Sometimes...

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Pork, beef, chicken... sometimes it is bad.  Sometimes it is good.  And, once in a rare time, it is excellent.  Is it the cooking, the thawing process?  Was it secured, for good or ill, in the packing process?  I just can't say.  All I know is, when it is good, when it was packed right, thawed correctly, stored correctly, cooked as it should be?  It can be absolutely delicious.

I ended up having the pound of pork, if with bone in.  I fried it, pan fried it.  And it came out absolutely delicious.  It wasn't overdone, dry.  But it was done through and through.  It didn't have that grainy texture pork can sometimes have.  It was juicy, had a nice bite, salted just right, and good in every way.

That leg still sure hurts.

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Why?  Well, I don't care.  I just know that, sometimes, it feels like it's on fire.  I went without socks, even though it was very cold yesterday.  Today, socks.  No bandage either day.  But, it has scabbed over.  But it hurt both days, no matter what I do.  I am still hoping to get a showed today.  Always hope.  And, sometimes, more.  God gifted us with hope, plus faith and charity.  Not... just for worship, but for life too.

Blood sugar is 103.  I had some coffee first, leftover from yesterday.  It... can increase blood sugar.  I suspect it did.  Still, okay.

Okay.

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Blood sugar dropped to 93.  Always glad to see that.  For my good behavior, and just because, I am finally having a couple cups of bone broth.  Chicken arrived today.  I used some of that, with the cup left of open beef bone broth.  Some salt, hot spices, and cream as well.  Very nice.

My stomach hurts.  Literally, to the touch.  As if I was recently punched.  Can antibiotics do that?  Or did I bump into something, run into something, fall on my stomach, but not remember?  It really hurts.  Very strange.  I did only take three pills today, because of overdosing of late.  Reducing dosage won't cause that sort of problem.  But, the medicine itself might?

I was wondering.

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Have I been taking too many antibiotics?  Well?  I had to count.  But, maybe.  Or, if the number they had was correct... if they started with forty, as written on the label?  Then... yes.  I am three pills ahead.  Just... had a sense that I was... off.  I'm three pills ahead.  So I am skipping tonight.  Or... more... I am not taking a fifth today?  Right.  

I'm not sure how I got so off, but... part of it was the pain.  When you are in a lot of pain, hitting the gas just happens.  Then, the medicine itself can throw you.  Or me.  That antibiotic is... rather potent.  Between that, else, and wanting to make sure I take the pills, I just overdid a bit.

Coffee?

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And steak!  Oh... love that.  Could only eat half the steak.  But enjoyed the whole half!?!  Something like that.  The rest will be for later, or tomorrow.  I'd still like to try to eat more.  Either frying the burger, or pork chops.  Half a pound more, if I can eat more.  But sure enjoyed some food.  And coffee.

Looked around the internet a bit.  People doing their things.  I'm not worried, even if there are those who would come after me, or some of us.  It... just doesn't matter.  I just hope, if I get to be a martyr, that I can... be a good one.  I'm not sure I feel the need to be hung upside down on a cross, if it gets to that.  That seems... a bit of a drama queen thing.  Just... break me on that wheel the old fashioned way.  It's good enough.  If, too, I do understand the sentiment.  Not... knocking it, completely.  It just isn't my gig.  Though, too, choices may not be offered, and what is given is what is gotten.  Usually?

A bit of gaming, next.  Then a shower.  Then I'll check to see if the ironing board is in.  Then... on to finding the irons.  If all works, perhaps a start on ironing yet today?  Or... getting it set up anyway?  We'll see.

A bit ill.  From the antibiotics, from the wound, from winter, from health of lack of it, if still having moments of nausea just from the debriding.  But there are a lot of things still pushing nausea.  I am surprised I don't toss my cookies two or three times a day.  Would it feel better?  After consuming draino, and chunking that a few times, and the burning from that up and down?  I... haven't been able to vomit easily since.  I have, a few times.  But... it's rare.  And difficult.  Which is the only reason I haven't been tossing.  Still, my body really wants to, it just can't quite get over that... difficulty.

Still, I am enjoying the coffee and steak.  What of it I could eat.  I'll get the rest put up, probably for tomorrow.  And, hopefully, get some burger (probably) fried up for later.  A strange diet, but it works.  Mostly.  Later.

Awake.

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Getting to it?  Maybe, a bit of a start, shortly?

Blood sugar first thing.  Finally, it is... improving as it should.  It is 99 fasting.  Good enough.  I'll take that any day of the week, fasting or later in the day.

Just a bit more out there.

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A few hours ago, that is.  I got back out there, and did just a bit more cleaning up with the scoop.  It really did go a lot more smoothly this second time.  Nice.  The sidewalks, and a place along the driveway, were just clearer better.  The ice that remained was more easily removed.  Only parts of the driveway wouldn't clear all that well.  Better, not as well as the sidewalks.

It was down to thirty two when I got out that last time.  Not... bad.  But it was going from thawed to freezing, and it was showing.  Colder.  The electric vest made that an easy thing though.  But I was getting tired.  Between the infection and the antibiotics, I'm tired.  Still, got to a few things.

Some starts.

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Not much physical?  Mostly.  I did get out to check the walks, and drive.  It's 40 F out there!  With eight to twelve inches of snow.  The sky cleared off.  Bright and shiny, like a cold white beach.  So very bright.  I cleared the path, scooped off a few places where it iced over... and has thawed.  There were some places which just wouldn't lift.

I did what I could.  In spite of being forty, it... sure feels colder.  I wore out pretty quickly.  But, at least I took off some of the ice.  And cleared more furter out, so it won't be as likely to drain back in to some areas, then freeze over again.  I may get back out there again this evening.  If we get something, any time soon, it will be rain.  But, it will go cold and freezing shortly after, or as it grows dark.  This is the part of winter that is most frightening.  Thankfully I don't liver where flooding is more likely.  But, when discussing biblical stages of flooding, no one is safe.

A really good morning.

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Everything, around the edges of my brain, is a bit fluffy.  Antibiotics, but too, it's doing it's thing.  And well.  A little price to pay is worth it.  The pain in my leg is lessening?  A bit.  It's still there, very sharp from time to time.  But, less.  Less severe, less frequent, for shorter spells.  Not... necessarily a good sign, but it is a change.  And, one can hope.

Up twenty before eight, or so.  Can't be sure when I went down.  I am all but certain it was after 19:30.  And, probably, well after.  Into 20:00? 21:00?  If I was up to 22:00, I didn't make it later.  I just... can't be sure.  If I had to guess I would say between 19:30 and 20:30, but I just don't know.  And, yeah, I was looking.  Down here, up there when I went down.  Just... short term memory is fritzed, either from antibiotics, the infection, both, maybe more.  Winter just turned... winter.

Yeah, okay.

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The antibiotics are rough.  I feel like I have been drinking.  I haven't had a drink for... a year, two... three?  It's... been a goodly long time.  Every six months to year and a half, I had been buying some beer.  It was coming due when Budweiser pissed on their shoes.  No, I... never drank B. light.  Or any light beer.  But, it didn't matter.  Further, if that is the way corporations are going, they are going there without me.

I've dumped McDonalds, even Wendy's (though as much for cost as else with the latter).  All the rest.  As much because they are going woke as anything else.  I do wonder if corporations are trying to chase off better people, to bring in the ones they want to eliminate.  Sure, there are blacks and browns on the boards, but Uncle Tom's have been betraying their own forever.

It's warmed up!

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From four to eight, F.  Bleh.  Snowing.  At a pace of about an inch an hour, or more?  We are supposed to get hit hard.  Today.  A day off.  Then hit hard again through the next week.  Daily, for the next most of the next week.  As well, it's supposed to go from a frigid hard snow, to a slushy rain snow mix.  Ugh.  That is the worst of things, especially in mountain and higher elevations.

It looks like, again, we will get as we got last year.  To be honest, we were getting it.  But in the form of rain.  December was rather warm.  So it wasn't accumulating, showing as snow depth.  But we were getting it.  I thought so, but... it's... more difficult to be certain when it is in the form of rain.

Up, reasonably.

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Sleep wasn't all that good.  Pain, now and again, would wake me.  Harshly.  And, really, I never went without hurting through the night, small or large, asleep or awake.  But I did get some rest in there.  I took it, it wasn't given, offered, or generally just available.

Down about a quarter after twenty two hundred, up a quarter to six.  I looked outside, to see if we got more snow.  While we hadn't, we are.  It is coming down in almost a wave.  Heavy, thick, fast.  And it is still cold out there, right at four if my morning eyes saw clearly.

Hmm?

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Blood sugar has been slightly elevated all day.  Stress?  Maybe, from the pain.  But, yes.  Annoying.  Still, just around 126, give or take a few points.  Annoying.

A different game, to play.  Can't focus enough to play the other one.  This one, again, having to learn everything from scratch.  Survival, of sorts.  But, instead of space ships to ride?  Dinosaurs.  Something... different anyway.

Ugh.

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It's a rough day.  I need... something.  Coffee?  Food was good.  couldn't eat much.  Well spiced, good enough.  But... couldn't eat much.  A bit of a fever, for real?  If so, a slight one.  But... maybe.  Pain, cold, fever, sort of a minor bad way in every direction.  Well, no body aches, if the ankle wound is still pretty rough.  Worse from time to time, better about half the time.

Yeah, I think I'll make coffee.  Then, probably, a mug of bone broth, heated, and spiced to high heaven.  With cream in there.  Well, and butter, if that usually, at least for me, generally goes without saying.

Nausea.

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All morning.  Didn't want to drink, or eat, anything.  Not just nausea, a bit feverish?  Or... like that.  Not quite with a fever, just how that feels when I've had one.  Especially with nausea.  Can't throw up, don't have anything in there.

Still, going to try to eat something.  Drink?  No coffee.  That's just too heavy.  I'll take aspirin, with caffeine, for my fix.  Extra spice, the hot stuff, that makes life easier, somehow.  Not sure why, but it just does.  And, later, probably some bone broth, also with hot spices, and extra extra.  It... settles my stomach, strangely.

Finally got some sleep.

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Still hurts like hell, but... I think I got down sometime between four and six.  Was so tired, though, tracking the exact time wasn't possible.  And, it still hurt, waking me through sleep.  Though, finally waking at between ten and ten thirty?  Sometime in there.

Blood sugar wasn't as bad as I had worried, at 115 fasting.  Between the pain stress, lack of good sleep, and veggies last night, I had some worries that it would be higher.  Very surprised it isn't as high as it has been the last few days.  I'll take it, gladly, if I hope it improves back to where it was for... a goodly? or short? while?

Parent.

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Child.

Wretching.

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Nearly.  Woke in such pain I almost threw up.  Had to get out of bed.  Wrap up for warmth and some comfort, or attempt at it.

Torture.  I won't let a doctor touch that leg ever again.  Not without anesthetizing it.  I wonder if they found out I am a double breed.  Perhaps that is a group that is still allowed to be hated?  Even a dog would be given something for the pain.  Well, that or they read here and are serious groid lovers.  I could see that too.  I wonder how they would feel about them if they had been raised by a hateful alcoholic abusive one of them?  Yea, they know nothing.  When it comes for them, we'll see how long they stay liberal.

Oh... that leg.  Wow.  Imagine you have a wound, and someone takes a steel brush and a drill to it.  Right.  Look with the eyes, keep the hands in the back pockets.  If I wanted torture, I'd become a pow.  No, no I think not.

Another thing to consider... of concern.

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Even if my cheat was more into the keto territory, I worried that maybe the carrots had increased blood sugar.  Here, as I get ready for bed, and took the last antibiotic for the day, I decided to check that.

Always something, right?  Still, even if it was up, it wouldn't be as bad as if I had stopped for a burrito, or beef roast sandwich, or had half a dozen donuts and a half gallon of milk.  Right.  Right?  As it turns out, this time, that is right.  At 109 it's... a bit higher than the last read.  But, for having eaten an extra meal in the day, besides the veggie tray, it's not bad.

OMG that hurt.

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I did get in to see the doctor.  Pretty quick, all told.  There was someone else there, a family.  Non-English speaking.  But, that was it.  I was a bit surprised.  I suppose people have completely backed out of seeing doctors.  Often, like even me, stalling these things.  Just... don't trust doctors anymore.

After today, I'm more certain I don't trust doctors.