Another day in the...

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Wait, no it's not.  This is Friday, the third installation in the Doom begins getting fit saga.  And I do believe it will happen.  But... how?  Three days of even getting to town, in a week, just by itself, until literally this week, has left me too tired to even blog.  Even that summer that I did well, I don't think I could have gotten to town like this.  But throwing in an half hour in the pool really putting some effort in?  Of course, it is only three times, assuming I make it to town and swim.  And I have been taking it somewhat easy on the off days.  No, that isn't quite true.  Even my off days have seen more things done than some previous 'on' days, even minor good weeks haven't seen as much done as my off days.  My thinking is relatively clear, memory is pretty good.  Sure, some housekeeping is slipping, if I think I can get to that this weekend.  I have even been sleeping and waking well.  The last two days have been seeing me sleep ten hours, but that is built into the system, at the moment, as the outside limit.  And it has been holding.

Never mind why, I'll take it for now.  My blood pressure is down one day, up the next.  The highs are running into the 140s-160s/100s-110s, but the lows (the majority of readings) have been 100s-110s/70s-90s.  Something is simply shifting.  I may still call in and see if they want to see me sooner than planned.  At this point, being this close, actually seeing it, I may tempt fate and try one more very tiny dose of something or other.  I am terribly nervous about touching ANYTHING.  But to cross over that last little patch, and get the bp fully controlled, I think, would be an absolute break in healing.  Of course, then I will have to begin hitting diabetes.  One thing at a time, remember?  It's all I can do.  But I am doing it, with some help.  At least, now, I don't feel like they were just goofing with me.  Mostly.

My weight is staying in the 280 range, and it bugs me a bit.  I still have to add that I am wearing 38-39 waist pants easily, if 36s aren't quite on the horizon... yet.  When I came here I was 300 and wearing 44 going on 46 waists in my pants.  My 44s then fit tighter than my 38s now.  While the weight itself is frustrating, the loss in waist size really does make a difference.  I HAVE to have been gaining muscle.  It doesn't take much muscle mass to replace the weight of fat, so it probably isn't all that noticeable?  Crazy though, I suppose just being more active, even a bit more each day?  But that's crazy talk, unless I add muscle as easily as those women who seemingly look at chocolate and gain a pound to their hips gain fat?  I simply don't know.  Like I said though, my arms are rocking-up from those two days of swimming so far.  Even my chest is tightening a goodly bit, if there is still a bit of... man-boob there.  :p  Yeah, maybe I do rock out fast.  It's almost spooky.  Wait until the doc lets me hit the iron, and then I can get to it!

I don't understand.  At times even I was beginning think my stories of benching 550 and swimming 9m a week were... maybe... fable.  Whole cloth or stretches, I... can't remember save that those things were stored in memory as truth, at one time.  And I remember being at the gym and in the pool.  I am not so sure now.  Especially since, last time I swam I was able to do a mile in an hour swimming and bench 300, but 3 miles in an hour, 550 pounds bench?  If I can ever get to swimming even 1 1/2-2 miles in an hour, and benching even 400, at my age and infirmity, I will be more sure.  Time will tell.

Time to wake up.  Have a great day!