Went down hard.

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I did get the dishes done, the laundry rolled over, medicine taken, and a few other last minute things on the way down.  By the time I was in bed, I was exhausted, week, had a solid case of vertigo plus the symptoms of a panic attack (without any panic though), plus the migraine.  I'm not sure which caused the slight feverishness... vertigo, migraine, or the other symptoms packet.  No painkillers.  When those start up, either I sleep through them or suffer them until they back down then take a handful of pain remover.  Brutal.  I turned both the fan and ac on, full bore.  This time I didn't use the shut-down timer for my ac.  I can, and do, use that at night.  It seems not to be the best plan if I am day sleeping, especially if the sun will be out.

I did set the alarm.  Beside having a reason, as I suggested before... when I can remember that I will do it.  With being underwater I need an external measure of time.  Both to try to more surely lock time into my inner spaces so I can work with it in a general, business, and personal way... but if failing some or all of that, so I can, in the moment, have some idea of how much I am sleeping.  I need to try for enough, but not too much.  A six hour sleep, here or there, is fine... if my body is working with it well, or I have something to do.  A twelve hour sleep is fine, once, after a major push.  Neither can be tolerated for long.  Seven to nine hours is my golden ratio.  Up time can vary... more.  I have less control of that, even now.  I, mostly, woke on the alarm.  A snooze or two, perhaps, I think.

I am a bit surprised.  Not too much pain as I wake.  I've already showered, put the clothes to a finish fluff run, set a pot of coffee to cook, and had a grapefruit to put something into my stomach.  A grapefruit isn't the best starter, especially alone, more so now that I am drinking my coffee black more and more, certainly today.  While I love cream, I may be moving to three gallons of milk, but more for a two week period.  Some for coffee, some for drinking.  It's not that I don't still love cream, I am simply trying to cut some things... excesses.  As I make efforts to work my body and mind, I am also trying to cut... down to the bone... pretty much on everything.  A minimal life.  Gearing up, working, organizing, pushing, eating, and drinking.  Frivolities and luxuries have to go away.  Not even using Splenda, or other sweeteners.  Oh, a treat now and again, but...  *snip, cut, pull, dump*  Tobacco... on the last roll, started the first coin of that today.  Patches should be in within the week.

Today?  Too late to hike.  I can check on the post office, get to town for some shopping later, finish the one load of laundry and start another, plus cook some food.  Grain goop first, eggs later in the night.  Enough eggs for my week, and one, maybe both, half gallon jugs of pickled eggs.  Which reminds me.  The eggs I pickled should be ready!  Ah, one of those will cut the grapefruit.  Though with vinegar as a backdrop, not sure if that will help.  Oh well.  I best put the mush on, then try a pickled egg.  Oh, and maybe take a minor dose of anacin.  Yeah.  Later.