It was a thought.

.
.
There for a bit I almost thought I could get to town. Time passed and nothing happened. Getting up to feed the cats a couple times (I feed them half their feed, wait an half hour, then give them the rest in the hopes that Sam won't barf) I found myself completely exhausted and winded. After that let up, I did call the clinic. I want something to ease the breathing, some kind of medical prognosis, or... something. All I connected with was a message service though. I will be surprised if I hear anything back any time soon. No other calls have been returned, from any of a number of people, lately.

If I get to any kind of function, and can concentrate, I am hoping to do the laundry and dishes this weekend. If I was often tired before, I am constantly tired and distracted now. I can't seem to make heads or tails out of anything, and initiative ends with little done save sucking in air for a half hour and a deeper misunderstanding of my environs. If it only gets worse from here, it might not be bad. I will be back to Nothingsville. I won't see it coming.

I keep seeing stories about how people are, statistics about this and that, and I see the shallowness most people posses. Of course, I have to wonder if shallow is the right word, or empty fits better in many cases. Is it that people want to do something or be with someone in order to become something they aren't even sure they would really want to be or is it that they just follow some people without ever thinking about it? How much of the population simply surrenders? How many just go along with whatever? What is the critical number where concerned, principled, thinkers are so overwhelmed that they are first side-lined and then actively hunted? Questions indeed.

On the good side, should I be of the latter type, if the critical number has been exceeded, and if marginalization have already occurred and the hunt is now on... For me it will be a short hunt. A defended position will always fail, but it beats failing AND being out of breath in the open! See, I can be an optimist!

Good day.