Yeah, more eating.

.
.
Things are a little complicated currently.  Is it heating, weather change, not eating enough, sleeping, or a list of other things that are the problem?  I can't say.  I know sleep is off.  I know it is heating up, though the weather seems to change radically and quickly.  I know I am not able to eat as much as I probably should, though now that work has slowed... stopped... not sure... but I do need to eat more, enough to have something in me, probably, in order to work.  Medicine is on track, and I have been doing quite well with it.  I always miss, usually just a dose a week, but as last weekend, a day and an half can happen... even more of a miss.  Still, all in all, I am doing what I can on my part.  When it is difficult to be awake, to function, it is difficult to eat, for a number of reasons.

I made a solid meal hoping it will get the fire of mind and will to spread to the body.  The last of the mash... yes, I smell it first, as with the sprouts.  The last of the sprouts, which were the bean type as well.  I thawed hamburger patties yesterday, checked them too, then cooked those while I heated the mash.  Two of the patties, the grain mix, and what was left of the bean sprouts, a dab of butter, salt and pepper, a teaspoon of hot pepper flecks (only works in hot food, needs to steam activate or some such), and a cup of joe.  Nothing fancy, but it was delicious.  Hunger adds it's own special spice.  I munched one more of the three remaining patties, with just a touch of salt.  Now to digest it all.

I am having to negotiate on some things.  Like, to keep up on medicine, I take the morning medicine as I go to bed... otherwise I lose a day, half a day, or more, trying to base medicine on my wake/sleep cycle.  But I can't take the waterpills when I go to bed, useless or worse... disruptive to sleep... otherwise.  When I wake up, I take the night pills, but add the waterpill.  And I end up taking my shots at night (my morning).  Seems confusing, but it's simple when you learn to skip the psychic rope of need and figure things out.  Nothing is perfect, but... it's what I can do, for now.

I still plan on my list, plus some cooking when I get those things done, a shower and a trip to the post office and then to town.  I am hoping to push into the day well enough to head to town for groceries and a razor in time to be coming back while the post office is still open.  There might be some bigger packages there.  Bleh.  I... lost track of the USPS shippings as I lost track of life, a bit.

If I wake early enough tomorrow, I am hoping to hit the trail.  The whole run, if there is time, if I have the energy.  If I can do that, I am hoping to gear up to use the bigger pack, with fifty pounds in it... maybe more, for my next run.  Not useless weight, but, perhaps, a full gear for a longer hike.  My tent and hammock, plus et. al. should be in by then.  Yeah, I bastardized et. al., it's my way... hush!  And see if my camelbak bladder will fit the bergen's bladder container.  I'll probably take an extra, dry, canteen, to fill with filtered river water as well.  And a device to pull the water out so I don't have to be hunkered over like a moose getting a sip while I filter.  It might even be good, next time or soon, to set up my hammock and take a nap somewhere off but near the trail.  Might could even spend the night if I wear myself enough?  Maybe.

I won't think myself into action, I will more likely simply fall into it.  At least on some things.  Push until you can't, but be prepared for the fall?  Yeah, that's probably the idea.  I'd also like to get my rope gear together and tinker.  I doubt if I have enough strength to do much climbing.  But I might figure out some knots and techniques, I could learn my limits at this time, and maybe, just maybe, I might have a wee bit of fun, even if it is at my own expense.  I've got a lot of credit on that particular card.  Love to spend it too, when I remember.  That is one interest payment I don't mind adding to my life.  Or yours.  Yes, you.

Well... a bit of music, then some other tinkering, then to work?  That's the plan.  Oh, I did check.  Can't, from what I have read so far, roll your own cherry bombs or 150's even in Alaska.  But you can buy and use them.  Yeah, no.  I won't tinker.  I'll read the book, but I won't even bother with the chems.  Just not worth the hassle.  If I need noise it'll have to be storebought or barrel produced.  I can live with that.  Still, I'd like to know a bit more about the stuff.  Curiosity has it's limits, problems, and uses.

How about something other than music?  Coincidences?  Me, personally, I don't abide them.  There is no such thing.

No, I haven't verified a single one.  Though I believe the found father story to be true.  Pretty sure.  I have a basket full of those, just in this timeline and flesh.  And know of many more.  Through these, sometimes, you can see into the cracks of reality.  It isn't quite what it seems.