Slightly better.

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The painpills seem to have helped.  Far from in good shaped, though in better shape.  I am trying to do some gaming.  So difficult to focus though.  The gaming isn't for pleasure, it is to push memory, focus, and physical interactions.  As well, possibly, to take my mind off feeling so awful.  It just isn't working.

I can play for bits, but I can't do even minor mini-bosses, or at least sets of them as some things left require.  Certainly not messing with more serious bosses.  I am stuck, on my main, at a boss that I won't go beyond until I defeat.  It is required for some things needed.  While not needed to defeat the game, there are certain things which that 'toon needs, which requires beating that boss next.

I have been researching builds that might make that possible.  But I would have to be in better shape.  When nausea is present, jumping around, button spamming, and adrenalin just don't mix well.  As mentioned, even easier (though nothing in this game is truly easy, and even "yard trash" (typical monsters) can kill you if focus isn't maintained.  Easily, or easily enough.

I can't believe I feel so rough.  Well, though... the last two weeks I have ordered milk.  Two gallons each week.  And drinking most of it pretty quickly.  My blood sugar is probably nearing catastrophic heights, at least compared to, say, the last year?  That might be it.

No more milk.  I drank the supply already.  Just... wanted... something something.  And, that was it.  Though, too, I think the air is a bit rough in here.  I need to open up, just a bit, and air it out, for short spots of time.  If that helps, I may have to figure out how to air the place out more often.  I opened the window in the bathroom, and... will see if that does any good.

Just for a bit.  If it seems to help, I may open just one window, upstairs, just a crack, while I sleep.  Hopefully it won't be too cold.  I've got to try things.  This... isn't good.  If quitting milk, getting fresh air, and eating better doesn't help, then it's... just a problem that simply has to be suffered.  I will try to set things to a better arrangement though.  And, if those things don't work, I may try other things.  Perhaps walks?  Short ones.  Off somewhere, safe from automobiles.  The cold, when I am rightly dressed, after a shower, and with hot drinks in a thermos of some sort, make the cold trivial.  Almost any level of it, for the times I would choose to be out, for the length I would choose to be out... that being during daylight hours, so probably no more than four to six hours, if more likely at max a two hour hike and as likely an half hour to hour to start.

Hmm, I ought to get a pack set up.  With mres (only for emergency food), a minor sleeping gear setup... tent or bivouac, blanket, and maybe a few such things.  Not a full kit, just... enough to handle three days at full food, or a week or two on reduced rations.  Firestarter options, lighting of various sources, extra socks or two, and sleeping gear... which would just be alternative base layers.  Sounds like a lot, but I could probably do that at under twenty pounds?  Or so.  Oh, and we can conceal carry in state, and open carry.  Mostly just to sound off, if I get in trouble.  Haven't heard of mountain lion or black bear attacks, but those aren't completely out of the question either.  And, hereabouts, I haven't seen much in the way of foul two-legged, but nothing can every be absolutely ruled out.

Yes, I have mres, though not many these days.  Just a dozen or two.  Well, and canned foods.  Not great, but would do.  Oh, and as cold as it gets, other foods would last well.  If refrigeration or even freezing is okay for the food, that... might work.  Lettuce would last well, probably if it could be kept from freezing too harshly.  Butter would last well.  And such.  Depends on the day, and where in the pack or in a jacket, coat, or even cargo snow pants.

Should I consider such?  Sure.  I don't freeze easily.  And have kit that can easily manage most of what is around here.  I have slept out, in the winter, before.  Hmm, could see how well I can do, by setting up my hammock out there, with the under and over quilts.  The overquilt also works well with regular sleeping bags, to add a lot of warmth.  I have some which, alone, are supposed to be good to 0 and 40, of each.  So doubling up, and with my 0, 20, and 40 degree bags, can seriously add warmth.

Something I never did get, but keep thinking on, is a snow sled.  That would be far better than a pack, if I wanted to take extra food and gear.  Or have my snow shoes and/or eventually add a set of cross-country skies and/or downhill skis, or several types of cross-country skis... so that trailblazing and easier runs/deeper runs might be possible?  Unlikely, but... the sled would really open up a lot more gear options.

Maybe all fantasy.  Heck, I'm half dying.  Though... maybe... fresh air would be what saves me?  Bleh.

So ill, so green about the gills, yet so hopeful.  I won't quit until I am dead... again.  *rictus grins*  Or... dead, again, and... remaining that way.  Though, really?  I don't think that is the end.  If what I saw was real, and I think it was, death is far from the end.  If I can't camp in the winter before I die, I'll... get to it after I die.  The risks won't be the same, but it's... not always about the risks.  Even now I seek means of mitigating the risk, not increasing it, right?

Well... on to... something.  Have a great Sunday?  Is... it Sunday?  Monday?  Sunday.  Ugh.  I was starting to wonder.  couldn't be sure if it was Saturday, Sunday, Monday, or... if I had clean forgotten several days in there.  Later.