Bah!

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Never did get to sleep.  Just... couldn't, didn't, wouldn't?  No, I would have.  It... just... didn't come together.

On the good side, I wrote my old friend again.  I'm... never sure if my friends are mad at me, if they are my friends, if...  Yes, I... share some... feminine traits.  Neurosis of the brain.  Not... to their level or ability.  And, more because I live so very solo.  So, I... fill in for the missing woman of the house, sometimes.

Anyway, I wrote, again.  And finally got him to write back.  Not... ill, or angry.  Not dead, obviously.  A lot on his mind, and he is... busy too.  For him it is work, and other things?  Health concerns, weight gain, issues.  I've been there, done that.  Still, was good to hear from him.  And, his musical interests surprised me.  He... found, and liked, a song that was old for me, but a favored.  Very... surprised, impressed almost.

It's always a relief, when one of the young ones yelps back.  So I know things are... if not perfect at least still going.  He's up to 300, I have been up to 380.  I'm trying to give him advice, to get him closer to where I am now.  If I had know carnivore was so good, and actually affordable with a little bit of attention given to sales, I would have been a lot thinner a long time ago.  But... you... can't tell people... until they are ready to hear.  I... get that.

Plus, like some other of my people, he isn't absolutely all that happy with the idea of me moving overseas.  Oh, I get the fear.  For me.  Those places can swallow armies.  So one even larger, but older ill man?  The world is dangerous.  But, then, so is the world right where I live.  Family, friends?  Can be dangerous, given half a chance.  Politics, money, other things.  Dangerous.  The whole world, and parts inbetween.

Though, too... I think the draw?  And revulsion at risk.  I've been more of a risk taker than I should have been.  Sometimes falling from dizzying heights, just to... see.  Then God... sort of got involved.  Challenged me, and my ways.  And won.  Even so, even now, risks aren't... the same for you and me.  If you can't keep up, don't step up.  Though, I do wonder... if I make it there?  If I might not end up with a friend or two on my coattails.  I can only help set them up.  Not guarantees in this life.  Well, and if they hit bottom, offer a couch... for a short bit.  Or ask for a couch.  Ugh.  Life is funny that way.

Well... on to something.  Got chilly, so I made coffee.  It is only to 44 out there, but the cool is creeping in.  Though... I didn't eat yesterday, not much.  And, as I wind down, I can get cold even when it's in the upper 70s.  All good.  Goodnight, or eventually.  And good morning.  Hop to it, Hopsing.