What a storm.

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We must be having monsoon season, or a portion of it, early.  The thunder was right over my home.  The rattle of the things went right into me, as if near railroad tracks as a train goes by.  And the lightning was visible as the sound was happening.  There was no delay, not even from above.  Wow.

Went through that for a good several hours.  While offering torrential rains.  It was absolutely amazing to experience.  Though, I must admit, I kept expecting electricity to go off.  Or the internet.  Or both.  Though, if electricity is gone, how would one know if the internet was up?  And, it might need local electricity, even if it technically didn't go down?  Dunno, but possible.

I did have a few cans of kippers.  Though I realized, you won't eat your way out of starvation with sardines.  There are only 140 calories in a can of the stuff.  So two cans is only 280 calories.  And at 16 grams of protein per can, it would take ten cans to get the protein recommended.  If that would be too many calories.  Ugh.

I need to do a workup, to get a rough idea of what I need to be eating in a day.  For calorie density to begin to lose weight... and for protein profiles, for various day menus at the optimal caloric intake, in order to get the 150 grams or protein they want a day.

I thought about protein supplements, but those don't work so well.  Even if the label suggests 18 grams of protein per dose, or bar, or else, what is actually absorbed is very different.  Though... I did look that up once.  I know that collagen (if I'm using that for collagen, not protein) powder... only 15% of the protein in that is absorbed.  Hmm... yes... to find a protein cheat.  I need more.  And more fat too.  But I am NOT going to eat raw fat.  Period.  Not even sure they are serious, but maybe.  Just, I won't go there.  But there has to be a way?

I simply can't get enough food in.  Even when I set carnivore, even keto, aside.  I am simply not hungry enough.  Did the two cans of kipper snacks fill me?  I... wasn't hungry when I started.  I never felt the need for satiation.  I simply ate two of them because... I should?

I'll pull meat out tonight.  Burger, and a steak.  Hopefully I can fry a few burgers, as patties, tomorrow.  Or crisp the steak without actually cooking it through.  Less well done is far easier for me to consume... burger or steak.  Pork, too, but I won't go there.  And, as mentioned, I may see if I can find wild caught (US) salmon.  To use as sashimi.  The trick is to get just enough.  I have capers and mini-dills, which will help with that.  But, too, I need lemon, or lime?  Yeah, at least until I can get the taste down.  But... it might be too expensive, at the moment.  Or simply unavailable.  I'll have to look.

How am I going to start eating more if I can't even really handle enough carbs.  But fat and protein are way out.  Yes, I need to look up how much of this and that it will take to reach the numbers.  I'm probably looking at 1.8k calories a day... to be rightly calorically light enough to lose, but dense enough to lose.  Up to, say, 2k calories.  With 150 grams of protein.  Right?  I think so.  That would mean 600 calories from protein?  That's crazy... but... is it?  That would leave 1.2k calories from fat?  Which is 133 to 155 grams of fat (from 1.8k to 2k calorie base).  Hmm, actually... that's... about right for ratios.

Now... how to get that much food through my mouth!  Hmm... that would be about 1.7 pounds of burger, give or take.  Or, about 1.3 pounds of ribeye, 3.3 pounds of (beef) liver(?crazy, right?), or 2.7 pounds of chicken hindquarters (boneless, so... more... by a lot).  Ugh.  How can people eat that much food!  And... this is if you are sedentary.  If you begin to work out, more.  

Further?  That is minimums, for this or that.  The truth is, recommended on carnivore, they more tend to suggest as many grams of protein as one weighs (or should?).  If by what I should weigh, that would be a guess... somewhere between 185 and 215?  If by weight, ~230.  Ugh.  That is a LOT of meat.

I don't know.  But... I am sort of gearing up to try to get toward that end of things.  Though, I'm telling you?  I know I can't eat that much meat in a day.  If I had to make a choice, I will probably add in fats, somehow.  Raw suet?  F' no!  Though, perhaps, if I could figure out how to crisp the suet, without it rendering away, sure?  I... love crispy fat bits.

I must admit, I am a bit horrified at the prospect.  Though, realizing that I have literally been starving myself to death?  That's crazy.  True?  I just... we'll see.  Numbers, plans, goals, else.  We'll see.  Later.