like the knuckle was turning, darkening, heading toward black. I banged it solidly. That is a very rare occurrence, thankfully, but I guess it was time. Beside the knuckle, I had somehow terribly ripped the cuticle. Don't ask, I don't know how that all happened. Or even, exactly, when. I was nearly sleep walking, and realized a few seconds after that I had done something not good. I did bandage it, and have changed that, and take bandages off at night often, to let them breath. And, after trying to ignore it for the previous day, I decided to put a pillow under that foot and be careful with it. Today it is as if nothing happened. The bruising is gone, the pain is gone. I'm not sure if the cuticle is still sore, though when I take a bath I will explore that. Strange. Oh, and I can walk without that odd limp that was becoming more required than not. Very odd.
Today I am hoping to simply work on the machine, take a shower, and do a bit of cleaning. There is some chance of working my day around and getting out. Most likely, however, I will try to find some phone numbers and let some people know some things. Life is still a bit crazy lately, but it'll do.
I have to admit, the more I work on this machine, the more sure I am that I didn't make a mistake with that first machine. I am beginning to believe the guy who sold me the parts sold me bad parts. Between greed and wanting to build the computers himself, he discouraged others. And, yes, I can see it. I was, and am, very careful with how power supplies are connected, which cable goes where, and such. That hasn't changed. Either that or the parts were bad, and since he liked building, he just used that as an excuse to take over the project. There isn't much you can get wrong without forcing things. And I simply don't. He never did say what was wrong, and I was naive enough to believe him. I really hate the things people do.
Anyway... I am hoping to do one more check, then attempt a post yet tonight. If it posts, I will go from there. A case install of just the main parts, then another attempt to post to make sure everything is right in there, then the remainder of the build... though I need a few things to complete it... a sata III card and a few more sata cords, possibly a few extensions. When it is in the case I can check more carefully and make a final list of final needs. Later.
.
That toe I told you about? Yeah, well, it is healed. I swear it looked like the knuckle was turning, darkening, heading toward black. I banged it solidly. That is a very rare occurrence, thankfully, but I guess it was time. Beside the knuckle, I had somehow terribly ripped the cuticle. Don't ask, I don't know how that all happened. Or even, exactly, when. I was nearly sleep walking, and realized a few seconds after that I had done something not good. I did bandage it, and have changed that, and take bandages off at night often, to let them breath. And, after trying to ignore it for the previous day, I decided to put a pillow under that foot and be careful with it. Today it is as if nothing happened. The bruising is gone, the pain is gone. I'm not sure if the cuticle is still sore, though when I take a bath I will explore that. Strange. Oh, and I can walk without that odd limp that was becoming more required than not. Very odd.
Today I am hoping to simply work on the machine, take a shower, and do a bit of cleaning. There is some chance of working my day around and getting out. Most likely, however, I will try to find some phone numbers and let some people know some things. Life is still a bit crazy lately, but it'll do.
I have to admit, the more I work on this machine, the more sure I am that I didn't make a mistake with that first machine. I am beginning to believe the guy who sold me the parts sold me bad parts. Between greed and wanting to build the computers himself, he discouraged others. And, yes, I can see it. I was, and am, very careful with how power supplies are connected, which cable goes where, and such. That hasn't changed. Either that or the parts were bad, and since he liked building, he just used that as an excuse to take over the project. There isn't much you can get wrong without forcing things. And I simply don't. He never did say what was wrong, and I was naive enough to believe him. I really hate the things people do.
Anyway... I am hoping to do one more check, then attempt a post yet tonight. If it posts, I will go from there. A case install of just the main parts, then another attempt to post to make sure everything is right in there, then the remainder of the build... though I need a few things to complete it... a sata III card and a few more sata cords, possibly a few extensions. When it is in the case I can check more carefully and make a final list of final needs. Later.
Well...
.
.
I couldn't sleep. Though getting out probably wouldn't have happened anyway. I stubbed my big toe about as well as a person can. Three hundred pounds, moving quickly but in a sleepy stupor, and a three foot thick stone wall makes for a serious bungle. I knew I hurt it, but thought it would just be better. I avoided putting weight on it, just in case. I don't break bones. I think, thought, that I came about as close to that as I get. Oh, and I ripped the top of it open pretty harshly, somehow. So, for a day or two, I am not going to be getting out. I will changed the bandage occasionally, perhaps take a soak bath a couple of times, and if it doesn't sort out, I may actually find something to use as a bottom splint. Not broken, but I think I bent it far enough back to have hurt the stuff in the knuckle... tendons... ligaments?
The pain has sort of thrown me off my game. I think it was numb for the first half day to day. Now it is screeching. Big baby. It's really starting to hurt. Doesn't look infected, so I am suspect it is just seriously out of shape.
I'll do what I can. With the birds frozen, I am not worried about getting them out in an absolute hurry. Thanksgiving is fine, but Christmas is the traditional time for a goose. Even Thanksgiving isn't too awful close, enough time to heal most likely. Though I might take anicin. If that doesn't work, or the swelling gets worse, I might try that other stuff. Not my favorite, and I don't know that I have seen it work on swelling, but... I might have a chance at an objective observation of it's claimed ability. It is about bedtime now, though some painpills might be required. Good night.
.
I couldn't sleep. Though getting out probably wouldn't have happened anyway. I stubbed my big toe about as well as a person can. Three hundred pounds, moving quickly but in a sleepy stupor, and a three foot thick stone wall makes for a serious bungle. I knew I hurt it, but thought it would just be better. I avoided putting weight on it, just in case. I don't break bones. I think, thought, that I came about as close to that as I get. Oh, and I ripped the top of it open pretty harshly, somehow. So, for a day or two, I am not going to be getting out. I will changed the bandage occasionally, perhaps take a soak bath a couple of times, and if it doesn't sort out, I may actually find something to use as a bottom splint. Not broken, but I think I bent it far enough back to have hurt the stuff in the knuckle... tendons... ligaments?
The pain has sort of thrown me off my game. I think it was numb for the first half day to day. Now it is screeching. Big baby. It's really starting to hurt. Doesn't look infected, so I am suspect it is just seriously out of shape.
I'll do what I can. With the birds frozen, I am not worried about getting them out in an absolute hurry. Thanksgiving is fine, but Christmas is the traditional time for a goose. Even Thanksgiving isn't too awful close, enough time to heal most likely. Though I might take anicin. If that doesn't work, or the swelling gets worse, I might try that other stuff. Not my favorite, and I don't know that I have seen it work on swelling, but... I might have a chance at an objective observation of it's claimed ability. It is about bedtime now, though some painpills might be required. Good night.
Slight change of plans.
.
.
Okay, I did finish the last of the research and feel as if I could attempt to run the machine for the first time. I will check everything, but I won't attempt to post. I want to sleep, and think I can, in order that I might wake earlier tomorrow (this afternoon), deliver some geese, and then if I am doing well enough and all, get to town to look for a few extensions, a few more cords, and a pci-e based sata III card. Then, if I can, I will begin attempting to work the machine through, problem solving as I go. If it all works well, and I find the last of the things I need, perhaps I can even finish the build, or get a good start on it.
.
Okay, I did finish the last of the research and feel as if I could attempt to run the machine for the first time. I will check everything, but I won't attempt to post. I want to sleep, and think I can, in order that I might wake earlier tomorrow (this afternoon), deliver some geese, and then if I am doing well enough and all, get to town to look for a few extensions, a few more cords, and a pci-e based sata III card. Then, if I can, I will begin attempting to work the machine through, problem solving as I go. If it all works well, and I find the last of the things I need, perhaps I can even finish the build, or get a good start on it.
Wednesday, November 4, 2015
How am I feeling?
.
.
On the outside, or how well I can move and do, not the best. Not the worst, simply nothing much to write. On the inside, however...
If I could just write that to a file and export that feel and energy to the outside world... Oh well. I'll enjoy it anyway. *woof!*
.
On the outside, or how well I can move and do, not the best. Not the worst, simply nothing much to write. On the inside, however...
If I could just write that to a file and export that feel and energy to the outside world... Oh well. I'll enjoy it anyway. *woof!*
Awake and awake.
.
.
I kept fussing before going to bed earlier. I was absolutely strung out into exhaustion, but I didn't want the geese to just sit on the porch. Between it still being above freezing and raining off and on, leaving birds outside would not have been wise. And it's a good thing I did force myself to stay awake.
When the geese arrived, I realized I don't have my freezer back in order! Ah, but remember, I purchased that secondary fridge/freezer? Yes. It was still in the garage, in packing. So... I had to, while still in pseudo epileptic fits from exhaustion, cart that thing through the cave, find a place to set it up, unbox it, and figure out the instructions. UGH! A beastly chore but I was not about to allow such precious gifts to go bad.
Relocating the thing was truly a beast. Unpacking it was just as bad. Some things, no matter how strong one is, are one-man jobs. And, yet, that is what I had. A woman can help on these sorts of things, because strength isn't needed for one part, just extra hands and at certain angles. Anyway, I got it moved, unpacked, sorted the interior, plugged it in to get it going, then grabbed the instruction manual. There wasn't much to the instructions, and yet there was a major point. The "FF" (fast freeze), which I really wanted and needed, has a four hour use limit. Ugh... Which meant that, while I could use it to plunge the geese into a solid freeze to initiate the thing, I couldn't go to bed. I figured about an hour up to let the freeze set deeply, then I could set the temp and go on to bed. More than four hours of FF use could damage the cooling system.
After that, I checked on the geese. Still frozen but just. There was no more dry ice, or whatever they used. They must set it to just exactly how much is needed to get to your door. And just that. How much longer it would have stayed frozen I can't say, but surely not through the afternoon. Dang good thing I forced myself to stay awake, then pushed through the work. I checked them, first thing, when I woke. All good. Probably a bit harder frozen than before, but they never even got actually close to feeling thawed. Worry. Those are a small fortune in foul. Still... all good.
Since waking, and while waking, yeah... got to be ^this old to say that... I did a bit more research regarding the i/o connections. I will check it, and the other connections, again. I need to ensure that the power cables are in solid states. Power being quarky is more than likely what will fry a machine. The wrong connection, not all the connections, a short. The wrong device connection could be a problem. But those are pretty difficult to get wrong. It's sort of like trying to use your foot to activate the turn signal. Still, some go that extra mile! Power, however... if it isn't even, and solidly attached, can smoke things. And it can look good and not be good. The again, too much pressure and you can snap boards, causing shorts and other problems. Unlike, say, sockets that are pressure sensitive, there are not rated, controlled, power connection tools. It takes experience, and that sort of experience can be very expensive.
Anyway. I did figure out what I needed. I will look over the connections. And I did look for, and find, sata III pci-e cards. They have them in the $30-$40 range, on up to dedicated raid boards at ten times that base range. I'll be sticking with the $40, though I hope to sift through the offerings to find something that has decent reviews and fewer reported problems. Many seem to have trouble being used for raid. But they would do just fine with the disc players, leaving the native board sata III for the two raid configs I want to arrange. Bleh... so much! Oh, and I will need another couple of sata cables, perhaps a few extensions as well. Baubles to be bought locally. So close, so very close.
If I check the connections, and feel satisfied, I may well end up attempting a post tonight, and working with the bios. Though I have everything needed for minor overclocking, I won't even consider that until I see that everything is running, and well, at basic settings, and for a while. A burn in, benchmarking, OS install, and a few other things first. In time, if all works, and after I have the system, software to hardware, all set up and arranged... and backed up twice over... then I might think about it. That is a while off. But a first stab at getting a solid post, and any troubleshooting, might happen yet tonight.
Later.
.
I kept fussing before going to bed earlier. I was absolutely strung out into exhaustion, but I didn't want the geese to just sit on the porch. Between it still being above freezing and raining off and on, leaving birds outside would not have been wise. And it's a good thing I did force myself to stay awake.
When the geese arrived, I realized I don't have my freezer back in order! Ah, but remember, I purchased that secondary fridge/freezer? Yes. It was still in the garage, in packing. So... I had to, while still in pseudo epileptic fits from exhaustion, cart that thing through the cave, find a place to set it up, unbox it, and figure out the instructions. UGH! A beastly chore but I was not about to allow such precious gifts to go bad.
Relocating the thing was truly a beast. Unpacking it was just as bad. Some things, no matter how strong one is, are one-man jobs. And, yet, that is what I had. A woman can help on these sorts of things, because strength isn't needed for one part, just extra hands and at certain angles. Anyway, I got it moved, unpacked, sorted the interior, plugged it in to get it going, then grabbed the instruction manual. There wasn't much to the instructions, and yet there was a major point. The "FF" (fast freeze), which I really wanted and needed, has a four hour use limit. Ugh... Which meant that, while I could use it to plunge the geese into a solid freeze to initiate the thing, I couldn't go to bed. I figured about an hour up to let the freeze set deeply, then I could set the temp and go on to bed. More than four hours of FF use could damage the cooling system.
After that, I checked on the geese. Still frozen but just. There was no more dry ice, or whatever they used. They must set it to just exactly how much is needed to get to your door. And just that. How much longer it would have stayed frozen I can't say, but surely not through the afternoon. Dang good thing I forced myself to stay awake, then pushed through the work. I checked them, first thing, when I woke. All good. Probably a bit harder frozen than before, but they never even got actually close to feeling thawed. Worry. Those are a small fortune in foul. Still... all good.
Since waking, and while waking, yeah... got to be ^this old to say that... I did a bit more research regarding the i/o connections. I will check it, and the other connections, again. I need to ensure that the power cables are in solid states. Power being quarky is more than likely what will fry a machine. The wrong connection, not all the connections, a short. The wrong device connection could be a problem. But those are pretty difficult to get wrong. It's sort of like trying to use your foot to activate the turn signal. Still, some go that extra mile! Power, however... if it isn't even, and solidly attached, can smoke things. And it can look good and not be good. The again, too much pressure and you can snap boards, causing shorts and other problems. Unlike, say, sockets that are pressure sensitive, there are not rated, controlled, power connection tools. It takes experience, and that sort of experience can be very expensive.
Anyway. I did figure out what I needed. I will look over the connections. And I did look for, and find, sata III pci-e cards. They have them in the $30-$40 range, on up to dedicated raid boards at ten times that base range. I'll be sticking with the $40, though I hope to sift through the offerings to find something that has decent reviews and fewer reported problems. Many seem to have trouble being used for raid. But they would do just fine with the disc players, leaving the native board sata III for the two raid configs I want to arrange. Bleh... so much! Oh, and I will need another couple of sata cables, perhaps a few extensions as well. Baubles to be bought locally. So close, so very close.
If I check the connections, and feel satisfied, I may well end up attempting a post tonight, and working with the bios. Though I have everything needed for minor overclocking, I won't even consider that until I see that everything is running, and well, at basic settings, and for a while. A burn in, benchmarking, OS install, and a few other things first. In time, if all works, and after I have the system, software to hardware, all set up and arranged... and backed up twice over... then I might think about it. That is a while off. But a first stab at getting a solid post, and any troubleshooting, might happen yet tonight.
Later.
Wha?!?
.
.
Too "late". The mind is drifting.
I did get the front panel power set up. Correctly? I guess I will find out, before too long. Though I am leaning toward it being correct. Several forums seemed to indicate the same setup, and that made sense, potentially. I installed the video card and connected that to power... which is off of course, for now. Then I began tinkering with the 2.5" sled rigs, sata cords, and power cords. It wasn't as bad as I thought, assuming the connections are actually good. I have both sleds set up with two ssd's each. That is the main thing, other than the blu-ray, that was left before attempting a post. That way I can set up raid 10 on those, installing win 7 shortly thereafter. I don't know if 7 is as bad as some of the others, so that if I add those hybrids in raid 1, if I will have to reset 7 as if I bought a whole new computer? I should check on that. Oh, and I did get the cpu aftermarket fan cooler off and back on. It is MUCH easier to use a socket. It's still tricky, just not as tricky.
Thirty years ago, I would have pushed on through, taken my monitor in and hooked it up, then attempted to run the numbers. I am not that impertinent, impatient, or foolish. Of course, "that" is the key word. But no, not tonight. I will sleep on it. Then, when I wake, I will begin checking all of the power cords, all of the connections, finding things I am not sure about and researching those (or again, probably). They really did a horrible job of explaining the front panel i/o and led hookups, adding in something totally different without even explaining what it was or how to deal with it. The manual for both the motherboard and the case seem to be well out of date, and shamefully. The tech that is there is... two, maybe three, years old, at least. No excuse. Though I am beginning to suspect sales suck. These devices have been sitting on a shelf since they were made, only some were sold.
Yeah, something is really odd about the world economy. Everything that is moving is a fraud. Transferring goods from one place to another, without any sales taking place, to make it look like sales are happening... building cities no one is or probably will ever live in. How much tech even actually works? The newest mainstream chips I have seen from Intel look more like a green based step back. It's crazy out there. No one is willing to cross the line, call in debts, pull, push, or scrumming. Fascinating to watch. Terrifying to understand. Imagine watching lions and lambs all too afraid to run or chase, just looking around in a sort of shock or stupor. Do you have any idea what it would take to make that happen? Now... think about what it would take to make greedy men, warful nations, even terrorists, all reconsider what they are doing. Spooked.
Anyway. I won't be turning her over tonight. Maybe not even tomorrow night, depending on how well my research and certain goes. I want to have it pretty much nailed, at least in my mind, before I push the buttons. It is definitely about bedtime though. I actually expect there to be some problem. Major or minor... that's just how it goes. I have already hit some, though I seem to be figuring them out, so far, faster than they arise, mostly.
Good night.
.
Too "late". The mind is drifting.
I did get the front panel power set up. Correctly? I guess I will find out, before too long. Though I am leaning toward it being correct. Several forums seemed to indicate the same setup, and that made sense, potentially. I installed the video card and connected that to power... which is off of course, for now. Then I began tinkering with the 2.5" sled rigs, sata cords, and power cords. It wasn't as bad as I thought, assuming the connections are actually good. I have both sleds set up with two ssd's each. That is the main thing, other than the blu-ray, that was left before attempting a post. That way I can set up raid 10 on those, installing win 7 shortly thereafter. I don't know if 7 is as bad as some of the others, so that if I add those hybrids in raid 1, if I will have to reset 7 as if I bought a whole new computer? I should check on that. Oh, and I did get the cpu aftermarket fan cooler off and back on. It is MUCH easier to use a socket. It's still tricky, just not as tricky.
Thirty years ago, I would have pushed on through, taken my monitor in and hooked it up, then attempted to run the numbers. I am not that impertinent, impatient, or foolish. Of course, "that" is the key word. But no, not tonight. I will sleep on it. Then, when I wake, I will begin checking all of the power cords, all of the connections, finding things I am not sure about and researching those (or again, probably). They really did a horrible job of explaining the front panel i/o and led hookups, adding in something totally different without even explaining what it was or how to deal with it. The manual for both the motherboard and the case seem to be well out of date, and shamefully. The tech that is there is... two, maybe three, years old, at least. No excuse. Though I am beginning to suspect sales suck. These devices have been sitting on a shelf since they were made, only some were sold.
Yeah, something is really odd about the world economy. Everything that is moving is a fraud. Transferring goods from one place to another, without any sales taking place, to make it look like sales are happening... building cities no one is or probably will ever live in. How much tech even actually works? The newest mainstream chips I have seen from Intel look more like a green based step back. It's crazy out there. No one is willing to cross the line, call in debts, pull, push, or scrumming. Fascinating to watch. Terrifying to understand. Imagine watching lions and lambs all too afraid to run or chase, just looking around in a sort of shock or stupor. Do you have any idea what it would take to make that happen? Now... think about what it would take to make greedy men, warful nations, even terrorists, all reconsider what they are doing. Spooked.
Anyway. I won't be turning her over tonight. Maybe not even tomorrow night, depending on how well my research and certain goes. I want to have it pretty much nailed, at least in my mind, before I push the buttons. It is definitely about bedtime though. I actually expect there to be some problem. Major or minor... that's just how it goes. I have already hit some, though I seem to be figuring them out, so far, faster than they arise, mostly.
Good night.
One thing figured out.
.
.
Okay. It looks like the manual simply decided not to explain the difference between "FP PWR/SLP" and "PWR SWT". They both do the same thing, only use the light to indicate on/off or on/sleep (and maybe /off, too, somehow). It wasn't in the manual, it wasn't online, it wasn't in the fast connect. You were just supposed to know it. As to proper connections, in theory only the hard drive led is, from what I have read, vital to be in the correct polar setting. Settled, unless it isn't. A few more things to dig into. I might install the video card first though, and then sleep.
It isn't hard work. Between contorting to get into a position where I can work on some things to concentrating on figuring out what things mean, finding the information I need for certain, and applying all of that, though, can be a bit taxing. You can burn a grand or three in a heartbeat and have nothing to show for it. I'll take my time and play it as safe as possible. Still, at the end of the day, I will have to plug it all in, fire it up, and hope.
Oh, this will be done shortly. Remember, my hands are massive. Somewhere between an extra and a double extra large. I, thankfully, don't have sausage fingers. It is still a lot of landmass to mess with tiny details. I do really well with that given. To tell the truth? I've already done this. The problem? I... didn't take the sticker off the bottom. *shrugs* At least I know I could do it. Though I think I'll see about a socket with just a screwdriver drive for it. And maybe an extender. (start the vid at about 6:52 for how to install... before that is just... nerd stuff... going over what is in the box and all)
Well, back to work. Later.
.
Okay. It looks like the manual simply decided not to explain the difference between "FP PWR/SLP" and "PWR SWT". They both do the same thing, only use the light to indicate on/off or on/sleep (and maybe /off, too, somehow). It wasn't in the manual, it wasn't online, it wasn't in the fast connect. You were just supposed to know it. As to proper connections, in theory only the hard drive led is, from what I have read, vital to be in the correct polar setting. Settled, unless it isn't. A few more things to dig into. I might install the video card first though, and then sleep.
It isn't hard work. Between contorting to get into a position where I can work on some things to concentrating on figuring out what things mean, finding the information I need for certain, and applying all of that, though, can be a bit taxing. You can burn a grand or three in a heartbeat and have nothing to show for it. I'll take my time and play it as safe as possible. Still, at the end of the day, I will have to plug it all in, fire it up, and hope.
Oh, this will be done shortly. Remember, my hands are massive. Somewhere between an extra and a double extra large. I, thankfully, don't have sausage fingers. It is still a lot of landmass to mess with tiny details. I do really well with that given. To tell the truth? I've already done this. The problem? I... didn't take the sticker off the bottom. *shrugs* At least I know I could do it. Though I think I'll see about a socket with just a screwdriver drive for it. And maybe an extender. (start the vid at about 6:52 for how to install... before that is just... nerd stuff... going over what is in the box and all)
Well, back to work. Later.
Yeah. Not quite.
.
.
I did find information on the audio. What surprises me is that they have analog still, as an option. Perhaps non-gaming motherboards might still have very low level audio? Or is that the cpu? Or, possibly, both, with the weakest link being the deciding factor? I still can't find good information regarding the front panel i/o ports, leds, and such. Half of them I am sure about, the other half simply don't make sense. They are contrary to various sources, the manual only offers information that is explicit regarding two of the plugs (two of five) and those are contrary to how one of the others is shown in a diagram to be arranged. Huh? Yeah... Why so fussy? Some power arrangements can be backwards without a problem. Some can smoke a motherboard, and more. You can wipe a system with the wrong connections.
I keep looking. I might just give up on youtube and look for other sources, which might then, possible, have videos (from whatever source), and a more sure information set. Possibly even finding a forum that is still active. Oh, and I am finding some problems. I can't, easily, or even with the cables I currently have, connect all four ssd's. While they do fit on the bay sled, connecting power and sata cables as they are arranged... I suppose it should be possible. Or they wouldn't have designed sleds that could handle two drives, right? I suppose I could contort the power cords something fierce, but the sata cables... I am just not seeing it. I have looked on youtube for that as well. No real luck. I found someone who suggested that they were going to do it, or had done it, but didn't show how, or even show it after it was done. I, with this too, might look at sources other than youtube. Youtubes search engine seems shot. I might have to, sort of, give up on them.
Something I would suggest to youtube is... know thine enemy, and friend. And, yes, treat them differently. If someone brings you a ton of traffic, don't try to paywall them out of using you. Is it worth trying to scrape $10 out of someone's wallet when they bring you a ton of traffic? Seriously? Think about that. For the casual viewer, whatever. For free advertising that brings in many viewers? It's their call. It looks like they haven't plugged every hole, but they are getting close to it. If done, they will lose far more than they gain. I promise. I just can't pay for every service out there. Especially not the ones I keep in business through links. Choices. Consequences.
Anyway, on to a bit more work. Oh, I can probably do without the drives, of any sort, up front. I just need to check which i/o and led wires go where, toss on the video card, and see if I can get to the bios, update that, and see how it all shakes out. If that is good, I can begin arranging settings, then install the motherboard if that works. THEN get the rest of the system up and running. For the fiddly bits I will look around locally. I have enough power supply cords, it's the correct type and angle of sata cords that is the catch... and the nerve to twist-bang all of that to somehow fit.
Later.
.
I did find information on the audio. What surprises me is that they have analog still, as an option. Perhaps non-gaming motherboards might still have very low level audio? Or is that the cpu? Or, possibly, both, with the weakest link being the deciding factor? I still can't find good information regarding the front panel i/o ports, leds, and such. Half of them I am sure about, the other half simply don't make sense. They are contrary to various sources, the manual only offers information that is explicit regarding two of the plugs (two of five) and those are contrary to how one of the others is shown in a diagram to be arranged. Huh? Yeah... Why so fussy? Some power arrangements can be backwards without a problem. Some can smoke a motherboard, and more. You can wipe a system with the wrong connections.
I keep looking. I might just give up on youtube and look for other sources, which might then, possible, have videos (from whatever source), and a more sure information set. Possibly even finding a forum that is still active. Oh, and I am finding some problems. I can't, easily, or even with the cables I currently have, connect all four ssd's. While they do fit on the bay sled, connecting power and sata cables as they are arranged... I suppose it should be possible. Or they wouldn't have designed sleds that could handle two drives, right? I suppose I could contort the power cords something fierce, but the sata cables... I am just not seeing it. I have looked on youtube for that as well. No real luck. I found someone who suggested that they were going to do it, or had done it, but didn't show how, or even show it after it was done. I, with this too, might look at sources other than youtube. Youtubes search engine seems shot. I might have to, sort of, give up on them.
Something I would suggest to youtube is... know thine enemy, and friend. And, yes, treat them differently. If someone brings you a ton of traffic, don't try to paywall them out of using you. Is it worth trying to scrape $10 out of someone's wallet when they bring you a ton of traffic? Seriously? Think about that. For the casual viewer, whatever. For free advertising that brings in many viewers? It's their call. It looks like they haven't plugged every hole, but they are getting close to it. If done, they will lose far more than they gain. I promise. I just can't pay for every service out there. Especially not the ones I keep in business through links. Choices. Consequences.
Anyway, on to a bit more work. Oh, I can probably do without the drives, of any sort, up front. I just need to check which i/o and led wires go where, toss on the video card, and see if I can get to the bios, update that, and see how it all shakes out. If that is good, I can begin arranging settings, then install the motherboard if that works. THEN get the rest of the system up and running. For the fiddly bits I will look around locally. I have enough power supply cords, it's the correct type and angle of sata cords that is the catch... and the nerve to twist-bang all of that to somehow fit.
Later.
Build instructions are as clear as mud.
.
.
I have been working on the machine for a while. I was able to get what could be done without being grounded yesterday. Last night I snuck out for both a meal and a power bar. I wasn't sure I wanted to work on the machine today. It took a good long time to wake and become functional, longer than I thought. I finally became aware enough to begin tinkering.
Between what the various devices, including the case, provide, and the various manuals from the manufacturer... it is very difficult to make heads or tails of things. Beyond, it seems that each device might well be at a different tech level. For example, perhaps the case has wiring set for a certain sort of sound connection and the motherboard has a different connection. Neither manual, in this case, is telling me what to do. The board has a label by what seems to be the sound connection, but doesn't discuss that in the book. The case manual offers less. I remember this from the first time, but thought youtube would make this process easier. So far, not really. There are some areas youtube does have vids regarding, some it doesn't.
I am building the motherboard outside of the case first. I have the cpu and memory in, the larger duel fan cpu cooler in (youtube was great for that... that was a bear, but with advice from some guy I was able to do that in much shorter time, and much easier, that what he and most others would go through without advice). I have some of the connections for the front panel on, though between the instructions in the booklet and manual vs what they offer at youtube (which are contrary), I am not sure about those. I am not sure about the pci connection through the front panel either. That looks like it goes to a sata III, but... I haven't started tracking that down yet. I want to make sure I have the front panel right, then work on those odd extras. I may have to skip the sata to the front panel, at least for now. With four ssd's and two hybrids, I pretty much have used all of my native sata connections. I'll bet they make a small pci-e card with additional internal sata connections though?
Not bad, really. It does help to have a second machine to look things up. Well, and not have to worry about not being able to hop online, even just to blog out what I am doing. It can help to have folks know and prey. Well, and I pulled an update for the bios onto a thumb drive while I was at it. That may be the best way to get updates. This machine isn't for online. Though if I can figure out how to use linux, say, to get on and off, and install/update, I may use it from time to time. Just keep images, several layers of them, for the machine and be prepared to lose everything in order to get the machine functioning again. Even with safety arrangements, with a company as big and powerful as Microsoft trying to force us into software we don't want it will be difficult to keep them off my machine. Fry it all, if need be, and start over. As often as it takes.
Well, on to a bit more research. I am guessing some things should be pretty... standard, across brand and type of device. It's just a matter of finding the information. They really want you to buy whole systems, especially with MS and probably the government both trying to shove win 10 at us now. So they may be hiding this sort of information. I'll more. Yeah. I have already looked. But not quite as specifically so I might have just missed it. Later.
.
I have been working on the machine for a while. I was able to get what could be done without being grounded yesterday. Last night I snuck out for both a meal and a power bar. I wasn't sure I wanted to work on the machine today. It took a good long time to wake and become functional, longer than I thought. I finally became aware enough to begin tinkering.
Between what the various devices, including the case, provide, and the various manuals from the manufacturer... it is very difficult to make heads or tails of things. Beyond, it seems that each device might well be at a different tech level. For example, perhaps the case has wiring set for a certain sort of sound connection and the motherboard has a different connection. Neither manual, in this case, is telling me what to do. The board has a label by what seems to be the sound connection, but doesn't discuss that in the book. The case manual offers less. I remember this from the first time, but thought youtube would make this process easier. So far, not really. There are some areas youtube does have vids regarding, some it doesn't.
I am building the motherboard outside of the case first. I have the cpu and memory in, the larger duel fan cpu cooler in (youtube was great for that... that was a bear, but with advice from some guy I was able to do that in much shorter time, and much easier, that what he and most others would go through without advice). I have some of the connections for the front panel on, though between the instructions in the booklet and manual vs what they offer at youtube (which are contrary), I am not sure about those. I am not sure about the pci connection through the front panel either. That looks like it goes to a sata III, but... I haven't started tracking that down yet. I want to make sure I have the front panel right, then work on those odd extras. I may have to skip the sata to the front panel, at least for now. With four ssd's and two hybrids, I pretty much have used all of my native sata connections. I'll bet they make a small pci-e card with additional internal sata connections though?
Not bad, really. It does help to have a second machine to look things up. Well, and not have to worry about not being able to hop online, even just to blog out what I am doing. It can help to have folks know and prey. Well, and I pulled an update for the bios onto a thumb drive while I was at it. That may be the best way to get updates. This machine isn't for online. Though if I can figure out how to use linux, say, to get on and off, and install/update, I may use it from time to time. Just keep images, several layers of them, for the machine and be prepared to lose everything in order to get the machine functioning again. Even with safety arrangements, with a company as big and powerful as Microsoft trying to force us into software we don't want it will be difficult to keep them off my machine. Fry it all, if need be, and start over. As often as it takes.
Well, on to a bit more research. I am guessing some things should be pretty... standard, across brand and type of device. It's just a matter of finding the information. They really want you to buy whole systems, especially with MS and probably the government both trying to shove win 10 at us now. So they may be hiding this sort of information. I'll more. Yeah. I have already looked. But not quite as specifically so I might have just missed it. Later.
Monday, November 2, 2015
I've suggested.
.
.
There is great doubt even so. I probably shouldn't, as you, as usual, even if you choose to, and are capable to, understand you will miss the full picture. Oh well, I will go for it.
.
There is great doubt even so. I probably shouldn't, as you, as usual, even if you choose to, and are capable to, understand you will miss the full picture. Oh well, I will go for it.
Serusly?
.
.
Yeah, well, yeah. I didn't go to sleep until... right at 8:00... depending of whether the daylight savings has corrupted the official time yet or not. My computer says it has, but none of my other, supposedly, dls sensitive clocks or watches have reset. I'll... figure that out sooner or later. I would outlaw daylight savings and have the men and their families who invented that forced to live on a swing shift life schedule until they admit they were wrong. Well, and every bureaucrat and politician who helped along the way. Of course, that would just be the beginning. The politicians and bureaucrats who corrupted many things would be punished or exiled going back in history. The Kennedys would once again be Irish, but be living in North Korea, where their sort of politics is mandated. Things like that.
Anyway. I woke at 15:00, give or take, depending on if dls is in play or not, and all. I reset the dishes first thing. I want a shower, boys and girls. Didn't get one yesterday. Could have used it then, need it now. Then I realized the ssd's might be in, and they were. I was in my shortest of shorts. Still being only half awake, I looked at the package, for a bit, and whined. I couldn't go out, as things... stood. But I couldn't think what else to do. Finally, it hit me. Pj bottoms. Problem solved.
While the dishes were dealing with a fresh soak, and after dressing enough to reach the package, I brought them in and looked them over. Then I cracked open the case, brought the 2.5" sleds out, and began figuring out how to install. At first I thought the manufacturer of the case had made a mistake, suggesting the sleds would hold two ssd's. Then I flipped one of the ssd's over. Ah, holes not just on the side, but on the back. This I should have known. I have seen cases which have indentions specifically for ssd's on the motherboard panel, to be mounted through the panel, which means holes on the flat. Still, knowing and doing are two different things, especially the first time you functionally work with an item. You have to not only intellectually, but physically (sort of) learn. Odd how that is, at least for me. Sometimes it is natively intuitive, thankfully, just not this time. Then again, I had just awoken, so...
Yes, all rigged. All I really need to do is get a multioutlet with some spike shielding. I have a power cord if I need a little more distance from the plug. Then I can arrange the grounding then connect the motherboard, and set it all up outside of the case to make sure it all works, and posts. If that all works, then I can begin installation. Somethings can fail, and that be just fine. Some things have to work for the build to succeed. If even two of the ssd's work, I am good. Even if both of the hybrids fail, that is fine as they are just mass storage, not OS related. Memory has to work.
There is a lot you can't understand, directly, about these machines. You really have to do research. Thankfully there is youtube. That only helps to a degree. Ignore opinions, look for someone who has access to enough parts, software, and experience, to actually know what questions to ask, and how to answer those questions. For example, many people believe that quad sli (four video cards working together) will offer the best performance, or that an eight core system would be more powerful. Actually with the quad sli, that simply isn't true... as a general rule. Some games are arranged to use that, but even so the difference between the best and worst fps rates becomes an issue the more cards there are. It's only good for two cards, as a general rule. And that still isn't as good as a more powerful card. The reason I consider that is, for me, and my budget, the trade-off is acceptable, and two cards is the best of the worst. As for eight core? That is better but only at some things. For gaming you would absolutely have to overclock to make that pay (and, thankfully, that does overclock, for the intel chip anyway). But stock it isn't as good. Even overclocked, many games may not really make use of the extra cores, those being almost more of a drag than a boon. If you are into video editing? Yeah, there you go. But for gaming, no. The price to performance simply isn't there.
I have been chewing through as much information, cross checking that, figuring and learning. Things change, so what was true a couple years ago, or even last year, may not still hold. Though there are reasons to know more recent history. Realizing that there is a difference will lead to learning what has changed and why, perhaps. And that gives you a leg up on the next change. What it means, and why it was changed. It takes a great deal to be out ahead of the industry, from power supply to ram speed to pci-e slots. And you really won't ever be. No matter how true it seems on paper, it still has to be jacked in, sometimes made to run despite itself, then tested. Some things that should be butter from paper specs simply do not function in reality, or not well.
I may never be a pro. I simply like being aware enough to tinker, build my own, and such. It is my version of sports. Only, as a general rule, I don't have to worry about one of my "teams" throwing the game for individual fear or payoffs. I do have some worry about one of the teams getting lazy, or greedy, in other ways. But there are enough fans who will boo loudly enough that even my rheumy ears catch wind. Though, sometimes, fan boys will be fan boys, and perfection will be demanded that just can't really work. Well, and, sometimes, what is is.
After I get this going, my next move is to update, secure, add linux, and set up in other ways this (the one I am using right now) computer for a more secure online use. The gaming rig isn't for online. Anything I need, after initialization of some things, will be gotten through this machine, downloads, and a thumb drive. With a little care and tweaking, this ancient computer can last another four or five years. More if components last, if I may have to switch purely to linux if windows keeps up it's queer intolerance to the free-market and forces it's old OS's off the page, one way or another.
Oh... right... Dishes were finished, machine is as complete as possible without a trip to town. But a shower is needed. I just... need a bit of sit time to wake. What a rush, though, already. Too asleep to have realized how much I did end up rushing. Cool. Didn't wear me out, I'm just back to normal waking routines is all. A bit of time, a shower, a bit more time, then... who knows. Might get a decent part of the machine together tonight. I will be taking it slow though, and just doing a few very specific things at a time... say... cpu install, then sata III connections, then take a break. Then come back and connect the board to the power button and speakers so I have those controls. Just a bit at a time, so I really know what and were with a clear mind. Yeah, you can sort of do it all in a nebulous cloud... but that is better if you have a lot more, and more current, experience. For now I need to keep it simple, and have the instructions fresh.
Later.
.
Yeah, well, yeah. I didn't go to sleep until... right at 8:00... depending of whether the daylight savings has corrupted the official time yet or not. My computer says it has, but none of my other, supposedly, dls sensitive clocks or watches have reset. I'll... figure that out sooner or later. I would outlaw daylight savings and have the men and their families who invented that forced to live on a swing shift life schedule until they admit they were wrong. Well, and every bureaucrat and politician who helped along the way. Of course, that would just be the beginning. The politicians and bureaucrats who corrupted many things would be punished or exiled going back in history. The Kennedys would once again be Irish, but be living in North Korea, where their sort of politics is mandated. Things like that.
Anyway. I woke at 15:00, give or take, depending on if dls is in play or not, and all. I reset the dishes first thing. I want a shower, boys and girls. Didn't get one yesterday. Could have used it then, need it now. Then I realized the ssd's might be in, and they were. I was in my shortest of shorts. Still being only half awake, I looked at the package, for a bit, and whined. I couldn't go out, as things... stood. But I couldn't think what else to do. Finally, it hit me. Pj bottoms. Problem solved.
While the dishes were dealing with a fresh soak, and after dressing enough to reach the package, I brought them in and looked them over. Then I cracked open the case, brought the 2.5" sleds out, and began figuring out how to install. At first I thought the manufacturer of the case had made a mistake, suggesting the sleds would hold two ssd's. Then I flipped one of the ssd's over. Ah, holes not just on the side, but on the back. This I should have known. I have seen cases which have indentions specifically for ssd's on the motherboard panel, to be mounted through the panel, which means holes on the flat. Still, knowing and doing are two different things, especially the first time you functionally work with an item. You have to not only intellectually, but physically (sort of) learn. Odd how that is, at least for me. Sometimes it is natively intuitive, thankfully, just not this time. Then again, I had just awoken, so...
Yes, all rigged. All I really need to do is get a multioutlet with some spike shielding. I have a power cord if I need a little more distance from the plug. Then I can arrange the grounding then connect the motherboard, and set it all up outside of the case to make sure it all works, and posts. If that all works, then I can begin installation. Somethings can fail, and that be just fine. Some things have to work for the build to succeed. If even two of the ssd's work, I am good. Even if both of the hybrids fail, that is fine as they are just mass storage, not OS related. Memory has to work.
There is a lot you can't understand, directly, about these machines. You really have to do research. Thankfully there is youtube. That only helps to a degree. Ignore opinions, look for someone who has access to enough parts, software, and experience, to actually know what questions to ask, and how to answer those questions. For example, many people believe that quad sli (four video cards working together) will offer the best performance, or that an eight core system would be more powerful. Actually with the quad sli, that simply isn't true... as a general rule. Some games are arranged to use that, but even so the difference between the best and worst fps rates becomes an issue the more cards there are. It's only good for two cards, as a general rule. And that still isn't as good as a more powerful card. The reason I consider that is, for me, and my budget, the trade-off is acceptable, and two cards is the best of the worst. As for eight core? That is better but only at some things. For gaming you would absolutely have to overclock to make that pay (and, thankfully, that does overclock, for the intel chip anyway). But stock it isn't as good. Even overclocked, many games may not really make use of the extra cores, those being almost more of a drag than a boon. If you are into video editing? Yeah, there you go. But for gaming, no. The price to performance simply isn't there.
I have been chewing through as much information, cross checking that, figuring and learning. Things change, so what was true a couple years ago, or even last year, may not still hold. Though there are reasons to know more recent history. Realizing that there is a difference will lead to learning what has changed and why, perhaps. And that gives you a leg up on the next change. What it means, and why it was changed. It takes a great deal to be out ahead of the industry, from power supply to ram speed to pci-e slots. And you really won't ever be. No matter how true it seems on paper, it still has to be jacked in, sometimes made to run despite itself, then tested. Some things that should be butter from paper specs simply do not function in reality, or not well.
I may never be a pro. I simply like being aware enough to tinker, build my own, and such. It is my version of sports. Only, as a general rule, I don't have to worry about one of my "teams" throwing the game for individual fear or payoffs. I do have some worry about one of the teams getting lazy, or greedy, in other ways. But there are enough fans who will boo loudly enough that even my rheumy ears catch wind. Though, sometimes, fan boys will be fan boys, and perfection will be demanded that just can't really work. Well, and, sometimes, what is is.
After I get this going, my next move is to update, secure, add linux, and set up in other ways this (the one I am using right now) computer for a more secure online use. The gaming rig isn't for online. Anything I need, after initialization of some things, will be gotten through this machine, downloads, and a thumb drive. With a little care and tweaking, this ancient computer can last another four or five years. More if components last, if I may have to switch purely to linux if windows keeps up it's queer intolerance to the free-market and forces it's old OS's off the page, one way or another.
Oh... right... Dishes were finished, machine is as complete as possible without a trip to town. But a shower is needed. I just... need a bit of sit time to wake. What a rush, though, already. Too asleep to have realized how much I did end up rushing. Cool. Didn't wear me out, I'm just back to normal waking routines is all. A bit of time, a shower, a bit more time, then... who knows. Might get a decent part of the machine together tonight. I will be taking it slow though, and just doing a few very specific things at a time... say... cpu install, then sata III connections, then take a break. Then come back and connect the board to the power button and speakers so I have those controls. Just a bit at a time, so I really know what and were with a clear mind. Yeah, you can sort of do it all in a nebulous cloud... but that is better if you have a lot more, and more current, experience. For now I need to keep it simple, and have the instructions fresh.
Later.
Sunday, November 1, 2015
Yeah, well...
.
.
I didn't get back to the dishes, so no shower yet. I did open up the space for tinkering with the computer. I laid out the anti-static mat, hooked up the various connections for the various bands and other grounds, if they aren't yet hooked up to the power supply, nor is that plugged in. I then set up the components and case for easy access.
While I was at it, I decided to do some of the minor things which do not require me being grounded. I changed out two of the 230 mm fans. Actually I changed them all out. I had hoped to put a blue one on the front panel and side panel. Nope. The front panel simply didn't have mounting holes that worked with the new fan. I must have spent an hour trying various alignments, comparing it to the fan I removed, and just... working everything I could imagine. It simply would not fit. I didn't give up so much as realize that without some dubious physical modding, it just would not fit. And the modding? I could always use small bungee cord or the material and a little imagination. It would always be a bit doubtful. I'd have to use the small gauge bungee cords that look like parachute cord. Some come with balls, with which to wrap and tighten. Hmm. I may have some of those somewhere. I might just try it. The trick is to get it tight enough that there is no rattling! That is unnerving.
I also put in the two blu-ray drives. Yes, writers. They (manufacturers and makers, big and small) are pushing people away from discs. They want us to download everything. Some of it is to be green (a fiction) or to push downloading software (supposed to secure patents, copyrights, and such, but just as often a way to break into your computer for any number of reasons, and not in your favor in any way save lazy convenience). Don't do it, boy! Force them to offer cd/dvd/blu-ray discs. If you don't own a copy, do you even honestly own the software? No. You are renting, and that rent is subject to their changing the rules at any time, potentially requires being online to even use "their" software, and their stuff might remove software you have put on it if it thinks you shouldn't have it... software unrelated to it. Yeah, I'll keep those drives. And I might begin learning to crack. If they want war, they'll get it.
I also added the hybrid drives. I did a few other odds and ends as well. Installing the 120 mm fan for video card cooling shield (not vital now, but I'll be doing sli/xfire when my card's price drops $100, then it will be needed), then reinstalled the shield, installed the power supply, and just gave the case and some of the other components a once over, as I think about how to keep the installation clean. Hiding wires can be easy or not. Sometimes, no matter what, something just doesn't, and can't be made to, look just right.
Yes, I really enjoy this sort of thing. It is risky, which is something I do enjoy. It is technical, if in a more minor way. I would say there is more tech in figuring out what runs best with what, aiming and tweaking the building, listening to pro's but not just following like a complete tool, and such. Putting it together is minor work. The real work is using the mind to begin with, and learning what these things actually mean. Some suggest that you aren't really tech unless you know how these things work. The problem, and argument, I have with that notion is... I don't think even the manufacturers honestly know how these things work. They know, sort of, mostly, that they can get certain functions from the electronic components (most of the time). But just as often, that is merely a buildup of engineering that has worked more than theory that has been brought to practical applications. Much like rocket science. Even now, neither are truly science, merely engineering stacked to a point where, when someone goes into those fields with practical application, they just use those stacks of data, then trial and error, until... *poof* it... sort of, mostly, usually, or sometimes works... depending on how well they did their trial and error and engineering studies. Bleh.
If the ssd's arrive tomorrow... I just am not sure. Depends on when they arrive and when I wake. I might be able to get some things going tomorrow, though I won't swear to it. One thing I forgot is that I need a grounded shielded multi-outlet kit, and probably a grounded extension cord, so I can get the grounding I need before working on the hard drive and motherboard. I will be putting that together outside, making sure it will post and the components work, before putting that all in the case. It just works better that way. If I can, I might get out tonight and get that. I'd have to do dishes first, and get a shower in. Being done with the new computer, having done as much as is possible without the rest of the required grounding equipment, I just might get to those dishes, and a shower. Walmart is good enough for this sort of thing, and is 24/7 minus Christmas? Yeah, I think that is it minus floods and other natural disasters.
Well, later.
.
I didn't get back to the dishes, so no shower yet. I did open up the space for tinkering with the computer. I laid out the anti-static mat, hooked up the various connections for the various bands and other grounds, if they aren't yet hooked up to the power supply, nor is that plugged in. I then set up the components and case for easy access.
While I was at it, I decided to do some of the minor things which do not require me being grounded. I changed out two of the 230 mm fans. Actually I changed them all out. I had hoped to put a blue one on the front panel and side panel. Nope. The front panel simply didn't have mounting holes that worked with the new fan. I must have spent an hour trying various alignments, comparing it to the fan I removed, and just... working everything I could imagine. It simply would not fit. I didn't give up so much as realize that without some dubious physical modding, it just would not fit. And the modding? I could always use small bungee cord or the material and a little imagination. It would always be a bit doubtful. I'd have to use the small gauge bungee cords that look like parachute cord. Some come with balls, with which to wrap and tighten. Hmm. I may have some of those somewhere. I might just try it. The trick is to get it tight enough that there is no rattling! That is unnerving.
I also put in the two blu-ray drives. Yes, writers. They (manufacturers and makers, big and small) are pushing people away from discs. They want us to download everything. Some of it is to be green (a fiction) or to push downloading software (supposed to secure patents, copyrights, and such, but just as often a way to break into your computer for any number of reasons, and not in your favor in any way save lazy convenience). Don't do it, boy! Force them to offer cd/dvd/blu-ray discs. If you don't own a copy, do you even honestly own the software? No. You are renting, and that rent is subject to their changing the rules at any time, potentially requires being online to even use "their" software, and their stuff might remove software you have put on it if it thinks you shouldn't have it... software unrelated to it. Yeah, I'll keep those drives. And I might begin learning to crack. If they want war, they'll get it.
I also added the hybrid drives. I did a few other odds and ends as well. Installing the 120 mm fan for video card cooling shield (not vital now, but I'll be doing sli/xfire when my card's price drops $100, then it will be needed), then reinstalled the shield, installed the power supply, and just gave the case and some of the other components a once over, as I think about how to keep the installation clean. Hiding wires can be easy or not. Sometimes, no matter what, something just doesn't, and can't be made to, look just right.
Yes, I really enjoy this sort of thing. It is risky, which is something I do enjoy. It is technical, if in a more minor way. I would say there is more tech in figuring out what runs best with what, aiming and tweaking the building, listening to pro's but not just following like a complete tool, and such. Putting it together is minor work. The real work is using the mind to begin with, and learning what these things actually mean. Some suggest that you aren't really tech unless you know how these things work. The problem, and argument, I have with that notion is... I don't think even the manufacturers honestly know how these things work. They know, sort of, mostly, that they can get certain functions from the electronic components (most of the time). But just as often, that is merely a buildup of engineering that has worked more than theory that has been brought to practical applications. Much like rocket science. Even now, neither are truly science, merely engineering stacked to a point where, when someone goes into those fields with practical application, they just use those stacks of data, then trial and error, until... *poof* it... sort of, mostly, usually, or sometimes works... depending on how well they did their trial and error and engineering studies. Bleh.
If the ssd's arrive tomorrow... I just am not sure. Depends on when they arrive and when I wake. I might be able to get some things going tomorrow, though I won't swear to it. One thing I forgot is that I need a grounded shielded multi-outlet kit, and probably a grounded extension cord, so I can get the grounding I need before working on the hard drive and motherboard. I will be putting that together outside, making sure it will post and the components work, before putting that all in the case. It just works better that way. If I can, I might get out tonight and get that. I'd have to do dishes first, and get a shower in. Being done with the new computer, having done as much as is possible without the rest of the required grounding equipment, I just might get to those dishes, and a shower. Walmart is good enough for this sort of thing, and is 24/7 minus Christmas? Yeah, I think that is it minus floods and other natural disasters.
Well, later.
Yes, no, maybe?
.
.
Do I look like a woman, or like I'm awake? Default is no until further processes are functioning. Wait, that is rather feminine. But they learned it from us! Stole pants too, but they can look good in them. *grins* Don't hate me, blame it on my bootup routines, well, and the truth!
I slept well. I'm not waking until 17:00 though. Having to use an alarm at that. Which... isn't the best. I think I went down at... actually I am not sure. I know, for waking, day over day, I lost two hours, waking around 15:00 yesterday. I think. It's the growing darkness and added cool. The latter... actually both... suit me fine. Most of the rest of you simply have to push on through, and be grumpy. *smile* We really do live in a day and time that is unnatural. While working from morning to early evening is a rather European thing, which was unnatural as well, America has taken that and doubled down into serious expectations of effort. While that is totally collapsing with this generation, employers aren't capitulating just yet. Going foreign in a last-ditch attempt. Though doing that even more than necessary to cut costs. While not realizing, one way or another, they are also cutting their bottom line. Pay your employees less, as an across the board thing nationwide in all industries and? And people have less to spend.
Americans are the major buyers of anything new, innovative, odd, one off, or cutting edge especially. Not every American in every area. From hot-rod kits to screaming computing machines for home to fancy housing items. Chinese can't afford what our working poor can buy. Russians are rich in comparison but also can't afford toasters! Europeans are, on average, our upper class working poor. There isn't another consumer base like America. And our leaders have decided to end our prosperity. Every policy out of the government for the last nearly eight, but honestly more like 24 years, has been directly and intentionally or not aimed at destroying that middle class. And it has succeeded. But there is a price. The wealthy buy fancy, but they don't buy much. A hundred million dollar yacht doesn't make up for thirty million $10-$30 k sport/speed/fishing boats (and all that goes with them, such as trailers). The volume isn't there. And the wealth taken for the creation isn't spread around either. Still, Americans were too busy believing politicians to see what they were doing. It wasn't until Bush the Younger's second dance with disaster that I realized the gig was up, myself.
Yes, companies have slit their own throats. Currently just trying to stay afloat, but by supporting an academia that more and more spent huge amounts per child and have children that only feel good about themselves but often can't negotiate making change or reading and following simple instructions. It must be daunting doing interviews. A college degree provides little better, and more adds an insulting attitude of deserving a job and a social say through it. I guess this is how civilization will grind to a halt. It takes competent workers, a reasonably indifferent and uninvolved government (so it doesn't interfere), a viable ability to easily generate an income, family, and faith. Which of those areas even exist at this point. It was never perfect, but those things did exist. Now?
Anyway... I meant to take a shower, but without thinking, I reset the dishes to soak. No real problem. I have been showering every or every other day for a while now. And this will get me focused on doing those last dishes, I really want another shower today. Love those when I am feeling up to it, or more, simply able. I have really been thinking of, somehow, getting one of those walk-in baths. It wouldn't be something I'd buy tomorrow. And they are exceedingly expensive. Further, they might actually be too small for me. The idea of them leaking is terrifying. But the prospect of a bath two to three times a week, plus showers, is wonderful. Much easier to clean than a standard tub, too.
Well, I best get to something then. With the shower out while the dish rinse water cools, perhaps I can finish at least the area for the computer while I wait. Later.
.
Do I look like a woman, or like I'm awake? Default is no until further processes are functioning. Wait, that is rather feminine. But they learned it from us! Stole pants too, but they can look good in them. *grins* Don't hate me, blame it on my bootup routines, well, and the truth!
I slept well. I'm not waking until 17:00 though. Having to use an alarm at that. Which... isn't the best. I think I went down at... actually I am not sure. I know, for waking, day over day, I lost two hours, waking around 15:00 yesterday. I think. It's the growing darkness and added cool. The latter... actually both... suit me fine. Most of the rest of you simply have to push on through, and be grumpy. *smile* We really do live in a day and time that is unnatural. While working from morning to early evening is a rather European thing, which was unnatural as well, America has taken that and doubled down into serious expectations of effort. While that is totally collapsing with this generation, employers aren't capitulating just yet. Going foreign in a last-ditch attempt. Though doing that even more than necessary to cut costs. While not realizing, one way or another, they are also cutting their bottom line. Pay your employees less, as an across the board thing nationwide in all industries and? And people have less to spend.
Americans are the major buyers of anything new, innovative, odd, one off, or cutting edge especially. Not every American in every area. From hot-rod kits to screaming computing machines for home to fancy housing items. Chinese can't afford what our working poor can buy. Russians are rich in comparison but also can't afford toasters! Europeans are, on average, our upper class working poor. There isn't another consumer base like America. And our leaders have decided to end our prosperity. Every policy out of the government for the last nearly eight, but honestly more like 24 years, has been directly and intentionally or not aimed at destroying that middle class. And it has succeeded. But there is a price. The wealthy buy fancy, but they don't buy much. A hundred million dollar yacht doesn't make up for thirty million $10-$30 k sport/speed/fishing boats (and all that goes with them, such as trailers). The volume isn't there. And the wealth taken for the creation isn't spread around either. Still, Americans were too busy believing politicians to see what they were doing. It wasn't until Bush the Younger's second dance with disaster that I realized the gig was up, myself.
Yes, companies have slit their own throats. Currently just trying to stay afloat, but by supporting an academia that more and more spent huge amounts per child and have children that only feel good about themselves but often can't negotiate making change or reading and following simple instructions. It must be daunting doing interviews. A college degree provides little better, and more adds an insulting attitude of deserving a job and a social say through it. I guess this is how civilization will grind to a halt. It takes competent workers, a reasonably indifferent and uninvolved government (so it doesn't interfere), a viable ability to easily generate an income, family, and faith. Which of those areas even exist at this point. It was never perfect, but those things did exist. Now?
Anyway... I meant to take a shower, but without thinking, I reset the dishes to soak. No real problem. I have been showering every or every other day for a while now. And this will get me focused on doing those last dishes, I really want another shower today. Love those when I am feeling up to it, or more, simply able. I have really been thinking of, somehow, getting one of those walk-in baths. It wouldn't be something I'd buy tomorrow. And they are exceedingly expensive. Further, they might actually be too small for me. The idea of them leaking is terrifying. But the prospect of a bath two to three times a week, plus showers, is wonderful. Much easier to clean than a standard tub, too.
Well, I best get to something then. With the shower out while the dish rinse water cools, perhaps I can finish at least the area for the computer while I wait. Later.
Saturday, October 31, 2015
Oh, right, happy Halloween.
.
.
I had, and had not, forgotten. Sometimes Halloween is operated on the 31st, sometimes another night. I had forgotten to ask. Tonight is the night. Three groups of candy bandits have been by already. I don't have much candy, and not the best kinds. However, I do have a backup plan. I simply got involved with the machine and a few other projects and lost track. I could have bought candy yesterday, when I stole in to town late. I just wasn't up to shopping, so... No worries, I do have a solid backup plan. And the candy that is there works too, for a while.
However, until the goblins, witches, soldiers, jailbreakers, and such stop arriving, work is off the schedule. Yeah, hurts my feelings, too. *grins*
It sort of stinks that I will have to soak the dishes in hot water again. But so what. I can reset them as I head to town for dinner when the monster parade is over. They should be just about ready after I go, eat, return, and let the food digest for long enough to get back to work. Good kids here in town. Lots of eyes, and eyes that know and prattle if need be, helps. You can see it in some of their eyes, the devil that used to live in the child we were. What gets me is how small children have become! If you haven't seen them in a while it simply comes as a bit of a shock. Oh, I see some younglings. But I get so used to them that I forget some things. They become known, so go unmeasured... sort of. One of them didn't go up to my knee! Cut as a bug, and then some though. I do enjoy Halloween. Just wish I was better prepared.
Ah, and I ordered geese. The sizes are okay, but... not what I had hoped. The bigger ones were gone. I may pull a trick out of my hat though, to top it. We will see. But, for now, something something is cooking, or potentially. Wasn't it the Scrooge who offered the Christmas goose? I'm not that good, but I can be that bad? Nah, I don't think so. Not on the topic of Christmas anyway.
Later.
.
I had, and had not, forgotten. Sometimes Halloween is operated on the 31st, sometimes another night. I had forgotten to ask. Tonight is the night. Three groups of candy bandits have been by already. I don't have much candy, and not the best kinds. However, I do have a backup plan. I simply got involved with the machine and a few other projects and lost track. I could have bought candy yesterday, when I stole in to town late. I just wasn't up to shopping, so... No worries, I do have a solid backup plan. And the candy that is there works too, for a while.
However, until the goblins, witches, soldiers, jailbreakers, and such stop arriving, work is off the schedule. Yeah, hurts my feelings, too. *grins*
It sort of stinks that I will have to soak the dishes in hot water again. But so what. I can reset them as I head to town for dinner when the monster parade is over. They should be just about ready after I go, eat, return, and let the food digest for long enough to get back to work. Good kids here in town. Lots of eyes, and eyes that know and prattle if need be, helps. You can see it in some of their eyes, the devil that used to live in the child we were. What gets me is how small children have become! If you haven't seen them in a while it simply comes as a bit of a shock. Oh, I see some younglings. But I get so used to them that I forget some things. They become known, so go unmeasured... sort of. One of them didn't go up to my knee! Cut as a bug, and then some though. I do enjoy Halloween. Just wish I was better prepared.
Ah, and I ordered geese. The sizes are okay, but... not what I had hoped. The bigger ones were gone. I may pull a trick out of my hat though, to top it. We will see. But, for now, something something is cooking, or potentially. Wasn't it the Scrooge who offered the Christmas goose? I'm not that good, but I can be that bad? Nah, I don't think so. Not on the topic of Christmas anyway.
Later.
Ugh, sleep is nuts.
.
.
I'm on a permanent shift change, for now. Probably until everything sorts itself out. All good though, really. Health is better, sleep is just tumbling. It's enjoyable on the one hand, a bit disorienting on the other. Even so, I have been able to do bits and pieces of this and that. I did set the dishes to a soak after a shower last night, then reset them a few hours ago when I woke. And, yes, I made it to town for a meal.
They put cheese and pickles on the burger which itself was the oldest burger I have gotten from McDonalds in a long time, the fries tasted like fish and I only got a medium order instead of the large (which turns out to be a blessing as they were nearly inedible), and the Mcnuggets... I couldn't tell if those were fish or chicken. Still, the Mcnuggets saved the meal, for the most part. Mild enough, whatever they were, that it worked. That McDonalds (the only joint open that late at night, so not a choice mind you) started offering breakfast all hours. I think that means they are running out of regular food quickly (why I didn't get the burger I ordered, couldn't afford the stock to make it fresh, or the fries as they run out), and are using the fryer for too many things. I suppose, if that is where their market is, then that is the way it goes. I'll just not be eating there at night anymore. It's a free market, or at least for now. But free means I don't have to buy.
I've got the timer set for two hours, at least I set it at that when I reset the dishes. I'll check them then. I did dry and put up a few things right after wetting them, other things I wanted to soak, and will double check as I dry them. It's just how I prefer to do dishes. I may put a small load of laundry in. Pj's, warm robe, and such, are becoming less a luxury or occasional item as fall flirts with winter in the lead up to the changing of that guard. I like winter, and yet I am learning to negotiate with it more on my terms. All good. But robes and fleece pj's are required and I don't have many of those. And my lip has a hole in it, sometimes. No milk mustache, though sometimes a white goatee. :p Dang kids.
I might get in to the living room before too awful long, and get more done there. It's closer. Much closer. Though I am not as far along into the rest of the room as I thought I might be by now. Tumbling sleep throws things a bit off. While I have been doing more work, it isn't as focused on what I wanted, and ends up being just here, there, hit, and miss. Oh well. Hmm... If I am a good boy, I may go out later for a treat. This time, though, I may go into the restaurant, since they are actually open, and make sure they get it right. I think, on a Friday late night, they think they are cooking for drunks, on top of it. Something seemed off in there, too. Not sure what the problem was.
Later.
.
I'm on a permanent shift change, for now. Probably until everything sorts itself out. All good though, really. Health is better, sleep is just tumbling. It's enjoyable on the one hand, a bit disorienting on the other. Even so, I have been able to do bits and pieces of this and that. I did set the dishes to a soak after a shower last night, then reset them a few hours ago when I woke. And, yes, I made it to town for a meal.
They put cheese and pickles on the burger which itself was the oldest burger I have gotten from McDonalds in a long time, the fries tasted like fish and I only got a medium order instead of the large (which turns out to be a blessing as they were nearly inedible), and the Mcnuggets... I couldn't tell if those were fish or chicken. Still, the Mcnuggets saved the meal, for the most part. Mild enough, whatever they were, that it worked. That McDonalds (the only joint open that late at night, so not a choice mind you) started offering breakfast all hours. I think that means they are running out of regular food quickly (why I didn't get the burger I ordered, couldn't afford the stock to make it fresh, or the fries as they run out), and are using the fryer for too many things. I suppose, if that is where their market is, then that is the way it goes. I'll just not be eating there at night anymore. It's a free market, or at least for now. But free means I don't have to buy.
I've got the timer set for two hours, at least I set it at that when I reset the dishes. I'll check them then. I did dry and put up a few things right after wetting them, other things I wanted to soak, and will double check as I dry them. It's just how I prefer to do dishes. I may put a small load of laundry in. Pj's, warm robe, and such, are becoming less a luxury or occasional item as fall flirts with winter in the lead up to the changing of that guard. I like winter, and yet I am learning to negotiate with it more on my terms. All good. But robes and fleece pj's are required and I don't have many of those. And my lip has a hole in it, sometimes. No milk mustache, though sometimes a white goatee. :p Dang kids.
I might get in to the living room before too awful long, and get more done there. It's closer. Much closer. Though I am not as far along into the rest of the room as I thought I might be by now. Tumbling sleep throws things a bit off. While I have been doing more work, it isn't as focused on what I wanted, and ends up being just here, there, hit, and miss. Oh well. Hmm... If I am a good boy, I may go out later for a treat. This time, though, I may go into the restaurant, since they are actually open, and make sure they get it right. I think, on a Friday late night, they think they are cooking for drunks, on top of it. Something seemed off in there, too. Not sure what the problem was.
Later.
Chuckling, grumbling, and getting on with it.
.
.
I finished the rest of the dishes. Now to get a shower and to town. I am really low on gas, so may have to buy that first thing, before eating. The idea is just to get a bite to eat. Something I don't have to cook, clean up after mostly, or do any dishes. I need to push though, I prefer lunch/dinner over breakfast for fast food. I will put the dishes in to soak after I take a shower.
One of the things I purchased, along with components, was a blower, to keep the computers clean. I keep running out of canned air. Which isn't exactly cheap. I don't care about the notion of one being greener than the other. Truth told, I don't think anyone had done enough thinking, and it might not be possible since we don't understand things well enough, to know if one sort of thing is better or not. The idea, however, is to have a device that always has air, as long as it runs. And it isn't just for computers. I'm not sure how strong it really is, even after trying it. I ought to find a dusty area in some corner and find out.
Still a bit hollow feeling. Getting better. Trying to prep for the final components and build. And getting in a couple of rebates, if I can do that on time. One has to be out by the 6th, the other has to be out within a month of purchase. Both are definitely going to be used, so I don't have to worry about getting stuck through the rebate. Not that I am at all sure I will see those rebates anytime soon, perhaps ever. Those, at one time anyway, were all talk, no show. Worth a shot for a couple of stamps, I suppose. Technically not a gamble.
Alright, I best hurry. Later.
.
I finished the rest of the dishes. Now to get a shower and to town. I am really low on gas, so may have to buy that first thing, before eating. The idea is just to get a bite to eat. Something I don't have to cook, clean up after mostly, or do any dishes. I need to push though, I prefer lunch/dinner over breakfast for fast food. I will put the dishes in to soak after I take a shower.
One of the things I purchased, along with components, was a blower, to keep the computers clean. I keep running out of canned air. Which isn't exactly cheap. I don't care about the notion of one being greener than the other. Truth told, I don't think anyone had done enough thinking, and it might not be possible since we don't understand things well enough, to know if one sort of thing is better or not. The idea, however, is to have a device that always has air, as long as it runs. And it isn't just for computers. I'm not sure how strong it really is, even after trying it. I ought to find a dusty area in some corner and find out.
Still a bit hollow feeling. Getting better. Trying to prep for the final components and build. And getting in a couple of rebates, if I can do that on time. One has to be out by the 6th, the other has to be out within a month of purchase. Both are definitely going to be used, so I don't have to worry about getting stuck through the rebate. Not that I am at all sure I will see those rebates anytime soon, perhaps ever. Those, at one time anyway, were all talk, no show. Worth a shot for a couple of stamps, I suppose. Technically not a gamble.
Alright, I best hurry. Later.
Friday, October 30, 2015
Sleep is all over the place.
.
.
No worries. If I need sleep, anymore, I sleep. I can keep up on things much easier if rested. If I need to do my work at night, all good. If the next time I work is a shift and an half out of sync, cool. I am... nearing the ability to hit it. The only way I will reach that is to ignore my schedule and take work when it is possible. I reset the dishes shortly after waking then waking up. I have the stove alarm set to go off in two hours. I will test the water then. I run pure hot, 155F water, on the dishes. While I can wash right in that temp I prefer not to do so. Some days it cools quicker, sometimes slower. Two hours is the minimum soak time. I didn't do a rough wash, though most of it has already been hit once. Some days, cold slimy water is just too much to take. I hope to wash, then shower, put them in for a rinse, then maybe head to town for a cheap and easy. Meal! Meal! Watch that mind gutter ball! Hush.
The case fans arrived. I checked them and they will work. There were doubts, from (bad) comments, that the 230 weren't full size. Why people write false comments? Yeah, there is the "competition", and there are the SJW's, though I think in this case, the dolt probably did order the wrong size and then blamed everybody else. There are some dirt-stupid people out there. I also ordered the ssd's. I actually did that last night, after midnight. My "check" usually arrives right after midnight on the 1st or the Friday (or earlier day for long holidays) before the weekend or holiday. So that I am not locked out of my income. It... isn't quite working at midnight, like it used to. It probably does save the government a few bucks (when added all together) (if they are doing it wisely, though I won't hold my breath, but they should be doing that correctly and easily, if it is just as likely enriching some crony "friend"). Gah! Now, I don't mind it not showing up until bank hours, I just had to refile the order, and before noon if I wanted an extra-expedited delivery, which I did. Hopefully Monday. However, with my sleep being weird, and somewhat demanding, it was tricky... had to refile the order before noon. Woke and saw the problem at 10:00, but couldn't stay awake, and wasn't aware enough, to realize all the issues. As I slept, until about 11:00, the notions percolated until I was able to rise to the surface of consciousness at about 11:00 and get the order redone (thankfully a Cali company, so I actually had two hours of leeway). After that, though, I crashed again for... a while. A long while.
I am rather close to having the living room arranged, sort of. If I do, there are some minor things I can set up. Adding the extra fans, changing out a fan, perhaps installing the power supply, and arranging parts. I have been studying the motherboard, video board, bios, and among other things. Truth is, until I get in there, it's... not going to all make really good sense. And the information available is rather limited. With as many software and hardware options, know what to do, use, or turn off, in order to optimize, is... probably beyond a first time (at least first in a long time) builder. Funny, though, how much really hasn't changed.
Never mind. I am in some kind of odd sleeping mess with the dark and cool and medicines and stress and... Meh. I have definitely had worse. I even know what day it is, sort out time, am keeping track of some notions, if I am falling a bit behind in action, including making an appointment and ordering geese. I do stumble. But... it doesn't completely slide. Oh, right, but I need to call some folk and figure some things out. A call tonight, and I might be able to place an order for two of the geese tonight. Or all four. Gah! Depends, for the psychically incontinent? Hmm... Oh, right, COFFEE! Yeah, a drought of that ought to do. Later.
.
No worries. If I need sleep, anymore, I sleep. I can keep up on things much easier if rested. If I need to do my work at night, all good. If the next time I work is a shift and an half out of sync, cool. I am... nearing the ability to hit it. The only way I will reach that is to ignore my schedule and take work when it is possible. I reset the dishes shortly after waking then waking up. I have the stove alarm set to go off in two hours. I will test the water then. I run pure hot, 155F water, on the dishes. While I can wash right in that temp I prefer not to do so. Some days it cools quicker, sometimes slower. Two hours is the minimum soak time. I didn't do a rough wash, though most of it has already been hit once. Some days, cold slimy water is just too much to take. I hope to wash, then shower, put them in for a rinse, then maybe head to town for a cheap and easy. Meal! Meal! Watch that mind gutter ball! Hush.
The case fans arrived. I checked them and they will work. There were doubts, from (bad) comments, that the 230 weren't full size. Why people write false comments? Yeah, there is the "competition", and there are the SJW's, though I think in this case, the dolt probably did order the wrong size and then blamed everybody else. There are some dirt-stupid people out there. I also ordered the ssd's. I actually did that last night, after midnight. My "check" usually arrives right after midnight on the 1st or the Friday (or earlier day for long holidays) before the weekend or holiday. So that I am not locked out of my income. It... isn't quite working at midnight, like it used to. It probably does save the government a few bucks (when added all together) (if they are doing it wisely, though I won't hold my breath, but they should be doing that correctly and easily, if it is just as likely enriching some crony "friend"). Gah! Now, I don't mind it not showing up until bank hours, I just had to refile the order, and before noon if I wanted an extra-expedited delivery, which I did. Hopefully Monday. However, with my sleep being weird, and somewhat demanding, it was tricky... had to refile the order before noon. Woke and saw the problem at 10:00, but couldn't stay awake, and wasn't aware enough, to realize all the issues. As I slept, until about 11:00, the notions percolated until I was able to rise to the surface of consciousness at about 11:00 and get the order redone (thankfully a Cali company, so I actually had two hours of leeway). After that, though, I crashed again for... a while. A long while.
I am rather close to having the living room arranged, sort of. If I do, there are some minor things I can set up. Adding the extra fans, changing out a fan, perhaps installing the power supply, and arranging parts. I have been studying the motherboard, video board, bios, and among other things. Truth is, until I get in there, it's... not going to all make really good sense. And the information available is rather limited. With as many software and hardware options, know what to do, use, or turn off, in order to optimize, is... probably beyond a first time (at least first in a long time) builder. Funny, though, how much really hasn't changed.
Never mind. I am in some kind of odd sleeping mess with the dark and cool and medicines and stress and... Meh. I have definitely had worse. I even know what day it is, sort out time, am keeping track of some notions, if I am falling a bit behind in action, including making an appointment and ordering geese. I do stumble. But... it doesn't completely slide. Oh, right, but I need to call some folk and figure some things out. A call tonight, and I might be able to place an order for two of the geese tonight. Or all four. Gah! Depends, for the psychically incontinent? Hmm... Oh, right, COFFEE! Yeah, a drought of that ought to do. Later.
More study, less work.
.
.
I did do a minor portion of the dishes. I may do more. Running slow as my body sorts medicines out. I did read the manuals that came with the motherboard and video card. Wow, that was a lot of nothing. The motherboard offered some information, but raised far more questions than not. Especially regarding configuring the bios.
It would suggest things you could turn on or off but give no reason for doing either. '"In the next step, set Auto-deconformation to 0, 1, or 3. If, while booting, the computer screams at you in French, you will know this is the problem. Go ahead and power the system back down, unplug the power source, then use the jumpers to delete the memory. Then, while the system is still powered down, reset the switch to one of the two remaining choices. Repeat until the system stops screaming at you in French."' Yeah, only, actually, they give you no idea if you will know if you did it wrong or not. The thing is, some of these might be key to fully utilizing some of your system. And there is no guarantee that default will work.
Oh, no worries. I'll figure it out. I figure I will do just fine. It will be a step by step walk through having everything up and running, using testing software to square off the areas too rounded, or round off those parts that are too square. Oh, about the raid 10... I will be using four inexpensive 120 gb ssds. They aren't the absolute blazing fastest, but are good enough, as is. With a raid 10, I will end up with 240gb at double their rate, which will make them safer, faster, and sum total no more expensive (and probably cheaper) than an equal top of the line 240(ish) gb ssd. With a raid 1 2tb hybrid for actual mass storage, that should be good.
Yeah... I am excited. I just need to do a few last things. I can get most of the machine arranged before the ssd's arrive. Those can fit into trays really easily, and be a snap in if I have the connections and power cords arranged as if they were here. Then just pop them in and install the OS. I may setup the drives to allow partitions for several linux systems. I know you can dual boot, choosing linux and a win OS, not sure if you can do three systems. Though, I bet if you went thumb drive, which I am hoping to do for another version of linux anyway, it... might could work! *pop, fizzle, crackle?* We'll see. Though the thumbdrive might be used on another system first.
Oh, and I best try to order those geese. Two this month, two next month, if at all possible. Three will be bigger, one will be slightly smaller. Oh... but before I order those, I need to see if the recipients even want them. No matter how nice something is, if you aren't set up to cook it... It might well be like handing a bachelor two or three live lobster. Urhm, most bachelors. I actually have what it takes to cook up to, say, four, all at once... more in rotation. Most can't, bachelor or not. Well, no five pounders mind you, just pound to pound and an halfers.
Later, or good night. Later, probably. :p
.
I did do a minor portion of the dishes. I may do more. Running slow as my body sorts medicines out. I did read the manuals that came with the motherboard and video card. Wow, that was a lot of nothing. The motherboard offered some information, but raised far more questions than not. Especially regarding configuring the bios.
It would suggest things you could turn on or off but give no reason for doing either. '"In the next step, set Auto-deconformation to 0, 1, or 3. If, while booting, the computer screams at you in French, you will know this is the problem. Go ahead and power the system back down, unplug the power source, then use the jumpers to delete the memory. Then, while the system is still powered down, reset the switch to one of the two remaining choices. Repeat until the system stops screaming at you in French."' Yeah, only, actually, they give you no idea if you will know if you did it wrong or not. The thing is, some of these might be key to fully utilizing some of your system. And there is no guarantee that default will work.
Oh, no worries. I'll figure it out. I figure I will do just fine. It will be a step by step walk through having everything up and running, using testing software to square off the areas too rounded, or round off those parts that are too square. Oh, about the raid 10... I will be using four inexpensive 120 gb ssds. They aren't the absolute blazing fastest, but are good enough, as is. With a raid 10, I will end up with 240gb at double their rate, which will make them safer, faster, and sum total no more expensive (and probably cheaper) than an equal top of the line 240(ish) gb ssd. With a raid 1 2tb hybrid for actual mass storage, that should be good.
Yeah... I am excited. I just need to do a few last things. I can get most of the machine arranged before the ssd's arrive. Those can fit into trays really easily, and be a snap in if I have the connections and power cords arranged as if they were here. Then just pop them in and install the OS. I may setup the drives to allow partitions for several linux systems. I know you can dual boot, choosing linux and a win OS, not sure if you can do three systems. Though, I bet if you went thumb drive, which I am hoping to do for another version of linux anyway, it... might could work! *pop, fizzle, crackle?* We'll see. Though the thumbdrive might be used on another system first.
Oh, and I best try to order those geese. Two this month, two next month, if at all possible. Three will be bigger, one will be slightly smaller. Oh... but before I order those, I need to see if the recipients even want them. No matter how nice something is, if you aren't set up to cook it... It might well be like handing a bachelor two or three live lobster. Urhm, most bachelors. I actually have what it takes to cook up to, say, four, all at once... more in rotation. Most can't, bachelor or not. Well, no five pounders mind you, just pound to pound and an halfers.
Later, or good night. Later, probably. :p
Thursday, October 29, 2015
Always something.
.
.
I do make the attempt. I do as good as I can do. I push, aim, arrange, figure, sweat, and bleed to make things work. Even so, things just slip. Medicine. I don't think it has been more than a day or two. And I can, and will, get right back on it. I don't think I missed too much so that I will have to crawl out of trouble. But I am a bit off. I may lose a day or two. And I did notice before all hell broke out. I will say it is not fair. I will also admit that, while that is true, that isn't an excuse, or even reason, to surrender or even to cover for mistakes. It's simply one more hurdle with which we all must contend. So... back on meds.
As for today? I don't know. I wondered why things were slowing, didn't get to much, though some, yesterday. I was dragging and could not find the sweet-spot I knew should have been there. Later in the day, or as I went to bed I think more likely, I realized the problem. I am hoping to at least kick out the dishes, at least a general wash, and then take a shower today. If I can get that done, then maybe work a bit more in the living room. It's possible. Not likely, not probable, simply possible. Oh, and start meds back up. Mostly just woke. Days and nights are slipping, though they were before medicines slipped. So little sun, then add in overcast days and... They all feed each other. Some of it I can do something about, some of it not so much. Back to doing what I can about what I can though.
Sleep is pretty good. I am not in any real pain. Life is actually fine, today. Yeah, I'll just get back onboard and cruise as if nothing went wrong. And, maybe, that will be good enough this time. Later.
.
I do make the attempt. I do as good as I can do. I push, aim, arrange, figure, sweat, and bleed to make things work. Even so, things just slip. Medicine. I don't think it has been more than a day or two. And I can, and will, get right back on it. I don't think I missed too much so that I will have to crawl out of trouble. But I am a bit off. I may lose a day or two. And I did notice before all hell broke out. I will say it is not fair. I will also admit that, while that is true, that isn't an excuse, or even reason, to surrender or even to cover for mistakes. It's simply one more hurdle with which we all must contend. So... back on meds.
As for today? I don't know. I wondered why things were slowing, didn't get to much, though some, yesterday. I was dragging and could not find the sweet-spot I knew should have been there. Later in the day, or as I went to bed I think more likely, I realized the problem. I am hoping to at least kick out the dishes, at least a general wash, and then take a shower today. If I can get that done, then maybe work a bit more in the living room. It's possible. Not likely, not probable, simply possible. Oh, and start meds back up. Mostly just woke. Days and nights are slipping, though they were before medicines slipped. So little sun, then add in overcast days and... They all feed each other. Some of it I can do something about, some of it not so much. Back to doing what I can about what I can though.
Sleep is pretty good. I am not in any real pain. Life is actually fine, today. Yeah, I'll just get back onboard and cruise as if nothing went wrong. And, maybe, that will be good enough this time. Later.
Wednesday, October 28, 2015
Some things are coming together.
.
.
I am about to hit dishes... once dinner has settled. Eggs. Nothing terribly fancy, and yet I wanted to do just a bit more than plain. My hunger is terrible lately. As if I could eat a bear. And, if put to it, I just might. My hunger has replaced the drive that had been for fluid. This is a good sign, a sign of health returning. I spent three or four days eating and eating and eating. Getting out, whether sneaking or doing it properly, and eating each time. Eating lots of food, until it hurt, actually. HUNGRY!!! At this point I am trying to... slow that down. So, an four egg omelet was the plan. I added cheese at the end, cream into the eggs for a bit of fluff, and spent a bit by slicing green olives to be added. Delicious, and petite, at least compared to more recent meals.
Dishes will be hit shortly. Then some more work in the living room. Just before posting this, I was nailing some things down for my computer. I have decided to put the thing together, for the most part, but stall on the OS until next month. I have decided to go with a raid 10, which means more drives. But I wanted true ssd's. No, not top of the line. And rather small. But very good mid-weights. The two hybrids will go into a raid 1 config. Why? Security (of data), and performance, for the raid 10. Simple security (of data) for raid 1. I should be able to boot quite quickly this way. The ssd's, however, aren't in the budget until next month. Yes, I am having fun and going out a bit on this build. Oh... even so, it is still quite reasonable. As the video board fades, say in six months to a year, I will probably add a twin. Two cards will keep the system near the top for... some time. Even if just having one board, currently, is just slightly over average.
I have considered updating the hp I am using, for a bit more life. It is an old machine, boasting a well out-of-date amd am2+ socket, and not even a top of the line chip (if it probably was at the time, or near it). The memory is at 7, the board will only accept 8gb, not sure it is worth it to try to find, then buy, that extra gb, and of ddr2 memory. Not sure it's available, if I am pretty sure the cost to advantage for the boost just wouldn't really be there. A 1, perhaps 2gb video card might really help, as well as the fastest sata I hard drive I could find. Sata I, or II? Something. I have the link to the manufacturer model and serial number machine. In any case, a fast hdd, hybrid, or ssd would really bring some life to this old machine, make it useful for a rather longish time. Though those things might require a new power source. It has a 300 watt system. But the stock power sources are pretty ratty in most prebuilts. That's their margin builder. Why? Having two machines allows backup, and offers a means of figuring out what component failed when something goes wrong. Plus... it's something to do.
Yes. Dishes, then maybe another shower, or even a bath. And then on to the living room. I really am digging down in. The goal, if I can get to it tonight, is to have the full area for microfacturing (nano?) the computer ready. Dusting, vacuuming, setting out the mat, figuring out which outlet I can use, and putting parts within easy reach. If I can do that much, I may try to clear off the other couch and the side table/lamp stand. And, maybe, breaking down boxes. Lots and lots of boxes. I might even put those into the back of the Xter so that, if I make it to town Friday, I can get those in too. Yes, I am enjoying this. I am trying. I love it when I have things to do, even if I keep stalling and adding and... stalling... and adding. :p
Hmm. Something to sip. Then a bit of a rest, research can be daunting. Then on to wherever I can. Later.
.
I am about to hit dishes... once dinner has settled. Eggs. Nothing terribly fancy, and yet I wanted to do just a bit more than plain. My hunger is terrible lately. As if I could eat a bear. And, if put to it, I just might. My hunger has replaced the drive that had been for fluid. This is a good sign, a sign of health returning. I spent three or four days eating and eating and eating. Getting out, whether sneaking or doing it properly, and eating each time. Eating lots of food, until it hurt, actually. HUNGRY!!! At this point I am trying to... slow that down. So, an four egg omelet was the plan. I added cheese at the end, cream into the eggs for a bit of fluff, and spent a bit by slicing green olives to be added. Delicious, and petite, at least compared to more recent meals.
Dishes will be hit shortly. Then some more work in the living room. Just before posting this, I was nailing some things down for my computer. I have decided to put the thing together, for the most part, but stall on the OS until next month. I have decided to go with a raid 10, which means more drives. But I wanted true ssd's. No, not top of the line. And rather small. But very good mid-weights. The two hybrids will go into a raid 1 config. Why? Security (of data), and performance, for the raid 10. Simple security (of data) for raid 1. I should be able to boot quite quickly this way. The ssd's, however, aren't in the budget until next month. Yes, I am having fun and going out a bit on this build. Oh... even so, it is still quite reasonable. As the video board fades, say in six months to a year, I will probably add a twin. Two cards will keep the system near the top for... some time. Even if just having one board, currently, is just slightly over average.
I have considered updating the hp I am using, for a bit more life. It is an old machine, boasting a well out-of-date amd am2+ socket, and not even a top of the line chip (if it probably was at the time, or near it). The memory is at 7, the board will only accept 8gb, not sure it is worth it to try to find, then buy, that extra gb, and of ddr2 memory. Not sure it's available, if I am pretty sure the cost to advantage for the boost just wouldn't really be there. A 1, perhaps 2gb video card might really help, as well as the fastest sata I hard drive I could find. Sata I, or II? Something. I have the link to the manufacturer model and serial number machine. In any case, a fast hdd, hybrid, or ssd would really bring some life to this old machine, make it useful for a rather longish time. Though those things might require a new power source. It has a 300 watt system. But the stock power sources are pretty ratty in most prebuilts. That's their margin builder. Why? Having two machines allows backup, and offers a means of figuring out what component failed when something goes wrong. Plus... it's something to do.
Yes. Dishes, then maybe another shower, or even a bath. And then on to the living room. I really am digging down in. The goal, if I can get to it tonight, is to have the full area for microfacturing (nano?) the computer ready. Dusting, vacuuming, setting out the mat, figuring out which outlet I can use, and putting parts within easy reach. If I can do that much, I may try to clear off the other couch and the side table/lamp stand. And, maybe, breaking down boxes. Lots and lots of boxes. I might even put those into the back of the Xter so that, if I make it to town Friday, I can get those in too. Yes, I am enjoying this. I am trying. I love it when I have things to do, even if I keep stalling and adding and... stalling... and adding. :p
Hmm. Something to sip. Then a bit of a rest, research can be daunting. Then on to wherever I can. Later.
I ended up crashing just after that last post.
.
.
It's like I hit a wall. I went to bed very late... 2:30 to 4:00, somewhere in there. Couldn't sleep, that is slipping. So waking at 6:00 or 7:00 was going to make it tough. Why I woke I can't say, but I woke as if booting fully in a second. Not a usual wake, so something woke me. Might have been the girls, or a very loud vehicle, or someone around the house. Ah, a package was delivered, that might have been it? No... not that early. The package must have arrived after I went back to bed. I then didn't wake until 13:30 or so.
It got chilly last night. This morning, I believe shortly after the first wake, the thermo suggested it had gotten down to 38, at least. It is overcast, so probably hasn't warmed much during the day. Hmm... Why did it seem to daylight bright so early? I don't know. Maybe I was more asleep still, and couldn't put things together correctly, than I thought? It just seems as if it was relatively bright when I woke already. Didn't need lights. And, yet, most mornings, at that time now, the sun isn't close to being up? Bleh... I'll... think on that one. Odd though. I sometimes really wonder if I do indeed live in some sort of artificial environment, such as the Matrix. If you are an half click out of things, they can really play with your gourd. Between your conscious shy mind and even minor doses of medication, they can really tinker in there. Not sure how they could attenuate, alter, or direct your thinking/dreams. Though if they have mind patterning down, they might be able to do so to some degree, even if they aren't fully able to know what they are doing. It wouldn't have to be the whole population... just one guy, in a coma, off the grid, who the government allows them to play with. Unmarried veterans would be an easy mark. And, no, I have no doubts they would work us over if they could.
On the good side of things, since, or because of, the crash, I am feeling good, better, ready to... actually to probably take another nap shortly, then get some work done when I get the need for sleep out of my system, one way or another. Perhaps coffee, or coffee and a shower, will do it. I'll wash the dishes first, set them out, shower, then put them back in for a soak. Yeah, remember, they have their own little plastic tub that I use for a wash basin. Even I have... ill thoughts about washing my body and dishes in the same place. Bleh! I'm... nervous about weird stuff... and that idea, to me, is weird... unless you really scrub a standard use tub after personal washes. I keep it clean, but not every time, thus a little tub for in the tub. Plus, a full tub of water is a lot more water than I want to use for dishes. I do live in a desert, mostly.
Oh, what arrived today was a... curiosity. Someone suggested something about mooncakes, a Chinese rare delight, only served rarely... one short period of time per year, and this was that time. It's a cake, and... filling, all surrounding a cooked salted egg yolk. I received several. Okay. I have eaten half of one. And, I have to say, this is not my favorite. There are other flavors. This one is lotus seed, I believe. But there is red bean, mung bean, and several other types. I ordered several. Unfortunately, I could either order some with salted egg yolks but all the same flavor or a multi-flavor pack but without the yolks. I will offer these to some folk who might enjoy at least the experience. As, while I will probably not consume these again, save as a social gesture if called upon, I do like that I have tried something totally foreign and with only the slightest of encouragement. Both are good things. Perhaps I can lend that on. I'm chalking this up as a good thing. I do suspect that a pastry chef who knows how to do these, and makes them fresh and without the need for preservatives, these might be much better. Think packaged apple pie versus mom's fully home-made apple pie. Yeah. So, I... would like to try these fresh, someday, if the opportunity arises.
Oh. While I work in the living room, soon or later this day, I won't be stopping at just arranging a work area. I am hoping to open the living room back up, fully. Even to where I vacuum, and wet/steam vac, again. I may be onto another push to get and keep the cave clean. Health might be returning. It is worth the effort, if I have it to spend. Later.
.
It's like I hit a wall. I went to bed very late... 2:30 to 4:00, somewhere in there. Couldn't sleep, that is slipping. So waking at 6:00 or 7:00 was going to make it tough. Why I woke I can't say, but I woke as if booting fully in a second. Not a usual wake, so something woke me. Might have been the girls, or a very loud vehicle, or someone around the house. Ah, a package was delivered, that might have been it? No... not that early. The package must have arrived after I went back to bed. I then didn't wake until 13:30 or so.
It got chilly last night. This morning, I believe shortly after the first wake, the thermo suggested it had gotten down to 38, at least. It is overcast, so probably hasn't warmed much during the day. Hmm... Why did it seem to daylight bright so early? I don't know. Maybe I was more asleep still, and couldn't put things together correctly, than I thought? It just seems as if it was relatively bright when I woke already. Didn't need lights. And, yet, most mornings, at that time now, the sun isn't close to being up? Bleh... I'll... think on that one. Odd though. I sometimes really wonder if I do indeed live in some sort of artificial environment, such as the Matrix. If you are an half click out of things, they can really play with your gourd. Between your conscious shy mind and even minor doses of medication, they can really tinker in there. Not sure how they could attenuate, alter, or direct your thinking/dreams. Though if they have mind patterning down, they might be able to do so to some degree, even if they aren't fully able to know what they are doing. It wouldn't have to be the whole population... just one guy, in a coma, off the grid, who the government allows them to play with. Unmarried veterans would be an easy mark. And, no, I have no doubts they would work us over if they could.
On the good side of things, since, or because of, the crash, I am feeling good, better, ready to... actually to probably take another nap shortly, then get some work done when I get the need for sleep out of my system, one way or another. Perhaps coffee, or coffee and a shower, will do it. I'll wash the dishes first, set them out, shower, then put them back in for a soak. Yeah, remember, they have their own little plastic tub that I use for a wash basin. Even I have... ill thoughts about washing my body and dishes in the same place. Bleh! I'm... nervous about weird stuff... and that idea, to me, is weird... unless you really scrub a standard use tub after personal washes. I keep it clean, but not every time, thus a little tub for in the tub. Plus, a full tub of water is a lot more water than I want to use for dishes. I do live in a desert, mostly.
Oh, what arrived today was a... curiosity. Someone suggested something about mooncakes, a Chinese rare delight, only served rarely... one short period of time per year, and this was that time. It's a cake, and... filling, all surrounding a cooked salted egg yolk. I received several. Okay. I have eaten half of one. And, I have to say, this is not my favorite. There are other flavors. This one is lotus seed, I believe. But there is red bean, mung bean, and several other types. I ordered several. Unfortunately, I could either order some with salted egg yolks but all the same flavor or a multi-flavor pack but without the yolks. I will offer these to some folk who might enjoy at least the experience. As, while I will probably not consume these again, save as a social gesture if called upon, I do like that I have tried something totally foreign and with only the slightest of encouragement. Both are good things. Perhaps I can lend that on. I'm chalking this up as a good thing. I do suspect that a pastry chef who knows how to do these, and makes them fresh and without the need for preservatives, these might be much better. Think packaged apple pie versus mom's fully home-made apple pie. Yeah. So, I... would like to try these fresh, someday, if the opportunity arises.
Oh. While I work in the living room, soon or later this day, I won't be stopping at just arranging a work area. I am hoping to open the living room back up, fully. Even to where I vacuum, and wet/steam vac, again. I may be onto another push to get and keep the cave clean. Health might be returning. It is worth the effort, if I have it to spend. Later.
Rough and gruff.
.
.
Oh, reasons, perhaps. Not enough, not nearly enough, sleep. Still feeling a bit battered about the margins, and more. Though to be truth, feeling battered is better than feeling green about the gills. Still, battered is bruised is painful. I have started being hungry again. While a good sign, it is... a driving factor, one I am not quite ready to manage fully. I did make it to town, bought milk, fruits, eggs, butter, and cream... so, with a few other things, perhaps I can manage some feeding needs. And, of course, what is happening in the world.
Republicans are absolutely flouting that they don't give a flying fuck what the base and more and more independents want. Choosing Ryan, a worse cuckservative than even Boehner, to fill that position tells me that there is no conservative power, or will, in D.C. Our politicians are actively, and brutally, anti-American at this point. My guess is they realized how easy it was to sell out to rich Americans, but realized the rest of the world had even richer people and chose to open the bidding for their votes to those as well. Chinese government and billionaires, muslim oil barons, even minor despots here and there, all vying for a US vote. No wonder our "reps" see no reason for a border. At this point, resisting this government in every way possible, until it is broken and defeated or begins a shooting war at which point we will see how that plays out, is the only way forward. I am calling broken arrow. The enemy is not just in camp, they are in C&C and putting out bad calls. Resist, fully.
I did, since I got out obviously, get another shower in. Love those. A bath would be better, I just don't have the energy. Plus, I set the dishes up after the shower last not. Then, to town and shopping. Plus, when I returned home, I began tearing into the living room. I have the loveseat open, and part of the short table (coffee table really) that I will be working on. I had forgotten to buy something. The fans I wanted. I had forgotten that I had held off on those until the case arrived and I could give it a solid review. Various online sources had... either contradictory or confusing (comparing one to another) views on what the case could actually hold as far as fans go... and what came with it. Those were ordered and should be here by Friday. More time, which I ended up needing, to get that area sorted. And, I think, Friday is payday. A good thing, as I have some gifts to get (if available), and a new power protector outlet... for the second machine and to ensure grounding through the power supply while I work on the machine. Bleh.
Oh, something I just realized a few days ago. As bad as it might seem, life truly has improved. As for the bad? Most likely I am simply more aware of it. It isn't worse, mostly, even if it seems like it. This is the first year since I have been ill in which I was able to figure out calendars... the type you hang on the wall? Yep. Just changing them at, or near, the first of each month. This is the first year I have been able to be aware of the flow of time enough to do that. Not even in college was I able to do that. A simple thing, but... a huge thing. Even last year, there were months that would go by without me noticing the change.
Well, on to... waking? Yes. Later.
.
Oh, reasons, perhaps. Not enough, not nearly enough, sleep. Still feeling a bit battered about the margins, and more. Though to be truth, feeling battered is better than feeling green about the gills. Still, battered is bruised is painful. I have started being hungry again. While a good sign, it is... a driving factor, one I am not quite ready to manage fully. I did make it to town, bought milk, fruits, eggs, butter, and cream... so, with a few other things, perhaps I can manage some feeding needs. And, of course, what is happening in the world.
Republicans are absolutely flouting that they don't give a flying fuck what the base and more and more independents want. Choosing Ryan, a worse cuckservative than even Boehner, to fill that position tells me that there is no conservative power, or will, in D.C. Our politicians are actively, and brutally, anti-American at this point. My guess is they realized how easy it was to sell out to rich Americans, but realized the rest of the world had even richer people and chose to open the bidding for their votes to those as well. Chinese government and billionaires, muslim oil barons, even minor despots here and there, all vying for a US vote. No wonder our "reps" see no reason for a border. At this point, resisting this government in every way possible, until it is broken and defeated or begins a shooting war at which point we will see how that plays out, is the only way forward. I am calling broken arrow. The enemy is not just in camp, they are in C&C and putting out bad calls. Resist, fully.
I did, since I got out obviously, get another shower in. Love those. A bath would be better, I just don't have the energy. Plus, I set the dishes up after the shower last not. Then, to town and shopping. Plus, when I returned home, I began tearing into the living room. I have the loveseat open, and part of the short table (coffee table really) that I will be working on. I had forgotten to buy something. The fans I wanted. I had forgotten that I had held off on those until the case arrived and I could give it a solid review. Various online sources had... either contradictory or confusing (comparing one to another) views on what the case could actually hold as far as fans go... and what came with it. Those were ordered and should be here by Friday. More time, which I ended up needing, to get that area sorted. And, I think, Friday is payday. A good thing, as I have some gifts to get (if available), and a new power protector outlet... for the second machine and to ensure grounding through the power supply while I work on the machine. Bleh.
Oh, something I just realized a few days ago. As bad as it might seem, life truly has improved. As for the bad? Most likely I am simply more aware of it. It isn't worse, mostly, even if it seems like it. This is the first year since I have been ill in which I was able to figure out calendars... the type you hang on the wall? Yep. Just changing them at, or near, the first of each month. This is the first year I have been able to be aware of the flow of time enough to do that. Not even in college was I able to do that. A simple thing, but... a huge thing. Even last year, there were months that would go by without me noticing the change.
Well, on to... waking? Yes. Later.
Tuesday, October 27, 2015
Well, maybe.
.
.
Okay. Not bad. I actually finished the laundry yesterday. Not only washing, but yes, folding or hanging and putting it all away. I finished the last of the old dishes I had going for so long, and collected all the "new" dirty dishes. After a shower, those will go in. And the electronics mat arrived, with the last of the items I bought. The only thing that might hang things a bit is wanting to add a few fans. Perhaps they can be found locally though. The size, for some, is the problem... 230 mm fans aren't exactly typical. Black would be fine, but blue would be better.
I didn't just go with standard whatall, for the computer. And yet I didn't push the style envelope, just a few touches. It's sort of like when buying a new car. Sure, you can get the leather interior, the hyper-tech package, the whitewalls (don't offer those these days, innit?), or whatnot. But really, go with what you need, the color you want if possible, a few luxuries, but stick with the basics. Going over too far and you end up with a one of a kind. Sounds good until you need to fix something. Same with computers. Still, I allowed for a bit of play, to my liking. Sad thing is, others might not even know. I remember a middle aged woman who had foot problems. Her husband suggested that she chose style over comfort or health with her shoes. I... don't think, from the look on his face, that I said the right thing. I will tell you, however, that many rich people have really sucky taste. I guess their taste is by price? Exclusiveness is more important than the rest? Because her shoes, and trust me on this darlings, looked like little old lady shoes. My lady of the time heard the whole thing. Oh, she agreed with me, but was such a suckup that she was ashamed I had spoken the truth. *grins* I like dames, more so when I do my thing with them. Good fight, Good God, good sex. *wink*
Anyway... A shower, then a soak for the new dishes. Then a bit of a rest, and... who knows. I might move on to a few, or many, other tasks. Sleep is off, but I'm not going to let that get in the way. Work the hours you are awake, don't try to force a schedule you can't keep. I've learned that over and over and over and it finally stuck. If I can't work, then I'll hit the schedule. Do what you can, when you can. Don't just do something, sit there, if all else fails. Which... it does, from time to time. Simply not my preferred however.
Now that I'm finished twisting notions and causing nose bleeds from this or that, I'll... go get wet. *smile* It's as close as taking a long walk off a short pier as you get, so hold it dear. Later.
.
Okay. Not bad. I actually finished the laundry yesterday. Not only washing, but yes, folding or hanging and putting it all away. I finished the last of the old dishes I had going for so long, and collected all the "new" dirty dishes. After a shower, those will go in. And the electronics mat arrived, with the last of the items I bought. The only thing that might hang things a bit is wanting to add a few fans. Perhaps they can be found locally though. The size, for some, is the problem... 230 mm fans aren't exactly typical. Black would be fine, but blue would be better.
I didn't just go with standard whatall, for the computer. And yet I didn't push the style envelope, just a few touches. It's sort of like when buying a new car. Sure, you can get the leather interior, the hyper-tech package, the whitewalls (don't offer those these days, innit?), or whatnot. But really, go with what you need, the color you want if possible, a few luxuries, but stick with the basics. Going over too far and you end up with a one of a kind. Sounds good until you need to fix something. Same with computers. Still, I allowed for a bit of play, to my liking. Sad thing is, others might not even know. I remember a middle aged woman who had foot problems. Her husband suggested that she chose style over comfort or health with her shoes. I... don't think, from the look on his face, that I said the right thing. I will tell you, however, that many rich people have really sucky taste. I guess their taste is by price? Exclusiveness is more important than the rest? Because her shoes, and trust me on this darlings, looked like little old lady shoes. My lady of the time heard the whole thing. Oh, she agreed with me, but was such a suckup that she was ashamed I had spoken the truth. *grins* I like dames, more so when I do my thing with them. Good fight, Good God, good sex. *wink*
Anyway... A shower, then a soak for the new dishes. Then a bit of a rest, and... who knows. I might move on to a few, or many, other tasks. Sleep is off, but I'm not going to let that get in the way. Work the hours you are awake, don't try to force a schedule you can't keep. I've learned that over and over and over and it finally stuck. If I can't work, then I'll hit the schedule. Do what you can, when you can. Don't just do something, sit there, if all else fails. Which... it does, from time to time. Simply not my preferred however.
Now that I'm finished twisting notions and causing nose bleeds from this or that, I'll... go get wet. *smile* It's as close as taking a long walk off a short pier as you get, so hold it dear. Later.
Monday, October 26, 2015
I've known my share.
.
.
Dunno, just daydreaming as I was going through my last few days. Something was bubbling up. Then I saw a song and thought, oh, so... that's the deal. Yeah. Those I have known have been mild to maximum. I have learned that, save for some of the special cases, to know one is to choose or make one. Every once in a while there is one just because.
.
Dunno, just daydreaming as I was going through my last few days. Something was bubbling up. Then I saw a song and thought, oh, so... that's the deal. Yeah. Those I have known have been mild to maximum. I have learned that, save for some of the special cases, to know one is to choose or make one. Every once in a while there is one just because.
New day, new week.
.
.
My bedtime keeps slipping. With it, of course, my wake time is getting later. No real fuss, with the sun becoming more like a distant cousin than a household family member, and cool returning, this is more likely to happen. Feeling a bit rough, haven't sloughed that since I cut back insulin. Not sure it was just about that, if that didn't help. More, I am still not sure about supply. Keeps the cage rattled.
I forgot to take the trash to the curb last night, or get the last bag to the big bin. I woke, I think, in time to get that done, if I hurried. Which I did. The girls aren't used to me moving that fast first thing. They are still, usually, sleepy too first thing. Remember that cats sleep off and on all day. Sleep, then food, then voiding. You get everything that remains... expect for their grooming time, play time (though they might use you in some of that), and some other things. Okay, lets face it... humans are great big, warmed, lounges... with massage and scratching built in. But not the belly! In any case, all moved quickly enough that, in his hasted, the cave ogre didn't run over or step on any delicate part of the other residents. Though I think it may have been close. Sassy always gives me a funny look when she has been made to scamper, or even fear. Sam doesn't really care. She'll write it in her book and balance the books later, doesn't bother with dirty or weird or hurt feeling looks.
I should know within an hour or two if I made it out early enough. While they have actually quieted the trucks quite a bit, they are still fairly loud, slow, or more deliberate, roving devices. Strange now, that no one gets out. I almost don't think about it, but it used to be that someone drove and someone would hop out and dump the trash in. I guess there were too many men hurt doing that. You know, for equality's sake, why didn't women ever demand equal opportunity in that job? If they don't do the bad, why should they be allowed to enjoy the good? If equality is to be entertained, let us entertain it fully, in a mandatory way, as it is half being done currently.
Awake, not too gruff, not at all actually, and ready for... something. Or I will be before long. I just need to wake. Later.
.
My bedtime keeps slipping. With it, of course, my wake time is getting later. No real fuss, with the sun becoming more like a distant cousin than a household family member, and cool returning, this is more likely to happen. Feeling a bit rough, haven't sloughed that since I cut back insulin. Not sure it was just about that, if that didn't help. More, I am still not sure about supply. Keeps the cage rattled.
I forgot to take the trash to the curb last night, or get the last bag to the big bin. I woke, I think, in time to get that done, if I hurried. Which I did. The girls aren't used to me moving that fast first thing. They are still, usually, sleepy too first thing. Remember that cats sleep off and on all day. Sleep, then food, then voiding. You get everything that remains... expect for their grooming time, play time (though they might use you in some of that), and some other things. Okay, lets face it... humans are great big, warmed, lounges... with massage and scratching built in. But not the belly! In any case, all moved quickly enough that, in his hasted, the cave ogre didn't run over or step on any delicate part of the other residents. Though I think it may have been close. Sassy always gives me a funny look when she has been made to scamper, or even fear. Sam doesn't really care. She'll write it in her book and balance the books later, doesn't bother with dirty or weird or hurt feeling looks.
I should know within an hour or two if I made it out early enough. While they have actually quieted the trucks quite a bit, they are still fairly loud, slow, or more deliberate, roving devices. Strange now, that no one gets out. I almost don't think about it, but it used to be that someone drove and someone would hop out and dump the trash in. I guess there were too many men hurt doing that. You know, for equality's sake, why didn't women ever demand equal opportunity in that job? If they don't do the bad, why should they be allowed to enjoy the good? If equality is to be entertained, let us entertain it fully, in a mandatory way, as it is half being done currently.
Awake, not too gruff, not at all actually, and ready for... something. Or I will be before long. I just need to wake. Later.
Sunday, October 25, 2015
New tech, old problems.
.
.
Windows 7? Better for stability, and gaming. Also full of holes. Not as bad as 8, 8.1, and definitely not as bad as 10. Those leave the doors unlocked, windows open, and provide maps to private data, not just for MS but for .gov, .corp, .mil, .int, .cop, but .crook too. More holes than a "no shooting" sign in backwater Iowa. Just getting it hooked up without becoming infected is a trick. Can't trust service providers, they sold out and give up on any request without ever even letting you know you are directly being hacked. Black courts decide, or more rubber stamp, the decision to flout your God given rights.
No, probably can't really win, but I can make them earn their blood money. And, so, I am looking at ways of doing this and that. The thing is, if you go too far in the opposite direction of .gov you land in a pure .crook. They are quite similar. One just wants all your information, connections, proclivities, and such. The other is really only interested in your accounts. Both, given enough laxity from scrutiny, will kill you dead, only the reasons are slightly different, up front. In the end they are the same, to cover their sins... which, oddly, they deny exist. Stalin didn't like the world to know that he murdered 40 million of his own, at least. In spite of not believing, somehow, that the butchery was evil. Odd how even those without a conscience or understanding of God know what they do is evil. As to what is going on in the Catholic church? Just understand, Stalin was well trained by the Jesuits. Yeah, really should ban that group from the church, for good and all.
Anyway... there are little ways and whiles. None of them are perfect. None of them will work if your system is already jacked. Assume all Windows machines connected to the internet for any time are hacked. So... best to do these sorts of things before introducing viruses, trojans, and the like. Might even look at how to freeze off components, once installed. Flashing, erasing, eliminating. The problem is that there are so many components with their own sorts of memory. Some are required, but may be infected. Anything made in China is suspect. Did you read that sentence? Yes, it's true.
Don't think of this as paranoia. These are simply the facts. If you aren't aware of them, that doesn't change their nature. You probably don't know that you can only fall just so fast through space... actually through that atmosphere. You will only "fall" in space if there is a significantly dense mass close enough to pull you. There is a limit as to how fast you can fall in the atmosphere due to a number of factors, it is called the terminal velocity. Due to friction and a few other things, this may vary from object to object, object to person, and person to person. Just because you did not know that does not make it not so, nor does me knowing it make me... confused. I'll happily bet money on it. Why don't you know? Because it is too difficult for most to handle, change, without, you know, actually realizing the fix we are in, and even so, most are too weak to challenge authority. And... it might be dangerous to attempt to sidestep, trip that up, or figure a way to be invisible. But it is true.
Still, I am looking at ways. I figure most security suites are corrupted. Men in black have visited and laid out the rules, big corporations have suggested their OS's won't operate without holes for themselves, other .corps, and .gov. And courts have been corrupted to rule silently, and against freedom. So, I have to look at this practically. I might be able to create small windows of privacy. I might be able to shut off snooper for a bit. But the game is rigged. Still, if I can get it to work, just a bit... We'll see.
Just... mansplaining a few things for the world. Manspreading, ideologically, for all to see. Yeah. I'm not a modern man. I'm a real one. With a bit of a penchant for not going along to get along. *wink* The machine isn't together, and the last of the last (save maybe a few connectors or extenders) should be in by Tuesday, so a start probably Wednesday. So I have a bit of time to try to figure out how to set things as cautiously as possible. James Bond never had to do these things quite so diy, mostly. But then they almost always knew what, or who, he was doing. Not my gig.
Oh, and I may have found the type of dog I want. Maybe? What do you think? I'm thinking... easy to clean up after, cheap to feed, no worries about frostbitten paws in winter or overheating in summer. Can take everywhere, if I can teach him to be quiet. And, while not a fighter, an excellent dog to lead off a major predator or act as a barking alarm that is difficult to quiet!
ht Blur Brain
.
Windows 7? Better for stability, and gaming. Also full of holes. Not as bad as 8, 8.1, and definitely not as bad as 10. Those leave the doors unlocked, windows open, and provide maps to private data, not just for MS but for .gov, .corp, .mil, .int, .cop, but .crook too. More holes than a "no shooting" sign in backwater Iowa. Just getting it hooked up without becoming infected is a trick. Can't trust service providers, they sold out and give up on any request without ever even letting you know you are directly being hacked. Black courts decide, or more rubber stamp, the decision to flout your God given rights.
No, probably can't really win, but I can make them earn their blood money. And, so, I am looking at ways of doing this and that. The thing is, if you go too far in the opposite direction of .gov you land in a pure .crook. They are quite similar. One just wants all your information, connections, proclivities, and such. The other is really only interested in your accounts. Both, given enough laxity from scrutiny, will kill you dead, only the reasons are slightly different, up front. In the end they are the same, to cover their sins... which, oddly, they deny exist. Stalin didn't like the world to know that he murdered 40 million of his own, at least. In spite of not believing, somehow, that the butchery was evil. Odd how even those without a conscience or understanding of God know what they do is evil. As to what is going on in the Catholic church? Just understand, Stalin was well trained by the Jesuits. Yeah, really should ban that group from the church, for good and all.
Anyway... there are little ways and whiles. None of them are perfect. None of them will work if your system is already jacked. Assume all Windows machines connected to the internet for any time are hacked. So... best to do these sorts of things before introducing viruses, trojans, and the like. Might even look at how to freeze off components, once installed. Flashing, erasing, eliminating. The problem is that there are so many components with their own sorts of memory. Some are required, but may be infected. Anything made in China is suspect. Did you read that sentence? Yes, it's true.
Don't think of this as paranoia. These are simply the facts. If you aren't aware of them, that doesn't change their nature. You probably don't know that you can only fall just so fast through space... actually through that atmosphere. You will only "fall" in space if there is a significantly dense mass close enough to pull you. There is a limit as to how fast you can fall in the atmosphere due to a number of factors, it is called the terminal velocity. Due to friction and a few other things, this may vary from object to object, object to person, and person to person. Just because you did not know that does not make it not so, nor does me knowing it make me... confused. I'll happily bet money on it. Why don't you know? Because it is too difficult for most to handle, change, without, you know, actually realizing the fix we are in, and even so, most are too weak to challenge authority. And... it might be dangerous to attempt to sidestep, trip that up, or figure a way to be invisible. But it is true.
Still, I am looking at ways. I figure most security suites are corrupted. Men in black have visited and laid out the rules, big corporations have suggested their OS's won't operate without holes for themselves, other .corps, and .gov. And courts have been corrupted to rule silently, and against freedom. So, I have to look at this practically. I might be able to create small windows of privacy. I might be able to shut off snooper for a bit. But the game is rigged. Still, if I can get it to work, just a bit... We'll see.
Just... mansplaining a few things for the world. Manspreading, ideologically, for all to see. Yeah. I'm not a modern man. I'm a real one. With a bit of a penchant for not going along to get along. *wink* The machine isn't together, and the last of the last (save maybe a few connectors or extenders) should be in by Tuesday, so a start probably Wednesday. So I have a bit of time to try to figure out how to set things as cautiously as possible. James Bond never had to do these things quite so diy, mostly. But then they almost always knew what, or who, he was doing. Not my gig.
Oh, and I may have found the type of dog I want. Maybe? What do you think? I'm thinking... easy to clean up after, cheap to feed, no worries about frostbitten paws in winter or overheating in summer. Can take everywhere, if I can teach him to be quiet. And, while not a fighter, an excellent dog to lead off a major predator or act as a barking alarm that is difficult to quiet!
Very short on sleep.
.
.
Playing like I was a kid, I was up all night. There were a number of topics I was doing rough research regarding, interspersed with old music and trying to rebuild some of the lost video elements from the past. Sometimes I just don't remember what song fit that spot, sometimes that music video is gone and even if I do remember, I can't find another copy, or suitable version, of it. I was up until 6:30? Something. And I am waking right at 10:30. Not sure how well this will go. Sometimes it works perfectly, as a life reset. Sometimes the stumble causes me to crash and burn at speed. Odd how when I have a woman these things begin to balance. I still run the clock, either asleep or awake, from time to time. But I recover quicker, usually much quicker. She becomes, mostly, my internal clock.
I'm not feeling bad for the overnighter. Not yet anyway. I dreamed of dealing with a woman, several times, last night. How do you put things? When speaking to a woman, you put them differently. Do you wish her attention and action? Do you want her alliance? Are you going to use her to burn something for you? You, as a man, are the lead. Whether conscious or not, whether with intent or not, when you begin the thing, you do lead regardless. She WILL follow. She will, rightly or wrongly, love or hate you for it. Not that either mean a thing if you are to do what is right in the full breadth of that meaning. Many men simply can't live with being in charge. Much as many parents can't handle being in charge. Ask any teacher where that goes. A headless family is no different. Better to have a poor leader than none. Women are not leaders.
Being a leader isn't about getting what you want, either. It's about serving. Why do you think the head of the family is literally, biblically, compared to being Christ, and the wife is considered the Holy Church? What did Christ do for the Holy Church? He lived, He taught, He sacrificed, He returned to life even then and returned to help a bit more, and He will return again. I'm as close to a man who can do that since, if less than many husbands in other ways... or so far. My problem was I tried to believe women were equal (in order that I could abandon them at some point in their frustrated protestations at my leadership). Then again, modern women are in on that gig. Which is why most divorces are initiated by women. They, even in modernity, 'do their daddy's will". I just, back when I didn't see, didn't bother to marry.
Anyway. As much as I understand there is much that I don't, some that I never will. We aren't machines, we aren't coded, what works there won't work here. Marriage is a patchwork of mutual forgivenesses, bindings, bits of work, and in the end a talent. The relationship itself, in a fallen world, tries to be worldly and end. It takes a lot of effort, on both sides, to mold it, then maintain it. Sometimes on a wing and a prayer, sometimes without the wing.
It was good, even if just in dreams, to have a woman look to me for answers again. Oh, they don't really want answers. In one sense. And yet that is what they get when they ask, and they do ask. Never worry if they disregard your answers. My finest women haven't just been miracle girls, they have been my favored 'no' girls. I expect, often, them to initially not want or like or accept that answer. In time, if I told them true, sometimes I see that they have taken my answer as if they had always believed it. Arguing only delays that. Not on everything, on much. Though, make sure you leave some things very open for her to disagree. First, beside being a woman... a disagreeable sort if I ever saw such... she is also just a human, and must tender notions all her own, even if, deep down, or even closer to the surface, she knows them to be wrong. When I speed five miles over the limit? Same thing. *wink* You, as the husband, are an authority. As such, you must, in some varied ways, be resisted. Just... keep an eye on how far. Inch... mile... Just... saying.
Oh, today? I'm going to work if I can hit that sweet spot. I haven't been doing much, but a little. I will keep that up. I'm doing more work trying to get to work than I am working. Some sort of bottleneck of ill health I suppose. That don't confront me none, so long as I get food once in a while and give it my best. Later.
.
Playing like I was a kid, I was up all night. There were a number of topics I was doing rough research regarding, interspersed with old music and trying to rebuild some of the lost video elements from the past. Sometimes I just don't remember what song fit that spot, sometimes that music video is gone and even if I do remember, I can't find another copy, or suitable version, of it. I was up until 6:30? Something. And I am waking right at 10:30. Not sure how well this will go. Sometimes it works perfectly, as a life reset. Sometimes the stumble causes me to crash and burn at speed. Odd how when I have a woman these things begin to balance. I still run the clock, either asleep or awake, from time to time. But I recover quicker, usually much quicker. She becomes, mostly, my internal clock.
I'm not feeling bad for the overnighter. Not yet anyway. I dreamed of dealing with a woman, several times, last night. How do you put things? When speaking to a woman, you put them differently. Do you wish her attention and action? Do you want her alliance? Are you going to use her to burn something for you? You, as a man, are the lead. Whether conscious or not, whether with intent or not, when you begin the thing, you do lead regardless. She WILL follow. She will, rightly or wrongly, love or hate you for it. Not that either mean a thing if you are to do what is right in the full breadth of that meaning. Many men simply can't live with being in charge. Much as many parents can't handle being in charge. Ask any teacher where that goes. A headless family is no different. Better to have a poor leader than none. Women are not leaders.
Being a leader isn't about getting what you want, either. It's about serving. Why do you think the head of the family is literally, biblically, compared to being Christ, and the wife is considered the Holy Church? What did Christ do for the Holy Church? He lived, He taught, He sacrificed, He returned to life even then and returned to help a bit more, and He will return again. I'm as close to a man who can do that since, if less than many husbands in other ways... or so far. My problem was I tried to believe women were equal (in order that I could abandon them at some point in their frustrated protestations at my leadership). Then again, modern women are in on that gig. Which is why most divorces are initiated by women. They, even in modernity, 'do their daddy's will". I just, back when I didn't see, didn't bother to marry.
Anyway. As much as I understand there is much that I don't, some that I never will. We aren't machines, we aren't coded, what works there won't work here. Marriage is a patchwork of mutual forgivenesses, bindings, bits of work, and in the end a talent. The relationship itself, in a fallen world, tries to be worldly and end. It takes a lot of effort, on both sides, to mold it, then maintain it. Sometimes on a wing and a prayer, sometimes without the wing.
It was good, even if just in dreams, to have a woman look to me for answers again. Oh, they don't really want answers. In one sense. And yet that is what they get when they ask, and they do ask. Never worry if they disregard your answers. My finest women haven't just been miracle girls, they have been my favored 'no' girls. I expect, often, them to initially not want or like or accept that answer. In time, if I told them true, sometimes I see that they have taken my answer as if they had always believed it. Arguing only delays that. Not on everything, on much. Though, make sure you leave some things very open for her to disagree. First, beside being a woman... a disagreeable sort if I ever saw such... she is also just a human, and must tender notions all her own, even if, deep down, or even closer to the surface, she knows them to be wrong. When I speed five miles over the limit? Same thing. *wink* You, as the husband, are an authority. As such, you must, in some varied ways, be resisted. Just... keep an eye on how far. Inch... mile... Just... saying.
Oh, today? I'm going to work if I can hit that sweet spot. I haven't been doing much, but a little. I will keep that up. I'm doing more work trying to get to work than I am working. Some sort of bottleneck of ill health I suppose. That don't confront me none, so long as I get food once in a while and give it my best. Later.
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