Going through a spot.

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Yeah, the battle cry has been to bring on the pain.  And I have done so.  Like trying to get a vehicle out of a rut, it's been a lot of back and forth.  Sure, I have been at least moving most of the time for a good long time now.  And there has been success, and mostly success.  Thing is, I am still in the rut.  Unlike the analogy, being in a better position, even if not escaping the rut, is a good thing.  I am definitely in a better position.  But it's such a tenuous thing.

While I have hit my goals fairly well, I am still quite behind in the real world game.  What I have been doing is slim.  Most of you reading this can do in a few days what took me a couple of weeks.  Heck, what I have done is what some of you do while holding a job.  Then, on top of that, you head out on weekends to play or party or garden.  Just to add perspective.  If I have done anything, it is to have worked up to a place where I might be able, just now if that, to begin pushing to add stamina and strength.  Two, maybe three months, of pushing as hard as I can, just to get into a position to begin making my advances more, if only potentially even so, permanent.  Ugh.

Lungs are still a bit wheezy, just from that effort.  I'll have to dig so much deeper to actually add strength, all while trying to maintain my home, auto, boat, and life.  I hope the weekend gets me back into solid oxygenation, and cuts the pain in my stomach from pushing into coughing for air.  I am hoping my body relaxes and is again ready to push wherever I can fit a push.  I haven't checked my blood pressure... tomorrow morning.  I doubt if it will have improved though.  I did check weight, and that has remained the same.  It's a bit depressing that all the seeming effort hasn't done a thing.  No signs of improvement.  I can tell my body is tighter.  Muscles, structural integrity, if not something that will last without continued effort.  I know there are improvements, but they aren't showing up in any real measurable way.

I've done a few very minor tasks, eaten a meal, and will do another task or two today.  Strictly low level, low effort.  Even while I haven't improved, for the state I was in, I have pushed.  If you don't work out, it would be like adding five or six half hour periods of exercise into your life.  Only, I would guess, you would have improved more.  As I said, I am hoping I am up to the point where I can begin actually improving.  I had to shake off ages of rust just to get to this point.  I just hope I can keep it going.

I have the recycling pretty much ready for tomorrow, and with the bill paid I have no trouble putting things out... on the conscience level.  Trash is pretty ready to go, too.  I might put most of the trash on ready tonight, while I deal with the last bits of laundry, and wash the dishes in prep for a final soak, finishing those tomorrow.  I may also begin tearing down the living room tomorrow.  Just organizing and sifting lighter stuff, from time to time.  Monday is when the real teardown begins in the living room.  Taking out the chairs and everything mostly mobile, moving things that aren't as easy to manage onto one side of the room, vacuuming and steam vacuuming the open parts, then letting that dry.  I don't know if I will get all of that in one day, but it's possible.  Oh, and I need to hike, maybe hit the bench too.  Tuesday will be for picking up and around, finishing what I didn't get done, and a lighter day.  If I got one half of the living room done, then I may begin in on my bedroom... sorting, sifting, tossing, getting it ready to be evacuated so as to be vacuumed and steam cleaned.  I'll probably move into the guest bedroom while that goes forth.

Yeah, I think I'll get it done this time.  I have three more areas after the bedroom.  I'll hit every other day hard, doing lighter days in between, with weekends off.  Add in the hope to do something outdoors, or on the weights, on the heavy days.  I am hoping to get the kayak on the water Wednesday, but I won't promise on that.  I definitely have a life vest, a pair of anchors (if not the stick anchor yet), and... Hmm... I'll check to see about paddles.  I thought they came with the kit, but didn't find (or look for) them in that initial setup.  Gotta have paddles.  If not, I'll check with the seller.  Could always get an extra one anyway, whatever the case.

Yeah, no.  I'm not quitting.  I'm not giving up.  I'm just a bit flustered that nothing has, by measurement, changed.  I'll see more tomorrow, but I am betting, just as with weight, blood pressure is the same.  Not good.  At least it won't be in the 216/180 range.  Probably.  Gah!  Ecclesiastes 9, with a minor focus on 1-6, and 13-18.  Yeah, never mind, just be certain that all the wisdom I need on this is there.  And yet?  Balls!  No, no I don't expect you to get it.  Not yet.  ;)