Asleep, in the chair, again.

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I tried to bulldoze through.  The bull got lost in the process.  Not... sure what time it was.  But, pretty much, was falling asleep as I was writing the last post.  Slept for an hour, maybe two?  Then... before I fell out of my chair, I nearly crawled up to bed.  Oh, but sleep is so much better in bed... or my floor matts really.  But, for me, now, that is bed.  Thanks, A.  For the... reminder, and thought.  The humility of sleeping on the floor, leaving what others think to themselves, and living a bit better for it, somehow.  A price, but it buys a powerful freedom.  I think of you, nicely, when I crawl in some nights.  Hoping you are still a floor sleeper, alive, as well as possible.  You are still loved.

I awoke to some sort of distress.  Ever done that?  But not knowing what... the cause of the problem is?  I... first... went over my body.  Looking for pain?  Injury?  Checking for illness?  But... it wasn't me?  No, it was... some terrible meowling.  Sassy?  I rarely hear that from her.

Sometimes, when she catches a mouse, she will... have a bit of a fit of some sort?  I called out to her.  I couldn't tell where she was, how far.  Too tired?  And the sound was so... unusual.  I just waking.  I kept calling, more urgently as I became afraid she was hurt.

She must have been dreaming.  It took a while.  Then, like a curious kitten, she meowed out regularly, but literally questioningly.  Meow?  A few times, and I called back.  I am all but sure she had been stuck in a nightmare.  A mouse got her?  A bigger cat?  A dog.

When she was more fully awake, she pounced up the steps.  But, in her name given way, stayed just out of reach, if quite grateful for my intervention.  Eventually she comes over, allows me to pet her, which she knows helps me wake up, which then gets her fed.  I was just about to give up, before she finally approached.  I... just go back to bed, and since she was okay really had no reason not to.  It's a bit early to be feeding here, and to be up.  But... she wanted food, and... I can, and hopefully this time will, take a nap through the night.

Oh, my mom keeps calling.  Sometimes leaving a message.  Look, I didn't mind her blocking me, and enjoying it.  Mocking me, behind my back with family and friends.  And such.  I just don't care.  But, after a time, there came a price to pay.  There isn't a way out of it.  She wants to be left alone, unless she doesn't.  But that isn't how it works.  She can leave messages.  She no longer needs, or has, access.  No hate, that's just too much work.  But I can set her aside as too frustrating to deal with.  So be it.

Blood sugar is better this morning, at 111 fasting.  That is usually my higher number.  But lately it's been pretty level through the day?  But that is with a meal in there, and coffee.  We'll see with just a coffee and water for the next few days.  Maybe I can get it to under 100, or even right at 100.  That would be good.

A bit of looking around the web.  Then on to gaming, with or slightly after coffee.  It's brewing.  Then to be microwaved.  That... works for some things I need it to do.  Do I hear a beep?  Aye!  It's time.  Good... morning, and night.  Bleh.  I'll... keep working on switching things, again, again.  Later.