Yeah?

.

.

I heard the alarm.  At three.  No dice.  Not rolling out until 7:07.  Way late, but I was up for several hours again.  So be it.  Until that gets sorted out, it will just kind go that way.  I'm not upset about it.  And, seven isn't that late.  Later than I would like, but... not terrible.

Medicine, right after taking blood sugar.  Which was 114 fasting.  Maybe not the 101 of late last night, but I am still quite pleased.

Though this?  This last week?  I can understand why people haven't gone full on carnivore.  Sure, it can, and probably will, work.  But?  But, it will take one to six weeks for it to work.  And between when it doesn't and it does?  Hell!  If you can literally take two weeks off, and don't mind being absolutely miserable that whole time?  Being unable to function?  Go for it.

But if you have a physically demanding job, a family that has expectations of you, church requirements as a member or even more?  Being unable to even walk, or possibly even tie your shoes, for two weeks?  Is a hell of a grab.

Me?  Hell, people are hoping I will die.  Save them some nickel somewhere (though it won't, they'll just replace me with three others, it's how government unions work... beyond, it's not for us, it's for them).  Still, I understand.  And, even if this somehow does eventually work, returning me to health?  At my age?  What the f am I going to do?  Walmart greeter?  Nice.

If, as I mentioned, even if I can get my stats under control, that doesn't undo the damage done for the last thirty years.  There is no recovery, no full recovery.  Perhaps a... less painful rest of my life?  Maybe a few more years?  You don't just undo nearly forty years of near death.

Anyway... a good morning.  Some pains, still.  But my body feels... tight?  My heart isn't lumping in my chest.  My lungs aren't burning to breath.  Weak as a babe, those aches... or echoes of aches.  Yea, I'll take some painkillers today.  Not as many, not the strongest ones.  Vision is improving, if still in somewhat of a tunnel vision thing, and dilated eyes.  I'd say both are down from... 80%~90%, down to 30%, give or take... and depending on the moment.  And dry eyes.  My eyes are getting used to having a lot less fluid, and this area is a dry, arid, region.

Crazy how many things could be bypassed due to odd portions of that which ailed me.  Being super hydrogenated meant dry eyes weren't a problem.  The dilation and tunnel vision though?  Just low blood pressure things?  I don't know.  I've never had blood pressure this low for a long time, or very very long when it happened.

The weakness?  Is that from my body still trying to consume carbs?  Turning protein, and even fat, into carbs... inefficiently?  My body simply not getting what it wants, so pouting... refusing to consume whole fats and protein?  Still weak.  Not as weak as I have been.  I can stand, for short bits, without shaking.  I can pick things up without the weight of just my arm burning the muscles in my arm.  But, stamina is just coming back to some very finite level.

Yeah, if I was working, even a janitor or driver or salesman, I wouldn't have been able to work.  Maybe Monday, but from last Friday to today, there is no chance.  I have been able to sleep and wake normally, strangely.  But, just sitting, most of this week.  Those little tasks yesterday... I couldn't do all planned, work very long, or get all hoped.  We'll see about today.

The car is warming.  Frosted windows.  Just going to the post office, since I missed that yesterday night.  Ugh.  Today, though.

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To the post office and back.  And time passed, so I checked bp.  At 132/82 with a pulse of 78, it's good.  I checked it immediately after returning, and it was a bit high at 148/78 with a pulse of 80.  Just a bit of time to relax, and another shot, and it is good.  So... all good.