Up, if so very roughly.

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Down late, but that isn't all of it.  Medicine, and weather, and everything, conspires successfully.  I am sore, everywhere.  Even a pinched nerve affecting my right arm.  Can't feel parts of that arm right to my two littlest fingers being numb.  Odd how things work.  Minor headache, still tight from the knife dream, hungry but not, thirsty as a devil.  Still not used to medicine.  It... takes a while.  Until that happens, every day is like a middling hangover, or worse.

And, I can't seem to drink enough.  Ah... lost track of insulin.  I'll... get back on that.  Gah!  Always something.  And... the sun... I haven't seen the sun in... a while.  It is 17:50 and only 40 degree out there?  Strange.  We seem to be getting rain, more often than I think is typical.  So, there is that.  And, yes, for here, now, that is a good thing.  I'll take the difficulty darkness brings for extra water.  We are seriously low.  I am hoping they won't just dump this too.  No, I don't trust them.  California money and D.C. politics have very serious reach and influence.  Then again, enough that people die or get replaced, one way or another, if they get in the way.  Sodom will not be deprived of other people's water.

Breakfast is brewing.  I don't have any more meat thawed.  Will have to see what is in there, and pull some things out.  A roast, chops, burger and/or ground pork, chicken?  I need to get to the store, for fresh veggies to go with it.  The cabbages I bought previously are... too dated, I think.  I'll check, but... they... seem... rough.  May not have a choice though, haven't been able to get out!  Stuck, here, harshly held down by meds and weather and ill health and all.  Barely getting chores and such.  Sassy is being tended pretty well, mostly.

Will... keep trying.  Like a dog, gone overboard in heavy seas, I'll stay up and trying as long as possible.  Odd, how when I sleep, I always have ended back up on shore.  I know I can die, but...  I still, really wonder, sometimes, if this is purgatory.  Can't... die.  What I see, feel, sense, and understand is... not the whole truth of it.  I can't say this is purgatory.  Pretty sure it isn't hell, not sure it is earth, positive, actually it is neither heaven nor hell.  Just... not... quite sure if it is earth or purgatory.  Though... you should understand?  If I am in purgatory, regardless of what you believe, and you are reading this?  You are in purgatory too.  Amen.