Nearing the end of the book of books.

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It has been an interesting read.  The notions near the end have been heard before, contemplated on my own, at least so far.  Things like, when nearing a black hole, or such phenomena, time and proximity close in... or that for every x there is an x' or x-not, and probably more as in points on the positive and negative x,y, and z axis, only perhaps with time and possibly some other... dimensions, spaces, or elements.  Yeah, you... might not think about such things.  Fair enough.  But I really do, and have for a great deal of time.  No, not scientifically.  If for no other reason than science no more studies these things than it studies God.  Scientists may, or may not, believe in these things.  But, depending on which way the winds are blowing at any particular time, to enter the hallowed union halls of science, only those who believe whatever the prevailing winds prescribe may take up the mantel of being a knower.  Once in, to a very small degree, they may agree that they know little, far less than they preach, and what they preach is more likely wrong than right, but that... is another set of matters.  No, but I have contemplated these things.  I am, often, agnostic about any particular notion.  At times I may sway one way or another, and there are some I fancy more than others.  Evidence and notion, as well as emotion, swaying my fancy. 

Also, however, in the books within the book, certainly as I near the end, some notions of what I have discussed here.  About myself, about God, about the horrors of darkness, even nephilim are noticed and discussed lightly.  Hmm, there was that one that appeared in the last book, but from afar to the character, mostly.  There are things in this last of the books that certainly... seem familiar.  Amazing to see writers who have seen what I have seen, if only, possibly, from the point of fiction.  I wonder how they would feel to see some of these things in their dreams, as truths?  Stories.  Just stories.  Or so some require so as not to frighten the children.  How often does a mother wish to hear no more, for the children's sake, when the children aren't at risk?  Ah, yes.  It depends upon the audience.  I make none visit.  And yet they visit and hate.  Interesting.  Wait until they cannot hide behind the ether of electrons, and must face their fears, fears they have ignored and attempted to quiet through quieting those who speak them, those with whom they disagree because they cannot handle the truth.  That will be the first of their hells.  The rest will depend upon what they did to hide that truth... what evils... what corruptions... to themselves and to others.  Hell hath no fury as... well... hell.  A scorned woman is but a mere kitten.  I should know, on both accounts.

Loverly.  Still, it does bow a great deal to science fantasy to which, quite often, I no longer fancy.  I have doubts about black holes.  I am positive their notion of them is as their notion of unclean spirits that at one time they demanded be bled.  If they would discard their hubris and entertain the mantel of the studious, the curious, and blind and humble, I could abide them.  And entertain their notions with a some belief, or minor trust in their efforts.  Time will fix this.  The end is not nigh, not of man.  But the end of the fiction of the wealth we have known is coming to a very quick and sharp close.  Everyone is trying to give away what ceases, but never really in the first place, exists in order to buck for power while others are grabbing at every leaf as if it was gold or gold itself as if that would save them.  Some, perhaps many, of us, are merely hunkering down and in for what is promised to be a long bumpy road, the end of which we most likely will not see, nor will our children or grandchildren... or theirs.  We have, collective, bought real things with unreal monies, burning through real resources for nothing of substance.  How valuable is your smartphone?  The day you bought it?  The day after?  A year later?  Three years later?  I tell it is as valuable today as the day you bought it.  Which should tell you more about money, and men, than cellphones.

Never mind.  I'll go back to reading and let you wet your skivvies in fury or fear, or laugh with or at me.  Makes no difference to me.  Not one iota.  You will learn these truths, and in a way there is no means of escaping.  Which will force you to grow up.  After going to your knees if you do not know this place.  Unless you die first.  That has already been covered.  Best to learn, here and now.  Don't waste the opportunity.  Suffering is your, perhaps, only hope.  As it was mine.  Later.

Cheer up!  I've only got a couple of decades, or four, unless one of you... breaks the seal.  Double yum!