Whatever works.

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My morning was a morning of whiplash, too tired to stay awake so constantly fighting constant nodding off and yet having lungs too full, chest fullness pain, and some other stuff to sleep. After four or six hours of that I finally surrendered and tried to sleep again. It took a good bit to find a comfortable position. Actually, I never found one. Instead, sleep found me, surrounded me. Four more hours of sleep saw me up and somewhat rested.

Why my lungs are full now but not later, when they fill and how? None of my business I guess. All I know is that I am at best able to sit without panting, at worst I am panting, unable to sleep, needing sleep, and unable to find any comfort. What I take in the way of medication has zero effect, other than adding side effects. Is the medical field completely incompetent, is my body just too different, or... what? I will say that having quit everything but the Flinstones chewable, my life is much more comfortable. I was drowning in a dozen minor but quite annoying side effects on top of not finding one ounce of relief. As is, all I have to deal with is my breathing problems. While that is bad enough, adding in side effects is like being beaten by a main attacker while being kicked and pinched by his girlfriend.

Another oddity is that, since I ran out of long cut snuff I have taken to smoking my pipe. I usually keep a bag or two of various smoke around, just for such situations. While I feared smoking would aggravate my breathing problems, between my inability to get my butt in gear and my addiction, the pipe has become a regular use item. As I said, my breathing is not at all bothered. The only change I can tell is that my coughing, which had become progressively worse and worsened my breathing from time to time, has vanished. When I make it into town, beside picking up some replacement pipe tobacco, I will be buying leaf chewing tobacco. I think with my dehydration, the grains of even long cut snuff aggravate my throat by drying into place along the throat and becoming an constant irritant. Just plain odd.

Feeling better after the nap, if still having problems, I have opened the windows, set dishes to soak, started a bit of picking up, and will be doing a few tasks that need attention. I don't know how far I can get. Pushing past the exhaustion doesn't get me anything but trouble. If I can just find a very slow pace that is sustainable to some point I might actually get some things done. I am considering tools that might help me. For laundry, for example, a cart to pull the laundry baskets rather than bending, lifting, carrying, setting down. It seems like a minute difference, but every ounce of effort has to be considered. I am so used to, when I do something, just full force doing it, that this is taking some adjustment. I hate it. I used to do four loads of laundry as fast as I could. My only problem with getting that all done at once was remembering to get to them.

If I can get a load of dishes done, collect recyclables, and see one load of laundry through, I may try to bribe myself into town with the promise of an easy meal. I need a bit of tobacco, a little milk, perhaps some bread, and apples, oranges, and pears would be good. I may become a member of Sam's Club online this weekend. I keep... thinking that over. One advantage to them is, I could order online and pick up the order the next day. All I would have to do is back up my vehicle to the loading area and drive home with enough for a couple of weeks of eating. And all of that food would last should my lack of ability to eat, cook, and clean remain in effect. Further, adding to that slightly over time would be quite simple. Perhaps this is not the best or cheapest way to load up on a couple of months worth of food, but at this time, in my condition, it is probably as good as it gets.

Of course, something else that might be helping is warmer weather. I honestly don't think the doctors have a clue as to what is really wrong. They see the high blood pressure and stop thinking perhaps. Much as they used to see a mental health diagnosis and then quit looking for any health issues. Apparently either those with a diagnosis are not capable of physical ailments or those ailments are secondary to psychology no matter what or someone with a psychiatric diagnosis can only be healed by liver damaging psychotropics or people with a mental health issue (real or not) are not worth treating. I know some of you actually believe in psychological and psychiatric voodoo, I don't. I am having difficulty finding validity in standard medicine. I think they not only could, but would, diagnose a cat with depression, if they thought it was as lucrative. Wait... don't they?

Have a good day. Later.