Monday, January 17, 2022

Finally!

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Trash and recycling out.  Litter changed and the old with it!  Oh... been... wanting this done for a while.  So tired, confused, out of sorts.  But, finally, done!  The girls will be happy, if I keep all else in check.  Food has been good, water has been sorted.  But litter fell behind and stayed terrible for a while.  Done!  It is, and has been, about 8 F out there from the time I woke or nearabouts then, to now.  Not bad, with the heat up, and having done a bit of work with litter then trash and recycle collecting.  Refreshing, after that, given my general medical lethargy of late.

Trash didn't really fall behind, so much as... was left unattended.  There was a bag, in one of the bins.  But the others were without.  Things piled up, rather than getting put in the bin...  No, I won't let that happen again, either.  I will, shortly, bag all of the bins, cans, or whatever you might call them, whatever their size.  Not again.  Or... not soon.

Plus, the trash and recycling was taken to the curb.  I don't know if it is recycling day, but it is out just in case.  No worries, if not.  There is room for two or three more bags.  So... does that mean the recycling bin is half full... or half empty.  AND... whichever it is?  Is... that a good, or bad, thing?  :)  Shut up!  Right.  Right.

The girls have been fed.  I have been fed.  I looked over the kefir.  I want to let it go longer.  I want to see at least one of them break curds and whey.  I want to see more action.  The bottle of kefir was finished, to my mind, double fermenting.  So it did go into the fridge.  The first one, which was only ever half full... or... half empty... is about a quarter full.  But I have been sparing in how much I consume, until I could get the process into fuller swing.  Until I have a third bottle brewing, I'm still going to be slightly easy on the throttle.  

Still, one or two eight ouncers a day has been happy.  I really like that stuff.  Can't wait to get fruit back into the house, freezer really.  Adding egg whites, protein powder, kefir, fruit, and a few drops of sweetener?  Yeah.  If more so in the summer.  Have that for the main meal in the hottest part of the day.  It's good to have back.  I tried the storebought, both as a starter and just to taste.  It sure is creamier, but theirs had so many carbs!  Ugh... couldn't quite tell what all that was coming from, but it wasn't even just the normal carbs in milk.  There was a lot added.  But... through various side means, it wasn't direct, as in sugar or anything else I could directly see.  Terrible for diabetes.  And... that was supposed to be a good brand.

I initially thought they had simply labeled that many carbs because that is how much was in it initially.  Nope.  It is how much, minimally, was in the final product.  It suggested, say, 30 grams of carbs per cup?  half a cup?  But it spiked my blood sugar well over a hundred points.  Nothing else I ate that day would do it.  Some of what I eat, while it will raise blood sugar short term, it lowers it in the end.

Speaking of which.... blood sugar was 172 fasting.  So... I took my slow acting... which had been forgotten last night.  Then, had breakfast and a fatted coffee.  Blood sugar dropped to 69?  That... doesn't even make sense.  And, no, I definitely forgot slow acting last night.  I didn't confuse slow with fast.  I didn't take any fast... wanted to see what this would do, if anything.  Does not make sense.  

I'll... just... keep checking, watching.  But... I should eat something to try to bring that up.  I don't feel ill, I just know that is too low.  But... what to eat?  Ah... potato.  Well, and grill some chops.  I have a pack of four, thin, which don't come quite to a pound total.  So... two and a potato.  That... should work.  Sure wish I had sour cream though.  So... hungry.  So... very hungry.  Terribly hungry.  Don't think it is physical, just in the mind.  The cold, I think, plays tricks on my mind.

Well... food.  Then chores.  Laundry?  Dishes?  Cleaning in the kitchen?  Boxes?  If I can stand, and push, a bit of all of it?  If you would kindly say even a small prayer for my ability to work?  I'll gladly, if as usual, give all glory for even these little things to God.  As... that is where it all belongs.  Trade?  Oh, no worries, I'll pray too.  Not... just for this, but in part.  I like speaking to God at various times in the day, troubled or not, for your benefit or mine, in gratitude, thanksgiving, or just to say hello.  Even to pass on good news.  Sure, He knows.  But He loves to share in the lives of the little ones.  He truly does.

On to it... I think I'll grill those chops.  Yes.  Later.

A bit past one.

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Up right at 01:00, which is a good thing.  I wanted to slow the push through to days down a bit.  Do a controlled approach, rather than crashing on through for another spin.  This might work.  I keep missing medicine, though.  Still, I'll... keep trying.  I missed slow acting insulin last night, but this time I knew it.  However, upstairs, in bed, when it hit me, there was literally nothing I could do.

Oh, I did try to get out of bed.  I couldn't even sit up.  I tried until I woke much later and realized I had failed.  What a gig.  No, I didn't even try later on.  The realization of missing meds and not being able to get up just passed over me, as I laid there nearly completely crippled, then passed and allowed me to sleep again.

It's deep winter, and feels it.  It is dark, there is an edge to the cold, fog and overcast the last two days, deeply.  Frosting the world thickly, enough to pseudo snow from what was left frozen to everything.  Beautiful, terrible, though not dangerous... unless one was stuck in it, without the right clothing.  In the mid teens, from what I remember reading yesterday.  But, there is something oppressive about the weather these last days.  Ominous, dangerous, mysterious, disincentivizing.

Today?  First thing, trash and recycling.  Ugh, but that just hasn't been done.  I want it done, and out, and maybe to the curb.  It hasn't been a rough few days, it's been a rough week.  Getting to anything has been almost too much.  I did get kefir going.  That shouldn't have been difficult, but it was murder.  A good thing though, it creates a food I can eat, from a food I shouldn't eat.  And... is a good side hobby/hustle.  Plus, it helps keep a dairyman and his good wife in business.

If I can get out, I'll get another gallon of milk though.  And a sour cream.  Their sour cream is to die for.  And, while I love their milk straight, I just can't do it these days.  Perhaps never should have?  Some say milk shouldn't be consumed by cats, or humans.  I don't know, I just know I can't do it now.  But as kefir?  Or yogurt if I could go that way?  I think so.  I still get a cup a week, or two.  And try to remember to offer Sam some.  She really loves that stuff, she's a daddy's girl that way for sure.

Trash, recycling, litter, and a shower.  Oh, sure, I have been showering a bit lately, but gotta keep up.  Love showers, anyway.  Kings of old only dreamed of such.  The best they had was washing in their own dirty water, of moderate warmth... or showering in cold waterfalls.  No, we have it good in ways you cannot even imagine.  They didn't even have law.  They were the law, until someone could kill them or beat them in war.  Might made right in the days of kings, and that went from top to bottom... and sometimes right back up again.  Though it looks like it is going back to the old ways.  Though, the boomerang effect (even if boomerangs don't really come back) has a way of... fixing things.  Not always toward the good, but... whatever.

Food?  Not quite yet?  Hmm...  I think I will get in a slow acting, have a chia breakfast with protein additives of at least one sort.  The girls don't get to eat until three hours after I wake, otherwise they raise hell trying to wake me, earlier and earlier.  This was an experiment, with them, that actually worked well.

I have been waking with severe pains, twice these last four or five days.  I keep thinking I will be waking into a horrible day, but it hasn't materialized.  I do, however, really need to get back on track with food, insulin, and medicine.  I am trying, but something is just wrong.  It isn't a matter of a lack of interest, or will, I am failing, a bit.  If you can't stand, you aren't going to run.  If you figure out how to run, somehow, you can't run far, or for long.  I keep doing the impossible, but the impossible has costs.  Those costs make, sometimes, even the possible impossible.  Odd how that works.

Well... on to breakfast and some webbing.  Good morning, night, and day.

Sunday, January 16, 2022

Kefir finally well into production.

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I still can't get the grains some people show, or like what I receive.  Perhaps you have to use smaller vessels to both get those to grow as such, and to be able to find them?  Dunno.  But, it does replicate, I just don't have big flowery kefir grains.  And, if I keep the heat between 70 and 78, with a bit of time at each temp, the jars and bottle sours in twenty four hours. or so.  If I often try to give it more time.

I have started putting the finished kefir into the milk jugs, and labeling those to sort of keep better track.  When the drinkable goes back into the fermenting jars, then it is far too easy to lose track of what is where.  While I would prefer all glass, this will do, and just have to do.  

The first bottle was only half full, but had double fermented and was ready to go to the fridge.  I only had two jars fermenting, at that time.  Now I have three, and today I was able to get nearly a full gallon of kefir.  Which is now double fermenting, to be refrigerated tomorrow.  I am doing one more batch, then may actually cut back to two jars fermenting, but put those in the fridge, until I get through one of the gallon bottles... which are what the milk arrived in.

I, tomorrow, will end up with three bottles of kefir.  And, when refilling the jars, for first fermenting, I will put those in the fridge and let them ferment more slowly.  I'll just have to see how fast that all goes.  This is a new process.  And, I will stop using one of the jars, and wash it out.  Simply having enough room in the fridge is a limiting factor, and I have as much kefir as I could use for a goodly while.

So, back in kefir well, though, I will begin consuming it a lot more.  Can't start until tomorrow though.  As the kefir that is in the fridge needs a day to cool, though might try a sip this evening.  And the other one will take a day after that.  Plus, the one I make tomorrow, will have to sit out another day in order to double ferment.  Why double?  It keeps the carbs very low, makes it so I can almost consume this stuff at will, as much as I want.

Given how much juggling I do with kefir, I don't think I am going to bother with yogurt or that other one I had been considering.  Even water kefir is a bit much to add to this.  Now, if I was ever able, and got two refrigerators?  Yea, I might use a small one just for these food projects, and keep the main one for regular foods.  There just isn't room, as is, especially with half gallon and gallon jars in play, multiples, plus milk and cream of other things... then on top of that, meat, cheese, and veggies.  Pushing it.  Still, I love being back in kefir.  It is worth the hassle.

Having a high protein fatted coffee.  An odd thing, I am sure.  But, if I can get two or three thin chops in shortly, and maybe one more protein drink... probably a tea as I don't need any more fat, I might well hit two hundred protein.  Which is my actual goal.  I would rather eat it, but fat is a problem even with meats.  Or taste.  Lean meats... I can't eat enough of them to get my protein from them.  I need the fat.

I am currently using an animal based protein powder.  I may check out a vegetable (pea based) protein powder.  Just to mix it up.  I looked at premixed, but those are terribly expensive for what you get, compared to even this actually decent powder.  But you have to look over them carefully.  Don't just go by gurus, they may well sell you out for a nickel or dime.  Surprising how cheap some whore are.

Though, I may look more locally.  See what I can see, see if prices are better.  But, generally, amazon runs prices and pricing.  If they do anything, they match amazon.  They, if that has changed a bit, from time to time (serious scalping on some things), are still generally the price to beat, or match.  Difficult to get interested in going out looking, when you probably aren't going to beat them... let alone get it delivered.

Anyway...  A good start.  Now to get set up to get to chores.  I kept waiting for the sun to come up.  It did, but it sure doesn't look like it.  Dark, out there.  Foggy, frosty, cold, and sort of a mean winter day.  No wind, but... I don't think it needs it.  It'll kill you if you aren't careful.  Though, not quite sure how cold it really is out there.  Looks ugly cold though.  Later.

Bacon and eggs, nice.

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Two days in a row, but... not bad.  This time scrambled.  Okay, one point, next time I will crack the eggs separately, and more carefully.  I ended up with shell in it, and that is... really off-putting.  Well, and I won't add egg whites, to regular eggs, then scramble.  So absolutely plain.  I even added plenty of hot spice.  But the nothingness of egg white blotted out all my spice and herb and heat.  Bleh.  And I couldn't get close to eating it all.  I probably only was able to eat two thirds of the meal.  All the bacon though!

Yea, egg whites will only be added to drinks.  Not a bad thing.  I was just hoping they could be fried too.  Not so much.

Next?  I'm not sure.  The meats I was thawing simply aren't thawing!  I'll have to pull them from the fridge, in parts, and thaw out a few packs at a time.  At least this way I won't end up with too much thawed meat all at once?  I could have a taco salad.  Down to the last one or two.  Or, maybe, spaghetti but with the ugly noodles (if carb free).  But, first, a fatted coffee with more egg whites and protein powder, to make up for what I failed to be able to eat.  So absolutely white-out boring.  Could not eat it.

Then, to get ready and out for chores.  I just need something warm, down, in, first.  Oh... the funny thing?  When blood sugar was high, and after the pizza?  I had no problem with warmth.  Now that blood sugar is down, I am freezing!  It really is a food thing.  If you want to like summers, and want to know how to tolerate the heat?  Stay away from sugar, starches, breads, and all such things.  Stay with fats and proteins.  Sucks in the winter, but at this time I don't have a choice.

Oh, weird but...  After dosing, mildly considering (25 cc's, but with a 225 blood sugar), and taking slow acting because I missed it last night, blood sugar is now 72.  So... beyond needing to warm, before chores, I really need to pump that up a bit.  I'm not feeling bad, it's not crashing.  But it is a bit low.  Partly why I am freezing.  So... yeah.  So very strange.  Shouldn't have dropped so much though.  Ugh.  Always a bit fritzy as I near better numbers.

Well... I best get going.  Later.

Awake at 03:00.

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Slowly getting back to days.  Trying to slow further progress in that direction.  A 05:00 wakeup, to me, is optimal.  Which would mean, with an eight hour sleep, 21:00 would be the optimal bedtime.  The problem is, some nights I sleep more like ten, or even twelve hours.  So, sometimes, going to be earlier would be better.  A trick I haven't mastered well, yet.  It seems, if I end up extra tired in a day, for whatever reason, I stay awake longer?  Right, I don't understand, but that's how it works.

I am not positive, but I think sleep was pure or pretty close to it last night.  I don't think I woke to pee, or only once, twice?  And, if I did, I really don't remember.  Which is unusual.  Very unusual.  I'll take it.  Would love to sleep clean through ever night if possible.

I've set the alarm for three hours, at which time I will feed the girls.  I hope to do a few things between then and now.  Trash and recycling weren't managed yesterday.  A good thing to do.  Which would also mean clearing cat litter, and starting over.  maybe a shower too.  As well, perhaps setting up waterers, for a morning first light chore duty.  Probably too much for that time, but can get started on a few things.

Oh, but I'll check kefir first thing.  If it's ready, I'll put the second ferment in the fridge, set up another dose of the stuff, then reset the rest for another run.  As is, I have three half-gallon runs going.  That is as much as I can do for now.  May need to get more milk before I can reset a fourth jar, if I do go that way.  I may need three gallons a week, until I get the production going, then just use two gallons for maintenance?  I'm not sure.  Depends on consumption, as well as end production... what I actually get out of what I am making.  There is some losses, due to some of it going to grains.  Though, even those can be eaten, and I am not squeamish about that at all.

The funny thing is, my mother would be rather surprised.  When I was a child, I... didn't like "weird things".  And she was such a farm girl!  She would try to get us to eat "weird things".  Then again, I thought pecan pie was a weird thing, so my limits were... rather solid.  As well, anything really mixed with too many ingredients.  Well, and caramel, because it was gooey and too sweet.  Even goulash, and meatloaf, and many casseroles, made me suspicious... didn't really like it because I didn't understand what was in it.  Then again, I really liked raw milk.  When I was a kid, that was available, but raw milk and such was considered poor people's food.  We were poor, for certain.  And I'll bet I would have liked homemade cottage cheese, even then.  An odd child, I suppose?  Or a typical sort of a certain type?

Well, on to breakfast.   I did a bad thing.  I had a friend bring half a pizza.  I was just... hungry.  So very hungry for pizza.  I failed.  Four pieces, but really half a large pizza.  He got the other half for delivery.  Besides, I owed him a meal... to my mind.  He was happy with all, but I felt... obligated.  So, done and done.  The best guesstimate of calories was about 920.  Which surprised me.  That is only about a double burger.  And only 40 carbs.  All bad carbs, but... seriously?  I would have thought it was 1,500 calories and 80 carbs.  Then again, I didn't have soda with it, so there was that.  You know... while totally not keto?  Half a pizza, stretched over two or three days?

I only write that last because, sometimes, I will go off the trail.  Just looking at a way to do it in which I don't actually completely abandon keto... as was done last night.  Since I had the steak, I was already pushing calories.  Had to have to steak, it was on the verge of going bad, and those are... too precious for me to let go.  The package got hidden behind the bacon.  Ugh.  So I pushed carbs and calories by a lot!  Still... it... happens.  But, yes, even two pieces would only be 20 carbs, and 460 calories.  So, yes, with restraint, I can have pizza.  I just don't want to very often.  Knowing helps schedule a better diet... rather than being a freaky feral sometimes overeater?  I'll still fail, from time to time, but knowing even bad food can be... managed... helps.

Oh, I had blood sugar to 101 before that.  After the steak even.  But, didn't dose with the pizza, and forgot slow acting insulin last night (I think).  Blood sugar is 215 fasting this morning.  Ugh... double ackh!  I'll... keep at it.  Now for breakfast.  I think bacon and eggs again this morning, with fatted protein coffee.  I may scramble eggs today, though.  And, add the egg whites to regular eggs, for the extra extra protein that way.  Yeah, I'll get slow acting in, and a shot of the fast stuff.

By the by, I used a high carbon pan for cooking yesterday.  It... actually worked pretty good.  Now, I used a bit of tallow, to get it lubed, wiped most of that out, then did bacon.  And finally fried eggs in it.  For the first time, that pan actually worked on my glass cooktop.  I have had great difficulties with it before.  And... whoever looked up that blog post, about the vid of that guy who said those don't work on flat cooktops?  Either you got lucky, or you are actually watching in here.  It's happened enough, with this and other things, that I suspect someone sees in here.  Whatevs.  Not worried about it, don't care.  Just... a thought.  Later.



Saturday, January 15, 2022

Bacon and eggs.

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Very good.  It's been a long time.  I planned on two pieces of bacon but... couldn't... stop there.  Three.  Oh well.  A bit more fat for the day, than goal, but I can live with that.  Now, a kefir, egg whites, and... I was going to add protein powder to it, but it just doesn't blend well in cold  stuff.  They say it will... perhaps if left overnight?  But just mixing... nah... clumps.  I'll have the powder with a later tea, minus anything else?  Maybe some sweetener.

Kefir and egg whites.  Sounds just awful, but it really isn't too bad.

And, one final taco salad.  I had thought about a keto spaghetti, but I just don't have a pot.  I'll get some of those, and pans, washed today.  Chores, though, and trash plus recycling first.  Yea.  Chores absolutely first, and within the hour.  I forgot to turn the heat up, though.  I'll turn that up, set an alarm for an half hour, then get to chores.  Trash as soon after as possible.  Litter, to go out with trash, and get reset.  Always something, and more.

Oh, and kefir and egg whites while warming the water and myself.  It's an odd food, but really does well.  It is about equal protein and fat, both low though for a cup, at 8 and 9 grams respectively.  But, all the good it does, and not being high carb at 4 grams per serving...  I really do enjoy it.  As well, it helps with general digestion.  And... can make at home without almost any fuss.

Well, better get to warming and eating.  Oh, having forgotten slow acting insulin last night, blood sugar was 177 fasting.  I meant to take slow acting, and some fast acting, insulin with breakfast but totally spaced it.  Bacon, eggs, and a fatted coffee caused a thirty point drop, to 147.  I'll... have some fast and slow acting with lunch.  If I remember.  *shakes head*  Later.

Waterers too.

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I must have lost track?  Well, and we had some warm days in there, when the rabbits could, and did, drink their waterers dry, rather than just getting a bit out before they froze.  All good, I would rather they drink a full lot, for their health and wellbeing.  I do like the furry critters, personally.  Still, that means I had to refill nearly all the waterers.  All good.  Now to  get them warmed before getting them out.  I need to get the furnace up a bit anyway.  I can't do a damn thing if it is too cold.

Before sunup, I am hoping to get trash and recycling rounded up and out.  I started a load of laundry, if because of a nose bleed and a drop on my favorite house jacket.  I'll find out shortly if blood comes out, at all, of the material.  It is synthetic, so there is some hope.  If not, oh well.

Having tea, waiting on breakfast.  I have the alarm set, for the girls.  I'll eat after them.  Breakfast?  I may see about fried eggs, bacon, and a fatted coffee.  It sounds heavy, but works well if I can get it.  Five eggs offer slightly more fat than protein, but are so good in every way.

Actually, while... thinking about it... I planned my whole day of food.  Leaning on egg whites and powder, I was able to keep fats to goal, just... keep carbs far below, and get just over 155 grams of protein in.  I'm not sure how sustainable that is.  I need to figure out other sources of protein.  But, for a starter, it's a good kick start.  Actually, I could have one of those pieces of keto bread, toasted and buttered, in with it.  A protein bread.  It mostly adds carbs, but few enough to still be in good shape.  And calories, but I'm not worried about calories.  Plus, it would make breakfast almost seem normal.  It's been a while.

Well, first, to finish waking up!  It does take a few hours, at least.  And some heat.  So... I'll turn that furnace up, and game for a bit.  Later.

Awake, at about 02:00.

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I think I went to bed at or a bit after 18:00?  Memory sucks, but it was in there close.  I was only up that late because of a low blood sugar.  Well, I got it up.  Then forgot the slow acting dose, and it shows this morning.  I'll take it now, I guess.  As well, I am delaying breakfast, again, finally.  Not quite keeping to intermittent fasting, but tightening up, and making plans.  It'll get there, again, soon.

Milk and cream should be arriving today.  As such, I can get back to shuffling kefir.  I have two I think I will just dump.  I tried to make it from the old stuff in the fridge.  And, to be honest, I just don't quite trust it.  Even if it mostly survived, anyway, I doubt if it has the full spectrum of yeast and else.  No, I'll stick to what I am sure of.

I now have plenty of jars, clean and ready.  And, after I clear these two I doubt, I should be able to cycle through at will... so long as I can keep up on milk.  Especially since I won't be using a fresh jar every switch.  Just changing over when they get too gunky.  Say, every third to fifth cycle?  And, really, I'd like to keep four in the cycle, and have one sort of in a permanent backup mode... giving the whole half gallon only a tablespoon of grains, the rest fresh milk, and keeping that in the fridge, exchanging it every two weeks to month.  Just in case I need backup, or a restart for any reason.

A shower, staring on more dishes... pots and pans actually.  Chores, when the sun comes up... around 08:00 or 09:00 is preferred.  Cats, trash, recycling... got to get that managed.  So much to do.  Hopefully I can get to it.  Oh, and checking the mail.  I need those meds.  Ugh.  So much to do, yet still so shut down.  I'll... give it all a go today.  Later.

Friday, January 14, 2022

Still awake.

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I did get chores done, right after the last post.  Happy to have that done.  While I was out, I lifted the hydrant lever, and just left it open while doing chores.  When I was finishing, it had started to flow.  When I put the bottles up, and came back, it was going full blast.  So I refilled the girls' water, and grabbed another bucket of fresh water.  It doesn't make sense, but... whatever, for now.

After that, I checked blood sugar.  It was 86?  That... doesn't even make sense.  On the good side, I have fewer doubts about kefir.  As I had kefir, protein powder, and egg whites... if with a dose.  But, blood sugar had been 156.  To be honest, I was almost sure kefir was causing a blood sugar spike.  I still need to test, but it seems I may have been wrong on that.  Being that blood sugar was that low, I had to have something else.

I am only awake to now, to check blood sugar again.  In about an half hour, I will check it.  If it is in the 90s, I'll take my nightly slow acting dose and go on to bed.  If it is is below 90, I'll eat something more, then do the rest of that routine.  I may just take a few glucose tabs.  Just, say, two.  Because I don't feel bad, I'm just not trusting lower numbers at bedtime.  This point in blood sugar management can be damned tricky, at least for me.  Sure, tell me not to mess up.  I... just can't keep that promise, especially if forced to push beyond nearly human capacity...  Someone in my condition not only shouldn't stay up nearly three days straight, someone in my condition shouldn't be able to do so, and still drive hundreds of miles.  Something had to give, and it did.  Self-control goes clean out the window.

Still, getting back to it.  Days are nearly back in play.  Eight hour sleeps are back as a general rule.  I started cleaning, if only jars.  Things are slowly being put back to order.  It's as good as I can do.  Plus, for my sacrifice, I am not only out of a monthly debt, I have a bit of a nestegg.  Oh, I should start requesting quotes for electrical repairs... main box replacement.  With the bit in savings, and two hundred of what had been going for the car, put into to that as well each month, by spring I should easily be able to get electric sorted.

Well, anyway... it's time for bed.  Good afternoon, day, and goodnight.

Still awake.

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Need to get to chores.  So tired though.  It has been difficult.  I did get to the jars.  They need to be washed, twice, with soap.  Then bleached.  And, finally, they were clean.  I rinsed them, in very hot water.  They are drying.  Kefir, left to die, or even while alive, is very difficult to get off glass.  Even if you just use a jar once or several times, then clean it.  That stuff sticks to the glass like... mineral deposits.  Perhaps more strongly.  Still, they are ready.  I won't buy milk, since tomorrow is Saturday, and milk should be arriving.

Chores.  Ugh!  I'll get to those right after this.

Blood sugar jumped to 156.  Strange.  Then again, I have lost track of what and when I am eating.  As I began failing to... be fully, mostly, awake... I just started eating.  Bits and parts, this and that.  I've seen it before, I just didn't think I was in that bad of shape.

Even so, I wanted to try something... to add protein.  I used two scoops of the protein powder, a cup of kefir, a cup of egg whites, and some sweetener... being careful how much was added.  The powder added both 20 grams of protein, and a powdered milk taste.  More mild than actual powdered milk, but that same idea.  Just... a taste, not the full bite.  I didn't mind it, especially for what I get out of it.  Those two things added 40 grams of protein to my diet.  Grams I desperately need.  I may end up needing two of those a day, assuming the kefir doesn't exacerbate diabetes.  

I tested before, it was 156.  I'll test again two hours later, or an hour and an half from now.  I did take insulin with it.  I am hoping to get diabetes in the clear, again, soon, so as to test kefir without a dose.  I suppose I could use this concoction as breakfast, some morning.  I could even use this twice, for breakfast and lunch, or as parts of those, so as to see it operate in various conditions, with and without other food, and such.  I don't quite trust it, mostly the kefir.  But, who knows.  Maybe the powder is a problem.  The egg whites aren't, haven't shown any sign of being so.

Well, on to chores.  Then I have to wait to test.  But, then, on to bed.  Good afternoon, day, and perhaps goodnight if I don't get back before bedtime.  On the good side, I am making it back into days.  If I can just hold it once I get here.  I am going to stop pushing from now on.  Just let it slide into home.  It'll drift a bit, on it's own.  The trick is to slow the drift.  Such a tricky thing.

A few starts.

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The jars are all set up, soaking.  The pee jugs too, sorted and drying.  The girls fed.  And myself fed, save one last meal.  I called, and contacted, my mother as well.  I was beginning to worry.  She did try to call back, but my phone was either off or the battery had died.  I... forget about it, sometimes.  Especially when I am out of sorts, as I have been lately.

She isn't feeling well, sleeping in today.  I would guess she is down for some count or other.  They are having something between a snowstorm and a blizzard out their way.  A foot, she says.  If there is any wind, whatever, they will have whiteout conditions quickly.  But, Iowans are used to snow, winter, cold, and all.  Though, as I told her, she couldn't be in a better place to ride it out.

I still haven't gotten to chores, but will, shortly.  Then, perhaps, a shower?  Ah, but I want to eat, first.  That and have a cup of hot tea.  I need to back off coffee for a while.  I've been drinking too much of it.  It's nice, and thick with the cream... even a tablespoon really adds some thick luxury.  But, tea... I... need to hit more tea.

Taco salad, again.  But I am enjoying it.  Tomorrow, perhaps, I'll make keto spaghetti.  Since I know I like the palm heart pasta, I will try to ugly type... the one made from roots either found, or developed first, in Japan.  They aren't, at all, my favorite.  But I am going to try them again, again.  Try to figure out how to make me like them.  These have absolutely no carbs.  Zero.  Nada.  Zilch.  And, for some things, will work better.  And for some times.

I haven't been out, but looking from the back door, I think, think I say, that it was 30 out there.  But sort of foggy, cloudy, not overcast, but yet... sort of?  Perhaps the inversion?  Ugh.  Sort of an ugly day.  But, if 30, not a bad one?  Well... I should get to supper.

Oh, blood sugar is finally managed.  It hit 103, after two meals, and a dose... or two?  It's being... odd.  Eating the same stuff.  Sometimes dropping like a rock, sometimes not dropping for nothing.  Still, I have to be careful.  I am definitely eating low carb... save for fiber in chia.  Less than fifteen carbs most days.  Anyway...  I'll keep at it.  Get it back under control.  Oh, but... pills... I keep missing those.  I thought I was on it, then a few days slip by without me noticing.  And I haven't gotten the new medicine, but it might be in?  Gotta check, soon... so under the bus though!  Ugh.  Later.

Midnight thirty.

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Well, that is when I am here, sitting at the machine.  I went to bed around 14:00, I think.  When I push things, memory becomes difficult.  Ah, I attempted to call my mother slightly before bedtime, that was 13:27.  So, yes, probably right at 14:00, maybe slightly after.  I probably meant to go to bed after calling my mother, but my world, and time, these days... slide.  Time isn't what it seems for me, currently.

A wonderful sleep.  Until I get some things back under control, it seems I am peeing a lot through the night.  I had it down to once or none a night.  Now it is three to four times a night.  It's been worse.  And I am not filling a pee jug every night, though every other night seems normal.  Very annoying.  I had that to filling a jug every three to five days, averaging four.  Cleaning pee jugs is just not a fun chore, especially when they pile up quickly.  Bleh.

Oh, the hydrant.  The handle does open and close, but water doesn't flow.  I'll... tinker with it, on a warmer day.  Then again, yesterday wasn't bad, at 30 out there when I checked, in the morning.  But a bit of a breeze.  Still, not too bad.  I just wasn't in shape to tinker, and had to think about what might be wrong.

I may try to pull the head, and extract the rod and plunge stopper.  But, first, I may check to see if the rod is fully attached to the plunge stopper.  That might be the problem.  As well, readjust the stopper depth.  To do the first suggested would require turning the water off.  These last two can be done without messing with the water shutoff.  I am just hoping I don't have to get a backhoe in and dig down again.  No way to hand dig that deep of a hole, really.  That is what equipment is for.  

How did they do it before machinery?  Sons.  Sons was how most hard work was done.  If pops could, he might as well, but mostly sons.  I have some, but... they aren't available.  And, at my age, it would be handed down to grandsons.  And, being what kids are these days, I doubt they have produced.  And if so, they aren't workers.  They want to sell financing in a climate controlled environment, and eat the world in doing so, rather than make or do anything real... assuming they are at all "successful" in this "modern" America.

Blood sugar is still a little high, at 140 fasting.  I will be watching very carefully, everything, going forward.  I am hoping kefir isn't the problem, but have a sinking feeling.  Even double brewed, the stuff may be simply too high in carbs?  It is suggested a cup is between four and eight carbs.  But that shouldn't be a problem.  That is standard, I double brew so would be on the low end of that.  Though, maybe, I haven't measured well?  In any case, I... will get to the bottom of the problem.  Maybe I was eating too much, recently, in all cases?  I just started logging yesterday, so...  And I have been out of sorts, still am.  So, yea, maybe.

I don't know.  I'll try to get things going.  Waterers refilled, maybe another shower, dishes going... after I get those jars washed out.  Though, technically, those ARE dishes, so.  Still, other dishes.  Pots and pans, to get eggs back into the menu system.  And to just have clean things around for general use.  I need more milk, too, to get kefir going.  Ugh, stuck, on that.  But will go with it, at least one more week, to see how it works out.

Oh, found something for a friend.  Not really my sort of games, but he had been wondering.  Not sure if his machine is coming in soon, or what.  But... this might wet his appetite for the machine and what to do with it.  You are welcome, I hope.  Though you probably look on your own.  Still, popped on my radar, I thought to pass it along.  Oh, but the one... Frostpunk... the second or whatever... that...  I am curious about that because if they are coming out with a second one, then the first must have been at least okay.  And I am curious about the first one already, doubly so now.

Thursday, January 13, 2022

A shower.

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Needed.  Wanted.  Finally gotten.  The good thing about being a guy is, if I fall, fail, and drop.  And I can't get to a shower in a while... I can make it.  I'd hate to be female, and fail.  They just aren't built to endure this.  I hate going without a shower for long.  Sometimes I simply have no choice.  Thankfully, these last few years, going without has been limited to days, maybe a week.  Then again, when it was longer, it was because I was sleeping for weeks, even to a month or so.  Pretty much the whole time.  Waking terribly hungry, sometimes I could eat.  But showering, bathing, just didn't happen.

Now to get to chores.  It is already 13:23.  I should have done it earlier, but I couldn't.  Having a heck of a time getting going.  Blood sugar is still, oddly, high.  Nothing I ate should be keeping it up.  And I took 20 cc's.  Just... playing a hunch.  That with a fatted coffee.  I hope kefir isn't a problem.  That was double fermented, too.  Hmm...  Will have to keep an eye on that.

I really want to get to chores, too.  Not just for the rabbits, though there is that.  But to check the hydrant, see if it is running.  Curiosity is killing me.  I'll get to it as soon as I can.  I thought the coffee would help, but no.  I'm crashing, so tired.  But I will get to chores soon.  I must.  Then to bed.

I'll give my mother a call.  See how she is doing.  Have a great day.

Rough.

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A bit achy, from sitting in the same position for too long for days.  Stuck.  Can't get back to things, yet.  Working on it.  Did get the hydrant thawed, at least enough to get water and work on it a bit yesterday.  Did start logging food again, today, and sorted some new foods for it.  I found and installed data sets for kefir, among other things.

Not much else.  I need to get to chores.  I want a shower first.  Ugh.  Need a shower.  I love those things.  Plus, they warm me up for the day, or sleep.  Not sure how much longer I can stay awake though.  A shower might help.  Maybe another fatted coffee?  I have enough calories, and technically fats.  It will take me up to the limit, but... yeah.  Some days...  Then again, I am on less than a 1,500 calorie diet.  Since the 1889, or such calorie diet wasn't working.  Though, too, I have messed up, bigly, lately...  so, yeah.  Start over, start where you can, and then get going again.

On the good side?  Even if weight isn't gone, my pj's, which fit for years, have become far too big!  I wasn't sure if it was just stretching out, somehow, or... something.  So I ordered mediums (urhm, American mediums... 36 to 38 waist).  And?  And they fit like a charm!  Of course, my belly seems pretty much still in place, so it actually looks worse.  But... these fit much better.  I don't constantly fear becoming a black guy.  Oh, and the real benefit?  The mediums cost half what the size I used to need cost.  Less than half, actually, by a little.  *grins*

Crap!  Blood sugar is up to 176?  I ate right foods, right portions, took a dose of fast acting earlier.  Oh well, I will take another, with the fatted coffee.  Perhaps too many doses of liquid sweetener?  Maybe I... used too much?  Still, have to be careful with the amount.  Say... 15 cc's?  Maybe 20, but that might be pushing it, after last night.  Yes, 15 cc's.  Then, later, slow acting.  

A coffee, a shower, then chores, then trying to stay awake later, as late as possible, up to midafternoon.  Good morning, day, and probably goodnight too.

Back to food logging.

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Well, I just wasn't able to keep up on things, everything.  Out of focus, lost, drifting.  Still am, but trying to latch onto a few things.  Logging food is one of them.

Just for today, can't remember what I ate yesterday.  Today I had chia, fatted coffee, taco salad with cheddar, and finally a cup of egg whites mixed with my homemade kefir... with a few drops of various sweeteners.  Not... bad.  I had hope to add berries.  But the ones I have in the freezer have that freezer burn smell.  Bleh.  So... I just went mostly raw.  May add cinnamon and some other spices.  Vanilla would be nice, too?

Not only did I log today, I am getting very close to hitting my targets.  Protein powder, in with the egg whites, and kefir, will make an excellent full finish for my needs.  It isn't really all that bad.  It's more the idea, than the fact.  And, with berries, fresh... or fresh frozen... I am quite sure this will be a delight.  I'll stay away from most frozen fruits, very high in sugars.  And, many of them have sugar added on top of it.  But some berries are frozen without being drenched in sugar, dextrose, corn syrup, or else.  If you look carefully.  If you don't know what an additive is, look it up.  Most people have smart phones right there with them, these days.  It'll find it for you.

It's like they are trying to charge someone for the sugar they should really be throwing away (or not producing).  But they produce it because the government subsidizes that.  So... they have to use it.  Industrialized farming coming to it's final conclusion... make people sick for industrialized medicine, then keep them sick for it and big pharma.  No one is on your side, or riding to your rescue.  They are just going to rob the government through you, until they can just go through your pockets for spare change when you die.

Anway...  Oh, and I may have made a rough round of intermittent fasting.  Definitely in the eight hour run, but more likely in the four the six hour window.  I have another hour for the six hour window, I am pretty sure, maybe two... but I am being conservative.  I just have to get the goop down in time.  I think I can.  Anyway...  Good morning and day.  Hopefully I can stay awake until 14:00 to 16:00 tonight.  Not sure, it's rough.  Later.

Better.

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Blood sugar is 128 after several meals and one dose of insulin.  An 89 point drop.  See, that is what I was discussing.  When diabetes is mostly under control, save an outlier event, or even series of events, but mostly good eating and attempts at medication go forth, then the seeming high numbers crumble easily.  So, if I try to dose as if diabetes were still totally out of control, and food was bad every day, all the time, then... I get in trouble, quickly.

I really do eat keto, low carb, very well now.  Fats are probably still too high, proteins too low as well.  But I am working on these things.  Calories?  I haven't been able to track, lately.  I'm just not... conscious, awake, aware, able.  I'm... trying to get back to it.  I really pushed, and it really costs me.  Will do what I can.

Gaming, mostly, lately.  Can't do well in even that.  Though, with this game, as with most Dark Souls type games, the devs cheat against players.  I almost beat the boss, the first one.  Should have.  I was nearly full health, the boss was on it's last tenth, then all of a sudden I couldn't hit him, he couldn't miss, and I was given no chance to heal or else.  Even my special combat skills refused to land, and they are supposed to be automatic hits.  So, yeah, the game is cheating.  So?  I... figured out how to cheat better.  Don't know if it will work, yet.  Will find out soon enough.  Assholes...

One more meal.  I have had chia, a fatted coffee, a cheese and deli roast beef sandwich, and a taco salad.  All good, really good.  Not sure what I can have for a last meal.  I keep thinking cat, the cats keep thinking not.  :)  The funny thing is, they know what I'm talking about when teasing about that.  And don't think it's all that funny.  Well, the youngest, Sassy, doesn't think it's funny.  Sam is just curious, if I eat Sassy, if she can get a 'wing' or drummy out of it.  :p  She is as bad as me, only... she is half serious.

Hmm, I may just go with a kefir, egg white, and berry smoothie.  Slightly sweetened with liquid stevia and that other one I use.  While stevia doesn't really sweeten?  To me?  It... somehow... helps the one I use, allowing me to use less, and avoiding blood sugar spikes.  It's... an odd thing, but works.  Liquid sucralose, is my main.  But, used itself enough to my tastes, it'll cause a spike.  I am down to two, usually, but up to six drops, allowed, a day.  And, was doing really well that way.  No more than two drops in any drink.  Though, oddly, if I cook it I don't get the spike.  Which I rarely do.  Just a note.  Very strange, but take em' where you can get em'.

I was nearly awake until midnight?  Definitely after 23:00.  I am trying to push days and nights back in order, then get things arranged.  But keep up on medicine is bogging down.  I... don't get it.  My whole will is aimed at that, but something broke recently.  Though it broke in high winter.  A tough time, season, to have a 'flat'.  Getting the spare on, and going, is a trick.  I'll keep at it.

Well, back to something or other.  Later.

Wednesday, January 12, 2022

Kefir is back on the menu, boys!

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Now, either you love, or hate, kefir.  Some may tolerate it, and learn to... accept it, for nutritional reasons?  I would like to say I couldn't do that.  But, cabbage and a dozen dozen other foods would call me a liar.  Still, with this, I am not sure it is possible?  Anyway, I... do love my kefir.  More so since I brew it myself.  From grains I trust, using raw milk, on my counter.

My first half gallon is ready.  It is not the best, in spite of being double fermented.  Not that it is bad, just that it isn't all that strong yet.  It will take a bit to get to the strength I like.  But it will get there.  Still, for now, it will happily do.  I am having a cup of the lovely stuff right this morning.  It was finished last night, to before bed I put it in to chill.  I can't quite wrap my bean around warm kefir.  Your mileage may vary.  Raw, today.  Though I can see adding egg whites, protein powder, and frozen berries, into a smoothie.  I have chocolate and unflavored powders arriving.  They were on a very good sale, and all other things checked.  Tasty?  Probably not.  Some of that will be up to me, as with egg whites.

Protein is the new name of the game.  Odd, how, when I finally sort out how much fat, for a traditional keto diet... and begin hitting the target fairly well?  I realize I need to change course.  Still, I think I'll get onto the new system before long.  My one concern, despite what some suggest, is protein based blood sugar spikes.  I'll... sort that out in time.  Some of it will have to do with how fast the protein uptake is, much like with sugars.  Everything has some sort of sugar or starch, or is a protein which can be used AS such.  My guess is, the more complex, the more difficult to pull the proteins in order to create glucose... insulin.  Can't be sure, and will have to try various protein sources.

Well, I made a mess of things again, with blood sugar.  It... does get messy, or can, as I restart.  Especially if I get impatient.  Too much fast acting insulin yesterday.  But the readings were over 200, so I thought 20 cc's would be fine.  Twice.  But, it seems, while blood sugars will go high, they are till prone to being brought down quickly.  Especially with slow acting now being added again.  I crashed a few hours after going to bed.  I had to gobble two and a half packs of glucose tabs, and some candy.  Ugh.

Today?  I want to get the jars cleaned.  The hydrant ate yesterday.  Hopefully to some use.  But, if nothing else, I did learn a few things.  If it is flowing, or not actually, on a warmer day if it is, I'd like to do a bit more tinkering with it.  I think the plunger is set too deep.  Over time, that will wear it too quickly.  It can be replaced, but... that... is a whole other and extra animal.  

Jars, trash and recycling set up, maybe put out, and something cooked, or set to thaw to be cooked.  Taco salad should work well, after this chia breakfast and kefir side.  Oh, and cat litter.  Probably a complete refresh.  I need to see about local cat food and litter prices.  It's a lot more work, but I think I am being ganked about that online.  Or... cat food has become nigh on unaffordable?  Same with litter.  Online just doubled prices, which were already a bit higher than local.  But delivery made the premium... premium.  But... not double premium.

A shower, today.  Gotta be.  Needed.  Wanted.  Even the cats let me know it's time.  Women!  If a critter that licks it's own butt turns up it's nose at you... yea...  :p  That, and maybe milk.  Or sometime this week.  A couple of jugs, to keep the kefir going.  But... I really have to get the other jars clean and ready.  That and milk are both bottlenecks currently.  So, I gotta do it.

Later.

Not going to make it.

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Just that bit of effort this morning pretty much did me in.  I had a bite to eat, hoping it would warm and tend me.  Nope.  I didn't eat enough to cause a crash, either.  It... I simply am finished.  On to bed.  No, I didn't get the hydrant going.  No, I won't finish chores... until later.

The girls were fed, well.  I ate, and dosed.  I wanted to be careful, before doing else.  Blood sugar is 129, but less than thirty minutes after eating.  So... probably can take slow acting insulin.  It will be decreasing, but... all good.  It shouldn't drop too much.  And, anyway, I have glucose tabs upstairs if needed.  Been doing rather good, lately.  Haven't needed them in some time.

Good... afternoon, day, and goodnight.
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Well, there is that.  I had left the hydrant handle up.  There was a sad little hope that, somehow, it would start to flow.  Somehow.  So, I went to turn it off, and... it was flowing.  I must have just started, as there wasn't much water out in the area.  So... when the lemonade is offered from lemons, I... I'll take it.  I got to work trying to get the plunger adjusted.  To be honest?  I don't think it worked.  I may have overtightened.

Still, will find out if it worked soon enough.  There didn't seem to be any suction, however.  So I have my doubts.  Perhaps the rubber stopper is worn, or something else in there isn't working correctly.  But without suction, I am guessing there may yet be a problem.  Then again, maybe it drains so fast there just isn't suction.

The other problem was that it seemed to want to leak unless it was too tight.  I just don't know.  All I know is, an opportunity arose, and I took it.  I did what I could with it.  I can hope it worked.  I just have reasons not to believe so, or at least to doubt it.  No worries, you do your best, you take your chances, and you go from there.

Now I can go to bed knowing I did do something.  Well, and the cats have fresh water, and I have two fresh buckets of water by which to refill waterers, and maybe change out the girls' water as well before having to obtain more... however easily or difficult that might be.  I can check the water next time I am out, see if it will flow.  I don't have to be filling buckets to check, I suppose.

Anyway, goodnight.

There may be a solution.

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Assuming I can get the stupid thing thawed enough to run, that is.  I have been working on it, off and on, for an hour now.  I looked for either of my torches.  Neither are to be found.  I guess those were also stolen.  There are only two places they would be, and they aren't there.  Assholes steal both of them, not even leaving me one.

Chores finished early.

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Right around 08:00 to 08:30, I got out there.  As suspected, food wasn't an issue.  Water, of course, was.  It was 14 or 16 F out there, 16 I think.  Not as cold as it sounds.  No wind, not wet.  Not even too dry.  I actually think, when it is too dry, it does feel colder.  It feels, when you breath through the nose... which I do out there... as if a nose hair was pulled too.

No, just a pleasant winter day.  A bit deeper into the cold, but not unbearable, with all else for measures.  Sunny, if that doesn't add any warmth to the day... or... Nothing directly.  I am sure, without it, it would be colder.  It's just, some days, any heat from the sun doesn't seem to touch the skin.

Sort of tired, still.  Worn, getting better?  Trying to get better.  Not really improving.  I'm not sure if I have, finally, fallen behind on pill medicine.  But I did restart insulin last night.  Just can't seem to get it all straight, quite yet.  Working on it.  Eating is still off kilter, being that my schedule is off.  Getting headed back toward both days and a singular day in a day.  I really wrapped my body, as if it were a car at high speed, around a tree or light pole or such.  Didn't kill me, but sure banged some things up inside.  Heck of a ride though!

I am hoping to be up at least until noon.  But, maybe, later... The goal is to do chores again around noon to 14:00.  Then the rabbits will drink.  I am sure their waterers will be frozen by then, again.  Oh, and I am hoping to get the hydrant flowing again too, so as to refresh the girl's water, and get two buckets for refreshing the waterers.  Ugh.

I let one container of kefir go another round.  Plus the two that are working.  And, actually, I have two from the old ones still going.  They do smell okay, similar, yet slightly different.  I want to see if they will, in time, work out.  I won't be getting extra milk today, but sometime this week.  I may put those in the fridge...  And the others, once they hit critical.  I also have to clean out jars.  I have seven to clean, three being soaked as is.

Between cleaning jars and getting the hydrant flowing, and looking over internal parts for the hydrant, that will be it for the day.  Well, and chores.  Though, to be honest, a shower would be good too.  Ugh.  And food.  Do I have enough time for all that?  Maybe.  But not if I just sit here.  Though, for hydrant parts, I have to be on the machine.  Could call places, but... I'd rather at least figure out what I need.  Once that is done, then I might call some places.  The problem?  All the places I would call are big chains.  At this point, what is the difference between amazon, walmart, lowe's, etc.?  There aren't any local shops.  Wait, there... actually might be.  And they might carry the items.  But... what is their name?  I could check.  Assuming I can figure out what it is I need.  Later.

Revisited chicken was... good!

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Perhaps it was too moist, the first time.  Perhaps it was the vinegar, which had time to evaporate overnight?  Whatever the case, heated, to a point where the skin could and did crisp, the chicken tasted much better.  Next time I will merely brine it.  Then leave in in the fridge, in a wash pan, after being blotted dry, to dry more fully.  Say, overnight, tented in plastic wrap (over the wash pan, leaving plenty of air to allow the chicken to dry).  Yea, a lot of work.  But if I don't salt brine it, often it is tasting bad.  No real choice.  And, since chicken can taste really good, it turns out, if done and processed correctly...  I need the protein.

That, and cauliflower, broccoli, and water, made for a very good meal.  I could have eaten more, I think I had four and an half drumsticks, I was tiring of all the goodness.  So, shared with the girls.  They absolutely loved it, so I know it was good.  Then again, they liked it last night too, and I didn't.  Perhaps they saw the potential that I couldn't?  Though, if the chicken is bad, they really won't eat it.

Now, for another meal.  But what?  I am still a bit tired and confused, baffled by the world.  But I know I need to eat.  It helps recover, even from merely going without sleep for three days.  Hmm... perhaps a salad.  But with what?  Tuna?  Oh, I could make eggs!  If I have a pan available.  If not, I could get one ready.  I need to clean a little pot, so as to boil half the eggs, anyway.  Hmm, warm boiled eggs, though, too, would be super on a salad.

Oh, I need to set up an italian dressing.  Do I have any good oil?  If I don't have olive, I could try avocado oil?  I don't have an italian spice blend I like, but I do have bits and pieces of what I'd usually use.  Oh, and a bit of hot.  Not every time I make italian dressing, spaghetti, or such, do I like it hot.  But every third time, or so, I like some serious to light heat, depending on the mood.  So, yes, some carolina reaper flecks, some of the 90k cayenne ground, and maybe a touch of the standard hot pepper flakes.  The mix, you see, hits several levels of heat.  Actually, adding black pepper also perks those pepper tips up just a wee.  *wink*  Love me some heat, and know how to do it like a heat wizard.

Even if I don't have a salad tonight, I may go ahead and set up the spicy italian dressing for a soon to be meal.  I'll just put it in a smaller canning jar, let it marry out, overnight, then put in the fridge tomorrow.  I like to pull it out, if I think in advance, and let it warm to room temp while I wait for the meal.  Not always can that be remembered, but it's... a nice touch.

Oh, and reset kefir.  Will see how it works out.  The liquid, while not exactly whey, was put in one jar.  The grains and some of the thicker curds, were put back in the jars they were in, with milk added.  Those will get a first ferment.  The other jug will be given a second fermentation.  Tomorrow, I will probably put all in the fridge, considering getting more milk this week so as to manage that, and get it all up and going again.  Then, begin cycling the jugs through.  A jar lasting two to three days, then cycling through.  Double souring all of it, so that I don't have blood sugar spikes.  Or... that's the plan.  I sure miss that stuff.

Well... on to... something.  On to dinner.  Maybe figuring out supper, or whether to go without that.  Don't know.  Sorting out life as I wrestle with death?  Amen.

Tuesday, January 11, 2022

Not too bad out there.

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I didn't check the thermostat, but it seemed... okay out there.  Probably in the 15 to 25 range?  The rabbits were happy to see fresh water.  They all still have food, or the ones I checked.  Probably won't eat, but... who knows.  Tonight or tomorrow I need to get fresh water from the hydrant.  Which means thawing it out.  I should look for a parts kit.  As the reason it may be freezing is because it has a gasket leak inside?  I suspect so.

I have an alarm set, to feed the girls in a bit.  I am having a fatted coffee as I wake.  Will have something else shortly... perhaps a taco salad?  Maybe sardines on those keto crackers?  Or without the crackers, to cut cabs.  I may try to crisp the skin on the chicken, that might help.  The soaking may make those soggy, and perhaps it is taking up the vinegar, making it taste off?

I don't know.  Next time, I'll try just a brine.  Maybe the vinegar doesn't work well.  Well, and dry them out a bit before cooking them.  Sure extends the cooking process though.  I don't know, I'll keep trying.  Especially since chicken can be a superior protein consumable... if I can cook it, processed as needed, so as to be able to eat enough of it.

I am hoping to do more than just sit today.  What?  Laundry, dishes, drilling holes in the pipe for installing i-bolts and then setting up the hammock.  As mentioned, something I ordered was an underquilt for a hammock.  It is supposed to be comfortable to zero degrees, f.  I'd like to check it.  It isn't even that cold, so...  Still, I'd like to begin seeing about winter camping, but starting in my back yard.

Perhaps I will need more.  Beside my various multi-layer sleeping bag sets, and the underquilt, I may need a high-r value (well insulated) sleeping pad.  And, just maybe, an overquilt.  There is only one way to know.  And, to be honest, I would like to try it on the coldest day, with high winds... as if I got stuck in it, out there.  Because, I have no doubt, if I go out there, I... will get stuck in it.  It is how my life is.  Now, I don't mind, I just want to come back.  I have, always, before.  If but for the grace and blessings of God, even though it has hurt.  Or... because it hurt?

No, I want to find out what I and my equipment can take, and in a place where if it isn't quite up to snuff, getting out isn't at the cost of fingers and toes, or life itself.  God gave me a responsibility.  I take it serious.  And, yet, He knows I must go out there.  Or... plan and configure so I may.  Later.

Awake, and gladly.

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Down just before, or at noon.  Down well.  Sleep was fantastic.  I think?  I could have awaken at 19:00 to 19:30, and various times after, in half to quarter hour segments?  Initially.  My body wanted up.  It wanted to wake.  I negotiated more sack time.  Not for... my pleasure, or mere leisure, but to try to get back to days.  If I reason with it, sometimes... if in accord... it will abide my will.  This time it did, without much fuss or selling.  We both prefer days.  It makes managing everything from intermittent fasting to medicine a lot easier.  It is on-board with health, as there have been signs of improvement.  We both have... plans, hopes, for more.

Anyway, so back to sleep.  After a few automatic attempts to wake, every half hour, we finally shut off the bioautonomic beeper... on the bio alarm, and slept until nearly 22:00.  A good sleep.  Dreams, but I don't remember them.  Hmm, though, there was a particular woman I once adored in there.  A once lover.  Now I remember.  Her scent.  Her feel.  I really liked her, loved her.  Miss her.  It isn't all about sex but... sex is a powerful thing.  When you are that close, you... have become more than friends... a sort of kin?  I just couldn't always stay.  And women can't always wait.  Slaves get what we get, I guess.

I have ordered protein additives.  I will, probably, try several types.  Along with the egg whites, I should be able to reasonable add forty to eighty proteins a day, if I can't get it in my food.  Into a kefir smoothie, or with coffee.  I am sure the smoothie will be better, but the coffee, other than being a bit different, isn't bad.  It just seems like it has pepper in it?  It makes the coffee much less sweet, more... savory.  Savory!  That is the word.  I could add more sweetener, or go with butter or ghee instead of cream, and spice and herb it more to fit the savory feel?  Thinking out loud.

Anyway, yes, I have plans to get more protein in.  I am hoping to eat more, and just use the additives when I fail.  And, hopefully, at that, just twenty grams a day extra.  The first goal is to get to 150 grams of protein a day.  I have, with some effort, been able to hit between 113 and 135.  But that has been pushing, especially since I can't eat chicken as well as I had hoped.  There is no way I can eat ten pieces of chicken drumsticks.  They just... especially from time to time, are inedible.

Hmm... I wonder if there is a local who raises chickens, affordably, for sell.  Well, and perhaps I should get going with rabbits.  But, if chicken is too lean?  Rabbit, without any skin at all, would be brutal?  Hmm, wrapped in bacon?  One piece per might help, though, too?  Ugh.

Well... I best get to waking.  I will get water out to the rabbits.  Even if they only get a sip, before it freezes again, at least I have done what I can.  I really hate going out, in the cold.  But, it's... not about me.  I know it is right, and that... is right, regardless of feels.  Though, sometimes, feels... when aligned with what is good, can be wonderful.  It's just not about feels.  They can bolster what is right, but are rarely a sign of what is right.  Save pain.  If it hurts?  And you are sure to do it anyway?  That... if you aren't a masochist... which I assure you I am not... is a sign post of the right direction.  Heck, even love, here, in this fallen place, hurts.  Beautifully, sometimes, often.

Later.

Almost noon.

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I... didn't mean to, or even want to, stay awake.  But, here I am.

Definitely goodnight now.  And morning (still, here anyway), and day... good, good, all of whichever.

Oh well.

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I brined the chicken for an hour.  Then baked it, just right.  But something tastes wrong, still.  The skin, wrong.  Was it the apple cider vinegar?  Was it just too old, or not frozen quickly enough?  Not processed fast enough?  Or are my taste buds off?  Sam and Sassy both tore into it.  Though I only gave them the meat.

Because they are more than happy to eat it, I will save the rest, for them.  The broccoli was okay.  A bit overcooked.  Just a bit.  That is hit or miss, but I am getting better.  Though, this time, I was outside doing chores.  I was legitimately busy.  Just crossed wires while stumbling through the morning.

I would like to have gone to bed around 02:00 or 03:00.  That didn't work.  So, I am hoping to make it to noon.  I might.  But it's rough.  So tired.  Only an hour and a quarter to go, but some days that is a very long time.  Today is one of those days.  Still, I'll... try.  If I can't, I can't.  I won't worry.  There is tomorrow.

Oh, I should have checked the mail.  My medicine should be in.  I am just running out.  So...  I can't get in this morning.  Far too tired.  Last night?  I was too tired, and too confused.  Getting better.  I did push.  But boy did I push.  I probably got... four hours of sleep, in three days?  Just an hour and an half on the final day.  Crazy.  Some young people can't do that.  Imagine what I could, and did do, when I was young.  Things you... don't want to know.  Regardless of any other story or thought, know that, without a doubt.

What's more crazy, to me, was of all the things I did, places I went, and trouble I got into and out of, it was... a virus that got me.  If even it couldn't seem to kill me.  Something so small.  And the reoccurrence of it, the shingles, recurring chicken pox... untreated for a mere three months, got into my heart.  Herpes Zoster, or some such... which I thought was just... herpes.  Nope.  Anyway... so, yes, that is what killed me... for as well as I can die.  So far.  It'll get me, eventually.  The thing is, that can attack any part of the body.  I wonder if the boosters they gave us, when going abroad, as what they force on the military now, also played a part by making me vulnerable.  Seriously, they have been fucking vaxxes up for my whole life.  If it didn't cause the problem, it certainly may have led to it, or allowed it, or even helped it happen.

Ugh.  I'm not going to make it up longer.  Goodnight, morning, and day.

I kept thinking I'd go to bed.

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I just couldn't.  No great problem.  I'll have something to eat shortly.  I... oh... chicken drumsticks.  I will brine them, adding vinegar, for an hour.  It just really helps, as chicken has been rather skunky lately.  Winter?  Poor, few, workers... or automation isn't working out?  Whatever the case is, chicken is rough lately.

Since I am awake, I'll get the rabbits feed and water as soon as it lights up out there.  I have been feeding the girls well.  But, their litter!  Yea.  That really needs tended, reset whole I would guess.  I'll check, but... it's probably pretty rough.  When it is rough, Sam gets rough.  She is too old to care for herself as well as she would wish, especially if the pans are a bit off.

She is mostly sleeping the last of her life.  I... understand.  Medicine has helped, so I don't do that as much.  But... anything gets pushed, or pulled, or hurt, or... and I can go down hard.  Now, with medicine, it isn't quite as bad.  But, still, I know where she is at.  So, I try to keep up on things, just to ease the last of her life.  I swear, she is trying to outlive me.  I am grateful for her efforts.

Still cold, in here.  I need to insulate the house, seal cracks, do other things.  I just... haven't been able to do much.  The thing is, this will help in summer and winter.  I don't think having a home completely sealed is wise, but having it breath much more explicitly... making air transference more of a task... is wise.  Necessary.  Not sure how possible it is, but I think the drafts are mostly from doors and a few windows.  I am sure there is a way to seal up much better.  I... beside being not able, and not being able for a while, I don't know how.

Well... on to making a bite to eat.  Meat, I really need some.  And, chicken, at least with skin, does work well.  Perhaps broccoli.  And... something else.  Oh, I did get kefir sorted, and another jar started.  It sure seems like a lot of grains were made, or it is coming out very thick?  It's been a while, but this seems different.  This seems more like yogurt, cut in the container (though I didn't cut it) than kefir as I remember it.  But yogurt cultures wouldn't do that.  So... not sure what to think.

I do need to empty the other kefir I tried to make, from the refrigerated stuff.  And clean those jugs out, to get them in play for a full set of kefir, set and refrigerated, and with spare jugs ready for when I need to make more.  I will reuse the jars a few times, but at some point it is just best to completely reset the whole jug, wash one, bring a clean one in to replace, and go from there.

A shower would be good, too.  Perhaps it will warm me up.  So cold, even with the furnace up high.  Oh well.  Later.

What for supper?

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Supper?  Lunch?  Dinner?  Surely not breakfast!  Well, maybe.  By sort if not time or meal placement?  I mean, fried eggs, to me, are always breakfast foods.  And I am leaning toward eggs.  But fried, scrambled... or other?  I have been thinking about it for the last two hours.

The girls have been fed.  I haven't gotten out to the rabbits yet, but will.  Late or not, I'll... do it.  Oh, and I best get litter tended.  Probably have to throw the lot out and start over.  I did have a very good, rather long, run on keep up on litter.  I just pushed and fell, hard.

On the good side of things, I am not actually that far behind on pill medicine.  I only missed one dose in the last... two weeks or so?  At least.  I know I hit the last week of my last pill box well.  And I am just down one dose, and that from yesterday.  I may have been struggling with it, confused about days, not sure when to take it and all, but I... got it all in, save one dose, and I will try to get it in even yet.  Ugh.

Cold, people.  Colder than walk-in deep freezers.  A dry cold, at least.  And, even so, the snow is disappearing on my lawn.  Not in my field.  I suppose houses give off lots of radiant heat?  It just seems odd.  The rabbits don't even blink at it.  Their coats are quite nice.  Though, they do stay still.  You would think they would be more active, but... no.

Oh, I have chicken that needs to be cooked.  I'll check it, but it should be good.  And, tonight, I am going to try egg whites in my coffee.  Not an extremely hot coffee, I don't want it cooked.  I just want it to mix as a liquid.  Protein!  But first, to figure out, say, 20 grams of protein... also 100 calories.

Done.  As it turns out, there are ~13 tablespoons in a cup.  A serving is three tablespoons, so round to four servings provides for 1 cup... actually that is a bit more but within tolerances.  In with warmer but not too hot coffee, with cream and a few drops of two sweeteners (so as not to cause an insulin spike)... and... down the hatch?  Well?  It's... a bit different.  Not great, not terrible.  Different.

Can I eat this every other day?  Maybe.  Can I eat more of it?  Probably not in this form.  I also have protein powder on the way.  Why?  I need a lot more protein.  I simply can't eat what my body needs, even purely at maintenance.  No wonder I have grown weak.  Age will do that, but not eating well enough to even maintain muscle will lead to greater weakness.  Time will tell if protein can be leveled and maintained, then if that works... at both regaining and maintaining muscle.  I'm not going after the world cup in old guy body building, or such.  I just want to be a bit more able, fit.  We'll see.

I have carrots steaming.  I'll probably just have a few meat sticks and cheese, for lunch.  Lunch?  By time, I guess that is it.  I may get to the rabbits, while the carrots cook.  A bit warm and some cold.  I prefer hot food in the winter, it just isn't always possible.  

Hmm... the egg whites sure thicken the fatted coffee.  I am down to about a tablespoon of cream per coffee, so it had become rather watering.  The egg whites add... a fine grain?  Something like that, texturally.  Not as smooth as cream, but not terribly graining.  Just... think eggnog.  While smooth, it is thick too.  Unless you add enough vodka to enjoy it.  Well, that was my theory when younger.

Yea.  On to getting the rabbits a bit of a later night watering.  I am pretty sure they will take it whenever they can get it, in this cold and dark.  Hmm... I still wonder if there is a way... You know?  Christmas lights!  They would work around the closer cages, not really out to the outbuilding though.  Though... with the ducks gone, perhaps I could move those cages closer?  So I don't have to walk so far?  And, have access to power?  Heck, I might be able to put all the cages in there?  Maybe, just... maybe.  That would be a lot nicer for them.  And I wouldn't have to struggle with tarps, wind, else.  And... could close them up, so nothing is bothering them.  Maybe, maybe.  I'll... have to see about that.

Well... all good to plan.  But until I can function, it's... just that.  Later.

Monday, January 10, 2022

As it turns...

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I did make it awake long enough to feed and water the rabbits, this morning.  The plan, then, was to go on to bed so I would be awake in time to water them again.  Well?  As to the plan...  I wasn't able to sleep until noon.  And, I find myself waking at 20:30 or so.  All good, save that it is a bit late to water the rabbits.  Still, in a bit, after waking, I will get them fresh water.  I checked the temp outside.  At 10 to 12, their water is definitely frozen.  Probably has been most of the day.  So, fresh water, even if they only get a sip while I am out there.

Sleep was very good.  The problem is, I still don't have a day, or "day", and night... or "night".  I am sleeping about as long as I am awake, mostly?  So it is more like having two days and nights per actual day and night cycle.  Winter, pushing things, off meds... can't seem to figure out when to take them, or remember to take them.

I can't focus, remember, think well.  I'll keep at it.  At least thing have been better arranged.  And I will be getting a means of discarding large amounts of things, and then doing so.  The slog will be sorting.  What to keep, for now.  What to toss.  Perhaps even what to consider selling.  For now, however, choosing what to toss and what to keep is primary.  A box or three a day, more some days, once I have a place to put the refuse.

Food, too, is off.  I am blindly hungry when I wake, so eat.  Having two days per day, generally, means I am overeating.  But I can't focus.  I'll... eventually... sort things back out.  One problem, medicine, feed cycle, etc, at a time.  On the good side, I am generally eating right.

Oh, and kefir is going.  Either today, or tomorrow, I will drain it off, and reset.  If there are enough kefir grains created, I will do two half gallon starts.  The goal, eventually, is to have four half gallon jars going, using two to three per week.  Preferably about two per week.  One as a starter for breakfast, I guess with chia.  One small glass with each meal, for digestion.  It helps move it all along AND break down vitamins and minerals.  Plus feed and restore the gut biome.  Plus, it really does act as a sort of fiber.  Just the bulk of it.  Love the stuff.  Missed it.

Today?  Tonight?  I have no idea.  I will do whatever I can do.  Later.

Cold, and feels it.

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Some days 11 F seems cold, some days it doesn't.  Today it feels it.  Crisp.  A hard cold.  No play or give to it.  Yes, I really do believe there are days, at the same temp, that feel better.  Today isn't one of those.  Still, I got the rabbits fed and watered.  Didn't need, or even want, more food.  But water was in high demand.  I am hoping to get up and out before it gets too dark.

I wish there was a way to get some light out there, but really, I just don't have what is needed, currently.  No pun intended.  Mostly.

The girls have been fed, I have been fed.  Getting confused about days, somehow, still.  I... finally realized it was Sunday, not Saturday, or Monday as I had thought before... well.. was.  It has Become Monday, so, yes.  But... in my confusion, I missed a day of medication.

I am missing medicine, feed amounts and windows, and insulin.  I am in really rough shape.  I will simply have to do my best, recover as I can, and push through when possible... living with the consequences in the interim.  It is pretty brutal.  At least I am mostly keeping up on feed, water, and hopefully will get caught up on litter soon.

Now, for some sleep?  I think so.  I'll give it a shot, anyway.  Though, to be honest, I'm pretty sure I will sleep quite well.  I just... want something to eat, first.  Oh, I know I am eating too much.  But my body is asking for it, politely.  I am trying to offer it what is better, rather than have it come unglued and go to town, literally and figuratively, and eat like a beast.  Sometimes, if we can negotiate, we can make some reasonable compromises.

Yea, I'll... have something.  Goodnight.

A very good supper.

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I didn't even end up eating any potato.  I did add carrots, to the steaming pot.  And had both broccoli and cauliflower as well.  Those and the chops were quite enough.  I even left an ounce or two for the girls, of the meat.  Though, if there is butter in the veggie juice, they will enjoy some of that.  Cats aren't stupid.

I got the waterers all reset.  It was about time.  I had hoped to water the rabbits, but it was already dark when I woke.  And they just don't drink in the dark.  Even with a porch light on.  I might see about getting a light out there, for them, for late watering.  Though, too, their waterers needed reset.  It was a double negative.  I'll get them as soon as it is light, though may be going to bed shortly.  Still, should be up sometime in the early to mid morning range.

Oh, I may boil some eggs.  I like having some for frying and scrambling, but having some boiled is really good too.  I might be able to fit a dozen or two eggs into my menu through the week.  While not, as whole eggs, protein heavy, they are a good mix, about even between protein and fat.  And, generally, a very healthy food for a sit down or run and gun meal.  If I had boiled eggs on hand, I might not have eaten as badly when out.  Then again, I needed caffeine very badly.  When I push like that, something has to give.  Still, maybe... I might not have eaten quite so badly.  A little bad versus all and very bad?  Plus, now that I have croutons, or a replacement that is very excellent, boiled eggs on my salad is another missed treasure.  Boiled eggs and, say, canned tuna, on a salad, turn it into a real, whole, full, meal.  Especially with a homemade italian or similar dressing.

Well, not sure I can get to boiling them tonight, but maybe tomorrow.  And fry a few for breakfast, for a change.  I still really enjoy chia, just... I miss eggs, finally, again.  I think I overdid it there for a bit.  Balance.  Definitely need balance.

Well, on to... just a bit more tinkering, then bed.  Hmm, and a plate of salad.  Maybe just lettuce, dressing, and croutons.  Nothing fancy, but it sure sounds tasty.  Later, or more likely good night.

Sunday, January 9, 2022

Pork blade chops!

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Well, sounds good to me.  As well, broccoli and trying half a potato again.  With the broccoli, it is hoped my appetites will be sated.  I am trying to get over my addiction to carbs, if it's possible.  Fast carbs.  But I don't, too, wish to be completely incapable of process even fast carbs, but in smaller amounts.

I do see the similarity between carbs and booze.  The Irish nearly prove my point.  Was it because they ate so many potatoes that they became so vulnerable to alcoholism?  Did American indians have a problem with alcoholism because, much as with diseases, they really hadn't ever had access to carbs in any quantity, so were... are... nearly completely unable to resist?  Odd, how opposites can be the same.

Anyway...  two medium chops, about 8 ounces after the bones are weighed, cut, out.  Plus a healthy dose of broccoli and carrots, steamed.  Plus half a potato.  Then, either tea, a fatted coffee, or just water.  Probably just water.  Later on, probably just a deli meat and cheese sandwich.  Oh, and maybe, trying a cup of egg whites.  I wonder if that can be mixed with a warm coffee, to make a more tolerable protein drink.  I might start small, just a couple... three... tablespoons of the stuff in with a fatted coffee.

The guy, as mentioned, who suggested this, says he drinks it straight.  I'm balking at that, but, if my approach works out, or I get used to it, maybe.  Oh, I should boil some eggs, to start getting whole eggs back into my diet.  And having fried eggs a few times a week.  Boiled are good straight, on salad, they say even in soup?  Dunno, those orientals can be a bit odd with their foods... even to me.  Sometimes I like it, sometimes not so much.

Well, best check on the grill.  It is freezing out there.  And it is creeping in, even with the heat up, and dressed warmly.  Later.

Upon waking...

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I was sure it was Monday, afternoon by the time.  So, I got up and was ready  to face the week.  I am behind on... everything!  The cat litter and pans are a mess!  The rabbits, I need to water them as often as humanly possible and absolutely twice a day minimum while this new freeze has taken over.  I need to get back on a feed plan, myself, well, and make sure I am feeding the girls more often.

Everything sort of went off the rails.  Two days with less than two hours of sleep each, plus a longer day before that.  Trips here, and there.  Eating wrongly, poorly, but as needed.  It caught up to me.  Missing meds, though even when taking them, when the clock and schedule are in freespin, I am not sure they matter.  Woah.  If the place would just stop spinning for a bit!

In the old, old, old days, when life would get this bad, I would drink like three sailors.  A fifth of vodka, a fifth of Yukon Jack, and a case of beer would put everything back in place.  I couldn't drink daily.  Even weekly.  Or socially.  I drank as a medicine, for when the world went completely sideways.  And, to be honest, with nothing else in the works back then, it actually fixed things.  No, not even a consideration these days.  Medicine is almost there, finally.

It will take unbending my bent body and mind, and stretching and pushing back into some kind of shape.  Plus, doing my best with medicines and food.  Weak as a babe, I pushed hard.  Got it done though.  I have had much worse, but I was younger, fitter, and such.  Still, I will... get back on track.  And, Thankfully, it is Sunday.  I have... a bit more time before having to get back to it.  Though, I am hoping to get trash rounded up and out, and recycling too.  May not make it to the curb, may not be enough.  But... I'd like it out, then decide.  Mostly likely only one smaller bag of each.

That morning seltzer does a world of good.  I look forward to it.  Any bad tastes, or dry mouth, or such... this takes care of it.  As well, it makes up for what I lose to the water pills and keto.  I am holding off blood pressure testing until medicine and schedule... a, any, schedule, is back in play.  Right now I am sleeping, then awake, when I am, but that could be at any time.  I may even go back to bed shortly, or in a few hours, or maybe not for ten or fifteen.  I'm off my rails.  I'm not even quite ready to aim for a schedule.  Too unstable.

Still, all good.  "Breakfast" soon, some gaming to try to get my mind ordered and ready to target real world tasks.  Medicine, wherever I am with all that.  Oh, I'll get litter, and the rabbits, and the girls fed, before long.  Ugh.  A shower, it is hoped, and setting up some dishes?  Laundry is probably ready to be hit.  Well, and trash.  Just... flicking through the to-do list... lists?  Later.

Day, or night?

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What day is it?  Wow.  I sleep, then wake, eat, then sleep.  I think I missed the rabbits for a day.  I don't like doing that in the extremes... hot or cold.  I don't like doing it ever, but it happens.  Sunday.  Today is Sunday.  I am about to go back to bed.

I am terribly bent out of shape.  Not sure when I woke, yesterday.  Actually... I think it was around 17:30.  How about that.  Right when I woke, I sent a text.  It was at 17:30, on the dot.  Anyway... I have remained awake.  Still in rough shape, trying to sort things out, body, mind, food, medicine.  Everything seems like round items are trying to make it into square grooves, and it's not working.  I'll sort it out after a few days.

It is 8 F out there.  Oddly, it doesn't feel all that bad.  No wind, dry, and maybe the sun will be out today?  Difficult to tell, but it sure looked like that was going to be the shape of things.  The rabbits all looked good.  I petted some of them.  They are still rather shy, but allow it, mostly.

Taco salad for a meal last night, and a fatted coffee.  A small meal, to be honest.  And, even so, I am absolutely stuffed.  I don't quite get it.  I'm fine with that though.  I would get back to intermittent fasting, but days and nights are spinning.  until I have a schedule again, I can't sort that out.  I am back on keto, solid, though.

I did start up kefir.  The grains arrived a few days ago, but I have been too busy or too tired.  Last night, in the quiet, I put the goop in the milk and am letting it smooth in the warmth of the kitchen.  Hoping it goes quickly.  Then, to reset and double.  Starting with half of a gallon, and hope to double that as soon as there are enough extra grains.  I think that helps with digestion... makes it more complete... and pushes things through... plus increases the bio processes in there.  Plus, it's a marvelous drink.  Now that I am testing blood sugar, and all that, I'll see just how keto-friendly the homemade stuff is.  If it's not quite there, I'll have to sort out double souring it.  Basically, anything not a month old isn't too sour for me.  I've... got a gut that handled Drano without... burns through the lining.  I... can handle quite a lot.  I'll stick to kefir, though, for now on.  :p

Wow.  Amazing what happens in a few days.  Sure messed me up, but well worth the price.  Cash in the bank, a bill no longer due, registration difficulties gone.

The one thing I did buy, with some of the extra (if I was probably going to even without it), was the purchase of a hammock underquilt.  Built for winter use.  Now, to get my hammock set up out there, and a tarp over the top.  Then, to get the underquilt on it, and see how it works.  Good to zero.  Will... find out in time.  Would like a top quilt, and an insulated sleeping pad.  But... this is a start.  One thing at a time.  These are hand made, so... it'll be a day or six, or more, before it is made.  Then it has to be sent.  I am excited.  I went economy, can't afford the fancy.  But... it'll do.

Goodnight, good morning, and good day.