Weird life lately.

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No, it's great.  I seem pushed, but don't have the sense of being pushed.  Little things are improving.  The care of my home, little cleaning projects, keeping up on dishes.  My schedule is slanting all over the place as I get carried into groups of projects and pastimes and can't seem to back off and remember bedtime.  Just today, I washed the dishes, so that I could make a meal.  Then I made the meal.  Not a bit dish day, but that is unusual.  What is more?  I washed those dishes, and stored the extra, as soon as lunch was eaten.  Smaller meals makes it easier to get to things right away.  But just the notion of those sets of actions, in real time, on one day, is... good.

My friend asked me to get to town today, so I will.  I'm a bit late, but that isn't too unusual.  I best get going though.  I'll see about a flash drive or two and some groceries.  I had to cut my sleep pretty short to be up to be in even so.  Though running late is pretty common around here.  It always will be, unless my heart is cured outright.  Beside the lack of focus, I think time is somewhat metered off the heart by the mind.  If that isn't the only way a bad heart messes up scheduling.  Well... I best be off.

Still... I'm almost beginning to live a dream.  I'll be picking up some stuff just for bath tubs, and more Lime-Away.  I've almost got the bathtub beat.  Once that is as clean as I can get it, I hope to do a few touchups with other similar sinks.  It's a small thing, it just isn't going to be stopping there.  Eventually I might actually get my home the way I like it, mostly.  It's easier to start from clean that to work up to it.  I just can't believe how many side, small, and main things I am doing a day.  I still need lots of breaks, but I take those then seamlessly get back to other projects, or hit the main project again, or make a meal and clean up, and such.  I have honest never done this good before, since becoming ill.  Very nice.

Bits of this and that.

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I'm messing with the camera again, watched a half dozen episodes of Supernatural, hit the bathtub, earlier, with two more various cleaners.  Oh, and I washed, rinsed, and dried the few dirty dishes before hitting the tub.  The tub is coming along, but dang is that thing soaking up some energy.  Closer and closer to clean, now a frosty soft white.  Mostly it looks like layers of dust.  Once I get it clean, I am hoping keep it clean won't be such a fuss.  After doing the dishes I cooked quinoa while steaming fish.  This time, unlike when I made rice recently, I remembered my new containers and pulled one out to store the extra quinoa. 

I am hoping to get back to the living room before long.  For now I am keeping up on things, so the cave isn't caving back in on me.  I do need to get the syrup spot off the carpet first, well and move and arrange things a bit for an easier time when I finally do get the steam vacuum out.  While I am not there, I do many things each day.  When I used to suggest that I got a shower, and maybe dishes done... or did laundry and made coffee?  Yeah, that wasn't a bit of what I did.  Often, that was all that I got done.  I am literally doing, in days, what I did for months earlier this summer. 

I'm not sure about getting out, not right now.  Learning and configuring this camera is beating me up.  The shows, give or take, aren't eating me.  They are simply diversions while I relax after working or thinking too much.  If I have an addiction at the moment, it is the camera.  Bit by bit, it gets arranged, and understood as much as possible.  There is much to go, but not as much as I had thought.  What I really need to do is to see a full explanation of what the various panels show while, or when getting ready, to shoot.  Where is the iso shown, shutter speed, and the rest.  How is it shown.  Some of it, as shown, makes no sense without knowing what it is supposed to say.  It's probably just like most dslrs out there, but it's just been too long since I used one.  Well, and I had only worked up slightly beyond the beginner stage of use.  I could take decent simple pictures with it, nothing more.

My mother called today.  Her Christmas present is in.  A better winter coat.  It fits precisely, and is pleasing.  I hoped it wasn't too warm, but I think it fits the bill.  Color, style, fit... perfect.  I hope.  If she hated the thing, I don't think she would tell me.  It is just like the one I got, but form fit to a woman, and with a girly color.  Dames love those... weird colors.  I do hope she enjoys it, but more that it keeps her warm.  It's warmer, so far, out here.  But where she is, they are getting hard, deep, brutal, cold.  I haven't even had a real chance to break out my new winter coat this year!  Bleh.  Maybe I missed a cold day, or spell, but I can only go by my experience.  Always nice to hear when a gift arrives.  One less thought, or worry, or whatever.

Well... today?  I'll be staying up as long as I can.  Probably just a bit more tinkering on the camera, another three or four episodes, perhaps the last of the quinoa, with butter, salt, and pepper... I remind you, quinoa has full proteins, like meat.  While it isn't filling in the same way, it isn't as lame as rice or some other vegetarian or grain things.  Just a tad bland, even when sorted with butter and the rest.  Ah!  Not enough fat, or fat natural to it.  Butter helps, but doesn't quite fix the dull.  I am hoping, after a sleep period, to get to town.  It'll be late, but I want to get a flash thumb drive so as to get the laptop going, then get photoshop going. 

It seems, with photography today, you have three choices.  You can become a simple photographer, using jpeg (only option in inexpensive cameras), you can be a fussy photographer and try to get your camera and settings just right even while using RAW format, or you can use RAW and do most of your fussing in post-production.  I would like to split between the last two.  The goal, for me, is to take optimal pictures in RAW, using post-production for when that fails.  Jpeg is fine, but post-production work is extremely limited.  You absolutely have to get pretty close or you won't get a photograph.  Choices, and I have chosen.

Ah, well, right.  On to another cup of coffee, the last few menu items for the menu "page" I am on, a few more episodes, then bedtime.  Not sure I will be back.  Enjoy your day, whatever else. 

Doing too much standing still.

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Not completely still.  I've been hitting the bathtub with everything but bombs.  Vinegar, first, which removed little.  Then Lime-Away, which removed more but certainly not all.  Finally I hit it with Pinesol, or such.  Letting each soak in for various amounts of times, then using both a nylon scrub brush and a sponge with nylon scrubbing backing.  It's better, not not pearly, or even fully clean.  I will wait until I take a shower, or two, before going to ammonia.  Mixing and matching that stuff just isn't good.  Ammonia, itself, is not perfectly safe, even cut.  I may just have to work on it over time.  But I did get a vast majority of the stains off the toilet.  I will swab and rinse that, with just soapy water then clean water, to get the chemicals off, before hitting that with ammonia.  The whole process will probably take a week to get to the use of ammonia, as I have other projects, and I want more than just rinsing, but time, to weaken any other chemical traces.  If that doesn't work, another week of clearing, then I try bleach.  Caution, boys and girls, when working with nasty chemicals.

I thought I was doing nothing.  With the slow progress in the bathroom and little else seemingly going forward.  As I review, however, I realize I am doing much more.  One of the big eaters of time has been tinkering with the new camera.  Between simply deciding which modes to use, reading the setup guides or watching them on YouTube, and just fiddling with the thing and components, it is eating a lot more time than I thought.  Further, I am having to learn so many terms just in photography.  Yeah, yeah, iso, cool.  But shutter speed, beyond the simple meaning and on into understanding function, aperture settings (and modes, and types), various focus routines... I still haven't gotten to setting the focus as I would like it.  Some of it is set up, now.  A few more menu screens to work through.

I finally realized that just watching some guy or gal fiddle with their camera in a video was not going to get me there.  I would have to read, do a basic setup, then tinker from there.  I think, once I have a better handle on where various controls are, then I can use the videos to fine-tune, check, and consider my settings.  This is eating bogus amounts of time, time I don't realize is flying by.  Further, I still need to create and save a reset image for the laptop, in case it fails.  Then install photoshop.  And finally, learn how to transfer images, and then use photoshop.  It is much more than I first considered.  Oh... and whether to copyright photos or not.  For now, I suppose, orphans are fine, for general matters.

Oh, and, I have been reviewing Supernatural.  I have the first eight seasons on bluray, and have been tumbling through those.  I have been keeping up on food, too.  So, yes, busy.  But most of it is busy on my butt, so it doesn't seem, to me, like I am doing anything.  I am probably running longer days, as to activity.  I am not sure if I am staying up more or less, but I am exhausted at the end of each "day".  That is messing me up just a bit.  Still... since I have nothing on the calendar for the moment, I suppose that is all good.  Eventually I will find a pace that is more suitable to a schedule.  If nothing else, I will simply burn out, lay down, and sleep for a few days.  Bleh.  I'll keep at things as I can.  Later.  Actually, probably good night-day.  Yeah... I pushed it, or did I fall short?  Gah!

Busy morning already.

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I wanted to cook breakfast, but thought I could do double duty.  Ended up being triple duty.  I have been reviewing information about how to remove stains from porcelain.  The mildest was first.  Vinegar.  I let that soak while thinking about breakfast.  I wanted to mildly season my cast pan and placket, so I started that process too.  After the vinegar had soaked, I rinsed it.  No luck on the base of the toilet, but it cleaned the bathtub a bit.  One layer of stuff anyway.  Next I've put Lime-Away on the stain.  I'll check that in a bit.  If that doesn't work, I'll try ammonia, cut to some percent if I think 10 to 1 is a bit steep as was recommended, more like 3 to 5 water to ammonia.  If those don't work, I'm not quite sure where to go.

I did get my cast back up to speed.  The skillet didn't really need it, but it's how I clean it anyway.  Peanut oil, lard, whatever.  The fat doesn't even have to be fresh, though it smells better if it is.  Heating, slowly, first a lower medium, than a lower high, then I let them cool.  I then scrape them, and redo as necessary.  Three different heat cycles, as I saw things, this time.  Then on to breakfast.  Eggs, ham, and potato crisps.  Nice.  I'll clean the pans out, again, shortly.  I use these often enough that I don't need to salt them.  I ought to work on my dutch oven though, and salt that and put it up.  Some other morning, when I have the right conditions.

I'll be tinkering on the bathroom throughout the day.  I'd like to get those spic and span.  It just feels better.  If I can remove the stain from the toilet base, keeping the bathroom clean, to my expectations, will be easier.  It just bugs me, having a stain.  Getting the bathtub cleaned will also be good for the mind.  It's just... something I like.  And, doing better as I am, I have time for it, and energy.  Heck, I'm working at a time of my day were usually I am just spending hours waking up.  Yeah, I like it.

It looks like I have a problem spot in the living room I had forgotten.  It has to be tended first.  I spilled maple syrup, and it has dried in.  I researched how to clean that, and think I can do it without too much trouble.  It's mostly just moistening the spot, but with care so as not to flood the carpet and backing, then, over a day, rubbing, scrubbing, and rinsing.  I figure I can prep the rest of the room for the steam vacuuming, while treating the spot, then have it ready to go tomorrow.  The steam vac will pick up any extra moisture that might have accumulated as well.  Sort of a back up plan to cover the corners. 

I just need a bit of time to digest breakfast.  I ate a bit too much.  Next time, just two eggs and two potato patties.  I am having to relearn to cook for daily daily, and then some.  Proportions are drastically different when you only eat a few times a week versus eating once or twice a day even.  Yeah, I'm working on it.  Whatever else, life is really improving.  I still have to negotiate, cover for weak points, mess with sleep or just put up with it as it is.  Life is returning to these bones, though.  That is certain.  Back to digesting breakfast.  Later.

Rather than fight a losing battle, a retreat was called.

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The last few days have been difficult.  Malaise, sleepiness, inefficiency... dragging butt, really.  I was doing everything I could.  Medicines, other than Monday I think, were on track.  I was eating at least a few bites a day.  I was sleeping reasonably well, if I seemed to be waking a bit early if that was only shaving an half hour to hour off my schedule, and that will little work so it wasn't exactly a stretch.  The engine and caboose of my train were fighting each other to no good ends.  I was becoming slightly worried that I might be in for a downturn.

Last night, though, way early for me compared to the last week and an half, I would guess, the opportunity to get to bed early occurred.  I took it.  I was in bed before 22:00, and probably asleep shortly after.  That would be like you going back to bed at noon?  Something like that.  Oh, and I slept well, if I woke rather early... close to 3:00.  Which makes sense, when you plug all the numbers into a spreadsheet.  Perhaps that took care of the building slight deficiency.  Or, maybe, my body just needed extra sleep for it's own reasons.  All I know is, since waking, life is good.  I feel ready to hit some things today, finally, again.  Some odds and ends, but mainly the living room, and testing the snow blower.  Odds and ends may end up being impressive.  No worries, I won't bother boring you with them today.  I might do a summary, later, or not.

Dreams.  A short one and a long one.

In the short one, the first one, I found myself in the kitchen, talking to my wife about shopping.  With three children, shopping trips were at least once a week.  Sometimes one, sometimes the other, and just sometimes a lunch date with both of us, having found a sitter.  Today was the latter.  We were going over our various checklists.  When shopping together, we would split the list by type and placement, meeting toward the front of the store.  I was faster moving, but she faster at finding, so it... worked out well enough.  A new tech arrived, where you could take virtual items you had on hand, in with you.  If they were ripening a bit slowly, you could even check the virtual version through a system, then manipulate the real with the data, and they would ripen more quickly.  The wife was not so in to new tech.  With herself, me, and three children... new ideas were just not fun.  Hand-holding through systems and processes, though, if they were simple enough, it what it took to get her on board... if she liked the results.  And if she decided she trusted the system.  Fair enough.  It wasn't a fancy dream, but it was real enough seeming.  No sex, no this, no that, just domestic... near bliss.  Good enough for this old dog.  I think that part of life... is just as much as any of it.  I enjoyed this dream a good deal.

In the next dream, I was an older woman, a widow of a wealthy man.  Somehow I got my nose bent out of shape about prisoners.  I decided to put my money, effort, and time into training prisoners for work, rather than have them sit around all day.  Or worse.  It took a great deal of advocating to various powerful men.  The governor, industrialists, even the prisoners themselves.  In time, it worked.  A minor arrow production system was created.  Myself, another woman, and a man, became the leads on the project.  All with similar goals and ideas.

Some parts of it were rather dangerous to work.  With the often poorly educated inmates, so those of us who were in charge decided to take those tasks on ourselves, after several inmates died in the process.  In time we became a force to be reckoned with, in the industry.  Wooden arrows, really.  For a dozen, or score, of years, we trained inmates in various skills, starting from the simplest, advancing them as they were able, on up to managerial tasks, accounting, mechanics, on down to simply being to work, on time.  It became quite a thing.  In time, hunters began using rifles more before, and new types of arrows were being produced.  Still, the program struggled on.

The three of us who created and ran the program were getting older.  None of us were young when we started, time does no favors.  With the change in hunting methods, and competition in the arrow field, the program was beginning to wind down.  Finally, when the other lady on the directors board, and dear friend in the dream, was killed doing one of the dangerous processes, the program finally came to a halt.  In some ways, I was very sad to see it go.  On another hand, it was time.  I suppose I had just hoped it would have ended on a different note.  I can't say the program helped a single inmate find his way to a new life, records were not kept.  But that was the hope, and opportunity for that had been created.

Strange dreams.  But that is the dream world.  And, nothing so strenuous that today isn't a good one, or at least it is starting out quite well.  Good day.

Old, new, why.

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Not even ammonia and day tripping can stop the bell.  She sings, I waltz.  That is neither new or old, it's just the way it works with men.

Work or play, or play work?

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I did get to bed earlier than usual, if for no good reason.  I didn't do a bit more work after packing and storing the bowls, glasses, and cups.  I was simply done.  I figured I'd need to rest a bit, sooner or later.  Last night, and the next few days, I suspect, are it.  Oh, I'll fiddle and all.  Focus is off, energy is down, and that is that.  Even so, I get more done than I often have in a week compared to this summer.  Even yesterday, I did an half dozen little things... a bit of sweeping, cleaning off a counter, this, that, and the other thing.  And food production is ongoing.  An extra meal a day when meals come in, and at least a meal a day otherwise.  Two meals is quite good, but even one a day is golden.  If I am not losing weight, I am solidifying, or... something.  Often, this summer, a whole weeks work was merely emptying my bladder on time.  Yes, I can do less if thankfully that doesn't lead to accidents.

The choices are slim today.  I would still like to tinker in the living room, at least prepping it for a heavier cleaning.  I would love to rake today, but I don't have that kind of energy and know it right now.  But, too, my camera did arrive today.  I have the batteries charged, one in the body, one on the handgrip and I have tested the latter to satisfaction.  I have run through some of the setup, adding time, date, and setting a few controls as I prefer them.  I have added the lens, tinkered with that just a bit.  Some of my tinkering has been from advice in the direction I mean to go, some of it has been from my own preferences after reviewing a lot of material.  I might tinker with it more today, or not.  While it seems like play, it is play work.  This is not a point and click.  I think it has an auto mode, and variations of it.  I am looking more for manual mode.  I have had a lower level amateur camera before, but not nearly this involved.  And that was some time ago.

Actually, my first photographs will be the Christmas lights, maybe tonight.  I will review some of the material I bookmarked, look through a guide I purchased, and either tonight or tomorrow I will be giving that a go.  I will need to install the RAW converter, probably to the laptop, before I can tinker with the images.  The camera, and all things about it, are much more complex than it seems on paper.  You just point and press a button, right?  From figuring out iso, white balance, and the rest, to setting up the tripod mount, then converting the images for just the right look.  Further, it's all subjective, to a degree.  The nice thing about this hobby?  Even if I can't get out, or up, or to projects, I can sit and take pictures from right where I sit.  As I said, I have been looking for hobbies that don't cost energy, time, travel.  But could also include those things.  Ta-da!  Is it better than gaming?  Could be.  Then again, some people can make a living off gaming, so...  Still, yeah... it's better than gaming.  It involves the real world, and involvement in it.

For now, however, after tinkering as I could, I will just rest and relax until I am ready to hit it some more.  Just a bit off, for some, or no, reason.  A shower shortly.  A bit of music in an attempt to kickstart the day...  I don't know.  It's a blah day, even with Christmas early.  Later.

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Can't stop tinkering.  But then, I keep thinking of things.  A few settings I remembered but haven't found come to mind, and so the camera comes out.  It's much easier to find controls and settings when guided, but I sort of like fumbling through and checking things out on the way.  Some I haven't figured out how to find yet, but I'll get there.  Then there are bits to add or setup.  Most recently, I realized I hadn't installed the memory cards.  Then to format those.  The last step mechanical thing to do is to install a screen shield.  I'll do that when I'm in a better mood or condition for fine motor control and fussing.  I could do that, and do it well, right now.  It is simply that it would be annoying to do right now.  I'm just not waking up well.  In hopes of waking up, and to attempt to push that along, I'll look over information on nighttime shooting, and landscapes, in the hopes of taking my first pictures tonight. 

Oh, and for some things, like the added battery grip, when you put that on or take it off, there are a number of little steps, beside just adding and removing, that you have to take.  There is a plastic piece that covers the battery body connector to the camera, and a rubber piece to place, depending on whether adding or removing the device, onto the various parts.  Minor details, but potentially very important ones.  It's quite the little device.  I must admit, it makes me nervous, just a bit, to fiddle with too much.  I'll get used to it before too long.  Finding that balance between babying it and taking things for granted leading to a drop is... just going to have to be figured out.  Just like a real baby, I suppose?  Even a real babe of various sorts.  Yumbleh.  Yeah, funny.

Strange.

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I think I will get my smaller work load done tonight, and early.  I loaded the containers, glasses, and mugs, preparing them first, into boxes.  Transported them to the basement and found a good place for them.  I did a couple of other smaller things, such as beginning to charge the batteries for the camera.  I have the socks and clothes in easy reach for finishing.  If I do that, I'll do a little bit of looking over the place just to get ready for anything tomorrow.  Then I may simply go to bed a bit earlier tonight.

The camera seems to be on some sort of delay.  I am not getting updates.  It was supposed to be in today.  I have no clue when to expect it, now.  They aren't saying if it was broken, lost, or if there was some other problem.  I would like to have that soon.  UPS has been very good to me.  One mishap in a hundred packages I can manage.  I just wish I had an idea of when it will arrive.  It is merely anticipation, though.  There is no huge race, or hurry, or need.  I have, or will have, everything else in by then.  I have a little box just for all camera related pieces and bits.  I should have my photo editor installed by the time I get the camera as well.  I actually have a minor project, a drywall repair, in mind for my first project walkthrough.  I am interested in taking pictures of my home, with the Christmas lights set up.  I want to get pictures of the girls.  I have asked my friend if he would mind being used for portrait practice.  And I have asked another group of people, tentatively, once I become more practiced, if they would mind me taking some snappy snappies for practice.  Then to edit those a bit and offer the data to whomever.

Tomorrow?  I really am hoping to sweep and vacuum, then prepare the living room for a steam treatment, or three.  That will pretty much be my whole day, I think.  If I finish that tomorrow, I will have to wait for that carpet to dry before figuring what else to do in the cave.  So, it would be a good time to begin tearing into the garage.  Moving stuff, "dusting" or whatever will pass for that out there, sweeping, than arranging this and that.  I didn't start the snow blower yet, so I may get that going, checking the oil first, adding some fresh gas, and perhaps just letting the machine burn through a tank.  Oh, and I suppose I could try to get the twigs burned.  I really don't want those sitting out there all winter.

After that, I am hoping to tear into my bedroom.  Remove everything.  Vacuum and steam vac, and probably just live out of the spare bedroom until that carpet is dry.  Moving some of that will be tricky.  It's not weight so much as fragility and size.  Moving a mountain isn't so much of a problem.  Moving a sand castle is.  I might even see if it needs a coat of paint, and consider that, while I am at it.  Hmm...  I might want to tear out the vanity in the en suit before I do that.  As I said, I plan to simply put heavy, lower hanging, shelving in to replace a vanity in the en suite.  So I will need to paint the bathroom as well, to cover where the old vanity, and mirror I will be removing as well, were.  But painting was on the menu anyway. 

Yes, it's all possible.  I have been keeping up, and doing extra.  Food, mostly, some days.  Sweeping after I drop something on the floor and just once in a while just because.  Keeping up on trash and recycling.  Staying on top of dishes and laundry.  And, as I said, doing more, sometimes much more.  This is good, very good.  I'm liking it.  It's like I've come back to life again, much as that first summer on medicine.  I bet it was lower dose, but I won't swear to it.  Perhaps I have simply burned out on the stuff.  Anyway...  This is about as optimal as I can make it.  Slow but really sure.  Later.

Oh...  I've been ordering fudge for Christmas.  I don't want to order even one more thing, though, this month.  But I really love walnut fudge.  So I looked up a couple of recipes.  I think I should be able to do that easily.  My double boiler, at present, is a chemical one, so I can't use it.  But I do have glass bowls and smaller pots that would work just fine.  The trick is, if you want really good stuff?  Start with quality ingredients.  Finding walnuts that aren't too acidic is going to be a trick, the chocolate shouldn't be too difficult.  Yeah, and it is much cheaper to make.  Well... if I watch it just a bit.  You could spend a fortune if you want some high-falutin' furrin chocolate.  Same with anything, I suppose.

Yeah, no to raking.

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I did finish the dishes, and tinkered on a few other things.  I didn't get to it all.  Then again, remember, yesterday I thought it nothing was going to happen.  And, of course, my ability to plan work is still a rough thing.  I feel a bit drained today, or at least this "morning".  I won't really make a plan today, other than hoping to finish those tasks from yesterday... pairing the socks, putting up the last bits of laundry, and packing and storing the glasses and containers, putting that or those boxes in the basement.  Yes, I did reset the timer on the Christmas lights. 

Sleep was oddball.  I woke several times, but never quite awake.  Enough oddity in that last that I might simply have dreamed that I was awake.  Dreams, I am sure, but no memory remains.  Vivid, is all I can recall.  As a term.  Much as if you normally live on apples and potatoes and someone slips a lemon in there, only visually based.  Vivid for certain.  Nothing fancy, I don't think, just... visually stunning.

A few days, actually, will be spent sort of down.  I would like to do little things each day, maybe a bigger project.  I am feeling a bit worn.  Weather might be changing.  Perhaps it is merely getting cooler.  It still feels more like fall than winter, and by the calendar... nah, it is probably winter now.  Something is going on.  Still, I am pretty sure I can at least do a few light tasks each day.  It is becoming more common for me to see a problem, project, or area to clean, and just do it.  It has been an amazing month, especially compared to the rest of the summer and fall.  I do believe it will carry through the winter.  With ups and downs, like today.  I am very pleased with my efforts though, recently.  I won't complain.

Later.

That was a fast recovery!

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While I thought "today" was going to be a wash, possibly a complete wash, I seem to have miscalculated.  I took "morning" medicines immediately, then started on a general slog for what I had proposed to be a dead day.  I decided to take care of trash, since I seemed up to it.  Which I did, and cleaned the litter boxes, while grabbing the recycling bag on my way.  Further, since the bin was a third full, I decided to take that to the curb.  When I returned, I swept the kitchen, if not all of it, put new bags in, and kept going.  I next washed the dishes and set them to a hot rinse.  Not thinking I was quite done, I grabbed a laundry basket and collected the socks.  That was enough, though I did set a steak to salt.  I salt those for an hour, to tenderize and come to room temperature before cooking.  It works, try it some time.  I set the timer for an hour.  But that was that.

Almost everything I thought I might get done "today" was done, in a flash.  I have since cooked my late dinner, eaten it, and am digesting for a while.  Oh, but the hot rinse had cooled, so I warmed that about halfway through my break.  If it is warm enough when I finish my break, I will move on to drying those, putting up the regular dishes and such, then wrapping and boxing the extra glasses and cups along with the glass containers, and taking that whole box downstairs for storage.  I wanted to hone a razor or two, again, with more information I have garnered through research, but I won't do that until I have my tabletop cleared again.  I might have that done yet tonight, if I am mostly through should I finish that.  I might yet put up some clothes, deal with the socks, and reset the laundry baskets, but probably no more and maybe not that.

I am still stumbling a bit.  I haven't quite gotten a good reading on what a reasonable set of work is, and that still varies from day to day.  But even just a few things, every day, and life is really smoothing out.  I am doing in days what I would do in a week, or even more sometimes this summer.  It's been a rough one.  I think my medicine change is exactly what I needed.  I will attempt to work it up, just a bit more, but that is all.  If it is too much, this time, I will just jack it back down.

The chances of me getting to some real work, and exercise, are much more real.  I still have a ways to go, but getting to things, getting up, getting out... all have been happening rather well.  I won't say it has been easy.  I still have to push, pull, and sweat.  I really am about as close to death's door as someone should be, even if passing through isn't a threat, getting to things is very difficult.  I am doing very well, but even these things are difficult.  Difficult I can handle, impossible... not so much, at least usually.  Oh, and I have been researching dozens of projects, the camera and some software, trying to figure out some security issues with machines, and so on.  Even my down time is productive, or at least more so.

I'll probably wish you good night/day now.  I'm getting tired.  If I do the work I have planned, and a bit more, I might not get back to post.  So, yes, good night/day.

Oh, another thought.  If it is reasonably warm tomorrow, I may actually get out and rake instead of other planned affairs.  Why?  I can't really say.  I'm not sure what the whole thing with raking is about, to be honest.  Perhaps to put a more public face on my new life, perhaps for social norms, perhaps just to be out in the air.  Yes, it will snow fairly soon.  Few will even know what I did, fewer still even of those who know will know why.  Late is the hour of the season.  But... just because I can, if I can, if I wake early enough that there is still enough light is the one caveat to the plans.  And, if I get to it, I might burn the branches.  I am told we can't burn leaves, so will just bag those.  But branches can burn, and if I do that first, I can keep an eye on that.  Yes, good night.

Woops.

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I missed medicine yesterday, all of it.  It feels like I ran into a door, brick wall?  I'll go with wall.  Definitely wall.  No give in it.  That sort of surprises me.  I'm on a much reduced dose, I wouldn't have thought I would notice.  Ah well, I'll pick up when I can.  Yes, yes, I am back on it.  Of course.  Oh, right, the trip to town, and first thing when I woke... sometimes that throws me off.

When dinner arrived tonight, my neighbor was surprised by the Christmas lights.  He thought, perhaps, another neighbor had helped.  *smile*  Always good to surprise.  More, possibly impress.  My busier schedule has been reverberating.  People notice, it seems.  Tonight won't be one of those good days.  No worries, though, I needed rest, knew I did, so... I'm going to get rest.  I will try to mess with the dishes, take the trash and recycling to the bins.  If the trash bin is even half full, I will take that to the curb.  Those two things are about it.

I would love to finish the socks, and put up what has been folded while fiddling with shorts and towels.  I would like to do more work to make my primary razor sharper.  And I would love to tinker in the living room, prep it for a steam vac.  But I don't think those things are possible.  I dropped pretty hard after hitting that wall.  I might be lucky to get anything done.

The neighbor knew of the timer, though, or well enough.  No need to read the, usually, useless directions.  It doesn't have a clock, but it works through a light sensor.  And it did work just as he had suspected.  So that is set up, and was used for a few hours tonight.  I will have to reset the timer though.  It was set for two hours tonight, since I didn't hook it up until 20:00 or so.  Hmm, might do that right now, for tomorrow night...  Nah, I'll do it in the morning.  I don't know if changing the settings now might turn the lights back on.  Could see, but no reason to add fuss to my night.  When my camera arrives, I'll use it to do a few pictures, but won't post them until after Christmas.

Why a camera?  Ah, there is more reason than what some might think.  It's not just a tool, or a toy.  As I am beginning to live, again, and settling down, I want to become alive through memories other than those of just the mind.  The idea of having a wife, perhaps children, means I want something to remember these things through... more keenly than just animal memory.  A new life indeed, but with the potential to live one in which memories are important.  So, starting this year, if not as a resolution but a reality, I am beginning to remember a life lived, through pictures.  My cats, myself to a smaller degree, vehicles, my home, the seasons, even the repairs, updates, other projects, and such.  A new way for an old dog.  It's a Nikon d7100, so it even does video.  I may, in time, seek a lens which definitely allows manual focus, and train with that.  For now, just pictures.

I just bought the body.  I ordered a 50mm with it, no kit lenses.  I will buy a lens or two a year, perhaps after a couple of lenses in the queue.  Buying good lenses, if not pro-lenses exactly.  Just so long as they fit and work well.  But the 50, and with a further step down in crop, can work as a 50 or a 70-80mm.  I have done a ton of research, since the order.  I will be shooting in raw, so in a second order ordered a minor raw editor, if I am looking at a better editor.  Yeah, yeah, but...  The first is probably easier to work with, the second will be a bit more technical.  Ugh...  Can't quite ever get it perfect the first time.  The wallet, research time, and other factors make sure that some mistakes will happen.

I suppose I should go deal with trash, then wash the dishes and set them to a hot rinse bath.  Later.

Little flash of something.

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I was chuckling about something I said or wrote.  Somehow, a woman approached me.  Younger, perhaps in her early to late 20's.  She kept looking at me until I acknowledged her presence, like puppies sometimes do.  Yes, I asked.  She arranged her mind, taking her time, looking at me for just a bit, then asked but really stated, do you think you are funny?  I gave just a pause, taking her in, mind, boobs, butt, temperament, and all.  I looked sideways for just a moment.  I already knew the answer, I was just enjoining in her created drama.  I then looked at her, right at her, deeply into her eyes.  I leaned toward her, just a bit, to become more personal.  No, I said.  I do not think I am funny.  I know I am!  I started laughing again, as I had been when she first approached.

What about me, she said.  I took that to mean she wanted to know if I was funny, or could be, to her.  This answer, too, I knew.  But, drama being drama, you have to stretch these things out.  It's a girl's game, and I have no reservations about playing it to her satisfaction, within the realm of reals anyway.  I told her that I had one question for her, which she must answer, before I could answer her question.  She became slightly testy in mood, squaring up and drawing in her defenses.  I could have explained that for an answer to be correct, in spite of it not being a question, for me to answer, I needed more information.  I preferred to let her squirm in decision making, so did not share this tidbit.  She had come to me with war on her mind, after all.

She finally acquiesced to answering the question.  She relaxed just a bit, readying herself to ponder some unknown request for knowledge, as a dog seeing his master prepare to throw a stick sits up and focuses on the item.  A brief pause, for drama and to allow her to ready herself, then I let it fly.  For me to tell you if I can make you laugh, I need to know one thing.  Were you weened on a dill pickle.

*grins*

Not sitting on laurels.

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Yesterday was yesterday, what have I done today?  Bah!  I just, for the most part, woke up.  Still, I got the latter out and set up, gathered all the gear, climbed up on the roof and strung the last of the lights.  Yeah, it's a bit... off.  The extension cords I purchased do on work.  A third plug with no place to put it.  It looks okay, even having to adjust everything over to get the new lights to string right into the first line of lights.  I have them plugged in directly, for now.  I need to figure out this newfangled timer.  It looks horrible.  I don't think there is even a clock on it.  Just a setting for 2, 4, and 6 hours, for sure.  Maybe it's in there, I'll know after a little breather.

As well, I will finish the dishes tonight, and take care of the socks.  I have underwear and towels from the last load to fold and put away.  The main things, like jeans and shirts, were folded and hung.  I just don't care about creases in underwear or towels, and ran out of energy.  Then I've been busy since.  Tomorrow is a home day.  Probably through Wednesday evening or Thursday will be home.  I have things to do.

Tomorrow I would like vacuum and sweep, set up the living room for a steam vac, and maybe mop again.  I can't believe how fast my place gets dirty.  With the rug out from under the table, I feel more comfortable monkey around with keeping that up.  Keep it simple or do it yourself, and some things just have to be very simple in order for me to wrap my mind around.  Housecleaning is one of those things.  In the next few days, I should have the cave ship shape.  Then I will either start in on the garage or my bedroom.  Perhaps bits of each.  After that?  Finally, perhaps, work on the en suite.  Tearing out the old vanity, removing the mirror, taking out the old toilet, relocating the new water heater until the room is done, tearing out the floor, painting the walls perhaps...  It's coming.  This time, I am actually getting there.  Still, we'll see.

Back to some music while I take my break.  Later.

Now that was a dream.

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At least it wasn't exhausting.  There was action.  It just wasn't the focus.  I saw the whole life the the trickster who became War.  I saw the first footsteps of the first child he was.  Never knew the lineage, in all the lives, from being told or otherwise informed directly.  Over time, as the world came into a sort of view and understanding when life lasted long enough, surety regarding lineage through the ages and multiples of fleshly life came, and then solidified.  Eventually, through the stacking of the past into the present, and the ease of finding information on such matter, it became an understanding that came at a younger and younger age, until this last time when it became known before puberty.

The first death.  Older into life.  In the early days, most lived longer, though not all of his forms.  Some groups of both men, or men like beings, and some nephilim, lived rather short lives.  And that has varied, for those groups, throughout time.  A chief of some sort, tanned skin from living a nomadic life hunting and warring, buckskins, several wives... a natural thing for a good hunter, more so a long lived one.  I remember the last of that time, the last sun setting on that life, the picture above is very close, just put that out of his dwelling, looking south with an afternoon sun.  I did not know, going to bed that night that I would not wake.

Many lives have happened since.  At some point, things started to become difficult.  Remembering past lives, seeing, and knowing that he was different from most of his kin.  Sometimes a hero, sometimes... not.  Never could quite stitch it all together, or even always deal with guilt, shame, and such, from many lives, as they would come to haunt.  Most men have difficulty dealing with those problems just in one life.  More so for one with many lives, and trying to connect the dots between the lives, or put all of the past and present together.  Without, sometimes, enough memory to put it all together.  Sometimes reduced to a raving lunatic from the weight of it, sometimes going the way of a holy man to deal with the ghosts that haunted.  I suppose, this is part of why a trickster might be known as a being of many faces.  Part of it.

On through time, falling into a new future while never being completely able to leave the past.  Like a hard drive in a computer, reused but never really able to be wiped clean.  Bits and pieces remain.  Layering so that the various times might become confused.  Stray data introduced from long ago word processing into spread sheets, music into games, and so on.  Never quite sure if haunted by his own past, or a ghost of another.  Usually just a side issue, unless madness happened.  Something to ponder on long cold nights while out hunting, or other times of solitude. 

Ages of lives exist.  Thousands of years of history, thoughts, ideas as a man of his times, given age and current to that life understandings, then being mixed with older understandings and sentiments.  Ancient to be sure, long lived, many voices and views, but all, as time went on, becoming one.  How do you correct for that?  You don't.  You let it all work it's way through.  Age within the life, the right conditions, and poof, things begin to make sense.

Many lives, many friends, many enemies, many wives, many kin, much war.  On I tumbled through the dream.  Far too much was seen and done for me to understand myself, far too much to write.  Each of many, if by no means all, life lived out in movies.  Not always interesting ones, or even the interesting parts.  Some I had not seen before, others I remember well.  A dream more epic Than all the epic movies for the last century into this one combined.  I suppose everybody has to start, then be, somewhere.  And so I did, was, and am.

I can't really make any sense of it, or pull any wisdom out of it, or...  It just was a dream.  If more, it is what it is.  I suppose I could infer some things from it.  As to how some understandings exist, and why the notion of having many faces exists, at least in part.  There might be other things in there.  But most I wish to just let it be a dream.  Just woke, so my brain is a little disconnected with the body, and I am not awake enough to edit.  If I edit, I will do that later.  I might add material, if it comes to me.  But for now, that's a story for you to consume, maybe enjoy.

I think so?

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While I woke... reasonably well, to make it to town at a reasonable time, I ended up getting a bloody nose.  That first song, in the post "Little is what it seems", yeah... I get a bloody nose when watching it.  Fiction is stranger than truth?  Yeah, I know it goes the other way around for public consumption.  The problem is, what most take for fiction... in some settings... isn't.  So, just work with me.  Right when the twins get it, too.  It's happened five times now, including just a bit ago after getting home.  Yeah, don't ask me.

To dinner, then a couple of stores.  A new timer, two fifteen and one fifty foot extension cord, a couple of extension cord reels should, if weather holds, see the last of lights up yet this year.  Tomorrow, most likely.  Then on to the grocery store.  I think I have made my friend into an addict.  Whole whipping cream for coffee... it really does make a difference.  And it's sweetness isn't from sugar, as it is with powdered creamer.  You just can't beat the luxury of real fat.  Yum!  Milk as well, and a few odds and ends.  I need to figure out what I want in omelets and a few other egg dishes. 

As things are now, I can slice veggies and ham or such the night before, and enough in advance for a few days of various egg dishes.  Not even just for eggs, but for other little bites.  I do need to find a general recipe I really like, work that up to my designs, buy spices and work up a spice profile or three, and... then practice until I can do it in my sleep.  I am going to try to figure out at least two squares a day, within a budget, that is practical and easy enough, and try to keep the engine going.  Cutting medicine is one part, but feeding the motor is another.  I have to stop eating five to seven meals a week.   Hmm, I do, or used to, have All-Clad skillet, with a non-stick coating.  For omelets, nothing really is better.  I haven't been able to find it though.  I am pretty sure people have been in my home, and things do go missing, but usually not the better, bigger, things.  The pan is, or was, somewhere in the $100-$200 range.  Yeah, it's worth it.  I'll look some more.

I'll be taking it easy the next few days.  I still have socks to deal with, and the dishes to do.  And I will do them.  But I need to back off a bit.  I will get those tasks done though.  The only other thing I want to work with is finishing the sharpening.  The last parts of my sharpening kit arrived.  I bought a couple of general kits, and found that, with my dremel, I might also be able to polish my stainless steel silverware.  I was disappointed in the scratches.  Until I went looking over sharpening pastes, and stumbled onto the notion, I didn't think to polish that out.  Who knew?!?  Yeah, but a rest, mostly, other than those little things.

Later, or good night.  Hmm, might go see if the nose can start bleeding again, first. 

Not much done yesterday.

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I didn't get to a thing.  Too little sleep, up too long the day before, doing too much lately, I don't know.  I didn't quite just sit, if moving around more often didn't translate to work.  I did get to bed earlier, yesterday, than where my morning has been going.  Down at 6:00, and I set the alarm for 13:00.  Just as a minder, since my friend was going to start calling somewhere around 14:00.  I heard it, and turned it off.  I heard his first phone call but couldn't have reached it, but was ready for the second call.  A bit before 15:00, I think.  It's a little after 15:00, now, and I haven't been up long at all so that must be about right.

I need a cup or two of coffee, then a shower.  I don't think it will be all that long before I am in town.  Cords, maybe a timer (I'll check those places quickly, should be easy to check), some groceries, and dinner.  He has some grocery shopping to do too.  I don't know if he wants to do any window shopping.  It won't be a long or fancy day.  It seems that the sun has come out.  It's been... what, a week of mostly cloudy days?  I just hope I don't burn too much.

I'm not waking really well or easily, but I think I should be awake and in... before too long.  He sounded hungry for food, though, so I best not tarry.  I am hoping, when I return, to get to some things.  The rest of the Christmas lights tonight or tomorrow, socks, dishes, and that might be it.  Or maybe I can vacuum a few areas and set the living room for a steam vac session. 

While I am not quite back on the gang, I am sort of hedging my way there.  No time for recriminations, the past, or hard feelings at the moment.  Never worry, they will get their dues, as I will get mine.  They must worry about their own as I contend with mine.  Best get to getting to it.  *whipschhh*  Who would have thought being chained and worked like a dog would be a fond memory, thrown back into the full vagaries of life, and all.  Sentimental, a nut, or understanding of reality?  All three, when honesty is applied, for my take.  Not a bad thing, just probably real and true.  Yes, best get... at least more coffee down.

Later.

Little is what it seems.

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I realized some time ago, a long time ago, if I forget and remember over and again, that there is only ever one war I have fought that means anything.  All the other fights, battles, and wars were merely preparatory.  Teaching me to fight, finally, after the real war, a war that I do not actually fight.  A general, of sorts, fighting through will, with mind, using others.  I know these things.  I have always known them.  They are forgotten, at times, for various reasons.  Much as a chef may forget how to cut onions while in the middle of a produce market buying frenzy, or forget how to drive while fleshing a whole half an animal.  Only so much can be on the mind, in this limited form, at a time.

Doing well.

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Yeah, yeah, my sleep cycle is nuts.  I only slept seven hours, actually a bit shy of it, today.  However, I am doing a lot of little bits and pieces, and keeping up on other things.  First thing, I set the dishes to a fresh soak.  While I did that I took the tags off the new glasses and cups and put those in to wash as well.  Most of those will go down, boxed and packed with the glass containers.  Extras, and for the glass containers a potential for future use.

The bathroom is quite nice.  The inside of the toilet is kept rather clean anymore.  But the outside needs cleaning, as does the bath tub.  I'm not sure what I have will work for that.  I may do just a bit of research on what keeps porcelain in tip top shape, what to use for extra duty cleaning, and get some of that the next time I am at the store.

I called my friend to see if he wants to go out tomorrow night.  It looks like that is a go.  I suggested he start calling at 14:00 and not stop until I answer the phone.  Go to bed earlier, he suggest.  I would if I could, I lament.  I hope to buy extra extension cords, and a timer, if I don't find one tonight.  There is one or two more places I haven't checked.  They aren't expensive, but they aren't free.  I would just rather use my old one.  Groceries, too, and a dinner.  I am doing quite well, if it is just a bunch of little things, mostly.  Oh, socks!  They should be dry.  I'll check those in an hour or so, then finish washing dishes an hour after that.  I don't have a whole lot else on the schedule, though I may see if I can arrange the living room for a steam vacuuming today or tomorrow.  Yeah.  Tomorrow I will do that and sweep and mop in the little room off the kitchen.  While doing that, I might as well hit the kitchen floor, whole, again.

After that, I think I will take a few days break from cleaning, and perhaps just game.  I would still like to get into the garage, and I would also like to tear my bedroom down and get in there.  And, of course, there is redoing the en suite bathroom.  I want the garage ready for work before I hit the bathroom, though, so...  Yeah, the next project is cleaning and organizing the garage/workshop.  That will be my base of operation for any other maintenance, repair, and construction after that.  It will open up a whole new world of possibilities.  As well as I have been doing, while it will be slow, I do think I am beginning to rally.  Cutting medicine was required.  In a week or two I may increase that just one more notch, but I will need to speak with my doctors.  They won't like it, but they don't have to live in the squalor of being too heavily medicated.  Oh, and I did look for rubber matting, for the weight bench.  I may look at some other places.  I want inch thick, real rubber, 4', per foot rolls rather than mats.  Mats seem to be more expensive.  Yes, I do intend to begin working out again.  Light and easy, to start off.  Just the bar, probably.  The ultimate goal is 1.5 to 2 x my weight.  A darn good incentive to lose weight, too!  :p

Well... back to... something.  Later.

Couldn't sleep.

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It just wouldn't happen.  I've gone ahead with some things.  The bathroom floor was mopped twice, then rinsed.  The mop and caddy have been rinsed thoroughly, several times.  I also found the glasses I mean to wash and put downstairs, setting those on the table I just cleared of plastic containers.  *sigh*  I am getting closer to getting the table top cleaned off.  Toolboxes, then the plastic containers, and I think this is the last group of items I'll want to set on the table for a while.  The laundry has... well... I gave it an extra spin, and set the timer.  After those, I am hoping to set dishes to soak.  Actually, I have most of those soaking right now, just not in the big wash basin.

I've been dragging, trying to get to sleep.  Since I can't seem to go to bed, I figured I might as well do more, and more.  Not a lot more than planned, but a few things whenever I go to the kitchen or bathroom.  Perhaps a little food will allow my system to kick over into sleep mode.  Digestion, especially after a long day, can be just what the doctor ordered.  Junk food doesn't work, but real food can.  I will fold or hang everything in the dryer, though, before sleeping.  And put the socks in for a good long fluff dry session. 

Not bad, but being almost 11:00, not good either.  My schedule is zipping around harshly.  Weather patterns, if I had to guess.  Really cold, really warm, and even more when the weather is in flux, and this is what I get.  I try to adjust the thermostat to account for these things, but it really doesn't work.  I can sort of sense what is going on.  Various health issues play a role, or can do that by themselves, several ailments, more so as a group.  I can never quite tell, merely suspect.  I simply suspect it's changing weather that has me dancing around the dial.

Well... good night/day, almost for sure this time.  If you get tired, just send that desire to me and I will fill it in spirit. 

Late!

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Yeah, well, it was later yesterday night/morning.  I may just call it a night.  Oh, wait, I have laundry to fuss with.  After that...  Bah!  That'll make it just as late as yesterday... this morning actually.  Wait, no, it was yesterday morning.  Gets messy when day and night spin around.  For example, last night, depending on the time, was this morning or yesterday evening.  My morning was later afternoon.  Messy. 

I did get the glass bowls down and the plastic up, washed one load of laundry, started another, and so I have a little more drying time on the first load then need to put the other load in.  Wait, second load is wool socks.  I can leave those in the dryer.  Since I just use fluff, for all drying, they can just stay in the dryer until the morning.  Well, my morning... late afternoon to you.  I also cleared the bathroom and mopped most of it.  I was going to get the last corner, near the door, but got distracted and then forgot.  I'll get that, and maybe do it again before I sleep.  If I get that taken care of, I may put what dishes need washed in to soak overnight... through the day, to you.

I would like to get the glass bowls packed and downstairs, but I will wait until the dishes are done.  I have a number of glasses I wish to wash, pack with the bowls, and take down as a unit, give or take.  I did a few other things, including making a meal.  It was canned, but I had menudo.  Then I cut up onions and jalapenos for a couple of cheese quesadillas.  Nothing fancy.  Wow, I couldn't really taste the peppers.  Next time I will just leave the seeds and such in.  There were a few other things I managed to do, as well.  I can't recall, I just know there were a few other tidbits.  All good.  And yet I think I kept it to a day of rest. 

Well... I better get back to things if I want to sleep before sunup.  Good night.  Or later, if I am hoping not.

Yeah, sleep is tumbling again.

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I'm not really going to fight it, for now.  I have things I want to get done, and can't waste the energy on fighting for a losing cause.  I'll work as I can.  Today, though, is another rest day.  But not an empty one, I hope.

I have two things I am focusing on more than anything.  I want to put the plastic bowls up in useable space, and take the glass containers out, for now.  Then I want to hit the bathroom, if that is several jobs.  When I start the bathroom, I'll take the dirty clothes from there and elsewhere, to get a load of laundry going, then hit the rest of the bathroom.  Mostly just sweeping and mopping, I think.  Though, I suppose, I could see what I have to clean the tub.  Both of those jobs might end up being pretty good little sets of tasks, none of them so straightforward as they seem.  Depending on how long those take, that might be it.

Still, I would like to arrange things in the living room in preparation for steam vacuuming tomorrow.  I would like to do a rough clean up in the kitchen, just to keep it up.  Sweeping, starting a load of dishes when the bathroom is clean, cleaning off surfaces, just a little upkeep to keep on top of things in there.  And, maybe, sweep in the little off-kitchen place, under the litter boxes, and such.  I like how my place looks, and would like to try to not only keep that, but move on to other areas.  They did the heavy stuff, all I have are little things and areas.  I like it like that, but... can't do more than coast on cleanliness, usually.  If I can, for the most part, maintain this, I'll have my mother out in the spring.  That's a lottttt of coasting.  So...

While I do hope to steam vac tomorrow, that job shouldn't be too long of an effort.  If I can get to it, I may try to make it to town.  With sleep off,  I don't know when.  Shooting probably won't happen, but I can at least get my friend out of the apartment, or even stop by and see what he is working on.  Perhaps a bit of both.  While in town, I want to look for a few more weather resistant extension cords, and a timer for the Christmas lights, if I don't find the old one before then.  Oh, I'll need more clips too, to attach to the roof and hang the lights.

Not bad.  I've been doing quite well.  Focusing on just a few things, getting odds and ends in there by want or accident/incident while at other things.  It's been quite good.  Medicines have been restarted, if very slowly.  That is taking a minor toll, but is manageable at this point.  I seem to be staying up long, but sleep is good and about right.  If I end up staying up a lot longer, I do sleep more than my usual eight hours, but for me that is normal and required.  Life is being pretty good.  But it is very humble.  Just a few small things every day.  I have also been cooking and eating well enough.  Once, sometimes twice, a day!  And keeping up on dishes, both that which I use to cook and eat with.  Really, quite nice.  This may be as good as it gets, but it ain't too bad.  This, right here, these last few weeks, even with the sleep shifting, is as good as I have known life since first becoming ill.  Sweetness!

Later.

More, less, about the same?

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I did finish the cat litter boxes.  The last is drying and should be ready... now.  Trash is out, if I did have to sweep.  I tried to pull the bag, but with a minor tear in it, some of the littler spilled.  I just took the container out, bag in.  I didn't get to the bathroom, the little bit of sweeping, and such.  I did, however, rearrange my tool chests, loading what I wanted in what I wanted loaded, for now.  I decided to wash my old tool kit.  It will be hand for smaller tools, or I might set it up for bike/small mechanical, or even put tools in it just for the vehicle.  I'm considering.  I did a number of other small tasks as well.  It just seems, no matter how I try to focus, I rarely get exactly what I planned.  In this case, it was a trade, and I did prefer the work that was done.  It wasn't a mistake, just a mistake in evaluating my plan.  A load of laundry tomorrow, and the bathroom will get cleaned.  I may see about replacing the screen on the faucet in the bathroom when I fill that last litter box and clean out the tool box.  It's plastic, and soaking in hot sudsy water at the moment. 

I did order myself a Christmas present.  I looked over finances, and thought about it.  I've been thinking about it all year, and actually for the last several years.  All I will say is that it requires lenses.  I went, initially, solely, with a 50mm, and have a 40mm (macro) for next month, and perhaps a 55-300mm for spring.  Of course, you don't ever just buy an item like this.  There are bits, pieces, and a carrying option, rechargeable batteries, and... well...  Still, it was on sale.  I spent less on exactly what I wanted, and kit, than I would have spent for the body alone just five or six months ago, when I lasted checked.  I thought about a computer, but... what I want is a bit much.  Oh, yes, I am watching things.  I have a hog coming in, a consideration for a side of beef, and a Christmas present that might come soon or late.  I have been watching my wallet, closely...  save when I'm not watching it, but then I'm just not spending or doing anything else. 

It's wonderful to have the Christmas lights up.  The next time I am in town, I will look for (another) timer, and more extension cords.  If it works well, and weather doesn't close in, I may get the upper tier of lights going as well.  A subject for my Christmas present.  I have to wonder how long before the girls get tired of me chasing them around, snappy snapping?  Or... whoever, or whatever.  I have seen views, lately, that made me wish I had a camera.  Just earlier today, we had clouds coming over the mountains to my southwest.  But there was a broken line, somewhat resembling a halo, where the sun was shooting past the mountain clouds and hitting the higher clouds to create a golden line.  It was... awesome.  Not sure the 50mm will do that justice, and I'm sure the 40mm wouldn't as it is more for macro (as I begin cooking, I may catalog my dishes, and any things I make or do that fit with a macro, even repairs and such).  Yeah... well...  We'll see.

Good night.

Work is going forward.

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A bit of a break first.  A good time to post.

I cleaned and cleared, then washed, one of the cat litter boxes.  When it dries and I fill it, I'll just do the other two right then.  It's getting late.  I took one of the trash bags out, the other will wait until I empty the other litter boxes.  Usually I have one trash and one recycling, but in the cleanup both went to trash use.  I'll get that fixed as well.  I also strung the lights in the front yard pines, and put a string across the lower edge of my roof line.  A husband sport.  I realized why I had never done it as a bachelor.  And why most married men look forward to it.  Then a call to my mother, to let her know.  And that her Christmas present is on the way.  Utility, but fashionable even so.

I still have the other litter boxes to sort out, the tool boxes to figure, and the bathroom to hit.  Just the floor in the bathroom, though the tub ought to get hit shortly.  I am getting things done, and closer to other things.  If I can get a couple days off in a row, and do a bit of prep in there, I am hoping to hit the living room carpet with the steam vac.  Hmm, there are a number of other things, but I want to do more in the home before it all collapses in on me again.  This time I think I can take more full advantage.  I've been keeping up fairly well lately.  Yeah, I may need to take tomorrow off again, if a few more tasks, like today, could go forward.

Well, another steak!  I bought three that were at the edge of the store's ability to sell, so at a bargain.  But I found, in the past, that letting them sit even a few days is not good. So, when I cooked that first steak, I cooked the others as well.  They last longer once cooked, at least the late date ones, than they would uncooked.  Further, once cooked, just a bit of heating and they get eaten quickly.  I will have the last one.  It was just a waif of a thing but will do nicely.  Later.

Yes, yes, I am awake.

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It was a bit of a late start.  I could have woken earlier.  I know I saw the opportunity.  Then again, I actually thought I was going to get up so I can't swear that it was a true opportunity.  *lights out*  It wasn't too late of a start, just a bit later.  Dreams perfumed sleep throughout.  As with a recent night, I remember nothing much.  This time there is a little hum.  A woman hums as she goes about her business.  A pleasant thing.  I don't know if I know her, but I do know I like her.  And she can carry a tune wonderfully.  Yes, I do like her.

Today?  Oh, now that trash has been taken, I'll get on with cat litter and taking trash out.  The bin was too full for more, after housecleaning.  So I had to wait.  And I have been to town the last few days.  I meant to do it yesterday, when I returned.  I just never got to it.  As well, I think now would be a good time to put Christmas lights up.  The lights for the trees out front, and new ones for the roof line.  I might be able to case the whole lower front roof.  That is, assuming the clips I purchased will work with my roof.  If not, I might fight some other place for them.  Oh, and I would like to finish cleaning the bathroom.  I did fix the faucet in there, it was a clogged water limiter, right at the faucet tip.  I'll look at that, see if I can replace the screen without the limiter, while I'm working in there.  If I can actually get to any of it.  But, mostly, today is a day for rest.  I don't know about tomorrow, I may need to rest then too, but my goal is to get out if the weather is good enough.  Target practice is the goal, and work with the chronograph.  I did remember batteries for it.

Part of my problem, right now, is that it got a good bit cooler.  I had the thermostat set a bit low.  That may be why I have been sleeping in a bit.  I won't keep it all that warm at night, but the door open a bit might help.  That and turning the heat up in the morning.  Hmm...  I might put program the device again, so that it warms well in the morning, then backs off a bit when I get up, cooling in the early evening to set up a better sleep pattern.  Sometimes that works, sometimes it fails miserably.  Health issues don't allow me to run on a schedule all that well.

Later.

Not extremely handy.

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When I can, though, on something I have done, I can repeat.  I like working, tinkering, and doing.  I just... forget, get lost in thought, or health goes south.  Mix and match and I just don't get to it.  I got a chance tonight, and while I was at it, I added to my gear.  It took me a good little while to collect what I needed.  I decided, as I have done with plumbing, I will do also with various other specialized kits.  Further, I wanted a better tool kit for my standard use items.  I like having, pretty much, everything I need for various tasks all together.  The biggest tool kit is just the standard tool kit.  Take it with, so things are less likely to get lost.  And all your tools are right there if you happen to need just a screwdriver.  Working on the bathroom?  Fine, but all the tools are right there.  Grab the screwdriver, then take it right back.  Organization, while a weak spot, is something I am working on.

Today was really supposed to be a day of rest.  And I could have used it.  I was able to get out easily enough, though, and go do.  I will need tomorrow off.  Mostly off.  I am hoping to finish cleaning in the bathroom, change the litter... cleaning each pan as I do so which means a lot of time, as I let them dry, doing one at a time so the girls have something, then filling the dry cleaned pan as I take another pan, and a few other minor chores.  Nothing big, and in small steps.  Hopefully the day after the weather will cooperate and we can get out shooting.  It won't be long before there won't be an opportunity, for the cold or the snow.

It is good to be helpful.  I don't know much, I can't always help, things are a bit crazy at times.  When I can, I not only do, but enjoy it.  If I could get up to working even most of a day, a few days a week, I'd just become a handyman for hire.  No charges but the materials, if I don't happen to have them.  Perhaps a bite to eat if the project takes long.  Have hammer, will travel?  Yeah, I really would if I could.  I couldn't build a porch, but steps, or replace wood, maybe a little drywall work, or hanging a shelf.  Perhaps even slightly larger projects, but not too much larger.  Still, I am sure skills would grow over time, and through research and learning.  If is the biggest word.  Tinker, tailor, soldier, sailor, and more.

Oh, right... a bit of music then on to bed, when I can.  Later, perhaps good night.

Contemplation and coffee.

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As I go through mental conniptions regarding women, glide through an early to bed but late wake, and make plans for various projects, the day goes on a bit without me.  Medicine has started to do it's own thing, just as the day and myself do our own things.  For moments they merge, then part.  All good.

My mind was focused on women, a wife really, and why I would contemplate such a relationship given that I have freed myself of want and need.  Oh, truly, I have.  Ah, but the clearing wasn't for it's own purposes.  The cleaning was to prepare myself for a woman, for my part.  Yes, there is that.  A decade, and change, of penance.  Not just to cleanse the body, mind, possibly soul or spirit to a degree.  But also to review and consider what it means to be with a woman.  What women mean, or should mean, in the relationship.  What my duties and responsibilities are.  Heavy things, for one such as myself, but having been brought into God's light.  A new way, if the old way cannot be completely ignored.  Recreating the circuit board, laying new connections and solder over the old.  No new board is possible in this life.

I realize that I am hungry.  Plainly, and simply, of course.  I have always loved the mechanics of the feminine.  Soft skin, soft high pitched voice, big eyes, and of course more on into adult natures.  No toy, as I had it devised, but no duty, this aspect.  Pure pleasure when the hunger exists, if pure pain when hunger is sated and the need for speed in life returns.  To find a middle ground for the majority of the time?  Aye.  Sought and found.  My hunger grows, as I suspect, does my maturity.  Maturity, a beginning of wisdom.  A chance at more, if through less.  A duty, until it becomes a blessed pleasure.  Celibacy taught me to this point, but can take me no further.

And yet more.  For the middling times, when hunger is not in bloom and despise is not waxing, there is a new hunger I have seen.  The hunger for simple companionship of a mixed nature.  A friend, of sorts, or more confidant, teacher, student, coworker in the effort of life, and partner in mutual, even at times exclusive, goals.  Someone to lift, and be lifted through.  Sister, mother, daughter, wife, woman.  The whole package.  In return, all of me, as it is desired or needed, as well.  So much and so little.  How many angels, indeed, can dance on the head of a pin?  Magical questions with so very simple mundane answers.  There is more, but that is enough.  Questions, answers, poems, and prose, I see through these, now, why.  And I see the fullness of my newfound, or refound, hunger.  And I approve, if yet with some trepidation.

As I said, I woke late in spite of going to bed early.  Some odd thing happened, and I pushed through yesterday on little sleep.  A price had to be paid.  I cannot run deficits as I did in my youth, not without... hmm... help.  I have promised to help a friend today, and so I will.  A call to remind.  I simply said I would help today, if later most likely.  I need to find my tools and supplies, get them in order, and get to town shortly.  An hour or two, I suspect.  It is good to be useful, is all.  To decrease the burden of worry on the brow of another is a gift I have received a thousand times over, and so have some great yearning to offer myself.  Shown, they say, before one can see.  But when seen, such cannot be ignored.  Even the blind can be taught to see.  This I know.

Oh, just so you know...  While women get some things I post right away, where men cannot.  Some things are written only of the tongue of men.  There is some crossover, if that is limited.  My recent post, "The beast and the... not harlot" was written in man-tongue.  I sincerely doubt if women will understand that, not... maidens, to be sure.  Wives, mothers more, understand this as few women can.  Having a husband and a son from him, allows her insights a young woman cannot yet know.  Even so, that is limited.  For example, in the song Moth, all but the woman putting pins in the moth is from my perspective.  They are not mixed examples of my sins against women or the world, though some debate some things from ignorance even then.  Difficult to explain without saying too much.  But, no, little ones, I have never been abusive to women.  If anything, when women and alcohol mix, I become an even softer touch if not an outright fool.  I learned long ago that women will put up with much, but not so much put up with a fool.  A complete fool anyway.  Drink only loosens, it does not unbind me as it does with some.  Anyway, just... understand... for the most part, that was written, and played, from the perspective of a man.  You aren't probably going to understand.  Yes, boys and girls are different, men and woman far more so.  If some of us can see into both worlds just a bit more clearly.  So that not even all of it is purely from a man's perspective.  For example, I'm Not an Angel is about both sides of the conundrum, and understanding that while obviously am not an angel, neither  will she be one.  Careful in there, the mind of Doom is a thing to... ponder, not know.  Scoot.

Well...  I need to get going on coffee.  I had a ribeye for breakfast.  I thought about eggs, too, but this was a thick cut.  While in the store, I looked in the sale aisle and found this and others.  Less than $5 a pound, I think.  Enough for today.  I need to digest it, though.  And wake a bit... a lot... more.  An hour doing those things, then I will get my kit together.  Later.

Way late, way early.

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To sleep, then awake, that is.  Not quite 6:00 and I woke without a problem.  I am not quite sure if this is a readjustment, if that is doubtful.  I'll know as the day rolls on, more surely tomorrow morning, and definitely the morning after.  Some very high percentage of the times, when I roll back sleep by many hours, it means my days and nights are about to begin tumbling.  Once in a great while I catch and maintain the new schedule.  This time is a little different.  The causes aren't from natural distortions, and aren't finding me foggy and cranky, awake merely because I can't sleep.  Still, that may not matter.  I simply won't know until a bit of time passes and I see future results.  Probability is not on the good side is all.

I let the girls sleep with me.  Only Sam came in until 3:00 or 4:00, when Sassy decided, or realized, the option was open.  Have you ever slept with children?  While sometimes, as a parent, that is wonderful.  It is also, at times, a bit cloying.  You can't just roll.  You can't just anything.  You have to make sure the little one(s) are in agreement to movement.  So you don't sleep really deeply.  It was good enough, and I often sleep that way.  One eye open they say, if that truly is just a metaphor.  At least I hope no one actually sleeps with one eye open, especially a cyclopes!  When I am doing well, I usually sleep light.  Now, when I hear a bump in the night, mind you, I ignore.  When I hear two, I listen a bit more closely, three or more?  I just bring my pistol right to bed with me.  Hey, I used to be that bump in the night.  Don't go looking.  If you are the target, it will find you.  If not, it's not worth checking.  As a family man that changes.  As a bachelor, not so much.  Not fear, for me, just don't want to mess up sleep.  Unless I'm in the mood or can't sleep anyway.  Then it's go time.  Ha!

I know I dreamed, a number of times.  I don't remember anything.  Memory dissipated before I became conscious enough to know.  There were just little traces of some things.  Sometimes those come to me later, but as emotional responses.  As with trying to figure out the shapes of things from shadows, and the location of the casters of those, it's never quite clear what it is all about.  Sometimes, usually, the dreams just end up just going away.  I suppose they turn into sludge for the bilge, or are refined into fuel for future dreams.  Who can know about such things.  Pet theories abound, however.  None of which have been shared here.  Too early for theories anyway.

I did get the trash and recycling out last night.  I also called my friend.  He said it was, and had been, snowing all day there.  What?  When dinner was brought, no snow was seen.  Still, I checked.  Gah!  He was right.  The forecasts I had seen were all wrong.  They said showers for the valleys.  No real mistake, only they didn't know when the precip would be coming through.  Earlier in the day it would have been rain.  It all melted off the drive though, or was off last night.  And it seemed to stop between the call and when I finally got the bins to the curb.  Being away from the mountains, even just by the twenty miles, makes it so we often don't get the kind of snow he will get.  Not always anyway.

Oh, because of the snow, he thinks shooting is off today.  Still, I want to get groceries, and get out.  He thinks that sounds like a plan.  He is getting cabin fever.  Just happened.  Probably seeing the first real snow set off something.  A bit of browsing, then grocery shopping, and lunch, I suspect.  I did look, a bit, for how to run my chronograph.  I really don't want to read instructions.  I didn't find much useful, I might look around this morning.  But I did learn that the overcast actually is when the chronograph works best.  So there is that.  I am almost sure the weather will pick up for a day of shooting, or two, yet this week.  But the forecasters sure didn't see the snow.  I won't be holding my breath, just hoping.

Well... on to something.  Good morning, and later.

One more razor done.

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Well, done to the level I can do them at this point.  Something I learned while doing research is that putting a light coating of mineral oil on the blade, after honing and after shaving, will keep the blade in good condition.  I happened to have some, so coated not just the blades I have honed, but all of them.  And, after honing this one, I coated it again.  A cue-tip, oil, and a light touch.  Okay, now, that made sense.  It also has taught me how to oil my other tools.  That has been on my mind for some time.  From wrenches to socket and socket wrenches, on to shovels and such, I have been... bothered by the notion of oiling.  While I might not use the same oils on all, or maybe... breaking new ground opens up care for my tools.  I am certain the wheel grinder will work to get rust off my bigger tools, but an angle grinder might be necessary for some of it.  Then to paint or oil the tools.  Yeah, tools can only take care of you if you take care of them.

If I wake well tomorrow, I may get a shower in early, and try shaving again.  I am a bit extra jittery, due to my last stab at shaving some years back.  There was blood, and wounds.  Don't shave with a blade that isn't sharp enough.  And, no, the knife you carry, no matter how sharp, is not even designed to be as sharp as a razor needs to be.  My problem is that I sent my razors through a sharpening process at the manufacturers, and that was wasted money.  Don't do that.  I trusted and was repaid with blood and cuts.  If you get them sharpened, find a barber who still uses them and ask if he would mind.  It will probably be cheaper, and much more sure.  Still, as sharp as these are, they still need to be a bit sharper.  But at least they don't cut me, they just pull a bit much.  It's coming back from long ago I think.  I'll get them there.  The new supplies should be here within the week.  Probably.  Amazon seems to have fallen down on delivery this last year, or I have been ordering outliers?

Oh, I best get the trash out, and recycling.  I suppose I will know if recycling was this week or not tomorrow afternoon.  I will call my friend after this post, to see if he is interested in getting out.  Finally, I will figure out my Chrony.  It would be good to see how that works, and get it to work if it will.  While warm enough, into the 50's, it has been cloudy lately.  I have heard that it might not do well in that condition.  Still, I would like to try.  Then to bed.  Earlier tonight, I hope.  Good night.

Resting even today.

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I took a shower right after posting.  It does a body good.  I thought about trying a shave, with my whiskers having been primed by the shower.  It just seemed like too much work right then and there.  Some days it is.  Today was among them.  I did look around the kitchen on my way out.  No need to sweep, but I am keeping an eye on it.  A clean home and a shower can make a man feel wealthy.  Wealth isn't what many think.  It's not money, it's not even gold or health.  Wealth is the luxury of living in an ordered world.  Those other things can be spent to create wealth, or this form of it.  Yet many sit on a pile of gold, in squalor.  Pigs in a sty, I suggest.  Not always can I be wealthy, but today it is so.  I enjoyed it, and will maintain it as well as I am able.

Today is another day of rest.  It is simply needed.  Or more, it isn't much of a choice.  Rest, and a day for it, as I have mentioned, is a gift.  What wears me out is, perhaps, not what will wear you out.  To some degree, perspective plays a part.  So be it.  I have worn myself well and truly these last few weeks.  Further, I am hoping to dig in again this coming week.  I would like to finish a few spots here in the house, then the garage, and get out shooting, hopefully twice this coming week.  Winter may well settle in before long.  Might as well take this good warm weather and use it while I can.  Then again, I am looking forward to snow as well.  Snowshoeing is on the menu.  Hmm, I should get my gear and proper attire sorted.  This time I am not going to fuss.  If I have it, it is ready enough, and the show is there... once I get the snow removed from the drive, it will be time for some backyard practice.  Once I am satisfied with that, I will begin getting out.  I suppose I should investigate trails, or common places, now.  You have to be a bit aware before going.  Some areas are avalanche prone.  Best to know the area, and research up-to-date conditions.

I may call my friend, actually, right after this post, and see whether tomorrow or the day after might be a good time to get out.  I need to do some minor shopping as well.  Milk and cream, though a few items for various dishes would be nice.  Quiche and a few other egg dishes are on my mind.  Cheese, maybe a few vegetables if they look good, spices and herbs, and such.  He may need to do some minor shopping too.  And we can always stop in to the local sporting good stores, just to... look and perhaps buy a few items of need or want.  Hmm... I may set up my Chrony tonight, as well, and take that with.  I'll also want to review the instructions, or more YouTube guides.  Whatever happened to clear, concise, instructions.  No, I haven't looked, though I have heard the instruction booklet is more pain than insightful.

I may yet tonight begin honing another blade.  It would be good to have two razors ready, save for stropping.  At this point, until the rest of the sharpening gear arrives, none of my blades are truly ready.  Close enough, one of them, for a rather rough shave.  It just needs a bit more honing than what I have on hand will do.  Yes, I am a noob.  But not the kind one my presuppose.  I know much that I couldn't, shouldn't, and technically don't, know.  I just... don't know it until I do.  I know these blades need more work.  Skill at shaving, which is one thing I lack, will allow for more tolerance with a blade.  As I said, that is one thing I lack.  I may even see if a local barber would sharpen one of my other blades, so I have a professional comparison.  Three blades at the ready would be even better.  As well, I may see if he offers any face sweetwater, for after shave.  Rosewater, lemon or lime, and a few others come to mind.  Though sniffing through the options can be fun, and lead to a surprise or three.  If I am going to bother to shave this way I might as well flaunt it a bit, nyet?

Oh, right, on to... a bit more resting.  I think I am going to be back into days, after this rest.  The brief slight twist of my day schedule was simply sheer exhaustion.  As I said, I could have awaken at 7:00 or so this morning.  It was merely that sleep was so perfect, and the opportunity was there so I took it.  Later.

Sleep was so very good.

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I don't know why.  I did a bit yesterday, and I think I am about recovered from the great fall push of '14.  *grins*  Perhaps starting up some of the medicine has helped.  I know I have dropped between twenty and forty pounds of water weight since starting back up some of it.  *splash*  I felt like a little boy after drinking two sodas.  Two sodas!  Yes.  I remind, when I was preteen, my body had grown much faster than my internals, so drinking just what was needed was difficult for my body to regulate, extra was tough.  I have been in the bathroom constantly the last few days.  Odd though, sometimes my legs and feet would fill, sometimes they wouldn't, over the two weeks of no medicine.  Anyway, that has been tended.  Now to start on some of the rest of it.  Half doses, and just at night for a week, or two, then into the days.  That's as much as I am going to take from now on.  That stuff was beating me up far too bad, at least this summer.

I dreamed last night.  Puzzle solving as a child.  I remember it, now, like never before.  I saw, and solved, puzzles that no one else saw, or understood.  This infuriated folk.  I couldn't explain it to them.  Sometimes I couldn't relate to people, sometimes I couldn't get them to understand.  They wanted me to "do something", but I was busy contemplating the problems before me.  Yes, great frustration.  I was solving natural problems around me and they just wanted me to rake, or do number charts, or read some rubbish or other that had already been solved and dismissed as what it was.  I remembered one of the problems I had solved.  I had to ignore all around me to do it, and was punished by the world for it.  I didn't care.  Eventually I came around, a bit, to add more application to life, that the world wants, but never gave up my... problem solving.  I must have been pseudo-autistic, or nearing idiot-savant perhaps.  It was when I was quite young, up to the age of seven I would guess.  As I said, I didn't talk until I was four, but then spoke as an adult.  I didn't like doing things unless I could do them whole and correct.  Speaking was just one of those things.  The world doesn't like that.  My mother, actually, was as patient as was possible, the rest of the world not so much.

The dream wasn't terrible.  I just realized some things through it.  Things I have wondered, but wasn't sure until seen through this lens.  I'm still not completely sure, I don't have the diagnostic knowledge, only informal information.  Then again, professionals often are lousy at diagnosis, let alone defining... conditions.  I saw clearly through the eyes of my child mind, but with what I know.  It was as I roughly remembered, but in detail that could not be simply remembered, on into the function.  They called it stubborn, or willful, they didn't realize that it was simply complete engagement with things and ideas they could not, or saw no reason, to engage.  As I said, I remember contemplating infinity at five or so, and onward.  My contemplations have not ended.  It still frustrates others, even the realist in myself, at times.  I have learned, mostly, how to put such notions on the back burner and function otherwise more consciously... mostly.

But the sleep!  Oh, wondrous!  I woke several times.  I think I needed to use the restroom, at least once.  Until my body fluid is drained fully, I will do that.  Then I'll be back to sleeping full nights.  But that doesn't seem to have been a problem.  I still slept quite well, went back to sleep easily.  I woke a few times this morning.  I could have waken at 7:00 or 8:00, but decided to just enjoy sleep.  It was absolutely delicious.  I thought about letting the girls in, to help wake me, but decided against.  Just one day of not fighting to wake up, especially when sleep was so very fine.  This is the type of sleep one fantasizes about, or I do.  Not as uncommon, for me, as it used to be.  But still a bit of a rare treat.

Today?  I simply don't know.  Trash, and maybe recycling out, if it's a day for both.  Cat litter change.  I am going to simply do a complete change of that, one at a time, washing the litter pans as I go.  Perhaps breakfast first.  A couple of eggs and sausage.  Nothing fancy, or heavy.  I am beginning to make fairly small, simple, meals.  Trying to do that more often.  Breakfast is a focal point, and dinner though today is a meal day.  Even two squares a day is good.  If I could upgrade to three...  I don't know.  That might be too much food for my body to digest.  Some days, digesting one meal is a bit much.  Some things people who are healthy don't understand is how much work their body has to do to digest food, process fluids, and such.  My body can't always do that much.  It just sits.  Bleh.

Well... on to my day.  Later.