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Before sleep, trash and recycling were gathered and taken to the bin. But not to the curb? No concentration. Then I made it to the post. I think the last packages were in, for a while. Couldn't have gotten out earlier anyway, or I would have. Something is terribly wrong. I don't get to die, sometimes I don't understand why I don't.
Pain. Dissociation... helps. Sometimes it is all I have. Now.
To bed by 23:00. I set the alarms for six and eight, then slept. An half hour down, pretty much asleep, then I realized it. The trash still needed to go to the curb. Did not want to wake. Had just escaped pain. Suspected I wouldn't be awake early enough to beat the recycling truck, maybe not even the trash truck. So, using every ounce of willpower to me I, I got up, dressed, then took the barrels to the curb.
On the good side? When I returned to bed I went to sleep so fast I don't remember from about at the curb. Out of curiosity I checked the bins. Full. And, yet, if I hadn't gotten them out? You know it. No whine, we have excellent services, just a cosmic pseudo law of action, inaction, and consequences. A God level joke, if one He neither devised, implemented, or such, but comes from our recalcitrance in His ordered world. I actually think He will enjoy the joke when it is fully explained to Him? I do.
Overcast. But not all that cool. It was about 56 around six, now 58? At almost eight. While the thermometers indicate 71 main, 68 secondary, home temperatures, I still need to wear long leg sweat typy pj's. I may add a fleece jacket. I do still have fans running, but in nooks to bring the last of the morning cool in. Fresh air is wonderful.
Blood sugar is 189 fasting. Oh well. I ate less than 1,200 calories yesterday, all keto. No food until 14:00. Chicken hindquarters and a pork roast are thawed, will be grilled. A fatted coffee or tea. Hmm, there has to be something else. I haven't had corn in a while, that would work. A rare treat. I am still hoping to work today. Later.
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