Such... music.

.

.

And her.  Is she haunting me, or am I... thinking too hard.

Some songs, from old.  I remember them, her, us... we.  We... didn't marry, but we certainly enjoined.  Similar, dark, hungry, thirsty.  Naughty?  If... you must, but that never was the point.  Love?  Aspects of it, at various times, in various measures.  She refused it for... for reasons.  I sought it blindly, if mildly.

Dark were our ways.  Similar were our natures.  What were those lyrics, from even a different song?  Something about enjoying this, or taking this, in... doses large enough to kill?  We... both wanted to kill, and die... in love.  We played a dangerous, delicate, delightful game.  No bruises, perhaps some poisoning, but she wasn't good at it, or I just die so poorly even pros can't get the deed done, or then?

Yes, music.

Sure, I've used this for another.  Recently.  Don't... be jealous.  *grins*

We were, often, obverse mirrors.  I think she played ignorant, but wasn't.

Her advances proved otherwise.  She was that kind of girl, just... not that that kind of girl?  I sure enjoyed our times.  Like I said, no cuts, burns, bruises, or else.  Just harsh looks, hissy fits, not speaking, and... other... things.  What a little joy.

This song?  Well, it's not...  I just liked it.  There are singers I won't ever offer a chance again.  All of their stuff is terrible.  Or most of it.  I might still have a song or two, from them, some of them.  But, with this woman?  She has so many I like, love.  And... something about her.  I... still haven't sorted this song, and was sure I wouldn't like it.  But... I do.  I'm... letting my subconscience sort it, as I enjoy it.  Eventually I'll look up the lyrics.  Not... today.

Oh, but it's not her body, or looks.  For the most part, I wouldn't touch a songstress.  Same reason most women shouldn't date male band members.  Just... the way of things.  And, I don't trust what any woman "looks" like these days.  From surgery to make-up techniques, to wigs to...  I more trust a woman's hair color than her looks, and I doubt if I have seen a natural hair color on a woman in... a long time.  Certainly none in my even near peer age group or older.

And, this one?

This is something... that... just... was a common thread for us.  Dark?  Aye, but...  If for each of us, for different reasons, if those different reasons may have had more common originating threads than suspected.  No one, not even the originator, always wants to see the full depths of all truths.  Thus God?  I... suspect so.

But... He, at least now, understands, even women, in very deep ways.

Amen.

It's not naughty.  For women.  Neurotic.  A plea for perfection, in and of themselves.  A feeling of failure, no matter how much was spent... on themselves, their families, their husband, their God.  Christ knew better, but took it for us all.  Yea.  Okay.  Anyway... there.  Can... finally get it off my mind, chest, shoulders.  Atlas must shrug, now and again.  Sometimes these things crawl in and... I can't think through them without putting them here.  Done!  I keep expecting to hear the chime of a typewriter carriage being returned.  Too bad Michael is gone, he... would understand.