No, but I tried.

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I just can't get going.  Tomorrow.  If I am alive.  Probably be up later.  Just not for long.  Sleep is double cyclical, meaning I sleep twice a day, and hope for... a while longer up at some point, to get something done, anything.  Even just sitting for a while.

I've been sitting here, but mostly asleep.  No way could I even drive in, let alone a four hour gig, then a drive home.  Well, and I'd have to shower first.

Dreams of war.  Oddly, while... nearly being awake through this early afternoon.  It must be the heat, though the oppressive nature of what else is wrong sort of sends me to that zone.  Oh, course I was never at war, in the way soldiers have been.  But I have fought more than most soldiers do, started far younger.

The things I have done, been through, escaped, faced, survived.  The world wants you broken, submissive, to know your place.  If you are strong enough, you can get past that.  But the price is steep.  You will always be on your own, and you won't fit in as a tool for the social.  There are other things, including always feeling the herd animals trying to push you, oppress you, as a group.  Won't do it along, individually.  Will try to wear you down en masse.  Only affects me when I am down, and like a herd dog, a bark reminds them why not.

The lungs... it's a bit difficult to breath.  And the heart just feels... light.  Could be dying, I just don't think so.  No worries even so.  I have lived well past my time.  So far beyond it is sort of freakish at this point.  It's the most advanced portion of freakishness remaining to me.  Can't hide it.

Yes, on to bed.  I'd best get medicine in first.  Have I been missing it lately?  That can oppress too.  Goodnight, again, for a while.