Not bad.

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I wasn't sure how Thanksgiving, and today, would go. I am in a serious slump. Yesterday didn't require me to be awake early, but even then I had to push to make it. I was an half hour late but... that was almost built in. Today I was required to be up and out at a relatively early hour, before 10:00. On each day I had to shower and the rest, do my routines, and skip waking up. I won't say it wasn't rough. I will just say I surprised myself. I was more worried about today as I had offered to be one of the drivers. I had put myself on point.

I am barely able to walk these last few days. Burned out, I suppose. Perhaps the cold has settled on me and winter is taking it's toll. I simply don't know. Yesterday was rather short in duration. Today was from 10:00 to 20:00, as it turns out. I was also worried, today, about money. I wasn't sure I had enough gas or money for more, and then I worried about any additional fees. As it turns out I had enough for gas and there were no extra fees. I was a little worried about whether I could hold up. I did well enough if I certainly wasn't on the top of my game. So be it. I shifted right through from the first to the third order knight. I can't wait to get going on some projects.

The first project will be meeting with our priest to discuss a men's breakfast before Mass. I have been given no limits or guidelines. It is my baby. I know trying it every Sunday would be too much, twice a month might even be pushing it (if it is what I would prefer). The menu is something else to be sorted out, if I have some ideas I will listen to Father and speak with some of the other men. After that? I will have to wait until our meeting mid-month. I know I would like to create a monthly prayer vigil regarding abortion, and find out what we are doing about collecting money to help cover costs for women who we reach, to help pay bills incurred for the birth process, housing, and whatever costs for understanding the importance of life. The Lord knows, getting a woman to cherish life is not without a real world price. While we can't give her back that time, we can make that time be as painless as possible. In a way, we must become, stand in for, the fathers of those children. Now THAT is real shared sacrifice. I think the other issue, which sort of brought me to enjoying cooking and feeding people, is hunger. I really would love to see wrongful hunger and definitely starvation end. If there is one thing I could do, and believe is practically possible, it is that. I would love to see no one ever have to worry about food. Not here, not in Africa, not in Pakistan. Big words for a little big man, but there it is.

I was able to get to know my leader a bit better. I couldn't remember, but he is one of the men who helped me move in. He looks younger, somehow. And I told him so. No need for flattery when the truth will suffice. I also got to speak with some of the men who road with me. Yes, fellowship, something I have sorely missed. While that isn't a main part of joining, it is a part of it. Good men, all married and working, so, again, I am an outlier. And yet, not. They seem to have softened a bit. I don't understand anything, truth be told. I can only speculate when I write here about some things. Perhaps, as I thought, they had heard bad things about me. Perhaps they were just tired that day. It is difficult to know. I assess, then write, speculate, then write, but I may never really know.

Because of business, medical appointments, and some other things, I have been unable to attend Mass this week. I hope to attend Saturday and twice Sunday. I don't know if I can get that to happen but it is the goal. I have no other real goals, though I hope to catch back up on dishes, and then roast a leg of lamb. Nummm! Love that stuff, at least if it isn't too hard tasting. I am looking for a brand of lamb I can more than merely tolerate. I miss what Albertsons used to have available. When they sold out, we lost that line, a simply exquisite line of lamb. It cost a bit more but was worth twice the costs for the flavor.

Good night.