A bit brighter.

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The sun is out.  It was partial earlier, if brighter than yesterday at about any time.  At 9:30 it is ~45° F out there.  Pleasant, unless there is a cold wind or breeze.  But the sun really helps.  It is still a warm sun.  A bit of light did make waking easier.  Sleeping upstairs will be an advantage that way.

Whatever is or was wrong made for a miserable first half of the night.  My feet and legs were freezing, hat on and using every method I have.  Now I remember why I forget.  A method works for a short while.  Having a bit of success lifts the spirits for a bit.  If I remembered that nothing I have tried, having tried pretty much everything, while I would understand the honest truth, I would never have even short moments of functional hope.  Even heart medicine and the seeming improvement from it, are false.

I still wonder if they know what, or what all, is wrong?  If they can't fix it, why bother?  If it is eventually terminal, why mess with it.  Perhaps the experiment is a success in that it hasn't killed me yet?  Maybe people live longer when not given the diagnosis?  After last night, and the last few days, weeks, months actually, I realize there are more problems, or the problems aren't well understood.

I was finally able to warm enough to sleep better, probably after midnight.  I am still quite tired.  I woke ten after eight, the would have been second snooze.  Medicine down.  Blood sugar is 165 fasting.  I wasn't sure if today was going to be high or a lot higher.  This is actually lower, a definite surprise.  It took a bit to get started.  Tea is only finally just about ready.  Perhaps some leftover cheesy burger on a base of lettuce, with avocado, and a lighter dose of insulin?  Yeah.

I have been looking for a keto app.  The problem is, they all want information they simply don't need.  As well, the ones you "buy" will update and eventually try to charge you again, even monthly.  I am surprised people keep using these monstrosities. People are paying to be jacked, then literally robbed on top of it.  No app yet found.  I will keep looking.

Feeling a bit better.  My eyes are burning, a bit from lack of air yesterday, partly from poor sleep.  Still, better in general.  Later.