Blasted.

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After the last post I spun out and crashed.  Could not stay awake.  I am just waking back up.  I don't feel bad, didn't then.  Like a plane losing it's wings, only one way to go.  Sleep was good. Woke with wet lungs.  Perhaps I haven't been taking medicine as regularly as I though.  Massages will help.  The two together would be better.  I can tell a masseuse can hurt with her hands, just as I could heal.  Not as likely, it's just to have what it takes for one, you can see to the other.

Whatever is happening with youtube, thus google, is bad.  Expect getting shut down, erased, at any moment.  It won't stop with them.  They are doing all sorts of things.  They are either in serious trouble, and flailing like a wounded beast, or they have been assured globalists are running the show, so they have no legal fears.  I think they are being set up to be left to the mob.  Get ready for the largest tech inversion in history.  Not just in America.  Though, as with global temp drops, you won't hear about it from elsewhere.  Governments are realizing they are also on the tech chopping block.  Not good with nuances, but governments are amazingly splendid at clay-fisted brutality.  Tech will lose.  Heck, you aren't being told how cold it is really getting.  I have heard from people in my old home it has hit into -65.  Not even rarely, at least several times.  I have been watching, never reported.  You are being told direct lies.

Ah, some changes.  I have a pushcart of metal, stainless.  While clean, functional, and such, it seemed rather industrial, sterile.  So I went with a more homey cart.  It just couldn't handle use.  With the wheels locked, I tried to roll it.  The rear wheels broke out, one of them breaking itself.  Okay, yeah, steel doesn't do that.  So, back to industrial.

I ordered two more, if that may be an extra.  I am thinking about dumping the microwave.  I am honestly not convinced they are truly food safe.  Perhaps for limited things, like softening or melting butter?   For now, I suppose, it stays.  I also purchased inexpensive cutting boards to bring the kitchen tools and appliances up to the rim.  I will have a cart for the stand mixer, dehydrator and food processor, then the microwave and grain mill, with room below for accessories and mason jars.  No other surfaces with access to plugs and height allowances.  Bleh.

Bit by bit I am figuring out how to make my world work as I wish it.  From tools, appliances, facilitation devices, to skills and some health leeway.  Even massages and pedicures are solely aimed at increased function.  Pleasure is so overrated.  If pleasure?  The only things that please, cause ease, are sleeping and resting.  Everything else actually hurts, to some level or other.  That isn't... what is sought either.  It is function, a fullness of life, obtaining what is as right and good as possible.  Ease is what is left behind, pain the price.  Worth it, I do believe.

I won't get to much.  A batch of sourdough pancakes, then dishes.  That'll be it.  Maybe back to bed.  Later.