Been awake a goodly while.

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Reviewing what has been reviewed, looking through mostly old video pops, the morning routine of fatted coffee, cod liver oil, and bitters, then just drifted doing the other things.  Got lost in the flood of posts and vids flooding my feeds.  Almost a thousand visitors, though probably more as many aren't visible.  Good jobs, kid.  Stay in the shadows.  Wise.

I think I was up around five?  Maybe just a tiny bit after.  It's already early afternoon, and am just remembering to post.

I called my mother a bit ago.  Her phone is a mess.  A .gov phone.  Doesn't work well, no reception, doesn't always ring through, fades while talking.  I guess you have to be black for it to work?  Or... maybe none of them actually work, it's just a handout to cronies, as free money business deals.  Or there is corruption in the program.

Still, we were able, this time, for the first time in weeks, to talk.  She fell, not long ago.  Bruised her ribs, by the sound of it.  Perhaps some cracks.  She's... like me.  Lucky for the bad luck, or with it?  Within having a lot of bad luck, so far nothing too terrible.  She's in her 80's now.  And a big girl.  Lifelong smoker, if she has changed to e-cigarettes for whatever that does.  Though she may have quit even that?  Still, she has... held up, so far, against some rather harsh falls.  Pray for her, if you would.  If you hate me, pray against me.  She... isn't... a good target.  Or... whatever.  Hate is what it is.

I let her know I'll try to get a phone set up and going for her.  I've having trouble, lately, getting out.  But I have a few nickels to rub together, for the moment.  So I told her I would try to get my brother to do the running, if I do the spending.  

So, after talking to her, I called my brother.  Had a heck of a time talking to him.  But... when people don't want to talk, that can be difficult.  Still, I let him know what I needed.  He tried to weasel out, saying he couldn't spend anything.  Which... I had already said wasn't required.  But that didn't stop him from trying to wriggle out of doing anything.

I just want him to look over the phones, make a choice, set it up, and get it sent (or send it himself) to our mother.  Whatever his issue, or other issues, it seems like money is a problem.  I won't... even speculate as to why.  He makes double what I make, his wife probably makes at or double what he makes.  Their kids are grown, if one is half through college, going junior to four year though.  Somewhere they are spilling cash.  Thankfully, I don't think it's drugs or gambling.

Still, I guess I don't have much empathy or patience with that.  I just don't.  Especially it being the poor son paying on top.  He said he'd think about it, do what he can, if/when he could.  I gave him a time frame, a week to two weeks out.  We'll see.  For now, talking to mother is like pulling hair.  WHEN it rings through, IF she answers then.  Ugh.  Hopefully this will help.  IF he will lift his little pinky while I pay for it all.  Bah!

Tea this afternoon.  I like mixing.  Herbs, teas, florals.  My favored is a mix of marigold, hibiscus, and chamomile... then sometimes with either white, green, oolong, or a green and oolong teas mix.  No sweetener needed, but, sometimes, a single drop of the stuff.

I missed meds yesterday, all of them?  I think so.  But, have started wearing heavy compression for most of the day.  I'm trying to keep something on for sixteen to twenty hours a day.  I think that will help the wound.  Especially if I keep up on medicine, the waterpills especially but really all of it.  The better the heart does, the better the circulation, the better the water removal process.

I'm nearly fully back into the game.  One major wound left, and the side bruise.  Fasting, or 500 calories a day roughly, has helped that reduce, but has starved the wound healing process.  With the bruise being very small now, it's time to start eating.  The thing is, from eating so little, I am weakened.  Always... a trick, trap, problem, solution that interferes one with the other, and so on.

Still, I'm trying to keep at it.  I just need to figure out how to get enough food to eat in order to stand, so as to begin cooking again.  Even a meal every other day, with 'trash' foods to just get me through.  But that will take a trip somewhere.  Ugh.  I... may see if someone might help with that, as I am sort of stuck.  Which... is why I called my brother to sort out a phone.  Gah!

Damn but that rabbit hole gets deep before I realize it.  I'll keep at it, keep trying, and such.  And, if need be, try to be in order, next month, to get a phone for my mother.  If you have to do it all, do it.  I... won't begrudge my brother.  Maybe he has found a deeper pit of muck than even I know.  Bleh.  Lucky bastard.  :)

Yes.  I'll call.  Not sure if it's possible, but possible.  See if I can get some food delivered.  Later.