Good morning.

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I need practice just going to bed.  I don't think it took too much longer to get to bed than planned.  But little things kept me going for a while.  I don't even remember what.  Now, I don't mind making sure little tasks are totally finished, or at least hitched for the night for an easy start when I get up.  Those are good things, both useful and they help in gearing down at times.  What I need to learn to avoid is little task just on their own.  Though they can be useful if there is still energy that needs to go, or to give a sense that life is just a bit more sound, or other things.  But they can also lead to insomnia if I am not careful.  I'm not always sure if such are a symptom, or a cause, though I suspect they can be a bit of both.  All I am saying is that I need to watch those things, check mate them if they are becoming a bother.

As I said, I got to bed early enough anyway.  I slept quite well.  Some very hard dark dream, and a couple of pleasant dreams, as you might see them.  I need the dark with the light, bittersweet being my norm.  I am trying to give up vivid dreaming.  It's just not something that, at this point, is necessary.  I did it for a very long time, but in order to fix something I was told was broken.  I have come to realized I was told lies.  Those dreams simply are real, memories.  They can't be changed, at least.  The most I could do was look around in those dreams a bit more, find details.  I never have been able to change the nature or outcome in them.  I... prefer the lies.  Nor have I been able to find proof in them.  Then again, many who told those lies believed them, or, like me, really wanted to believe the lies.  No evidence, on paper.  Not that they are my truths, perhaps there is still other ways out of them.  But not this way.  I am not sure it is that easy to give that up, but non-conscious use has helped.

Breakfast, already.  Coffee is brewing.  I already cleaned up from breakfast, and while grinding coffee, since the counter is clean, cleaned up a small spill of grinds and a few coffee drips from recent days.  Keeping up on the small stuff is part of the goal, making the bigger cleaning much easier when that is due.  Fewer layers to dig down through.  In a way, it might be less efficient.  Save that when the job gets to a certain point, it can be almost overwhelming, just figuring out where to start become a trick otherwise.  Well, and it is really good to live in a neat and clean environment.  Medicine have been taken, and have been right on track as well.  Oh, I will continue with what I have until it is gone, regarding supplements.  Some of it will not be coming back.  I really haven't had any noticeable improvement from any of it.  Oh, sure, the old ones will stay, and daily vitamins.  As to the over-the-counter heart medicine, I bought enough to last a while, and one of them is at a lower dose and I have more at a higher dose, so I will continue with those.  If no real improvement occurs on the supplemental heart stuff, I will quit those when I am out.  I may check my bp this morning, or not.  Thinking on it though.  Oh, and I am hoping to get the last of the Christmas lights down today as well.  I'll feel better with that completed.

Today is all things living room.  Mostly a soft start, just boxing books, tossing junk, dusting and cleaning surfaces as I go. If I get through that quickly enough, on to moving furniture and vacuuming.  I am hoping to wake quickly enough to push for a nap then hike, or just on to a hike, if I can, this afternoon.  Hopefully it stays cloudy, I don't mind the rain either.  I just don't care much for the heat.  Heat will always make getting out a struggle.  If I can knock out both a good two hour, at least, hike, plus do weights, then tomorrow will be even lighter.  Still a work day, but just that.  That is why I would like to push for both types of exercise in one day... gives me more of a rest between.  Or a chance to add in a bit more, if say I get enough done tomorrow, to throw a little hike in there.  Perhaps around the lake at the lower dam, or around the lake north of town, or along the bank of the river to the south... just to see what is out there, and get some air, you know?

It's going well.  I'll make it through for a good while, I think.  The right foods, medicines on target, exercise going forward, the cave getting put in order, and then being worked on and cleared of excesses, while gear is being purchased and organized.  Plus, I am learning and practicing new things, from braiding my own hair, to minifacturing items, to... who knows.  I'm still gimping it, but I am on the path that will lead to the dirt road, which will even lead, eventually, to the super highway leading to where I need to be.  The clock is, once again, ticking.  But first, today, I have to wake.