So very hungry.

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Strange.  I am rarely hungry these days.  Mostly I just get a sense that I should eat, or I want to eat.  I very rarely actually have a physical hunger.  Especially since I have been cutting sweeteners, carbs, and such.  Even keto sweeteners.  Blood sugar remains higher than I like, at 175 fasting, and 165 just now.  Probably too soon after my meal, but... yea.  I'll check in a few hours, not have anything between.

Kefir, a good load of it, earlier.  About three cups.  Then a coffee, but with cream but no sweetener.  Then three burgers, two with a slice of swiss and munster cheese.  One of each for two of the burgers.  No carbs in those cheeses, I check.  So, no carbs, whatsover, today.  And few yesterday.  Two drinks with only three drops of sweetener per.

I am eating correctly.  It just doesn't seem to matter.  Though, well below two hundred.  I guess there is that.  And, it is, slowly, roughly, going down.

Still, why hungry?  I just can't be sure.  As mentioned, I fried burgers.  Had to clean the griddle.  And cleaned it up after.  Plus put the lid on.  I've been leaving it open, lately.  Will now clean it before or after, maybe both, every cooking episode.  Though, really?  It... stays pretty clean for a very long time.  Though, when it goes stale, it... sucks.  Then you have to hit it hard.  No cooking on it for a goodly half hour, as I clean, oil, clean again, cure with oil again, maybe twice.  THEN can cook.

Though, I must say, being able to cook outside is great.  Now, to clean the kitchen, to the bone... surfaces, counters, inside and out.  And, get rid of a lot of things.  Glass I don't use.  Perhaps plates, since I have gone to paper plates.  Other things I just don't, or never, used.  Clean, stored better, set up.  Winter?  Not sure.  I could clear out the closest outbuilding, put it in there?  Don't know, thinking on it.  I just don't want to cook in the house, though cooking in the outdoors, raw, can be a bit much, even for me.  But, too, getting the griddle hot enough might be a serious trick, too.  Without at least four walls and a roof, cooking in winter is tricky.

I thought about calling my mother.  But last time I called, she only talked for two minutes, then found a reason to hang up.  I... won't call her.  If she wants to talk, I'll wait until she calls.  Just the way of it.  I won't put out effort if it isn't welcome.  Brother just seems to want to argue.  I'm not interested.  I'm not sure, but that may be how their family works.  Just not my gig.

Hmm... another coffee?  More gaming?  A call to Home Depot later.  They are sending one package of charcoals, but owe three.  Not sure what they are about, but either they will have to get the products I ordered here, or reimburse what they aren't sending.

This month I have, I think, mostly, paid my monthly shopping card off, before ordering.  Then after.  Won't be using it for actual credit, from now on.  So I am never really... behind?  Sort of.  That way, if something comes up?  I can either not spend any money through that, or pay just the minimum for a single month.  Trying to figure some things out.

I might even cut even more, and pay double on my mortgage.  Paying extra as is, but would like to nearly double the extra payment.  Cut the debt length even further.  Last I checked, doubling would cut the payment to, say, seven years?  But that was nearly a year ago.  And, before I had started adding a bit more than half of what was usually due.

Not only would, say, a six year payoff be good.  I'd be used to living on less, and have that money then go into savings... for eventually a lot of work on the house.  Double mortgages, even loans on equity, are horrible.  Traps, on top of else.  Even when debt was 3~4%.  Now?  No way.  But, a couple of years of savings, of around $1200 a month... say three years?  ...$43,200.  Enough chunk change to... do some work.  Assuming I can't figure out how to sell the house, rightly, between now and then.  It's supposed to be worth $350k or so.  But... that's... not how it's being offered.  Of course, if I clean it up, and update it?  I won't sell it.  Bleh.  Choices, on their side, and mine.  Hmm... may have to contact the guy I bought it through.  See what they might be able to do.  Even contacts about getting it cleand out, up.  They might have resources.  For the right costs and prices, and givens... yea.

Though, I am trying to get someone else to help out.  Though, not sure he is all that into it.  The numbers are good enough, but there is risk.  Repayment would be based on sell price, with a decent to very good payoff.  A base sell, the minimum payoff would be $15k.  Top notch, if I could get the quoted price?  I'd offer $35k.  If he won't or can't, I need to know that and start looking at other options.  Ugh.

Later.